Very Much a Lady: The Untold Story of Jean Harris and Dr. Herman Tarnower

by Shana Alexander

A classic tale of true crime, now an HBO film titled Mrs. Harris starring Annette Bening as Jean Harris and Sir Ben Kingsley as the Scarsdale Diet doctor!

Jean Harris belonged to the last generation of Americans brought up to believe that nice girls get married. But her love affair with Dr. Herman Tarnower went on for fourteen years without a marital commitment. One night Jean Harris, the prim headmistress of an elite girls' school, shot the famous Scarsdale Diet doctor to death. Was she a jealous woman bent on revenge? Or the desperate victim of a Dr. Feelgood who kept her enslaved by drugs and passion? In this incredible book, acclaimed journalist Shana Alexander exposes the dark truth behind the killing, the high drama of a sensational trial, and the fate of a complex woman doomed by her love and her own desire.

Genres: True Crime, Nonfiction, Crime, Biography

384 pages, Paperback

First published May 1, 1986

Reviews

[Bren fall in love with the sea. · Rating 3 out of 5]

"That I would attempt to write her story was inevitable from the first moment I saw her on TV".

Very Much a Lady: The Untold Story of Jean Harris and Dr. Herman Tarnower

This was a story that fascinated me and I had the opportunity to see the film, "Mrs. Harris" which is what made me decide to read this book.

It's a very dark tragic story. It was extremely well researched and well written. It is both informative and really sad. I mean all true crime reads are sad but some are written better then others.

The writer provides excellent detail about both Jean and Dr. Tarnower. As with most, if not all, crime stories, this was so senseless and trying to make sense of it doesn't work but this writer really gets into depth about, not just the two main people involved, but others as well. I think True crime readers will want to read this one.

[Jessi · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this book up at the Bozeman library book sale for $2. I think it was totally worth the $2. Since most of the action in this book took place before I was born, I wonder if I didn't connect to it as much. It's a very interesting story of a woman who had a man who "done her wrong" and she shot him. That's not super exciting and might not have made a publishable book except that the man in question was very much in the public eye as the inventor of the Scarsdale Diet and was discovered to have had several mistresses which is shocking but was even more so in the early eighties when this crime was committed.
Jean Harris was a school teacher, the headmistress of several different schools before she ended up in jail. This book paints her early life as being fairly lonely with no good father figure, a common trope in murder cases. Jean married the boy next door just to get out of the house but discovered that she didn't much care for that sort of life either. When she got divorced, Jean was at loose ends so her friends introduced her to Dr. Herman Tarnower, familiarly known as "Hi." They were immediately entranced with each other, to the point where Hi proposed. Jean demurred, feeling that getting married while her sons were still so young was going to be detrimental. Later she wondered if she should have married him because Hi immediately went back to his womanizing ways. Though Jean was generally known to be his favorite, this book mentions at least two other women Hi was seeing at the same time she was flying up to the Hamptons from Virginia to see him and it continued even after she moved up to Penn. to be closer to him.
The author paints Jean as a fairly timid woman. One who had authority but didn't necessarily want that authority. She was stressed out, in a relationship that was free in a society that looked down on such things and after fourteen years was at her breaking point. The book is incredibly sympathetic toward Jean rather than just reporting the facts, but still an entertaining book for all that.

[Paul · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliantly written and massively researched narrative and analysis of the Dr. Herman Tarnower/Jean Harris tortured romance that ended up in Harris murdering Tarnower. An insightful discussion of girls' boarding schools in the east, of the inability of the law to produce justice. Profiles Tarnower as a much-hated, brilliant opportunist with no friends and, in his opinion, no need for friends. Depicts Harris as a workaholic, yet needy person trying to find a man to replace her brutal father. Says a lot about the plight of girls in affluent families trying to make their way in a highly conformist society and not having the advantages of boys. This entire book is an ethnographic study with great insights into upper-class culture, gamesmanship, societal expectations--all entwined with a desperate romance and a murder.

Highly absorbing and compelling reading. I'd highly recommend it.

[Emilayday Adamcyk · Rating 2 out of 5]

The book is outdated. It's like the dinosaur to true crime genre but so so dry and boring. Just so many facts. Like one loooong newspaper article. It makes for a great read to put you to sleep. If suggest to skip the book and read the Wikipedia article instead.

[Laurie Haines]

I read this for the first time at the time of the infamous Scarsdale murder trial. It is just as compelling today it is the companion piece to the HBO movie Mrs. Harris with Annette Benning and Ben Kingsley. It came out a few years ago, but as well worth a watch, they both kill it!

[Gail Mclinn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book as it was an intriguing look a women's life. She was a self-made women, independent and flawed. It was an interesting interpersonal tale of the relationship of a charasmatic, charming man and how he manipulated his relationships. He, too was flawed and whether he truly loved these women who cow towed to him is a facinating personality study in itself. I like these types of stories that take a look at peoples motivations, desires and characteristics.

I'm sure this book isn't for everyone - it leaves a lot of unanswered questions. It is a story based on real people and stays truthful.

[Erika Nerdypants · Rating 3 out of 5]

The tragic story of Jean Harris and Herman Tarnower. If ever a man orchestrated his own death in step by step fashion, surely it was him. Poor Jean who always did what was expected of her, right up until the bitter end. A very sad but gripping story, difficult to put down.

[Kathy · Rating 4 out of 5]

The tragic story of Jean Harris and the murder of her lover, the Scarsdale Diet Doctor.

[Beth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reads like a soap opera and the story is pretty engrossing, but the message is a depressing one for women of ambition. . .

[Elaine · Rating 4 out of 5]

A story of love, longing, violence, sex and tragedy among the nation's elite.

[Joanne Poppenk · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this years ago and remember being deeply affected by it. It was one of the first cases where mental/emotional abuse was considered a defence for murder in the U.S. as the issue of domestic violence, shocking in itself at the time, was just beginning to come out of the closet. While producing a strong empathy for Ms. Harris, the author manages, as I recall, to allow the reader to determine his or her own conclusion to the case. A compelling but harrowing read.