This basic grammar book highlights fifty mock rules, each using the mistake it purports to correct, such as the "Passive voice should never be used" and "A writer must not shift your point of view"
William Lewis Safire was an American author, columnist, journalist and presidential speechwriter.
He was perhaps best known as a long-time syndicated political columnist for the New York Times and a regular contributor to "On Language" in the New York Times Magazine, a column on popular etymology, new or unusual usages, and other language-related topics.
The rules have changed somewhat, even in the last 25 years. The rules have somewhat changed, in the last 25 years even. The rules will have changed in 25 years. The change of rules happened over 25 years. After 25 years, the rules changed. Twenty-five years, and the rules have changed. After twenty-five years of change, the rules are still rules. The rules: after 25 years, they change. The rules have changed; twenty-five years is not so long. The rules changed, after 25 years? Twenty-five years, and the rules changed! The rules changed over a quarter-century. The rules were to change after 25 years. The rules must change over 25 years. The rules, they changed, and it took 25 years. Rules? All changed.
In the early 70's I was a counselor at a camp for girls. The camp was located in West Virginia. As a result of the close location to Washington DC, we had many campers who had parents that were "somebody"- a Senator's (later Vice President's) daughter, an ambassador's daughter, and I'm sure we even had daughters of CIA operatives (though we probably thought the parents owned a dry cleaners or something.)
One such girl was a diminuitive, blue-eyed, dark haired, fair skinned child, who told us in no uncertain terms that her name was "Annabel Abigail Victoria Pennina Safire". How can you argue with that? When you would ask her if she had enough juice at breakfast, she would tell us, "I have a quantity sufficient." When other children would protest a counselor edict (i.e. "Lights out, NOW!") by whimpering "That's unfair!", Annabel would murmur "that's inequitable."
When Annabel's parents came up for visiting day, they brought the counselors a large picnic basket of goodies. It was only after they returned from DC, and I asked the camp director for their address to send a thank you (Yes, my mother raised me right in terms of manners, though she failed miserably in my grammer, spelling and typing), that I realized the affable father of this child with the offbeat locution was THE William Safire. You never saw anyone rip open an envelope so fast to double check what she had written in a letter.
1. Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read. 2. Don't use no double negatives. 3. Use the semicolon properly, always where it is appropriate; and never where it isn't. 4. Reserve the apostrophe for it's proper use and omit it when its not needed. 5. Do not put statements in the negative form. 6. Verbs has to agree with their subjects. 7. No sentence fragments. 8. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out. 9. Avoid commas, that are not necessary. 10. If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing. 11. A writer must not shift your point of view. 12. Eschew dialect, irregardless. 13. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction. 14. Don't over-use exclamation marks!!!!! 15. Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of ten or more words, to their antecedents. 16. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky. 17. Never, ever use repetitive redundancies. 18. Also, avoid awkward and affected alliteration. 19. Hyphenate between syllables and avoid unnecessary hyphens. 20. Write all adverbial forms correct. 21. Don't use contractions in formal writing. 22. Writing carefully dangling participles must be avoided. 23. Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague, seek viable alternatives.
I learned a few things. There are some grammatical rules that are too complex to understand. Well, I don't use exlamation marks anymore because this author thinks that they should not be used, for the most part.
Although Safire was a well-know columnist and language connoisseur, I was not exactly impressed with this book as a true guide to grammar and usage. While parts were amusing and even interesting, I was not thoroughly 'guided.' In fact, some sections were rather confusing to me - a former English teacher and grammar-Nazi - and I know the rules.
I'm not exactly sure who Safire's intended audience is, but I suspect it's mostly for his fans and followers. Students in grades 7-12 who are still learning the rules of good writing (grammar, usage, syntax, and word choice) would certainly benefit from such a text but would hardly get past the introduction. The average adult hoping to quickly learn the rules of writing would be hard-pressed to explain, much less demonstrate the 50 rules outlined in Safire's book because he doesn't clearly outline the each rule and its correction.
For those searching for a concise, easy-to-read grammar guide, I recommend Strunk and White's The Elements of Style. Packed inside the 105-page book, Strunk provides examples of what not to do; but, more importantly, he explains the why and furnishes solutions to correct each writing error.
This was not only fun,it actually cleared up certain uncertainties about tricky points of grammar. Yes, even experienced writers often need guidance, and this witty little gem has it. This one is on the shelf next to Strunk and White (The Elements of Style). Five stars to self-proclaimed grammar maven William Safire, because he really is. CLB
In an average day, my coworkers and I encounter all the mistakes Safire addresses. The funniest one I encountered last week applies to the fumblerule "Proofread carefully to see if you any words out": "In edition [sic], the House version of the FY 2005 Defense Bill phase out the age-62 over 3 1/2 years."