Dealing with People You Can’t Stand, Revised and Expanded Third Edition: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst

by Rick Brinkman, Rick Kirschner

The classic guide to bringing out the best in people at their worst--updated with even more can't-standable people!

"Dealing with People You Can't Stand "has been helping good people deal with bad behavior in a positive, professional way for nearly two decades.

Unfortunately, as the world becomes smaller and time more compressed, new difficult people are being made all the time. So Kirschner and Brinkman have updated their global bestseller to help you wring positive results from even the most twisted interactions you're likely to experience today.

Learn how to get things done and get along when you're dealing with people who have the uncanny ability to sabotage, derail, and interfere with your plans, needs, and wants. Learn how to: Use sophisticated listening techniques to unlock the doors to people's minds, hearts, and deepest needs Apply "take-charge" skills that turn conflict into cooperation by reducing the differences between people Transform the destructive behavior of Tanks, Snipers, Know-It-Alls, Whiners, Martyrs, Meddlers, and other difficult types of people

Whether you're dealing with a coworker trying to take credit for your work, a distant family member who knows no personal bounds, or a loud cell phone talker on line at the grocery store, "Dealing with People You""Can't Stand "gives you the tools for bringing out the best in people at their worst.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Psychology, Business, Leadership, Management, Communication

382 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 1994

Reviews

[Brian · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a Manager Tools recommendation.

The concept of this book is pretty simple and straightforward: choose a person you can't stand, identify which of the 10 personality types mentioned in the book they most closely match, and follow the specific recommendations to immunize yourself against further annoyance. The 10 types listed in the book are:

1. The Tank
2. The Sniper
3. The Grenade
4. The Know-It-All
5. The Think-They-Know-It-All
6. The Yes Person
7. The Maybe Person
8. The Nothing Person
9. The No Person
10. The Whiner

The book is divided into two main sections. The first section focuses on communication. Specifically, around effective practices and common mistakes. Active listening, tone of voice, and other skills are highlighted here and this section is a blend of theory and broadly actionable advice.

The second section of the book highlights each of the 10 personality types listed above and gives "teachable equivalent" ways to deal with them effectively. Each of the ten chapters in the section starts with a fictitious scenario that will be familiar to anyone who has worked with people (as opposed to dogs and trees). Action steps are outlined for dealing with the personality type, along with some background and reasoning for the recommendations. Finally, the fictitious scenario is revisited, this time with a resolution aided with the chapter's recommendations.

[Semi-Academic Eric · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book might tend to solidify perceptions of people and thereby keep people in boxes. However, I found some of the communication tips to be helpful. We must be careful, though, I think, to not get stuck in perceiving someone as a tank or a sniper or other type. People change. Some mental constructs make it hard to change with them.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

I originally picked this book up cheaply just because the title made me giggle, and I was curious. Little did I realise that this book is actually a hive of really genuinely helpful information!

My predominant use of the techniques described in this book was in running my World of Warcraft guild - what can essentially be thought of as a voluntary team of 25 people. If it's any testement to what I learned in this book, the guild became the most successful on our server, ran for several years, and had a very low member turnover. I was considered one of the best leaders and still receive thank you cards even after retiring the guild in 2010!

If that's what you can get out of it for a video game group...you can imagine how excellent this is for dealing with people in the workplace.

Give it a try! Despite the goofy illustrations, there's some gems in there.

[Andix · Rating 4 out of 5]

- 4 types of main goals in a meeting:
task solving: take a decision quickly
right solution: let's analyse more
people pleasing: let's ask everyone
show: we take this decision but let me tell you about...
- general skills in a conflict with sm:
diffuse the bomb: blend in to match the behaviour (volume, language, body language) to have more in common and redirect the communication
listen to understand (people want to be heard): blend in (nodding in agreement, leave the impression that you understand); backtrack the information (repeat what they say); clarify by asking questions; summarize the information; confirm that what you understood is true => the person is more cooperative, understanding of the other's point of view is achieved
blending in: find similarities -> conflict is inflicted by differences => reduce differences
identify positive intent + standards and evaluation criteria on the others
change your reactions, tone, the perspective: imagine the future when the problem doesn’t matter anymore
- 13 types of difficult people
the tank: pushy, aggressive, confrontational, angry, his attacks are not personal, only seeks to obtain smth
! don’t attack/ defend/ withdraw -> show opposition, gain respect
• hold the ground: stay put, regain self-control
• interrupt the attack: repeat his name, speak calmly and assertively
• backtrack his main points, repeat the facts
• find the common ground: the same intentions, future value
• make peace
the sniper: sarcastic, rude, makes others look stupid, teaser, attention grabber
! amused curiosity + take him out from hiding => puts the behaviour in perspective
• backtrack what he says, ask searchlight questions: what are you really trying to say, what does that have to do with this => refocuses attention
• command respect from him + audience
• talk in private with him to solve the grudge
• suggest alternative behaviour for the future
the grenade: briefly calm then exploding about smth else, wants recognition
! take control of the situation, diffuse it
• get his attention: call his name, raise the volume
• say what they need to hear, show concern
• adapt the intensity to match his when he calms down
• take time away to cool down
• find the pin and don’t pull it in the future
the know-it-all: low tolerance for contradiction, it’s always someone else’s fault, dominates, manipulates and controls
! open his mind to new ideas, present them in an interesting way
• know your stuff: no flaws, clarity
• backtrack the information -> shows respect and understanding
• bland with their doubts, show how your idea takes them into account
• present ideas indirectly: maybe/perhaps, use plurals, use questions not statements, include his doubts in the questions
• recognize he is a mentor, his merits
the think-they-know-it-all: can fool people enough times, wants appreciation and attention, have just enough knowledge about a subject, exaggerates
! catch him in the act
• give a little attention: enthusiasm, backtrack questions, acknowledge the intent not the content
• ask for specific details with curiosity
• tell the idea from my point of view with evidence
• don’t embarrass him: make him an ally, threw in a different idea and suggest they are related
• tell him the consequences of his behaviour + give him credit for what he did right
yes person: people pleaser, unconfrontational, forgets previous commitments, over commits, makes excuses blaming the circumstances, not organized
! teach them task management, make them commit to realistic tasks that they can handle
encourage honesty in a comfortable environment
• teach them how to plan, prioritize
• make them commit: have them summarize the situation, obtain the commitment in writing or a promise, set deadlines, present negative consequences
• strengthen the relationship: describe facts, what they did right + wrong, how other people are affected, how you feel, ask them what they’ve learned
maybe person: procrastinator, doesn’t seek help, doesn’t have a system for choosing between imperfect choices
! give them a method for decision making + motivation
• create a comfort zone
• clarify options and their impact
• teach them a method for decision making -> write down pros/cons + comparisons
• assure them there’s no perfect solution
• strengthen the relationship, listen to their concerns
nothing person: no verbal and non-verbal feedback, passive, withdrawal from conflict
! make them talk
• include more time to relax yourself + them
• open-ended questions, expect longer answers
• use humour and guessing
• show the future
no person: negativistic, defeats big ideas and motivation, seeks perfection, passive, hopeless
! move from fault finding to problem solving
• get specific + ask for details not generalizations
• don’t try to change them, use them as smoke detectors
• give them more time to change their mind
• go in the opposite direction, exaggerate their negativity so they react with positivity
• acknowledge the good intentions
the whiner: helpless and overwhelmed, doesn’t want solutions, only to be heard, negativity, no idea how to change things
helpful (often coupled with solutions)
therapeutic (to release the frustrations)
obnoxious
don’ts
agree with them => they will keep complaining
disagree with them => they repeat the problem
solve their problem -> you can’t
ask them why the chose you to complain to
dos: patience + compassion + focus on solutions
! help them reduce the feeling of helplessness + identify solutions
• listen the main points and clarify them
• get specific and ask for details not generalizations
• move in different directions to offer them perspective -> focus on solutions
• show the future
• draw the line: take control, show negative consequences
the judge: high standards, critical
! get defensive + don’t question the critics + dismiss the judgement
• acknowledge the judgement and move on
• backtrack the judgement, ask specifics
• appeal the sentence, give alternatives
• go in the opposite direction to what you want and exaggerate a bit
• appreciate their intent and show how their critics don’t obtain the desired effect + suggest options
the meddler: knows what’s best for others, seeks to manage others, no confidence in you
! set boundaries
• appreciate their intentions
• focus them in other directions: throw them another bone to pick
• meddle with the meddling: ask them questions about their standards, have prepared answers, create diversions
• negotiate boundaries: appreciate their motivation, describe the problem, the effects, let the meddler explain, set the boundary
the martyr: needy giver that expect much in return, wants appreciation and to get along, makes you feel guilty
! reduce the guilt + focus on positivity
• give back attention, appreciation, take their side
• disrupt the guilt: ignore it or make them feel guilty for making you feel guilty, eliminate the obligation, balance the credit/ debt with that person
• fix their upset: exaggerate the hopelessness, counter the frustrations
• say no to unreasonable demands
• recognize their positive intent

[Huda m · Rating 2 out of 5]

أتعلم أيها الكاتب ما لا أحتمله حقًّا؟؟ تصنيف الناس إلى مجموعات و التعامل معهم بأسلوب ميكانيكي كالذي تنصح به في الكتاب. البشر كائنات معقدة و تتحكم بتصرفاتهم الكثير من العوامل و الأسباب التي من المستحيل أن تختزلها في كلمة واحدة... لذلك لا أجدني أنجذب لكتب الـ
Self-help
فهي في أغلب الأحيان تقوم بعملية الفرز هذه التي أبغضها للغاية

[Areej M. · Rating 4 out of 5]

كتاب مهم ... تدور فكرته على التالي:
حتى تستطيع ان تتعامل مع اؤلئك الذين لا تتطيق التعامل معهم لأنهم (أشخاص لا يطاقون) عليك أن تعرف المصدر الذي يحولهم الى (أشخاص لا يطاقون) ...
التعامل معهم بناءً على هذه المعلومة الإضافية يسهل مهمة تجاوز الصراع معهم ...الـ(أشخاص لا يطاقون)حسب الكتاب اما يسعون لانجاز المهمة او اتقانها، واما يحاولون الانسجام مع الناس او التألق بينهم واصابتهم بالخيبة من عدم القدرة على تحقيق ذلك يحولهم الى 10 نماذج من الاشخاص المملين.

الكتاب جميل وممتع ويعطيك اضاءات متعددة وستصادف نفسك حتماً بين صفحاته لكنني لسبب مجهول اصبت بفتور في الثلث الآخير منهم.

[Katie · Rating 1 out of 5]

Couldn't do it. Life is too short and this book is too stupid.

[Engy Fouda]

الكتاب في المجمل لطيف و صغير و مش ممل خالص بل إلى حد ما سريع و الكاتب مركز على أهدافه في الشخصيات التي لا تُطاق
بس فيه شخصيات الظاهر انها مصرية فقط مش موجودة في الكتاب زي:
المتشائم و الكسلان و الغبي و اللي عامل نفسه غبي و الأهبل اللي مبيفكرش و بيعمل مصايب طول الوقت و اللي بيستخف دمه و يضحك الناس و يستغلهم يشيلوا شغله أو اللي بيعمل نفسه نساي أو اللي ميعملش حاجة عير بعد محايلة و نوعيات أخرى لعينة ربنا يعافينا

و ال
Combinations
بقى كمان
يعني مثلا القاضي و متشائم و بيعيط الخليط ده الواحد يجي ينفذ معاه خطة القاضي يلاقي التشاؤم نط في وشه تحاول تهديه يبدأ العياط و الشكوى و الاكتئاب
نظبط الجاكيته البنطلون يضرب
أو اللي بيقول لأ طول الوقت عشان كسلان و مش عايز يعمل حاجة فبيقفلها على الكل
و هكذا

[Morgan Dean · Rating 5 out of 5]

FIVE STARS. SO GOOD. This book provided so many helpful insights and forced me to examine the relationships in my life, as well as my own behaviors. I feel like I already have a better idea of where to start when conflicts arise in my life. Highly recommend this read to all!

Also quick flex - I've met Dr. Rick Brinkman and he's the coolest 😁 Passionate, bright guy who knows what he's talking about and wants to spread his knowledge to all. S/o to Dr. Rick B!

[Jen KD · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a good resource filled with realistic strategies. It’s written by two doctors of naturopathic medicine. They definitely specialize in communication and behaviors! They give concrete examples of different challenging personalities people tend to fall into (grenade, sniper, tank, maybe, always says yes, my way, whiner...). They illustrate each type with scenarios, which helped me to associate the types with different people I know. Then they give strategies to help you navigate your interactions with these people. Most people of course fall into multiple categories depending on who they are with, work/home, etc. What’s most important is not to fixate on what category people fall into, but rather start using some tools and see if it helps you (y’all) communicate better!

Two questions I grappled with were:
1. Is this a fancy guide to manipulation?
2. Will is work?

I came to these conclusions:
1. If the manipulation works and it’s not harming people, then why not try it? Also, manipulation is a negative way of basically saying behavior management... which we are encouraged to use! (Shades of meaning! Discuss bossy::assertive::confident)
2. If it does work, your situation improves! If it doesn’t work, you still get to deal with frustrating people and you’ve lost nothing.

“Unfortunately there will always be a few people...think of (it) as a trip to the communication gym (where) you can work out your communication muscles and communication stamina.”

“You’re nobody’s victim without your permission” -Eleanor Roosevelt

[Supachai Chavitranuruk · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quite straightforward. Great words usage. Just perfect.

The 10 Types of difficult people are:

Tanker - Always pushy and ruthless
Grenade - Explode their feeling easily
Whiner - Like a screamer in LFD2
No Person - Always says "NO"
Yes Person - Always says "Yes" and "Okay"
Maybe Person - Decisive guy.
Sniper - Attacks by using one's weaknesses
Think-They-Know-It-All - Pretends to Know everything
Nothing Person - Have you seen him? "Haven't seen yet" answered, The Nothing Person
Know-It-All - A movable information center; the Big Data

And the rest are the way to deal with these problematic people

[Khadijeh Za · Rating 4 out of 5]

ربما يتعين عليك ان تصل الى اعماق قلبك لتجد ذلك المكان الذي يهتم بالآخرين بصدق و اخلاص
...
كل الاشياء تمر واذا افسحت لها مجالاً فإنها ستزول دون أن تأخذك معها
...

[Christie Bane · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is full of 5-star advice for dealing with difficult people - solid, practical, easy to follow, and effective. I marked it down a star because I felt like the example stories using cartoon animals (Suzy Squirrel??) were a little ridiculous and detracted slightly from the quality of the book over all. I mean, did the authors not know actual humans who could illustrate their points perfectly? I do! Aside from that, I highly recommend this book, and I have a ton of both experience and success with dealing with difficult people, so I know what I’m talking about.

[alazga · Rating 4 out of 5]

le daria 3 estrellas y medio pero gudrids venga pon ya pa poner media estrella asique tiro mas para 4 estrellas porque oye es largo y se repite bastabte pero es divertidillo y explica todo de forma amenilla la verdad que a ver el resumen es tener paciencia porque hay gebte de todo tipo y probablemente tu seas uno de los tipo de persona que describe al principio como "persona complicada" pero básicamente que lo mas importante es tener paciencia empatia y saber escuchar
la verdad que me ha gustado no me lo esperaba asi pero lo que he dicho que al final se hace muy pesado

[Poetic Diva504 · Rating 4 out of 5]

While you should always stay away from people who test you or treat you like you’re less than, there will be times when you can’t avoid it. In this book, there are examples provided to help you reason with people who push your buttons. There are methods to disarming the most stubborn and difficult of them all, but use them at your own risk.

[Nathan Albright · Rating 5 out of 5]

In reading this book I was struck by a very powerful set of mixed feelings.  On the one hand, I could read in these pages plenty of commentary and tactical advice on how to deal with people who drive me to distraction, and it was without question a useful book on communication [1].  On the other hand, reading this book was painful in a sense, because it brought forcefully and unpleasantly humorous to light the fact that I am almost certainly to many people the sort of person who they cannot stand, who frustrates them and drives them to distraction.  Not only is this the result of my own fairly typical prickly nature in this regard, but is an explicit aim of the book, which presents the reader with a jocular look at what to do when you are the difficult person, as I often am.  There is an implication here that those who read this book are likely far better off than ordinary humanity, not only because of the blessings that come from a life that allows one to read this sort of book for pleasure or self-development, but also because paying attention to what others tend to take for granted is the first step to growth, if not the last.

In terms of its contents and structure, this book is divided into a thematic and schematic format, and contains a great deal of humorous discussion as well as anthropomorphic discussions of people in various ways.  The first part of the book introduces the reader to the types of people they cannot stand:  the tank, sniper, grenade, know-it-all, think-they-know-it-all, yes person, maybe person, nothing person, no person, whiner, judge, meddler, and martyr, and looks at the situations that bring out these particular unpleasant sets of behavior and the threatened intents that trigger them.  The second part of the book gives targeted and focused tactics on survival through skillful communication--moving from conflict to cooperation, listening to understand, reaching a better understanding, speaking to be understood, getting what we project and expect, and changing our own attitudes.   The third part of the book looks at the thirteen problematic types of person and gives ways on dealing with these people successfully through advice and humorous mock case studies, and prods the reader into reflecting on how they are the problem people in the lives of others as well.  The fourth part of the book contains specific tips on how to use the book's insights when dealing with phone and online communication.

There is no question that this is a book aimed at a professional audience, in that it deals with work and most of the examples are chosen from that sphere of life.  The book does discuss how we deal with friends and in families as well, though, so the authors are clearly aware of how the principles are more widely accessible even if there is a professional focus.  Although the book was painful to read, given my own longstanding and serious struggles with communication, the book is one I can recommend wholeheartedly, although I feel it necessary to note that those readers who are as sensitive as I am are likely to find a great deal in it that reminds us of our own failings as skillful and gracious communicators with others.  As I believe that at least some painful reflection is helpful in growth, though, I still recommend the book nonetheless despite my own melancholy when I reflect on the state of communication in my own personal life as well as in the professional world in which I inhabit.  Perhaps you will feel the same yourself after you read the book, with its strong medicine delivered with a high degree of humor and lightheartedness.

[1] See, for example:

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2017...

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2017...

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2017...

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...

https://edgeinducedcohesion.blog/2016...

[Motaz Nachwati · Rating 3 out of 5]

كتاب جيد ..
يتحدث عن نماذج من الناس موجودة بالحياة الواقعية ، و يعلمك كيف تتعامل مع كل منها على حدة
بل و ينظر أيضا من الجانب الآخر .. أي عندما أكون أنا أحد هذه النماذج الصعبة السلوك
و لو لفترات محدودة , كيف أساعد نفسي للتخلص من السلوك الصعب .

الشيء المشترك بين جميع الشخصيات .. تقريباً .. هو إيجاد الأرضية المشتركة
بيني و بين الطرف الآخر.

بالمختصر .. من الجيد الحصول عليه.

[سعودية]

هالكتاب يعجبني .. كل ما طفشت من المديرة اقراه P:

[Justice Kali Di Quartuccio · Rating 1 out of 5]

The book starts off with Part 1: Getting to Know the People You Can't Stand:
1) The Tank 2) The Sniper 3) The Know-It-All 4) The Think-They-Know-It-All 5) The Grenade 6) The Yes Person 7) The Maybe Person 8) The Nothing Person 9) The Whiner 10) The No Person 11) The Judge 12) The Meddler 13) The Martyr

Twenty-two chapters of this and I come to the conclusion that 99.9% of everyone I have ever known, loved, hated, and worked with has been one of these people at some point, and I have been every single one of these thirteen people at various points in time. Great.

Take away from Part 1:
We are all annoying, obnoxious, and need to learn how to have more effective meetings. Acceptance is the first step to self-love. Ugh.

Part (I'm not sure anymore):
Good news! Chapter 23: Appropriately Titled, What if People Can't Stand You?

Well, normally I'd say to hell with them, flip a middle finger and move on, but I was aiming for a bit of self-improvement in the new year of my middle years, so I continued reading...

I reached the end of the book, and it turns out, I could have quit after realizing that none of us can stand each other and we can't stand ourselves.

Takeaway:
1) Become an entrepreneur.
2) Work alone.

Recall the genius of Andy Warhol, "One's Company, Two's a Crowd, and Three's a Party!"
Skip this one.

[Kathrynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked the contents of the book, but the title is horrible and does not do the book justice. I would like to recommend the book to co-workers, but with a title like that it won't happen.

The author does a good job explaining the possibilities of how other's may be thinking in order to understand where they are coming from, e.g., the bully or sniper (my favorites). The author provided tips to work with difficult people from a variety of personalities.

Solid 4 Stars

[Kevin Hogan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Got this book as part of a class on the subject. It's well-written and the ideas are worthwhile.

I have found it useful, and believe I will continue to find it useful.

It will go on my shelf of business books that I keep at work.

[Heather Elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Idk personally maybe people should stop being jerks

[G. Lawrence · Rating 5 out of 5]

Helpful, although the illustrating stories for each type of difficult person are a bit odd, there are practical strategies here for dealing with difficult people (including if the difficult person is yourself!).

[H. · Rating 2 out of 5]

2 stars

—
Quick summary of thoughts:

They put people in boxes and made them into caricatures. Some of the messages were useful, like taking into consideration that actions are affected by motive and priority, but you might find that you already knew that and thus gain nothing from this book.

While the messages behind the communication tips were solid, the examples of how to communicate were cartoonish and unrealistic and would sound patronizing to anyone you tried this on (this is where I stopped because this was supposed to be the meat of the book and there was nothing more it could deliver).

While some of the general advice and insight is usable and some of the examples given were good illustrations of character in some cases, but there were no revelations or (to me, at least) anything worthwhile.

[Mckinley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tank (confrontational) - hold ground, interrupt attack, backtrack to main point, aim for bottom line; if you are wrong: admit mistake, state briefly what you've learned, and what you'll do to prevent from happening again

Sniper (hidden shots) - look at situation and backtrack, use a searching questions to probe what other is trying to say (insinuate), use tank strategy if necessary, bring up past grievances

Know it all (and you're to blame) - be prepared and knowledgeable, backtrack, meet their doubts and desires, present own views indirectly,

Think they know it all (blame others for the attention) - give them attention, clarify specifics, tell it like it is, give them a break,

Grenade (explosive) - get their attention, show genuine concern, reduce intensity, take a break, question them about what triggered them (later on)

Yes (over-commit and forget) - establish trusting environment, talk honestly, help them plan, ensure commitment from them

Maybe (procrastinate) - establish comfort zone, raise problems and clarify options, use decision-making process, reassure and see to follow through, build relationship

Nothing (no feedback) - plan enough time, ask open-ended questions, lighten it up, guess, show the consequences

Whiner - listen for main points, interrupt and get specific, shift focus to solutions, show them the consequences, draw the line

No (everything is bad/wrong) - use whiner strategy, use as a resource for potential problems, prolong decision making time-frame, use polarity /opposite to motivate them, acknowledge their good intentions

Judge (standards no one van meet) - acknowledge judgement and move on, back-tract to point and question, think about or state evidence, use polarity response, state their good intention and say how it's backfiring followed by what they could do that would work better

Meddlers - appreciate their attention, give them a place to meddle, negotiate boundary and plan a meeting (open with positive, describe problem, talk about effects, let them reply, describe boundary, establish signal, reinforce boundary

Martyrs (needy givers) - give positive comments, disrupt guilt trip (strip it, flip it, snip it, nip in bud), help reset (respond to exaggeration, counter frustration, and upgrade preferences), say no to unreasonable requests, help see behavior (problem, how defeating, other options)

[Cleopatra Pullen · Rating 4 out of 5]

How to deal with people you can't stand is something that we all have to do at some time. Usually we resort to the same old strategies which have worked in the past, albeit on a different person who annoys in a different way. I had gone through my set responses to someone I have to work closely with, I was just becoming more annoyed so I opened this book and read.

This book puts people into groups allowing you to categorise the source of your annoyance and giving you tips on how to handle them. Important note this is all about changing your response to the annoyance, and not changing the other person.

Has it worked? Well to some degree, I have been able to use some of the tips, some of the others are so far away from where I normally operate that they would feel false. I have confronted some of the behaviour so perhaps I should have read this much earlier in our working relationship.

On the whole as a reference book it is excellent place to start to understand why people behave the way they do, they may simply want people to acknowledge their experience, knowledge and just like you they want to be appreciated. The book makes the following point in a number of situations; sometimes all you have to do is give people a little of what they want to get what you want.

I received a copy of this book from Amazon Vine

[Bridgett Ashley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sometimes the universe is telling you something. This book was chosen by my professional development reading group for this quarter's book. I'd never heard of it, but agreed to another member's recommendation because it sounded interesting. I always wait until a couple of weeks before we meet to read the book we've chosen, so it'll be fresh in my mind for the discussion, so I hadn't gotten around to reading it yet, when my manager decided to send me to a leadership workshop/conference. The conference had an extensive recommended reading list, and *Dealing With People You Can't Stand* was on that list. As soon as I got home I picked the book up and started reading. And I'm so glad I did. I've been struggling with yes people, maybe people, no people and whiners on my team that I'm fed up with. I took over the team not quite two years ago, and I'm not kidding, another team lead asked me who I'd pissed off to get put in charge of that team. Now I've been reading every team building and leadership book I could get my hands on, but nothing gave me insight into what was going on the way this book did. I know it's not going to be easy, but at least I have a path forward now that I didn't before. I feel like I've been thrown a lifeline.

[Inversor2185 · Rating 4 out of 5]

Está bien, aunque termina siendo algo repetitivo. Los tipos de personas que se describen son conocidos, nada nuevo, pero es interesante el planteamiento que propone para lidiar con estos personajes.

[ضهرا درعلی · Rating 3 out of 5]

خب این میتونه کتاب خیلی مفیدی باشه اما نه برای من!
این کتاب واسه عده ای میتونه فوق العاده موثر باشه!افرادی که حوصله دارن برای سروکله زدن با بقیه,افرادی که حوصله وقت گذاشتن برای دیگران رو دارن!
واسه عده ای مثل من که تحمل سروکله زدن با افراد ناهنجار رو ندارن و کلا افرادی که مزاحمشون هستن رو از زندگیشون حذف میکنن نمیتونه مفید باشه!
خیلی جاهاتو کتاب میگفتم یعنی اینقدر وقت بزارم واسه یک آدم؟خب میزارمش کنار ,راحت تره که:-؟
ولی همه جا هم نمیشه افراد ناهنجار رو کنار گذاشتاون موقع که برسه دوباره این کتاب رو خواهم خوند:-"!

[Bashayer AbdulAziz · Rating 3 out of 5]

أضاف لي الكثير هذا الكتاب
يتكلم عن ٩ أصناف -تقريبا - مزعجة من بني البشر نقابلهم من حولنا في حياتنا
وماهي هي دوافعهم واستراتيجيات التعامل معهم
وفي النهاية يتعرض فيه إلى ماذا لو كنت أنت أحد هذه الاصناف ؟