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Where I End and You Begin
In Japan, they say there’s a red thread of fate that binds people who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance. It may tangle, it may knot, it may stretch or fray, but it will never break. It is a future as indelible as the past.
I hope that isn't true. I pity anyone destined to meet me.
----
For Bianca Ray, the past is always catching up, one way or another. Now in her third semester at college, it's doing it again. Too much drinking has led to plummeting grades and rising absences, putting her scholarships in peril. When she makes it clear that she needs help—all over the floor of her history class—she’s given one last chance to shape up: seek therapy and bring her grades up by the end of the semester, or she’s out.
Enter Catholic seminarian Daniel McGuire. The last thing Bianca wants is an aspiring priest to counsel her on how to live her life, but the handsome graduate student is different from the holy rollers she fled from at home. Gentle and unobtrusive, he helps her pick up the pieces and find a new way to live: not running from the past, but facing it head on.
But opening up her heart to release the pain means that something else can come in. As Bianca and Daniel grow closer, their relationship moves onto dangerous ground and the fragile courage Bianca has built up threatens to fail her. Can she exorcise the ghosts of her past, or will they catch hold and drag her down where not even Daniel can reach her?
I hope that isn't true. I pity anyone destined to meet me.
----
For Bianca Ray, the past is always catching up, one way or another. Now in her third semester at college, it's doing it again. Too much drinking has led to plummeting grades and rising absences, putting her scholarships in peril. When she makes it clear that she needs help—all over the floor of her history class—she’s given one last chance to shape up: seek therapy and bring her grades up by the end of the semester, or she’s out.
Enter Catholic seminarian Daniel McGuire. The last thing Bianca wants is an aspiring priest to counsel her on how to live her life, but the handsome graduate student is different from the holy rollers she fled from at home. Gentle and unobtrusive, he helps her pick up the pieces and find a new way to live: not running from the past, but facing it head on.
But opening up her heart to release the pain means that something else can come in. As Bianca and Daniel grow closer, their relationship moves onto dangerous ground and the fragile courage Bianca has built up threatens to fail her. Can she exorcise the ghosts of her past, or will they catch hold and drag her down where not even Daniel can reach her?
336 pages, Paperback
First published July 12, 2013
36 people are currently reading
2515 people want to read
About the author
Andra Brynn
4 books105 followersI write books. Obsessively. And I read books. Not quite as obsessively as I'd like, since there are all these books I have to write, you see. One day I will take a book vacation and do nothing but read my TBR list.
Friend me. I love to talk books.
Friend me. I love to talk books.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 143 reviews
August 15, 2013
In Japan, they say there's a red thread of fate that binds people who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance. It may tangle, it may knot. it may stretch or fray, but it will never break. It is a future as indelible as the past.
This was not an easy book to read, I must say. The main character Bianca suffered from such a dark depression, that I wondered if I would finish reading this book. But I'm glad I did!
Bianca Ray
A college scholarship student, who suffers from depression and alcohol abuse. This book is written completely from her POV, I was pulled in by her deep and dark thoughts, this girl does not have any respect for herself or her body, she doesn't feel worthy of the air she breathes. She has this strange obsession with ghosts, I didn't understand why she was so obsessed with ghost, this bothered me in the beginning. But it does make sense in the end, this was a huge epiphany for Daniel.
Daniel Mcguire
A Catholic seminarian (he's studying to be a priest), he meets Bianca while filling in for one of her lecturers classes. She's obviously hungover and when she throws up during class, he feels compelled to help her. I would have loved getting a POV from Daniel, I really wanted to get inside his head. On the outside he seems sure of himself, but as the book progresses, you realise that he isn't sure of anything in his life, he has many questions that no one can answer.
When Bianca isn't in class or studying, she drowns out her pain by drinking and sleeping around. With these two things she doesn't have to feel the pain in her life, she feels abandoned, unworthy even of Daniel's help. She fights with her addiction sometimes she wins and sometimes she loses.
The word alcohol comes from an Arabic word. Al-khawl, which isn't really connected to anything. But dig a little deeper, and you find that the Koran calls it al-ghawl, which means demon. Or rather in English ghoul.
Bianca is a truly and heart-breakingly broken young woman. As I read this book I realised how she was not living at all , until Daniel came into her life. She became her true self when Daniel helped her...
This is a beautifully written book, I actually felt dumb at times as if I couldn't grasp the depth. The romance was secondary, this is a book about overcoming addiction, loss and so much more. This isn't a book I would normally read, but it is about forbidden love, which is what attracted me to it. I really can't go any further without giving away the entire story.
We're stuck here, he and I, between a painful and uncertain future. He is a ghost, just like me.
Read
July 8, 2013This was a book that I've been meaning to write since 2009, when I finally came to terms with a deeply traumatic event in my own past. I'd never read a book that accurately captured the feeling of being truly traumatized by this particular event, so I had to write one. Four years later I am finally able to offer this book of my heart to you, and to all other survivors of an event similar to the one that shaped both me and the heroine of the novel, Bianca. To those survivors, I hope this book helps you find some words to express your own pain, and to find just a little catharsis between the pages.
All my love,
Andra
All my love,
Andra
August 26, 2013
I don’t think I’ve ever described a book as perfect before, not even my beloved Slammed series, but this…this book…it’s really quite PERFECT.
***Copy kindly provided by author in exchange for an honest review***
“And just like that I’m falling and it all comes crashing back in like the bursting windows of a sinking ship and I’m drowning in the terror and the helplessness, the cold, and the despair, and I’m on my knees and I can’t breathe, and I’ll never get past it, it will always come back, I will never escape, never escape never escape, never never never never never never never fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK”
Wow. I don’t even know how useful this review is going to be because, well, my mind is…completely blown. I’m shocked. Speechless. Why-did-I-not-read-this-earlier going through my head so this may be more of an emotional vent than review. This isn’t the typical NA book I usually read, and quite honestly, I forgot my ultimate book boyfriends when I read this book. My three T’s (Travis, Trent, and T.J.) were whooshed out of my mind; heck, I even forgot about effin Will Cooper!!! There was only Bianca and Daniel, Daniel and Bianca, and their all-out consuming story that made me reevaluate all of my preconceived notions I had about this book.
“The strength of emotion unresolved in life can tie a ghost to this world, just as surely as a violent death will. An emotion so uncontrollable that it takes on a life of its own. They haunt the places they died, tied to this world, and everyone who touches them is infected with the disease of their feelings.”
“Ghosts who mourn. Ghosts who hate. Ghosts who covet, ghosts who desire. Envy, greed, lust, unrequited love. Resentment. Loneliness. Sometimes it seems that just about any feeling at all could turn you into a ghost.”
Let’s just get one thing straight. I hate ghosts. The idea is just preposterous. They’re not even real, for goodness sake. If I don’t hate them, I make fun of them. You can probably imagine my reaction when the very first page smacked me with a ghost story. Yeah. Except…I was intrigued. Hesitant, yes, but wanting to know more because of the way Andra weaved it into the story. To see what made this Bianca chick tick. And then, HOLY HELL!!! Let’s just say I will NEVER see ghosts the same way again nor will I make fun of them. Andra has this special writing style that just sucks you in like a hurricane. It had a mix of Colleen Hoover and J.M. Darhower, but her voice is completely fresh, unique, incredibly attention-grabbing, and her own. It’s just…really hard to explain. Either way, it takes A LOT for me to read about ghosts when I effin hate them, erm, used to hate, so that says something about Andra’s writing.
“I am everyone’s bad example, the horrible warning that they can avoid if they’re good enough, strong enough, believe in God, give money to hobos, pet kittens. I mean, I must have done something. And I have. I’ve drunk a shit ton of alcohol. But they never think, Where did it start? They never think, Would I do it too, if I knew the same things?”
Bianca (let’s just go with this name) Ray is a college scholarship student who suffers from extreme depression and alcohol abuse. She drowns out her sorrows with drinking and sleeping around with guys, and though this type of heroine is quite common in books, her pain stemmed from a completely different aspect that I’ve never read about before. For one, I could never put my finger down on exactly what she was running from. Was it her mother? Parental abuse? Father issues? Some kind of traumatic event? Turns out it was a combination of all of the above. And I didn’t even realize it until she actually blurted the truth out to Daniel. Just when I thought I was done with the ghost talk, then BAM!! I was just amazed at how shocked I was. The pieces all started to fit together and the truth, the real truth, slammed into me so hard my heart flew up to my throat.
“Just imagine dying, especially after a violent death. The pain’s been arcing through you, burning away your rational thought, fear clawing your sanity to shreds, and then…bliss. Peace. No more pain. No more worries. No more money troubles, or broken hearts. No more painful memories. All of that gone.”
“You have escaped the bonds of your body, slipped free of its vagaries and lusts and hurts and needs. Then you open your ethereal eyes, and everything is exactly the same.”
“Oh no, you’d think. Not this shit again.”
Can you imagine that pain, that anguish? To think that you finally are released from all your worries, all sorrows, only to open your eyes to see it in front of you, taunting you? God, Bianca…I am not ashamed to say that I cried lots for her. Big, fat, ugly tears. With snot.
“Daniel is really hot, but to me it’s sort of overshadowed by his personality, which is…almost odd, because if there’s anything Daniel seems like, it’s gentle. He’s gentle in spirit. He’s not hard like me, not full of nails and bile. He’s just sweet, and kind, and a good person.”
That is actually a perfect description of Daniel. Oh, and he’s a priest-in-training. That was in the blurb, but silly me didn’t read that so I was pleasantly surprised when Daniel admitted his soon-to-be occupation. I actually giggled, no hooted, with laughter alongside Bianca because, well, it’s just so darn funny. Talk about opposites attracting each other! Daniel is such a refreshing character to read about and I had this strange notion to protect him, to shield him from all the badness in the world. Not sure how I’m going to fit his name into ultimate book boyfriend hall with my three T’s but I’ll work that out.
One more thing!! I couldn’t just leave this review without mentioning humor!! For such a somber tale, the little snippets of funniness really brightened my day. I just LOVE the banter between Bianca and Daniel and holy schmolies, only Andra could make the seven deadly sins into something hilarious. Is there anything this woman can’t do??!!
“You just drank the sauce?”
“Why not? I paid for it. It tastes good. I’m not going to let it go to waste. That’s…I’m sure that’s some kind of sin.”
“Yeah, but drinking it was gluttony.”
“Wrath. I’m feeling wrath right now.”
“Pride.”
“Sloth.”
“Sloth?”
“I had the impulse to slap you silly, but I was too lazy to do it.”
“You’d slap this sweet face?”
“You really are full of pride.”
*Sigh* I really didn’t want this book to end, and though the ending left me secure and satisfied, I sincerely hope that Andra writes a sequel, or companion novel to follow this one. I’ll even settle for an extra chapter!!! Or a Daniel POV scene? This book, hands down, definitely made my list of best books of 2013.
***5+++++ PHENOMENAL STARS!!!!!***
Side note: I was listening to Heartbreaker-Abbi Glines when reading most of this book. It’s weird, listening to one author’s book song for another book, but I thought the song really captured the tone and mood of this book!
***Copy kindly provided by author in exchange for an honest review***
“And just like that I’m falling and it all comes crashing back in like the bursting windows of a sinking ship and I’m drowning in the terror and the helplessness, the cold, and the despair, and I’m on my knees and I can’t breathe, and I’ll never get past it, it will always come back, I will never escape, never escape never escape, never never never never never never never fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK”
Wow. I don’t even know how useful this review is going to be because, well, my mind is…completely blown. I’m shocked. Speechless. Why-did-I-not-read-this-earlier going through my head so this may be more of an emotional vent than review. This isn’t the typical NA book I usually read, and quite honestly, I forgot my ultimate book boyfriends when I read this book. My three T’s (Travis, Trent, and T.J.) were whooshed out of my mind; heck, I even forgot about effin Will Cooper!!! There was only Bianca and Daniel, Daniel and Bianca, and their all-out consuming story that made me reevaluate all of my preconceived notions I had about this book.
“The strength of emotion unresolved in life can tie a ghost to this world, just as surely as a violent death will. An emotion so uncontrollable that it takes on a life of its own. They haunt the places they died, tied to this world, and everyone who touches them is infected with the disease of their feelings.”
“Ghosts who mourn. Ghosts who hate. Ghosts who covet, ghosts who desire. Envy, greed, lust, unrequited love. Resentment. Loneliness. Sometimes it seems that just about any feeling at all could turn you into a ghost.”
Let’s just get one thing straight. I hate ghosts. The idea is just preposterous. They’re not even real, for goodness sake. If I don’t hate them, I make fun of them. You can probably imagine my reaction when the very first page smacked me with a ghost story. Yeah. Except…I was intrigued. Hesitant, yes, but wanting to know more because of the way Andra weaved it into the story. To see what made this Bianca chick tick. And then, HOLY HELL!!! Let’s just say I will NEVER see ghosts the same way again nor will I make fun of them. Andra has this special writing style that just sucks you in like a hurricane. It had a mix of Colleen Hoover and J.M. Darhower, but her voice is completely fresh, unique, incredibly attention-grabbing, and her own. It’s just…really hard to explain. Either way, it takes A LOT for me to read about ghosts when I effin hate them, erm, used to hate, so that says something about Andra’s writing.
“I am everyone’s bad example, the horrible warning that they can avoid if they’re good enough, strong enough, believe in God, give money to hobos, pet kittens. I mean, I must have done something. And I have. I’ve drunk a shit ton of alcohol. But they never think, Where did it start? They never think, Would I do it too, if I knew the same things?”
Bianca (let’s just go with this name) Ray is a college scholarship student who suffers from extreme depression and alcohol abuse. She drowns out her sorrows with drinking and sleeping around with guys, and though this type of heroine is quite common in books, her pain stemmed from a completely different aspect that I’ve never read about before. For one, I could never put my finger down on exactly what she was running from. Was it her mother? Parental abuse? Father issues? Some kind of traumatic event? Turns out it was a combination of all of the above. And I didn’t even realize it until she actually blurted the truth out to Daniel. Just when I thought I was done with the ghost talk, then BAM!! I was just amazed at how shocked I was. The pieces all started to fit together and the truth, the real truth, slammed into me so hard my heart flew up to my throat.
“Just imagine dying, especially after a violent death. The pain’s been arcing through you, burning away your rational thought, fear clawing your sanity to shreds, and then…bliss. Peace. No more pain. No more worries. No more money troubles, or broken hearts. No more painful memories. All of that gone.”
“You have escaped the bonds of your body, slipped free of its vagaries and lusts and hurts and needs. Then you open your ethereal eyes, and everything is exactly the same.”
“Oh no, you’d think. Not this shit again.”
Can you imagine that pain, that anguish? To think that you finally are released from all your worries, all sorrows, only to open your eyes to see it in front of you, taunting you? God, Bianca…I am not ashamed to say that I cried lots for her. Big, fat, ugly tears. With snot.
“Daniel is really hot, but to me it’s sort of overshadowed by his personality, which is…almost odd, because if there’s anything Daniel seems like, it’s gentle. He’s gentle in spirit. He’s not hard like me, not full of nails and bile. He’s just sweet, and kind, and a good person.”
That is actually a perfect description of Daniel. Oh, and he’s a priest-in-training. That was in the blurb, but silly me didn’t read that so I was pleasantly surprised when Daniel admitted his soon-to-be occupation. I actually giggled, no hooted, with laughter alongside Bianca because, well, it’s just so darn funny. Talk about opposites attracting each other! Daniel is such a refreshing character to read about and I had this strange notion to protect him, to shield him from all the badness in the world. Not sure how I’m going to fit his name into ultimate book boyfriend hall with my three T’s but I’ll work that out.
One more thing!! I couldn’t just leave this review without mentioning humor!! For such a somber tale, the little snippets of funniness really brightened my day. I just LOVE the banter between Bianca and Daniel and holy schmolies, only Andra could make the seven deadly sins into something hilarious. Is there anything this woman can’t do??!!
“You just drank the sauce?”
“Why not? I paid for it. It tastes good. I’m not going to let it go to waste. That’s…I’m sure that’s some kind of sin.”
“Yeah, but drinking it was gluttony.”
“Wrath. I’m feeling wrath right now.”
“Pride.”
“Sloth.”
“Sloth?”
“I had the impulse to slap you silly, but I was too lazy to do it.”
“You’d slap this sweet face?”
“You really are full of pride.”
*Sigh* I really didn’t want this book to end, and though the ending left me secure and satisfied, I sincerely hope that Andra writes a sequel, or companion novel to follow this one. I’ll even settle for an extra chapter!!! Or a Daniel POV scene? This book, hands down, definitely made my list of best books of 2013.
***5+++++ PHENOMENAL STARS!!!!!***
Side note: I was listening to Heartbreaker-Abbi Glines when reading most of this book. It’s weird, listening to one author’s book song for another book, but I thought the song really captured the tone and mood of this book!
March 23, 2016
What a shocker.I did not expect to enjoy this, it's a NA, which I've had poor luck with. I was ready to quit at 10%. I hated the MC Bianca, and her drunk, sexed up, sluty life style. She is everything I can't stand in young women. I know that is harsh and judgmental , I feel mean. She is hard to understand at first she comes off and this total party girl lost in her bottle of anything with alcohol. I saw something, a question not answered. Why was she on this path of utter destruction ?
The author did a fabulous job of making me want the answers without sticking the question right in my face. Her story slowly unwinds just a bit at a time, it's so well done you don't even know you're being hooked. I had to follow the tale, then I started to feel for her, hate, disgust, pity and finally hope. She did the same with the male MC, while he was likable in the beginning I didn't know where he from coming from till almost the end. What a weaver of words Ms Brynn is.
The story was kind of silly in my humble opinion, girl on path of destruction meets man that saves her from herself and changes his life forever. There is a smack you upside the head revelation about Daniel that I never saw coming.This changed the whole view of the characters. Finally an author who understands that, such a big revelation would change attitudes. The end, I saw coming from the 50% point in the book but ti wasn't about the end it was about the journey of these two. Life's pain sticks, alters and doesn't just disappear.
Excellent character development, great pacing, and suspense.
I loved the writing and can't wait for more from Ms. Brynn
The author did a fabulous job of making me want the answers without sticking the question right in my face. Her story slowly unwinds just a bit at a time, it's so well done you don't even know you're being hooked. I had to follow the tale, then I started to feel for her, hate, disgust, pity and finally hope. She did the same with the male MC, while he was likable in the beginning I didn't know where he from coming from till almost the end. What a weaver of words Ms Brynn is.
The story was kind of silly in my humble opinion, girl on path of destruction meets man that saves her from herself and changes his life forever. There is a smack you upside the head revelation about Daniel that I never saw coming.This changed the whole view of the characters. Finally an author who understands that, such a big revelation would change attitudes. The end, I saw coming from the 50% point in the book but ti wasn't about the end it was about the journey of these two. Life's pain sticks, alters and doesn't just disappear.
Excellent character development, great pacing, and suspense.
I loved the writing and can't wait for more from Ms. Brynn
October 30, 2013
3.5 STARS
To be fair I thought the writing was inspired. Something that I don't often see in New Adult books. And I really liked the obvious effort to deliver the story in a creative manner. It is quite difficult to be creative in this genre because the troubled heroine with a secret looking for redemption has been done to death and needs a fresh perspective but at the same time you have to meet certain audience expectations. I get that. So A for effort there.
That being said, this just faltered a little too visibly in certain stretches (particularly at the end) for me not to question if all that muscle this showed in terms of atmosphere and insight were all just smoke and mirrors.
It was a lot like watching professional wrestling. All these mammoth men doing violent things to each other. Then you take a step back and you realize they're wearing costumes and spoiler alert, everything's scripted.
Bianca Ray is a college student with a fascination for ghost stories, sleeping around and alcohol. After one particular night of indulging on a little too much of all that, she has to go through the usual motions of hangovering, except she does this in class, in front of the scintillatingly clean Daniel McBride, the substitute instructor for the day. No, not that Danny McBride.
Perhaps in order to entice more readers with the promise of taboo, the blurb already tells you that Daniel is a Catholic priest. Hold your knickers Father Stern Stearns fans, he's an aspiring Catholic priest with a background in counseling and conveniently enough, photography, who wants to help the beautiful troubled girl shrouded in mysterious mysteries. I'm not sure why this was offered in the blurb when this was drawn out as an annoying non-mystery for the entire first half of this book.
Anyway, I'm being irreverently glib when I was really quite impressed with a lot of the insights this book had to offer, particularly on faith. I loved the conflict that was enfolded in Daniel's character, they were quite beautiful without getting preachy and definitely something you don't see in this genre often. I did like some aspects in Bianca's character, I never felt like I was being manipulated to like her for being this strong proto-feminist even if she does come across as one.
I liked that the characters and the college lifestyle were given great depth and authenticity. It made me miss my 20s (thanks book O_O).
One may expect this to have some student-teacher dynamic but it really didn't. Instead a lot of the scenes took place with Bianca and Daniel forging a comfortable friendship by going into these urban explorations which felt a little forced and convenient for me. Of course this provided a unique set up for all that wonderful atmosphere of decay and neglect. It did provide the proper ambience for Bianca's ghost stories and gives a jarring feel when you shift back to all those seemingly out of place snippets in between chapters about Tantalus and Norse mythology and metaphorical soliloquies which were simultaneously intriguing and annoying because it felt a lot like literary preening.
But all of this sits on the foundations of a weak and recycled storyline which was supposedly hinged on the overused conflict of the bad girl not deserving the good guy and a plot twist that when expanded on after its reveal was a disappointment. There was no heft in the plot to back up all that beautiful insight and I often caught myself being amazed over all that depressive, alcoholic literary porn:
And eye rolling over the outright, generic cheese porn New Adult as a genre loves to indulge in.
I'm sorry if I'm coming off a romance grinch but I don't care if it was in-character for Daniel since he's aspiring to be a priest (and you know how us Catholics love our theatrics), that dialogue could've been handled in a manner that didn't make it feel like it belonged to an entirely different book. I'm not even going to touch on the "muscular thighs" and the "hard stomach" descriptives or the TL:DR sex scene but suffice to say this is one of the most bipolar books I've read in a while and the strain to serve one too many masters was just too evident when these things should be seamless and hidden from the audience.
In the end it's still a good book that attempted to break some rules from this genre. It had a lot of promise but some of the pieces in its puzzle just didn't fit as well as it should with each other. I liked a great deal about it, but not enough to not notice the places where it wavered in its efforts.
To be fair I thought the writing was inspired. Something that I don't often see in New Adult books. And I really liked the obvious effort to deliver the story in a creative manner. It is quite difficult to be creative in this genre because the troubled heroine with a secret looking for redemption has been done to death and needs a fresh perspective but at the same time you have to meet certain audience expectations. I get that. So A for effort there.
That being said, this just faltered a little too visibly in certain stretches (particularly at the end) for me not to question if all that muscle this showed in terms of atmosphere and insight were all just smoke and mirrors.
It was a lot like watching professional wrestling. All these mammoth men doing violent things to each other. Then you take a step back and you realize they're wearing costumes and spoiler alert, everything's scripted.
Bianca Ray is a college student with a fascination for ghost stories, sleeping around and alcohol. After one particular night of indulging on a little too much of all that, she has to go through the usual motions of hangovering, except she does this in class, in front of the scintillatingly clean Daniel McBride, the substitute instructor for the day. No, not that Danny McBride.
Perhaps in order to entice more readers with the promise of taboo, the blurb already tells you that Daniel is a Catholic priest. Hold your knickers Father Stern Stearns fans, he's an aspiring Catholic priest with a background in counseling and conveniently enough, photography, who wants to help the beautiful troubled girl shrouded in mysterious mysteries. I'm not sure why this was offered in the blurb when this was drawn out as an annoying non-mystery for the entire first half of this book.
Anyway, I'm being irreverently glib when I was really quite impressed with a lot of the insights this book had to offer, particularly on faith. I loved the conflict that was enfolded in Daniel's character, they were quite beautiful without getting preachy and definitely something you don't see in this genre often. I did like some aspects in Bianca's character, I never felt like I was being manipulated to like her for being this strong proto-feminist even if she does come across as one.
"I fuck up pretty bad all the fucking time. But I don't bother anyone with it, you know? They're my problems. No one else should have to deal with them."
I liked that the characters and the college lifestyle were given great depth and authenticity. It made me miss my 20s (thanks book O_O).
One may expect this to have some student-teacher dynamic but it really didn't. Instead a lot of the scenes took place with Bianca and Daniel forging a comfortable friendship by going into these urban explorations which felt a little forced and convenient for me. Of course this provided a unique set up for all that wonderful atmosphere of decay and neglect. It did provide the proper ambience for Bianca's ghost stories and gives a jarring feel when you shift back to all those seemingly out of place snippets in between chapters about Tantalus and Norse mythology and metaphorical soliloquies which were simultaneously intriguing and annoying because it felt a lot like literary preening.
But all of this sits on the foundations of a weak and recycled storyline which was supposedly hinged on the overused conflict of the bad girl not deserving the good guy and a plot twist that when expanded on after its reveal was a disappointment. There was no heft in the plot to back up all that beautiful insight and I often caught myself being amazed over all that depressive, alcoholic literary porn:
…The future is referred to as being 'behind us'. It must be behind us, since we can see the past. We walk backwards, blind, into the future, only knowing where we've been.
That's what I feel like. I walk backwards. I only know what I've already done. If I'm walking toward a cliff, I wouldn't know it. And sometimes, I think I wouldn't care.
And eye rolling over the outright, generic cheese porn New Adult as a genre loves to indulge in.
"Before there was you, I was in a fog, not knowing which way to go. And then there was you, and you burned it all away.
You were my guiding light when I didn't know what to do. I know that I have a choice."
I'm sorry if I'm coming off a romance grinch but I don't care if it was in-character for Daniel since he's aspiring to be a priest (and you know how us Catholics love our theatrics), that dialogue could've been handled in a manner that didn't make it feel like it belonged to an entirely different book. I'm not even going to touch on the "muscular thighs" and the "hard stomach" descriptives or the TL:DR sex scene but suffice to say this is one of the most bipolar books I've read in a while and the strain to serve one too many masters was just too evident when these things should be seamless and hidden from the audience.
In the end it's still a good book that attempted to break some rules from this genre. It had a lot of promise but some of the pieces in its puzzle just didn't fit as well as it should with each other. I liked a great deal about it, but not enough to not notice the places where it wavered in its efforts.
January 13, 2014
****4.5 Luminous Stars*****
After reading this book I'm convinced that you don't have to be dead to be a ghost in your own life, you can stop living without having to be pronounce dead by a doctor; some times there is pain so strong and devastating that kills the person that you are and forces you to become someone else...
Bianca is going through life by drinking, partying and sleeping around. Her grades are dropping and this is putting in danger her scholarship at the university she attends. When she's given an ultimatum to get her grades up or she'll be kicked out of school, she tries to get help. Problem is Bianca truly believes she is hopeless and her only answer is to drink herself into oblivion, but even that isn't working anymore. So, one night when she's feeling more lost than ever she decides to accept the help of Daniel, because he's not a friend, or a therapist, neither a teacher or a counselor, he's just a guy that for some reason makes her feel safe for the first time in a long time.
Daniel, turns out is on sabbatical from school; he's always been the good guy who does all the right things that are expected of him, but something happened in his life that makes him question his vocation and he's now lost sight of who he is and what he wants. The minute he meets Bianca he's drawn to her, he wants to help her but most of all he wants to give her hope.
Both Daniel and Bianca had been raised by catholic families who were very active in church and this aspect of their lives is what will either make them or brake them. The religious aspect of the story is mostly a fact and it is not the center of the plot, this is a book about two people who feel lost and are desperately looking for the light.
"Until there is no you or me. Until there is no us or them, here or there, until there is no meaning in words, for all the lines have been erased and there is either everything or nothing at all."
I was completely blown away by the writing style of this author, it was so beautiful and elegant that I will most likely read it again just to experience the beauty of her words. This was a story that started dark but ended brightly and I would recommend it to anybody looking to experience a remarkable love story where not everything is what it seems. Loved it!
After reading this book I'm convinced that you don't have to be dead to be a ghost in your own life, you can stop living without having to be pronounce dead by a doctor; some times there is pain so strong and devastating that kills the person that you are and forces you to become someone else...
Bianca is going through life by drinking, partying and sleeping around. Her grades are dropping and this is putting in danger her scholarship at the university she attends. When she's given an ultimatum to get her grades up or she'll be kicked out of school, she tries to get help. Problem is Bianca truly believes she is hopeless and her only answer is to drink herself into oblivion, but even that isn't working anymore. So, one night when she's feeling more lost than ever she decides to accept the help of Daniel, because he's not a friend, or a therapist, neither a teacher or a counselor, he's just a guy that for some reason makes her feel safe for the first time in a long time.
Daniel, turns out is on sabbatical from school; he's always been the good guy who does all the right things that are expected of him, but something happened in his life that makes him question his vocation and he's now lost sight of who he is and what he wants. The minute he meets Bianca he's drawn to her, he wants to help her but most of all he wants to give her hope.
Both Daniel and Bianca had been raised by catholic families who were very active in church and this aspect of their lives is what will either make them or brake them. The religious aspect of the story is mostly a fact and it is not the center of the plot, this is a book about two people who feel lost and are desperately looking for the light.
"Until there is no you or me. Until there is no us or them, here or there, until there is no meaning in words, for all the lines have been erased and there is either everything or nothing at all."
I was completely blown away by the writing style of this author, it was so beautiful and elegant that I will most likely read it again just to experience the beauty of her words. This was a story that started dark but ended brightly and I would recommend it to anybody looking to experience a remarkable love story where not everything is what it seems. Loved it!
Want to read
August 16, 2013FREE today on Amazon US (8/16/2013)
http://www.amazon.com/Where-End-You-B...
August 10, 2013
On the verge of failing out of college, Bianca is faced with getting help or returning home – the last place she wants to go. When she enters his life like a storm, Daniel sees the opportunity to help someone in need, but Bianca is pretty sure she can't be helped.
Bianca is a ghost of herself. She feels alone in the world. She drinks herself numb so she does not have to think and has sex with any guy willing to feel connected and loved, if only for a brief moment. The author does an exemplary job of bringing out Bianca's pain. I have never suffered from depression, but reading Bianca's thoughts and feelings and emotions I felt as if I completely understood her.
Daniel became a quiet presence in Bianca's whirlwind of a life. He is there when she needs him, never saying much, just being her quiet presence. He does not push her to change her life, but rather silently guides her into wanting to be a better person. Though dealing with his own inner struggles, Daniel never lets his smooth, calm mask slip out of place. Bianca and Daniel are perfect for each other. From the very beginning, he is the constant she needs in her life, and she is the chaos he needs in his.
The rest of the characters in the story were a great addition. They were able to contribute to the story and make it better for them being there rather than just being a secondary presence. You don't really think about that much when reading a book, but the secondary characters are very important and often fall flat. Bianca's roommates were a presence that gave her a reason to go on when she probably would not have otherwise.
There was so much depth to this story, and it was so beautifully written. The author has a way of weaving her words to create this stunning narrative. It is a love story, no doubt, but it is not overwhelmingly romance. The elements of dark depression and addiction are much more prominent, and the romance comes to play as a secondary role. Overall, I loved the story and am pleased I had the opportunity to read it.
I received this book for free in exchange for an honest review.
Bianca is a ghost of herself. She feels alone in the world. She drinks herself numb so she does not have to think and has sex with any guy willing to feel connected and loved, if only for a brief moment. The author does an exemplary job of bringing out Bianca's pain. I have never suffered from depression, but reading Bianca's thoughts and feelings and emotions I felt as if I completely understood her.
Daniel became a quiet presence in Bianca's whirlwind of a life. He is there when she needs him, never saying much, just being her quiet presence. He does not push her to change her life, but rather silently guides her into wanting to be a better person. Though dealing with his own inner struggles, Daniel never lets his smooth, calm mask slip out of place. Bianca and Daniel are perfect for each other. From the very beginning, he is the constant she needs in her life, and she is the chaos he needs in his.
The rest of the characters in the story were a great addition. They were able to contribute to the story and make it better for them being there rather than just being a secondary presence. You don't really think about that much when reading a book, but the secondary characters are very important and often fall flat. Bianca's roommates were a presence that gave her a reason to go on when she probably would not have otherwise.
There was so much depth to this story, and it was so beautifully written. The author has a way of weaving her words to create this stunning narrative. It is a love story, no doubt, but it is not overwhelmingly romance. The elements of dark depression and addiction are much more prominent, and the romance comes to play as a secondary role. Overall, I loved the story and am pleased I had the opportunity to read it.
I received this book for free in exchange for an honest review.
June 27, 2017
I was given a copy of Where I End and You Begin in exchange for an honest review.
I was absolutely blown away by this book. It is unlike the books that I typically read, and at first as I was reading it, I wasn't sure what was going on but the more that I got into it, the more I didn't want to put it down.
Bianca is a mess. Pure and simple. She's haunted by an event in her past and it affects her each and every day. She finally talks about the event near the end of the story and suddenly everything falls into place and finally Bianca and the way she is makes perfect sense. I loved Bianca, even with all her faults and her disregard for taking care of herself, I loved her.
Daniel is the handsome stranger that is stepping in for a professor at one of her classes on one of her worst days and ends up being a friend, someone she can count on in spite of her own demons. But will Daniel and their connection to each other be able to save her?
Where I End and You Begin is an absolute must-read!!!
I was absolutely blown away by this book. It is unlike the books that I typically read, and at first as I was reading it, I wasn't sure what was going on but the more that I got into it, the more I didn't want to put it down.
Bianca is a mess. Pure and simple. She's haunted by an event in her past and it affects her each and every day. She finally talks about the event near the end of the story and suddenly everything falls into place and finally Bianca and the way she is makes perfect sense. I loved Bianca, even with all her faults and her disregard for taking care of herself, I loved her.
Daniel is the handsome stranger that is stepping in for a professor at one of her classes on one of her worst days and ends up being a friend, someone she can count on in spite of her own demons. But will Daniel and their connection to each other be able to save her?
Where I End and You Begin is an absolute must-read!!!
July 8, 2013
So. This is a ghost story.
I'm not a ghost story loving gal.
"This room is haunted, you know," someone says
I hate that feeling when you get knowing when something bad is about to happen.
Tap, tap, tap.
I'm that girl. The one with the fingers in her ears, eyes squinting and singing something upbeat under her breath because she knows. She knows that the girl on screen will...
But this story is different.
Is this still a ghost story?
Is it still a ghost story when it contains not actual ghosts? Just ghosts of the past?
"I need another drink."
"I don't want to get kicked out of school."
"You can't help me"
Bianca.
"..and here I am, right where you need me."
"I'm not judging."
"I think we should talk."
Daniel.
SUCH A REFRESHING STORY.
I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
That first page took me by surprised.
It left me confused.
It made me curious.
And despite my dislike of ghost stories (read the first page and you'll get where I'm coming from) I became consumed by it.
It keep me up all night.
It made me look deeper.
I loved how the author told this story.
I'm glad I didn't let that first page scare me away because this story is one full of depth with layers and layers of special.
I'm not a ghost story loving gal.
"This room is haunted, you know," someone says
I hate that feeling when you get knowing when something bad is about to happen.
Tap, tap, tap.
I'm that girl. The one with the fingers in her ears, eyes squinting and singing something upbeat under her breath because she knows. She knows that the girl on screen will...
But this story is different.
Is this still a ghost story?
Is it still a ghost story when it contains not actual ghosts? Just ghosts of the past?
"I need another drink."
"I don't want to get kicked out of school."
"You can't help me"
Bianca.
"..and here I am, right where you need me."
"I'm not judging."
"I think we should talk."
Daniel.
SUCH A REFRESHING STORY.
I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
That first page took me by surprised.
It left me confused.
It made me curious.
And despite my dislike of ghost stories (read the first page and you'll get where I'm coming from) I became consumed by it.
It keep me up all night.
It made me look deeper.
I loved how the author told this story.
I'm glad I didn't let that first page scare me away because this story is one full of depth with layers and layers of special.
August 18, 2013
Having usually 3-4 books on the go, I had to put them all down and read this one. Has been rare for me these past months.
This book is going to way up there as my top shelf picks and I can't believe - cannot believe I got this for free on the kindle.
It had everything:
It felt real
You felt her issues
Forbidden (ish) romance
Hot guy (who's actually nice, not troubled for a change)
A love story that grew (organically)
Misfit friends (that were strange but funny)
Great dialoge (fit the scene)
Consistent
And it was one of those books that, wasn't trying to hard to say something clever or too witty that it made your squelch or write in a presumptuous way.
You actually got lost in the story. At the end of the day it was about the story.
I liked the way there was these annecodes at the beginning of each chapter to introduce the next theme of the chapter or the explain the previous. I thought that was effective and interesting. and the way that it just all tied back was - amazing. Ever chapter had a significance
It completely sucked me in. I had to drop everything and read, so I did all morning.
Deserved 5 stars, 6 or 7 if I could give it.
I'm watching out for your books from now on Andra!
This book is going to way up there as my top shelf picks and I can't believe - cannot believe I got this for free on the kindle.
It had everything:
It felt real
You felt her issues
Forbidden (ish) romance
Hot guy (who's actually nice, not troubled for a change)
A love story that grew (organically)
Misfit friends (that were strange but funny)
Great dialoge (fit the scene)
Consistent
And it was one of those books that, wasn't trying to hard to say something clever or too witty that it made your squelch or write in a presumptuous way.
You actually got lost in the story. At the end of the day it was about the story.
I liked the way there was these annecodes at the beginning of each chapter to introduce the next theme of the chapter or the explain the previous. I thought that was effective and interesting. and the way that it just all tied back was - amazing. Ever chapter had a significance
It completely sucked me in. I had to drop everything and read, so I did all morning.
Deserved 5 stars, 6 or 7 if I could give it.
I'm watching out for your books from now on Andra!
November 4, 2013
**I was given a copy of this book, in exchange for an honest review.**
Please don't land blast me especially after seeing all the 4 and 5 star reviews I feel somewhat guilty giving it 3 stars. I really tried to get into it but it took me until 78% to really start to like it. I really just couldn't connect with the characters. I think it was beautifully written and a really good story, just too descriptive making it boring for me.
I dislike Bianca and I can't find any redeeming qualities about her even in a Christian way. She is broken but she wears guilt that is beyond repair. Daniel is a wonderful man regardless of studying to be a priest. It just seems so unrealistic that of all the women in the entire university that she would be the one he's been looking for. Even when they get to know each other there is nothing endearing about her at all.
I feel like the ending was rushed, that is where it needed to be more detailed. I really wanted to like it but I wanted more. I would definitely read more books by Andra Brynn because it was different and sweet.
Please don't land blast me especially after seeing all the 4 and 5 star reviews I feel somewhat guilty giving it 3 stars. I really tried to get into it but it took me until 78% to really start to like it. I really just couldn't connect with the characters. I think it was beautifully written and a really good story, just too descriptive making it boring for me.
I dislike Bianca and I can't find any redeeming qualities about her even in a Christian way. She is broken but she wears guilt that is beyond repair. Daniel is a wonderful man regardless of studying to be a priest. It just seems so unrealistic that of all the women in the entire university that she would be the one he's been looking for. Even when they get to know each other there is nothing endearing about her at all.
I feel like the ending was rushed, that is where it needed to be more detailed. I really wanted to like it but I wanted more. I would definitely read more books by Andra Brynn because it was different and sweet.
June 24, 2013
*** I was a beta reader for this book ***
This is an easy 5 stars for me. I was absolutely blown away by Andra's writing.
This is a slow-burning romance with deep, complex characters that I'm guessing will be divisive. Andra doesn't shy away from the depictions of their problems and the subject matter is controversial, but she handles it deftly. Bianca isn't your average NA heroine, either. She's tough and spiky and very un-needy...on the outside. The settings are gorgeous and original, too, all tumbledown buildings and creepy atmosphere (urban exploration plays a big part).
The best thing, though, is the writing. People often talk about something being a joy to read, but this really was. The closest description I can get to it is that, if Douglas Coupland had written Prozac Nation instead of Elizabeth Wurtzel, it would feel something like this.
It's awesome. it's different, it'll take you by surprise. I strongly recommend you pick this up.
This is an easy 5 stars for me. I was absolutely blown away by Andra's writing.
This is a slow-burning romance with deep, complex characters that I'm guessing will be divisive. Andra doesn't shy away from the depictions of their problems and the subject matter is controversial, but she handles it deftly. Bianca isn't your average NA heroine, either. She's tough and spiky and very un-needy...on the outside. The settings are gorgeous and original, too, all tumbledown buildings and creepy atmosphere (urban exploration plays a big part).
The best thing, though, is the writing. People often talk about something being a joy to read, but this really was. The closest description I can get to it is that, if Douglas Coupland had written Prozac Nation instead of Elizabeth Wurtzel, it would feel something like this.
It's awesome. it's different, it'll take you by surprise. I strongly recommend you pick this up.
July 7, 2015
This book is so unique and beautifully written. It was nothing at all like I was expecting but in all the best ways. This is the kind of story that will stay with me forever. Fantastic!!!
March 5, 2016
Sometimes you have a secret that is so tragic, so sad and horrific that it threatens to eat you alive. Sometimes the pain you feel is so great, that all you can do is try to numb it by all means necessary – sex, alcohol, self-destruction. Sometimes all you can do to stay alive, is not allow yourself to feel. Sometimes what you experienced made you a living ghost.
And sometimes all it takes is one person to make the walls around your heart crumble – to make you feel again.
This is what Bianca goes through. Having lived through something so painful and so horrendous that her heart can’t risk any more pain, she has chosen to numb herself with way too much alcohol and way too many one-night stands, risking everything she worked so hard for in the process. When she ends up going all exorcist style in class after a few drinks too many, she is at risk of losing her scholarship. And that is where Daniel comes in. He is taking a sabbatical from the seminary, where he is studying to become a Catholic priest. Feeling the need to help Bianca, knowing there must be some demons haunting her, he tries to win her trust. This proves to be not an easy feat, as Bianca can be crude, mean and tries to push him away while at the same time desperately hanging on to the hope that he can help her.
Andra Brynn allows us to look into the feelings and thoughts of someone suffering from severe depression caused by an extremely traumatic event. We get to experience those emotions through Bianca. Learning how awful it is to go from a calm relaxed mood to gloom and doom in 2 seconds flat – brought on by something insignificant. It can be a word, a scent, a faint memory. And suddenly Bianca has a hard time keeping her head above water and pushing through without trying to hold on to the only thing that makes her feel in control – alcohol.
The frantic feelings, the panic, the fear, the self-doubt and self-loathing – it was all really intense and emotionally raw. It made me like Bianca, feel her pain, her sorrow, make me want to help her, hug her and cheer her up. It was easy to see the caring and loving girl underneath all the pain and sorrow. Andra Brynn managed to evoke all those feelings for Bianca with still enough humour so the book didn’t feel too dark and gloomy to handle. There were parts, especially Bianca’s thoughts or crude comments that made me laugh out loud and made her character even more likeable.
I especially loved Bianca’s analogies to ghosts. At first it was confusing but once you understood the deeper meaning, it was so very fitting to bring her emotions and despair across. This was also helped by the most beautiful metaphors that Andra Brynn used throughout the book. They were poetic and allowed me to loose myself in the story, emerging me fully in the emotions. The metaphors made those emotions stronger, more tangible. I really loved the way this book was written.
Daniel was such a sweet and loving character. He doesn’t give up on Bianca, doing anything to help her – without any ulterior motive. He wants to be there for her, chase her demons away and allow her to be happy again. At the same time you can tell early on that he has some demons of his own.
But it isn’t until nearly the end of the book that you get to find out what those demons are. Andra Brynn creates a story that doesn’t let up. Although you get snippets of Daniel’s and Bianca’s life story and realize something has happened to each of them, you don’t find out the whole story till the end. It nearly drove me crazy – but in the best way possible.
In the end, will the demons be chased away? Will Bianca allow herself to feel and love? And will Daniel decide his love belongs to God? Find out for yourself. You won’t be disappointed.
Definitely five mind-blowing stars. Andra Brynn is a author to look out for. She most certainly has a fan in me now.
Also see review on the blog on 29th of July: http://thebookenthusiast.net/
And sometimes all it takes is one person to make the walls around your heart crumble – to make you feel again.
This is what Bianca goes through. Having lived through something so painful and so horrendous that her heart can’t risk any more pain, she has chosen to numb herself with way too much alcohol and way too many one-night stands, risking everything she worked so hard for in the process. When she ends up going all exorcist style in class after a few drinks too many, she is at risk of losing her scholarship. And that is where Daniel comes in. He is taking a sabbatical from the seminary, where he is studying to become a Catholic priest. Feeling the need to help Bianca, knowing there must be some demons haunting her, he tries to win her trust. This proves to be not an easy feat, as Bianca can be crude, mean and tries to push him away while at the same time desperately hanging on to the hope that he can help her.
Andra Brynn allows us to look into the feelings and thoughts of someone suffering from severe depression caused by an extremely traumatic event. We get to experience those emotions through Bianca. Learning how awful it is to go from a calm relaxed mood to gloom and doom in 2 seconds flat – brought on by something insignificant. It can be a word, a scent, a faint memory. And suddenly Bianca has a hard time keeping her head above water and pushing through without trying to hold on to the only thing that makes her feel in control – alcohol.
The frantic feelings, the panic, the fear, the self-doubt and self-loathing – it was all really intense and emotionally raw. It made me like Bianca, feel her pain, her sorrow, make me want to help her, hug her and cheer her up. It was easy to see the caring and loving girl underneath all the pain and sorrow. Andra Brynn managed to evoke all those feelings for Bianca with still enough humour so the book didn’t feel too dark and gloomy to handle. There were parts, especially Bianca’s thoughts or crude comments that made me laugh out loud and made her character even more likeable.
I especially loved Bianca’s analogies to ghosts. At first it was confusing but once you understood the deeper meaning, it was so very fitting to bring her emotions and despair across. This was also helped by the most beautiful metaphors that Andra Brynn used throughout the book. They were poetic and allowed me to loose myself in the story, emerging me fully in the emotions. The metaphors made those emotions stronger, more tangible. I really loved the way this book was written.
Daniel was such a sweet and loving character. He doesn’t give up on Bianca, doing anything to help her – without any ulterior motive. He wants to be there for her, chase her demons away and allow her to be happy again. At the same time you can tell early on that he has some demons of his own.
But it isn’t until nearly the end of the book that you get to find out what those demons are. Andra Brynn creates a story that doesn’t let up. Although you get snippets of Daniel’s and Bianca’s life story and realize something has happened to each of them, you don’t find out the whole story till the end. It nearly drove me crazy – but in the best way possible.
In the end, will the demons be chased away? Will Bianca allow herself to feel and love? And will Daniel decide his love belongs to God? Find out for yourself. You won’t be disappointed.
Definitely five mind-blowing stars. Andra Brynn is a author to look out for. She most certainly has a fan in me now.
Also see review on the blog on 29th of July: http://thebookenthusiast.net/
July 15, 2013
I finished reading Andra Brynn's Where I End and You Begin over the weekend and man, What! A! READ! This book is what I consider to be an intellectual publication. What's an intellectual publication? Well, I'm so glad you asked...I consider those to be a book that is more literature than “just another book”. It's not the type of story you can read quickly and numbly. If you're looking for an easy, comfortably typical love story- this is not the book for you. I don't say that to discourage you from reading this one, I say that to encourage the reading of Where I End and You Begin at a time when you can savor the investment of what it is.
Simply: Bianca Ray is a girl attending college on scholarship who self medicates with casual sex and booze and this is her story of why. BUT it's not that simple.
I immediately felt drawn to Bianca because 1) I also love a good ghost story and grew up devouring R.L Stine books b) who hasn't self medicated at some point? 3) I have these flashes of scary scenarios running through my head just like her and this is why:
I think something happens when you've been through tragedy that changes your inner core which I consider the act of “losing your superman cape” and leaves you with a skewed sense of life. Some of these scenarios play out in my mind simply due to the fact that this has occurred to me but mostly because I'm just plain clumsy.
4) I know what it's like to feel haunted. And the worst thing is being haunted by someone else's actions in which you can't control.
I liked, no I LOVED! That this book makes me think. I like that there was vocabulary I had to look up and facts that were real world, like the history of the word alcohol. I absolutely adored that it contains actual literary elements such as foreshadowing. It contains facts about greek mythology and other cultures as well as Christian mindsets which really make you consider your own personal beliefs. But mostly, Bianca feels unlovable and that just absolutely broke my heart page by page. There is witty banter and character button pushing which is giggle worthy. But most importantly her words are just a slice of brilliance you don't come across in just any book.
In walks Daniel and I love that he makes her a better person, that he listens and doesn't judge. I love that he worms his way into her life and she doesn't even realize it. I love that it's not a conventional love story. I love that this heroine is brave enough to ask for help.
There are no over the top dramatic rock stars. No ridiculous sex scenes. No crazy and unrealistic plot twists.
But 89% did make me physically sit up in bed and say WHAT?
What did this book do best for me?
It made me realize sometimes I miss the things I forget to cherish while they are still happening. I've only generally appreciated things when they were over. It's definitely a personal flaw I need to work on. I loved that this book made me fully understand there's a concept called bardo which really exists and I've had a tendency to live in.
I highlighted and marked SIXTY EIGHT things in this book and made 5 pages worth of handwritten notes. It. is. That. Good.
If you don't read and listen to anything else through the pages, you must read .0. between chapters 11 & 12. The ghost chapters in between are full of impressive insight and wall worthy quotes.
There's so much I want to discuss about this book but my urge to not spoil it for you wins out. Worth the price, worth the time, worth a five star rating.
I found hope in the pages of Brynn's book and a desire to do a little urban exploring.
fave quote: “That’s what it’s like to be haunted. You can’t just call it up and anyone who wants you to is an asshole.”
Simply: Bianca Ray is a girl attending college on scholarship who self medicates with casual sex and booze and this is her story of why. BUT it's not that simple.
I immediately felt drawn to Bianca because 1) I also love a good ghost story and grew up devouring R.L Stine books b) who hasn't self medicated at some point? 3) I have these flashes of scary scenarios running through my head just like her and this is why:
I think something happens when you've been through tragedy that changes your inner core which I consider the act of “losing your superman cape” and leaves you with a skewed sense of life. Some of these scenarios play out in my mind simply due to the fact that this has occurred to me but mostly because I'm just plain clumsy.
4) I know what it's like to feel haunted. And the worst thing is being haunted by someone else's actions in which you can't control.
I liked, no I LOVED! That this book makes me think. I like that there was vocabulary I had to look up and facts that were real world, like the history of the word alcohol. I absolutely adored that it contains actual literary elements such as foreshadowing. It contains facts about greek mythology and other cultures as well as Christian mindsets which really make you consider your own personal beliefs. But mostly, Bianca feels unlovable and that just absolutely broke my heart page by page. There is witty banter and character button pushing which is giggle worthy. But most importantly her words are just a slice of brilliance you don't come across in just any book.
In walks Daniel and I love that he makes her a better person, that he listens and doesn't judge. I love that he worms his way into her life and she doesn't even realize it. I love that it's not a conventional love story. I love that this heroine is brave enough to ask for help.
There are no over the top dramatic rock stars. No ridiculous sex scenes. No crazy and unrealistic plot twists.
But 89% did make me physically sit up in bed and say WHAT?
What did this book do best for me?
It made me realize sometimes I miss the things I forget to cherish while they are still happening. I've only generally appreciated things when they were over. It's definitely a personal flaw I need to work on. I loved that this book made me fully understand there's a concept called bardo which really exists and I've had a tendency to live in.
I highlighted and marked SIXTY EIGHT things in this book and made 5 pages worth of handwritten notes. It. is. That. Good.
If you don't read and listen to anything else through the pages, you must read .0. between chapters 11 & 12. The ghost chapters in between are full of impressive insight and wall worthy quotes.
There's so much I want to discuss about this book but my urge to not spoil it for you wins out. Worth the price, worth the time, worth a five star rating.
I found hope in the pages of Brynn's book and a desire to do a little urban exploring.
fave quote: “That’s what it’s like to be haunted. You can’t just call it up and anyone who wants you to is an asshole.”
October 7, 2013
4.5*
First Lines: So. This is a ghost story.
I think my biggest concern is that people will read those first few lines, and actually a good bit of the first chapter, and assume that this is a paranormal story, and it's not. The main character does have a bit of an obsession with ghost stories, and imparts some interesting info on ghosts in general from different cultures, but the actual "ghost" here is really nothing more than a parallel metaphor. So don't pass this one up because you take that part of the story literally.
I already had this book in my TBR read list, but then a friend mentioned that it was available for free and so I snagged it. I'm really glad that I did. I read it in one day, and I'm still kind of reeling from it.
To say that the main character, Bianca, is a f'd up mess would be an understatement. She's nineteen years old and when we meet her, it's clear she's in a self-destructive spiral that it doesn't feel like she's all that interested in getting out of. She's SO broken that I wanted to reach through my iPad screen and just shake her. She's self-medicating her pain away with booze and using one night stands in an effort to connect, if even for a few drunken minutes, with someone to feel loved. She's fallen so low and is so self-deprecating that you just ache for her.
She's on a full scholarship, and the only thing that scares her into some semblance of control is the idea of failing her classes and having to go home. With mid-terms approaching, she can't skip class anymore or she's definitely risking her grades. Still drunk from another overnight binge, Bianca goes to class and throws up all over the floor - in front of Daniel, the handsome graduate student filling in for her usual teacher.
Daniel is kind to her, and offers to help her work through her issues so that she can focus on pulling her grades back up. Then we find out that Daniel is on sabbatical from seminary school. Bianca is willing to be friends with him and begins to open up to Daniel because, as a priest-in-training, he's "safe". Daniel has his own secret though, and the more time they spend together, the more it seems like these two have a shared path into the future.
Bianca is a wise-cracking smart-alec, and often crude. There were several times I wanted to smack her because she says something completely rude and inappropriate to Daniel- who is just the nicest, sweetest guy ever. But then you have to remember where she started at the beginning of the book, and how her behavior is a mask for letting people get close to her. But Daniel doesn't let Bianca shoo him away. He sticks with her, and I think that they are both rewarded in the end.
This story will rip at you. Some of the description was a little bit overwrought, but I was able to forgive it. The only thing that would have made this story perfection for me would have been some of Daniel's POV. I mean, the guy has a major crisis, it would have been really great to "see" that from his side.
Highly recommend!
First Lines: So. This is a ghost story.
I think my biggest concern is that people will read those first few lines, and actually a good bit of the first chapter, and assume that this is a paranormal story, and it's not. The main character does have a bit of an obsession with ghost stories, and imparts some interesting info on ghosts in general from different cultures, but the actual "ghost" here is really nothing more than a parallel metaphor. So don't pass this one up because you take that part of the story literally.
I already had this book in my TBR read list, but then a friend mentioned that it was available for free and so I snagged it. I'm really glad that I did. I read it in one day, and I'm still kind of reeling from it.
To say that the main character, Bianca, is a f'd up mess would be an understatement. She's nineteen years old and when we meet her, it's clear she's in a self-destructive spiral that it doesn't feel like she's all that interested in getting out of. She's SO broken that I wanted to reach through my iPad screen and just shake her. She's self-medicating her pain away with booze and using one night stands in an effort to connect, if even for a few drunken minutes, with someone to feel loved. She's fallen so low and is so self-deprecating that you just ache for her.
She's on a full scholarship, and the only thing that scares her into some semblance of control is the idea of failing her classes and having to go home. With mid-terms approaching, she can't skip class anymore or she's definitely risking her grades. Still drunk from another overnight binge, Bianca goes to class and throws up all over the floor - in front of Daniel, the handsome graduate student filling in for her usual teacher.
Daniel is kind to her, and offers to help her work through her issues so that she can focus on pulling her grades back up. Then we find out that Daniel is on sabbatical from seminary school. Bianca is willing to be friends with him and begins to open up to Daniel because, as a priest-in-training, he's "safe". Daniel has his own secret though, and the more time they spend together, the more it seems like these two have a shared path into the future.
Bianca is a wise-cracking smart-alec, and often crude. There were several times I wanted to smack her because she says something completely rude and inappropriate to Daniel- who is just the nicest, sweetest guy ever. But then you have to remember where she started at the beginning of the book, and how her behavior is a mask for letting people get close to her. But Daniel doesn't let Bianca shoo him away. He sticks with her, and I think that they are both rewarded in the end.
This story will rip at you. Some of the description was a little bit overwrought, but I was able to forgive it. The only thing that would have made this story perfection for me would have been some of Daniel's POV. I mean, the guy has a major crisis, it would have been really great to "see" that from his side.
Highly recommend!
October 8, 2013
This book was a breath of fresh air! Not only was it mysterious and witty, it also had a strong aroma of "wit". And I loved it!
Bianca-
Daniel, Daniel, Daniel...
Words can't describe this man. He is just an awesome character. He is so sweet and always made me smile. He is just so genuine and compassionate, le swooonnn.
The way Daniel and Bianca meet is hilariously embarrassing but the fact that he didn't judge her for it made me love him even more.
The relationship between Daniel and Bianca starts off rocky, but blossoms into something beautiful. Bianca needed someone to throw down a ladder so she could crawl from the depths of rock bottom. Daniel needed a purpose.
I don't think anything more needs to be said other than this is a book for everyone. I think everyone can get something from it. I know I did.
Bianca-
The pieces to her puzzle are scattered all over the place. We don't learn too much about her past until much later. I loved that. The author didn't show us everything and say "Here is Bianca and everything that makes her as messed up as she is."
She was a mystery. All we knew for a while was that something caused her so much hurt, so much pain, that she felt the need to drown it in alcohol. We didn't know who or what or even when. To be honest, I HAD NO IDEA UNTIL IT WAS REVEALED!! I can't tell you how happy that made me. I hate when I can easily guess parts to a story. Not once did I feel that way with this book!
Anyways- back to Bianca.. She is a flipping riot! I love her witty sense of humor. She also is very wise, I learned a lot from her. I loved her ghost stories, as sad and gruesome as they were. I just loved her! Girl crush, haha!
"New starts are rare in this life, and they become rarer the older you get. When you are little and everything is before you, you can become anything, anything at all, but as you get older, you calcify, get stiffer, less able to stretch and bend. Before you even realize it, your personality is a habit. Your mistakes are habits. Everything about you is a habit, and the chances to break them are slimmer and slimmer."
Daniel, Daniel, Daniel...
Words can't describe this man. He is just an awesome character. He is so sweet and always made me smile. He is just so genuine and compassionate, le swooonnn.
The way Daniel and Bianca meet is hilariously embarrassing but the fact that he didn't judge her for it made me love him even more.
"Some people believe that you will meet the same souls over and over again in each life because you were born together from the ether, and will travel together until enlightenment—or to the end of time. They say that this is why you meet people in this life, and they seem so familiar to you. It is because you have known them since time began."
The relationship between Daniel and Bianca starts off rocky, but blossoms into something beautiful. Bianca needed someone to throw down a ladder so she could crawl from the depths of rock bottom. Daniel needed a purpose.
"It wouldn’t have been possible if it weren’t for him. The last minute call from the governor has come through, just as I was getting strapped into the chair, and now I can finally, finally relax."
I don't think anything more needs to be said other than this is a book for everyone. I think everyone can get something from it. I know I did.
November 17, 2013
For more book reviews by Jamie, Dana and Morgan click the link below :)
Reading Eating & Dreaming
*This book was kindly gifted to me in exchange for an honest review*
I’ve actually been waiting to read this book for awhile. I remember when I first saw the blurb and I felt immediately compelled to read it as soon as it was released. This book did not disappoint me at all! I could not put this story down! I was VERY emotional throughout the entire book, so after I read Ms. Brynn’s novel, I decided to take a few days to gather my thoughts before completing this review.
Bianca is a beautiful, young college student struggling with her day-to-day life because of all these constant internal demons lingering inside her head. Her quick fix is to drink a lot of alcohol to stop feeling anything emotionally. For awhile this plan works out okay for her, but her drinking and partying soon spirals out of control. She also has an extremely poor view/image of herself and feels like nobody special, a ghost.
“I don’t have a problem. I have a coping mechanism. It’s not my fault. I need to cope so badly.”
She feels like nobody can completely understand her so she keeps her darkest secrets to herself.
“If I let go, I think, I might fly apart. I see it in my head, my body disintegrating, floating up into the sky, scattering across the universe, until I’m just sawdust and darkness.”
Along comes Daniel into her life. He is very kind, caring and supportive in helping Bianca. The book primarily revolves around Bianca’s emotional stresses but Daniel has some really tough decisions that he is contending with too. Bianca is exactly who he needs in his life to help him move forward in his own. One of my favorite quotes in this story is to Bianca from Daniel.
“You were my guiding light when I didn’t know what to do. I know that I have a choice. And right now, even if it’s the wrong choice, even if I go to hell or have to start my life all over without knowing what to do with it, I still want to choose you.”
Ms. Brynn did a fabulous job at thoroughly bringing every character to life. I was rooting for Bianca and Daniel throughout the entire story to make things work. I am not typically one to pick up ‘ghost theme’ reads, but this one worked out well. I loved the flow of the book, how she paced the story and I really looked forward to reading every ‘.0.’ chapter. I recommend this story to anyone who likes New Adult romance books. If you enjoyed Sylvain Reynard’s, Gabriel’s Inferno, you might really like this book too because it revolves around a student/instructor relationship to some degree.
I give this book 5 COMPELLING AND WELL DESERVED STARS!
-XOXO
Reading Eating & Dreaming
Reading Eating & Dreaming
*This book was kindly gifted to me in exchange for an honest review*
I’ve actually been waiting to read this book for awhile. I remember when I first saw the blurb and I felt immediately compelled to read it as soon as it was released. This book did not disappoint me at all! I could not put this story down! I was VERY emotional throughout the entire book, so after I read Ms. Brynn’s novel, I decided to take a few days to gather my thoughts before completing this review.
Bianca is a beautiful, young college student struggling with her day-to-day life because of all these constant internal demons lingering inside her head. Her quick fix is to drink a lot of alcohol to stop feeling anything emotionally. For awhile this plan works out okay for her, but her drinking and partying soon spirals out of control. She also has an extremely poor view/image of herself and feels like nobody special, a ghost.
“I don’t have a problem. I have a coping mechanism. It’s not my fault. I need to cope so badly.”
She feels like nobody can completely understand her so she keeps her darkest secrets to herself.
“If I let go, I think, I might fly apart. I see it in my head, my body disintegrating, floating up into the sky, scattering across the universe, until I’m just sawdust and darkness.”
Along comes Daniel into her life. He is very kind, caring and supportive in helping Bianca. The book primarily revolves around Bianca’s emotional stresses but Daniel has some really tough decisions that he is contending with too. Bianca is exactly who he needs in his life to help him move forward in his own. One of my favorite quotes in this story is to Bianca from Daniel.
“You were my guiding light when I didn’t know what to do. I know that I have a choice. And right now, even if it’s the wrong choice, even if I go to hell or have to start my life all over without knowing what to do with it, I still want to choose you.”
Ms. Brynn did a fabulous job at thoroughly bringing every character to life. I was rooting for Bianca and Daniel throughout the entire story to make things work. I am not typically one to pick up ‘ghost theme’ reads, but this one worked out well. I loved the flow of the book, how she paced the story and I really looked forward to reading every ‘.0.’ chapter. I recommend this story to anyone who likes New Adult romance books. If you enjoyed Sylvain Reynard’s, Gabriel’s Inferno, you might really like this book too because it revolves around a student/instructor relationship to some degree.
I give this book 5 COMPELLING AND WELL DESERVED STARS!
-XOXO
Reading Eating & Dreaming
April 3, 2014
3.5 stars
Original review can be found on BookLikes.
For the last few days, I've been having a difficult time trying to clarify my thoughts on this book. It's not perfect. It's not the usual type of N/A story that revs it engine even while at neutral, rather it is slooow paced as you're drawn into the broken and hopeless mind of the main character while she's drowning in depression, addiction, and loss of self. However, because you're in her mind, there is a repetitiveness to her despair. I mean, how many times do I have to hear her say how messed up she is, and how much pain she's in? I get it though. That's what happens when you're in such a dark and destructive state and think so lowly of yourself. So I understand how deliberate the author was to portray the main character's downward spiral into self destruction.
I really did enjoy this story though. The writing... oh, the writing. Thank you, reading gods, for giving me some hope at finding new authors to be excited for! There wasn't the usual telling not showing. Hallefreakinlujah! The author can actually write well. *sob* The story, plot, and characters weren't even original (actually, it was pretty predictable), but in this author's mind, her characters had substance, they had depth, they were interesting, and I felt those things. And thanks to the author for not writing about another temperamental, tattooed, violent, motorcycle riding caveman. Daniel is the exact opposite of the popular N/A "hero" but not in a contrived way. He's steadfast, but not boring.
This book was an amazon 1-click freebie that I finished in just under two hours, and before I could even think of what I would write in a review, I had already recommended it to more than a handful of friends. If this author further develops her story telling abilities to at least equal her writing style, then she'll probably end up as an auto-buy author for me.
Original review can be found on BookLikes.
For the last few days, I've been having a difficult time trying to clarify my thoughts on this book. It's not perfect. It's not the usual type of N/A story that revs it engine even while at neutral, rather it is slooow paced as you're drawn into the broken and hopeless mind of the main character while she's drowning in depression, addiction, and loss of self. However, because you're in her mind, there is a repetitiveness to her despair. I mean, how many times do I have to hear her say how messed up she is, and how much pain she's in? I get it though. That's what happens when you're in such a dark and destructive state and think so lowly of yourself. So I understand how deliberate the author was to portray the main character's downward spiral into self destruction.
I really did enjoy this story though. The writing... oh, the writing. Thank you, reading gods, for giving me some hope at finding new authors to be excited for! There wasn't the usual telling not showing. Hallefreakinlujah! The author can actually write well. *sob* The story, plot, and characters weren't even original (actually, it was pretty predictable), but in this author's mind, her characters had substance, they had depth, they were interesting, and I felt those things. And thanks to the author for not writing about another temperamental, tattooed, violent, motorcycle riding caveman. Daniel is the exact opposite of the popular N/A "hero" but not in a contrived way. He's steadfast, but not boring.
This book was an amazon 1-click freebie that I finished in just under two hours, and before I could even think of what I would write in a review, I had already recommended it to more than a handful of friends. If this author further develops her story telling abilities to at least equal her writing style, then she'll probably end up as an auto-buy author for me.
August 26, 2013
4 Stars
The author gave me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Ghost stories usually come in two flavors: violent death, and unfinished business.
Bianca loves ghost stories. Especially the unfinished business ones. And she has a lot of unfinished business of her own. Her secrets make her think of herself as a ghost: someone others don’t see or hear or care about. But then she meets someone who does care. And she has no idea how to handle that.
He is patiently waiting for me to tell him what’s wrong, but what’s wrong is everything, and even the things that are right are infected with wrong, and I feel like, if I tell him, I’ll just infect him, too. So I’m going to be silent.
When she slowly starts letting Daniel into her heart, she finds out that she’s not the only one with a big secret.
We’re stuck here, he and I, between a painful past and an uncertain future. He is a ghost, just like me.
This is a story about wanting to be loved, and about dealing with ghosts from the past so that they don’t destroy the future. Daniel and Bianca find each other at just the right time. She’s alone and hurt, drowning in alcohol and depression. He’s in a fog, not knowing which way to go. They are an unlikely pair, but they help each other in the most delicate and unexpected ways. She makes him question what he’s always believed, and he makes her face her fears.
This story was beautifully written. The author alternated between chapters of the story written from Bianca’s point of view and short inserts where we get her innermost thoughts about her life, ghosts, philosophy, etc. And this girl is DEEP. She thinks about everything, feels everything deeply, internalizes and questions everything. It was easy for me to see her potential and what Daniel saw in her to save. This was not your average New Adult book. It was so much more, and I enjoyed every word!
The author gave me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Ghost stories usually come in two flavors: violent death, and unfinished business.
Bianca loves ghost stories. Especially the unfinished business ones. And she has a lot of unfinished business of her own. Her secrets make her think of herself as a ghost: someone others don’t see or hear or care about. But then she meets someone who does care. And she has no idea how to handle that.
He is patiently waiting for me to tell him what’s wrong, but what’s wrong is everything, and even the things that are right are infected with wrong, and I feel like, if I tell him, I’ll just infect him, too. So I’m going to be silent.
When she slowly starts letting Daniel into her heart, she finds out that she’s not the only one with a big secret.
We’re stuck here, he and I, between a painful past and an uncertain future. He is a ghost, just like me.
This is a story about wanting to be loved, and about dealing with ghosts from the past so that they don’t destroy the future. Daniel and Bianca find each other at just the right time. She’s alone and hurt, drowning in alcohol and depression. He’s in a fog, not knowing which way to go. They are an unlikely pair, but they help each other in the most delicate and unexpected ways. She makes him question what he’s always believed, and he makes her face her fears.
This story was beautifully written. The author alternated between chapters of the story written from Bianca’s point of view and short inserts where we get her innermost thoughts about her life, ghosts, philosophy, etc. And this girl is DEEP. She thinks about everything, feels everything deeply, internalizes and questions everything. It was easy for me to see her potential and what Daniel saw in her to save. This was not your average New Adult book. It was so much more, and I enjoyed every word!
June 28, 2013
I am totally fascinated with novels that reach inside me and stir up my emotions. Bringing flashes of my own past into focus again. The loves, the loss, the trials that have formed me into the being that I am.
These novels are rare, gems buried in the depths of electronic words and hidden, not intentionally, but obscured by the endless supply of predicable works that cause me to fall asleep prematurely.
Where I End and You Begin kept me up until 4 am in the morning. I was once told that a great author always leaves a piece of their heart and soul in their novels. I feel after finishing this book that I left a piece of my own soul scattered on the pages along with the heroine.
I want to rant over how many parts of this novel I highlighted and how the tears flowed openly over heart-touching moments and some that almost ripped me to shreds. Not everyone will be able to appreciate and love this book as I do, although everyone should have the pleasure of reading this one.
Andra Brynn wrote something here that is more than a story, a ride, or an adventure. She confessed, released, and purged into the story a distinguished and enduring creation that is timeless.
I love stories that opens your soul and then clings to your heart… this one will haunt me for years to come.
So, as a published author myself, I do not approach such a dark threshold. I have admiration for any author that does so. Andra Brynn, consider this a Standing Ovation, Bravo!!!
image:
These novels are rare, gems buried in the depths of electronic words and hidden, not intentionally, but obscured by the endless supply of predicable works that cause me to fall asleep prematurely.
Where I End and You Begin kept me up until 4 am in the morning. I was once told that a great author always leaves a piece of their heart and soul in their novels. I feel after finishing this book that I left a piece of my own soul scattered on the pages along with the heroine.
I want to rant over how many parts of this novel I highlighted and how the tears flowed openly over heart-touching moments and some that almost ripped me to shreds. Not everyone will be able to appreciate and love this book as I do, although everyone should have the pleasure of reading this one.
Andra Brynn wrote something here that is more than a story, a ride, or an adventure. She confessed, released, and purged into the story a distinguished and enduring creation that is timeless.
I love stories that opens your soul and then clings to your heart… this one will haunt me for years to come.
So, as a published author myself, I do not approach such a dark threshold. I have admiration for any author that does so. Andra Brynn, consider this a Standing Ovation, Bravo!!!
image:
September 8, 2013
First of all, three stars actually means I liked it. A lot of people get confused that if it's not 4 or 5, it's a bad book and that is not the case at all. It's a great book and it's written beautifully if that is the genre you read in or the style of writing you like. Unfortunately for me it's not. I'll just break it down.
What I liked:
1) The surprise with Daniel
2) The ghost stories inter-weaved throughout
3) Bianca's attitude, but that's a catch because sometimes I disliked it so much I thought about putting the book down. She is very crude sometimes
What I didn't like:
1) There was too much description, which is a funny thing not to like because a lot of people love that. It's just not my thing. I like to get to the point.
2) Not enough action. I wasn't sure if there was really anything that actually HAPPENED in this story. Again, preference.
3) Bianca's back story was fairly predictable. I was hoping for a bigger surprise.
All in all though, it's obvious Brynn has a talent for writing and I will be checking out more of her work in the future.
What I liked:
1) The surprise with Daniel
2) The ghost stories inter-weaved throughout
3) Bianca's attitude, but that's a catch because sometimes I disliked it so much I thought about putting the book down. She is very crude sometimes
What I didn't like:
1) There was too much description, which is a funny thing not to like because a lot of people love that. It's just not my thing. I like to get to the point.
2) Not enough action. I wasn't sure if there was really anything that actually HAPPENED in this story. Again, preference.
3) Bianca's back story was fairly predictable. I was hoping for a bigger surprise.
All in all though, it's obvious Brynn has a talent for writing and I will be checking out more of her work in the future.
Want to read
August 16, 2013Wow!! Kindle Freebie! 8/16/13!!
October 5, 2013
I read the reviews on this (from amazon) during the .99 cent sale. One of the reviews threw me off and because my .99 cent pile ups on the TBR list are a mile long I didn't pick it up. Month later it was free and I tried it.
THE REVIEW WAS ALL WRONG.
Opinions are opinions. I think with the NA books I often look for the 1 or 2 star reviews for more honest takes on books because everyone does 5 stars. This book wasn't a ghost story in the sense that the reviewer talked about it. I was thinking a scifi type ghost love story but this wasn't that. It is a ghost story about a broken little girl that died during her tragic past but - SPOILER ALERT- it is figuratively speaking. I gave that spoiler away because if you are not into ghost stories than it could turn you away from this intense, beautiful story.
I am so tired of reading about bad boys, and bad boys get the girls in the end while the good innocent boys are left in the wings. Daniel is beyond good boy, he blushes. SO ADORABLE. He BLUSHES. I love it. Great book "non-date" boyfriend. Bianca is broken, lost, beyond jaded. He wants to save her, but excellent point made in the book, how can he save her if he hasn't lived, if he hasn't seen the harsh realities of life the way she has. This rattles him, already taken with her, he wants to help but she is having none of that. I also enjoyed some role reversal. Normally you have a male slut with a broken past and a sweet innocent girl there to save him. Not this story.
Currently, as in right now, this book is free. FREE. but I would recommend this book to you at full cost. I believe that it is money worth spending. Different then all the other stories I have read. Stands out, and I am sure I will touch back in with it, from time to time.
Favorite quote:
New starts are rare in this life, and they become rarer the older you get. When you are little and everything is before you, you can become anything, anything at all, but as you get older, you calcify, get stiffer, less able to stretch and bend. Before you even realize it, your personality is a habit. Your mistakes are habits . Everything about you is a habit, and the chances to break them are slimmer and slimmer.
Giving up sex? I just can’t even imagine that. “Do you have to give up masturbating, too?” I ask him.
His cheeks color again and I try to stifle my smile. Teasing him is fun.
“Are you always so crude?” he asks me.
“Usually cruder,” I say.
He shakes his head. “I’m not sharing that with you.”
“Because you secretly do masturbate and you aren’t supposed to, or because you don’t and just talking about it makes you happy in your pants?”
“Bianca!”
I laugh and hold up my hands. “Okay, okay. I’m just teasing you. You’re fun to tease. I tease because I care.”
THE REVIEW WAS ALL WRONG.
Opinions are opinions. I think with the NA books I often look for the 1 or 2 star reviews for more honest takes on books because everyone does 5 stars. This book wasn't a ghost story in the sense that the reviewer talked about it. I was thinking a scifi type ghost love story but this wasn't that. It is a ghost story about a broken little girl that died during her tragic past but - SPOILER ALERT- it is figuratively speaking. I gave that spoiler away because if you are not into ghost stories than it could turn you away from this intense, beautiful story.
I am so tired of reading about bad boys, and bad boys get the girls in the end while the good innocent boys are left in the wings. Daniel is beyond good boy, he blushes. SO ADORABLE. He BLUSHES. I love it. Great book "non-date" boyfriend. Bianca is broken, lost, beyond jaded. He wants to save her, but excellent point made in the book, how can he save her if he hasn't lived, if he hasn't seen the harsh realities of life the way she has. This rattles him, already taken with her, he wants to help but she is having none of that. I also enjoyed some role reversal. Normally you have a male slut with a broken past and a sweet innocent girl there to save him. Not this story.
Currently, as in right now, this book is free. FREE. but I would recommend this book to you at full cost. I believe that it is money worth spending. Different then all the other stories I have read. Stands out, and I am sure I will touch back in with it, from time to time.
Favorite quote:
New starts are rare in this life, and they become rarer the older you get. When you are little and everything is before you, you can become anything, anything at all, but as you get older, you calcify, get stiffer, less able to stretch and bend. Before you even realize it, your personality is a habit. Your mistakes are habits . Everything about you is a habit, and the chances to break them are slimmer and slimmer.
Giving up sex? I just can’t even imagine that. “Do you have to give up masturbating, too?” I ask him.
His cheeks color again and I try to stifle my smile. Teasing him is fun.
“Are you always so crude?” he asks me.
“Usually cruder,” I say.
He shakes his head. “I’m not sharing that with you.”
“Because you secretly do masturbate and you aren’t supposed to, or because you don’t and just talking about it makes you happy in your pants?”
“Bianca!”
I laugh and hold up my hands. “Okay, okay. I’m just teasing you. You’re fun to tease. I tease because I care.”
November 2, 2013
*I received a copy of this book from the author in exchange for an honest review*
This book is like a breath of fresh air after reading one new adult book after another etched with the same theme in the plot. I believe this is the second book I've ever read that involves a priest/minister/pastor falling in love with a fallen (or something like that) woman/girl.
We have Bianca Ray; party girl, drunk every night, fucks every night, has an obsession with ghost stories and still somehow managed to maintain her GPA. I like Bianca, however, I felt like there's something off up till the end when I found out what.
And then we have Daniel McGuire; studying to be a priest, wears prim clothes, hardly swears and is sweet, kind and innocent through and through. I'll put Daniel in the beta-heroes type because that is exactly what he is. The kindness he shows towards Bianca makes me feel warmth all over, despite the chilly feeling I get from their surroundings.
This book is well-written, albeit most of it revolving ghost stories and the afterlife. Growing up in a religious household, I can understand both Daniel and Bianca's point of views in religion. And to quote the words of comedian Steve Harvey, 'Everyone is on the borderline.', where he says that no one is really a shoe-in into heaven. However, I don't understand the whole thing with Bianca's running away from her past. What is she running away from exactly? There are two possibilities and I'm not sure which is the stronger factor. It wasn't tackled in the end and it sort of didn't explain why she started drinking and all.
I picked up this book, thinking 'Hey, must be one of those forbidden love stories.' Boy was I wrong. Yes, there is romance brewing in the air, but it wasn't explored as much as I hoped it would. But it was kind (that's the word I can describe it in) until the end where I was like, 'Wait what? I want more!'.
It's a good book if you can muster enough courage for a few ghost stories. If you're not into a book that's dark, you might not want to pick this up. I give this a 4 star because of the excellent writing and storytelling. And maybe because of Daniel too. I wish there's a continuity to this story where Daniel and Bianca get to explore their relationship more. If there isn't, then it's still a good finish nevertheless.
This book is like a breath of fresh air after reading one new adult book after another etched with the same theme in the plot. I believe this is the second book I've ever read that involves a priest/minister/pastor falling in love with a fallen (or something like that) woman/girl.
We have Bianca Ray; party girl, drunk every night, fucks every night, has an obsession with ghost stories and still somehow managed to maintain her GPA. I like Bianca, however, I felt like there's something off up till the end when I found out what.
And then we have Daniel McGuire; studying to be a priest, wears prim clothes, hardly swears and is sweet, kind and innocent through and through. I'll put Daniel in the beta-heroes type because that is exactly what he is. The kindness he shows towards Bianca makes me feel warmth all over, despite the chilly feeling I get from their surroundings.
This book is well-written, albeit most of it revolving ghost stories and the afterlife. Growing up in a religious household, I can understand both Daniel and Bianca's point of views in religion. And to quote the words of comedian Steve Harvey, 'Everyone is on the borderline.', where he says that no one is really a shoe-in into heaven. However, I don't understand the whole thing with Bianca's running away from her past. What is she running away from exactly? There are two possibilities and I'm not sure which is the stronger factor. It wasn't tackled in the end and it sort of didn't explain why she started drinking and all.
I picked up this book, thinking 'Hey, must be one of those forbidden love stories.' Boy was I wrong. Yes, there is romance brewing in the air, but it wasn't explored as much as I hoped it would. But it was kind (that's the word I can describe it in) until the end where I was like, 'Wait what? I want more!'.
It's a good book if you can muster enough courage for a few ghost stories. If you're not into a book that's dark, you might not want to pick this up. I give this a 4 star because of the excellent writing and storytelling. And maybe because of Daniel too. I wish there's a continuity to this story where Daniel and Bianca get to explore their relationship more. If there isn't, then it's still a good finish nevertheless.
September 19, 2013
I signed up in hopes of receiving this book as a freebie because I was intrigued by the quote about the red thread of fate that binds people together. I was a lucky winner but, after arriving in the post, it took me weeks to begin reading the book because I couldn’t get over the cover. Too weird or not what I was expecting – man and woman? Woman and woman? Woman on top? Ghost and woman? Ghost on top? If this was not a goodreads gift and I hadn’t felt the obligation to review it, I would have never read it, much less picked this up in the library or bookstore. Because of this, I’m afraid I got off to a bad start.
I won’t summarize. While I feel the author developed a powerful relationship between the two main characters, the subject matter was too dark for me. It was a committed investment of my time into the girl’s negative self-talk, bad decisions and destructive behavior. The material was just not of interest to me.
I want to mention that I am a mother of two teens and a preteen. I’m not sure what genre this is (think it may be Young Adult), but some of the subject matter and description (college parties, love scene, alcohol use) seemed absolutely young adult (as in 18 to 25). I bring this up because I’ve read other books from the Young Adult genre that my kids have read and the handling of relationships and love scenes has been quite different. I would not let my two youngest read this.
I will pass along this book to my niece (in her early twenties), who is also on goodreads because I see she has it on her “want to read” shelf. I think she’s probably the target audience.
I won’t summarize. While I feel the author developed a powerful relationship between the two main characters, the subject matter was too dark for me. It was a committed investment of my time into the girl’s negative self-talk, bad decisions and destructive behavior. The material was just not of interest to me.
I want to mention that I am a mother of two teens and a preteen. I’m not sure what genre this is (think it may be Young Adult), but some of the subject matter and description (college parties, love scene, alcohol use) seemed absolutely young adult (as in 18 to 25). I bring this up because I’ve read other books from the Young Adult genre that my kids have read and the handling of relationships and love scenes has been quite different. I would not let my two youngest read this.
I will pass along this book to my niece (in her early twenties), who is also on goodreads because I see she has it on her “want to read” shelf. I think she’s probably the target audience.
January 27, 2016
The writing in this book is amazing and prose like and beautiful, but unfortunately the story.... not so much.
The synopsis of this book leads you to believe this is a romance, and there is a little of that in the book, but really isn't what this book is at all.
Bianca has lived through a tragedy in her life, one I cannot imagine going through, and it scarred her. In the beginning I thought this would be a typical NA book, considering the majority of themes in this genre have to do with a broken protagonist being healed by love. Don't get me wrong, there is some of that, but typically there is a little light in the story.... a little levity, and there is NONE of that in this book. Bianca's coping mechanism is to escape. The tragedy she experienced has crushed her to the point she is closed off, dead on the inside, and doesn't care what happens to her; all while wanting love and acceptance more than anything.
This book feels so hopeless, so drawn out, it is page after page of the same kind of thing. Daniel is a moment of light in the book, but even he has his own demons.
This may be a case of "it's not you it's me", but this book really wasn't for me. The story was too dark and depressing with no light or hope. I understand the authors purpose in showing this side of hurt, what it feels like when everyone around you is living but you are among the walking dead. However, this is a fiction book and I want to find entertainment and enjoyment when I pick up a book.
The only reason I gave the 2 star review is the writing is superb. I would read something else by this author, if the story where different..... I think.
The synopsis of this book leads you to believe this is a romance, and there is a little of that in the book, but really isn't what this book is at all.
Bianca has lived through a tragedy in her life, one I cannot imagine going through, and it scarred her. In the beginning I thought this would be a typical NA book, considering the majority of themes in this genre have to do with a broken protagonist being healed by love. Don't get me wrong, there is some of that, but typically there is a little light in the story.... a little levity, and there is NONE of that in this book. Bianca's coping mechanism is to escape. The tragedy she experienced has crushed her to the point she is closed off, dead on the inside, and doesn't care what happens to her; all while wanting love and acceptance more than anything.
This book feels so hopeless, so drawn out, it is page after page of the same kind of thing. Daniel is a moment of light in the book, but even he has his own demons.
This may be a case of "it's not you it's me", but this book really wasn't for me. The story was too dark and depressing with no light or hope. I understand the authors purpose in showing this side of hurt, what it feels like when everyone around you is living but you are among the walking dead. However, this is a fiction book and I want to find entertainment and enjoyment when I pick up a book.
The only reason I gave the 2 star review is the writing is superb. I would read something else by this author, if the story where different..... I think.
October 6, 2013
There are few times when a book is so utterly good it pulls you in, where you connect with the characters- their pain is your pain this is one of those books. The story of Bianca Ray is one of full of ghosts- ghosts of the past that haunt the present and may not let her have a future. Bianca survives on auto pilot feeling nothing, merely existing in a haze of alcohol and meaningless sex. College is her only escape from her former life. When her scholarship is threatened, she is forced to make a change in her life, seek counseling or kiss college goodbye. Catholic seminarian Daniel McGuire sees Bianca at her lowest and offers his help. The question is does Bianca want his help or is he merely as all those before him who have tried to fix a broken girl? Their relationship is not an easy one everyday is a struggle for Bianca and she doesn't understand Daniel's desire to help her. My heart ached for Bianca- her pain and use of alcohol to numb it. As they spend more time together, Bianca finds it easier to be with Daniel because of his impending priesthood- the relationship can't be ruined by sex. Daniel was caring, sweet and very sincere. It was obvious he was dealing with issues of his own, but never allowed them to interfere with helping Bianca. I liked the pace of the connection Bianca and Daniel formed and how in each other they found the strength to choose the right path in their lives. The story of Bianca and Daniel is truly amazing, one that I highly recommend.
October 6, 2013
I guess I truly don't know how to rate this book. It was beyond what I expected. At first I didn't understand what was happening until the end. I hurt for Bianca. I wonder myself when I hear of suicide... Why?!? It's the selfish way out; you are hurting those around you even though you are thinking you are making it easier for you and for them. This book brought light to how someone is feeling or trying not to feel... I love how the love between Bianca and Daniel took time within the book (although it was only several weeks). They both needed and wanted to find themselves. I wish I could know more about what happened after the book ended... What I would say to a reader... Finish this book. At times I had a difficult time but it all came together beautifully. Not a typical romance book; this was real.
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