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A Life of Unlearning - a journey to find the truth
Can you be Christian and Gay…? In Life of Unlearning Author, Anthony Venn-Brown gives us a behind the scenes account of what it was like to be a high profile preacher, who, believing being gay made him unacceptable to God and others, struggles to resolve his homosexuality and his Christian beliefs. Anthony gives us a heartfelt account of a man searching for authenticity and a resolution to leading a fulfilling life.
397 pages, Paperback
First published May 31, 2004
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
October 1, 2007
Readers who strictly adhere to homophobic religious doctrines probably won't make it past his first sexual experience, and almost certainly won't be converted to his liberal view. Snarky atheists will hate the book for Venn-Brown's insistence on faith despite his falling out with his church. People inbetween might really get something out of this - it touches on homosexuality in the developmental stage, how social pressure effects developmental mindset, gives a pretty detailed case of hostile religious reaction to a believer who comes out (rather than to an outsider), survivor-guilt with the HIV crisis, and (my greatest point of curiosity) how a gay man could marry and foster a family. I'm heterosexual and picked this up because I have several homosexual friends who I've tried to support through awful family crises, but have always felt inept. I don't have their experiences of bigotry to sympathize from, just a general humanity. I want to be a better friend to them. While I found most of Venn-Brown's descriptions of homosexual experiences cliche and trashy (except his first experience as a boy, which was exceptionally relatable), by the end of the book he managed to dispell some of my culturally engendered discomfort with the practice of homosexuality that a lot of people who are tolerant of the mere concept feel and hide with humor or denial. Any heterosexual person who can make it fifty pages into this book ought to finish it just to expand their tolerance, as this invaluable. Venn-Brown accomplishes this primarily by taking us on a detailed account of the events and people of his life, which is storied enough that it ought to have some part relatable to anyone. There are some jagged edges (there isn't nearly enough sympathy for his wife, and his abusive relationship with one particular needed much more explanation for me to even understand why he'd see such a person, let alone keep going back to him), but particularly in the second half of the book, he hits a very good stride in describing his own development. There are also many sentences or paragraphs that reference very interesting-sounding stuff and are frustrating when you realize they won't be explained or expounded on (being psychonanalyzed by an atheist in the military while suppressing his homosexuality really sounded like it should have been a chapter), while other parts seem unnecessarily long. But these shortcomings can't detract from the aggregate experience of reading a sensitive, spiritual, well-meaning human being's life.
June 15, 2011
A deeply personal book, touching for anyone who has struggled to find their true self in spite of indoctrination. I recommend this to anyone wanting to understand the turmoil of someone grappling with sexuality and religion.
April 2, 2022
This is a raw, poignant and at times excruciatingly honest memoir. Anthony Venn-Brown details his inner struggle with his gay attraction and the demands of conservative theology and institutional power. It would be easy to say that things have improved across many churches and that a gay Christian need not suffer such agonies today. The reality is that most churches are deeply unsafe for LGBT people. So what then to do when God calls you to ministry? Anthony offers an inspiring insight into the obstacles and provides pathways for churches brave enough to follow them. He also offers a clarion call for LGBTI people of faith to express their own identities with clarity and no longer to suppress the gifts God has given them.
January 23, 2016
In April of 2007 I met Anthony Venn Brown at the Ex-Gay Survivors Conference at the University of California in Irvine, California. Anthony traveled from Australia to be present for this Historic Conference. It was during this Conference that Darlene Bogle, Michael Bussee and Jeremy Marks, all former Exodus leaders, made a historic public apology to the LGBT community. I began to learn about Anthony’s story of how as a long time Assembly of God Evangelist he came to a point he could no longer deny his true sexual orientation and with a great pain came out to his family and church in 1991. By 2004 he was reaching out to others who had suffered the same hurt and rejection from the church and society. With complete transparency he told his personal story in his first edition that he wrote in 2004 of A Life of Unlearning-Coming out of the church, One Man's Struggle. When I met him at the 2007 Ex-Gay Survivors Conference he had just released his second edition of A Life of Unlearning - a Journey to Find the Truth. As we had lunch together one day during the Conference,
I shared my story of being a Fundamentalist Baptist Pastor for 25 years and how I chose to walk away from my ministry and start living my life as a gay man rather than stay and bring greater harm to my church and family. I also told him that I had lost all of “my friends.” The only person who understood was my dear wife, Joyce. She had seen me fight my battle to find healing for 16 years and finally fail. She did not condemn me but continued to love me and pray for me. Anthony totally identified with this which I will let him tell you for himself in his book. Hearing my tale, Anthony with compassion and understanding ministered to me as he saw how wounded I was and insisted on giving me a copy of his newly released second edition.
His integrity and complete honesty in searching for the God of love and grace for himself and the rest of our LGBT brothers and sisters was healing and uplifting at the same time. We have kept in touch through the years and once again connected at The Evangelical Network Conference in 2009 in Phoenix, AZ. I have followed his ministry and rejoiced in how God has used him in so many lives including mine. Last year he released his third edition of his amazing book, “A Life Of Unlearning-A Preacher’s struggle with his Homosexuality, Church and Faith.” I read a copy that my ministry partner had purchased and was again so moved I had to have my own and immediately sent off an order to Amazon. It was wonderful to see in print an update to the present time of how God continues using His servant, Anthony Venn Brown. I cherish his final statement, “GOD, I LOVE MY TRIBE.” I bear witness that I have seen him live out that love unconditionally.
I shared my story of being a Fundamentalist Baptist Pastor for 25 years and how I chose to walk away from my ministry and start living my life as a gay man rather than stay and bring greater harm to my church and family. I also told him that I had lost all of “my friends.” The only person who understood was my dear wife, Joyce. She had seen me fight my battle to find healing for 16 years and finally fail. She did not condemn me but continued to love me and pray for me. Anthony totally identified with this which I will let him tell you for himself in his book. Hearing my tale, Anthony with compassion and understanding ministered to me as he saw how wounded I was and insisted on giving me a copy of his newly released second edition.
His integrity and complete honesty in searching for the God of love and grace for himself and the rest of our LGBT brothers and sisters was healing and uplifting at the same time. We have kept in touch through the years and once again connected at The Evangelical Network Conference in 2009 in Phoenix, AZ. I have followed his ministry and rejoiced in how God has used him in so many lives including mine. Last year he released his third edition of his amazing book, “A Life Of Unlearning-A Preacher’s struggle with his Homosexuality, Church and Faith.” I read a copy that my ministry partner had purchased and was again so moved I had to have my own and immediately sent off an order to Amazon. It was wonderful to see in print an update to the present time of how God continues using His servant, Anthony Venn Brown. I cherish his final statement, “GOD, I LOVE MY TRIBE.” I bear witness that I have seen him live out that love unconditionally.
July 12, 2019
Fantastic book.
Very personal and intimate story that brings to light the struggle so many LGBT Christians face. I can personally relate to much of Anthony's journey as I struggled with fundamentalist Christianity (we actually attended the same church in the 80s!) and submitted to years of conversion therapy.
Highly recommended!
Very personal and intimate story that brings to light the struggle so many LGBT Christians face. I can personally relate to much of Anthony's journey as I struggled with fundamentalist Christianity (we actually attended the same church in the 80s!) and submitted to years of conversion therapy.
Highly recommended!
April 19, 2022
This is an amazing book for anyone who has struggled with same sex attraction. I read the first edition a few years ago and decided earlier this year to read the new edition.
I have to admit it was like reading a new book for the first time. Some times I was laughing, sometimes feeling sad and others just welling up with tears.
I was a Pentecostal Pastor in the late 80's and early 90's and went through similar pain as Anthony did, loosing my family and my church and living in so much guilt and depression.
Anthony shows in this book the hurt that fundamental Christianity can cause and does cause but at the same time he comes to the final understanding that he can still be used by God to help and support people from faith backgrounds who are struggling in the way that he did.
His dialogue with churches in regards to same sex attraction is amazing.
This book will give you a clear understanding that there is a future after fundamentalism and God has not finished with you yet.
I have to admit it was like reading a new book for the first time. Some times I was laughing, sometimes feeling sad and others just welling up with tears.
I was a Pentecostal Pastor in the late 80's and early 90's and went through similar pain as Anthony did, loosing my family and my church and living in so much guilt and depression.
Anthony shows in this book the hurt that fundamental Christianity can cause and does cause but at the same time he comes to the final understanding that he can still be used by God to help and support people from faith backgrounds who are struggling in the way that he did.
His dialogue with churches in regards to same sex attraction is amazing.
This book will give you a clear understanding that there is a future after fundamentalism and God has not finished with you yet.
July 28, 2012
Writing this review a long time (about a month) after I finished reading the actual book, although on the other hand, I'm also writing this review after a week at the UCA Assembly, where we discussed various issues relating to what ended up being called "same-gender relationships/marriage". I kind of don't want to discuss the ins and outs of that debate in this review, but I will say this: I really am glad that I've finally read Venn-Brown's book.
I remember when this book was first released. Venn-Brown's situation had garnered a little press, the book got a hell of a lot more. It was a thing - naturally: a clergy-person from a conservative Christian group not only coming out, but coming RIGHT out. But reading this book in light of the UCA Assembly coming up, that kind of wasn't what I was focusing on.
I found Venn-Brown's dismissal of mainline (to borrow a term from the US Christian bloggers) denominations hurtful (as a member of one and adherant of another, technically), although I entirely understand that's where he comes from. (Doesn't make it less annoying, to be honest.) I found his lack of knowledge of mainline denominations throughout the book infuriating, but again, that's because of his subject position and mine. Which are significantly different.
I could have done with a trigger warning in the early stages of this book (damn specific triggers) and I know that doesn't form part of the standard marketing etc: I really do find it difficult. I acknowledge the honesty of Venn-Brown's writing, as much as it hurt me in myriad ways. I appreciate the perspective of a gay male, and particularly a gay male Christian who is willing to write about these things. I still think, however, that the "letter to all denominations" at the end shows an ignorance of the position of the Uniting Church, which although it is far from where I believe we ought to be as a church, is still far beyond where Venn-Brown seems to think any church is at all.
It was a valuable read, and I'm glad to have finally finished it.
I remember when this book was first released. Venn-Brown's situation had garnered a little press, the book got a hell of a lot more. It was a thing - naturally: a clergy-person from a conservative Christian group not only coming out, but coming RIGHT out. But reading this book in light of the UCA Assembly coming up, that kind of wasn't what I was focusing on.
I found Venn-Brown's dismissal of mainline (to borrow a term from the US Christian bloggers) denominations hurtful (as a member of one and adherant of another, technically), although I entirely understand that's where he comes from. (Doesn't make it less annoying, to be honest.) I found his lack of knowledge of mainline denominations throughout the book infuriating, but again, that's because of his subject position and mine. Which are significantly different.
I could have done with a trigger warning in the early stages of this book (damn specific triggers) and I know that doesn't form part of the standard marketing etc: I really do find it difficult. I acknowledge the honesty of Venn-Brown's writing, as much as it hurt me in myriad ways. I appreciate the perspective of a gay male, and particularly a gay male Christian who is willing to write about these things. I still think, however, that the "letter to all denominations" at the end shows an ignorance of the position of the Uniting Church, which although it is far from where I believe we ought to be as a church, is still far beyond where Venn-Brown seems to think any church is at all.
It was a valuable read, and I'm glad to have finally finished it.
April 25, 2016
This is one of my favourite books of all time.
A Life of Unlearning is the autobiography of Anthony Venn-Brown. The story begins with his fall from grace, by having his position in ministry taken away by the Assembly of God oversight, which involved a public confession of his sin. As the book progresses, Anthony explains his confusions and disconnection with his Christian life, and for lack of a better word, gay life style. It had to be one or the other, and soon he decides to live completely in the Christian world. Anthony builds up a vibrant and busy ministry, and is heavily involved in a number of ministries. My particular interest was in the very first Youth Alive rally in Sydney, well worth a read! Unfortunately, history behind long standing ministries such as Youth Alive aren't well represented or documented online.
Completely unexpectedly, Anthony falls in love with a man, and makes the heartbreaking decision to leave his family and ministry behind. Again, it seems his two worlds can't connect at all, but relationships and life get in the way, and there is some healing and reconciliation.
What I loved about this book is that it's not used as a platform to explain away the decisions made along the way, Anthony even goes as far to say that he doesn't want to disclose his spiritual life in detail. Having grown up in different churches and working in ministry for a number of years, the struggle depicted, and the treatment by some of the Christians in this book reads very true to life. None of the 'God stuff' is explained away, and is acknowledged as works of God. And the struggle with dealing with not being true to yourself I can relate to, even as a straight married lady.
For a long time, my friends and I have had difficulty finding anything about the LGBTI/Christian world that is a personal testimony. The closest we have got is listening to the teaching of Sy Rogers, who seems to be an exceptional man of God, but is really over represented by mainstream Christianity as an example of who someone 'could be'. This book was a true Godsend.
A Life of Unlearning is the autobiography of Anthony Venn-Brown. The story begins with his fall from grace, by having his position in ministry taken away by the Assembly of God oversight, which involved a public confession of his sin. As the book progresses, Anthony explains his confusions and disconnection with his Christian life, and for lack of a better word, gay life style. It had to be one or the other, and soon he decides to live completely in the Christian world. Anthony builds up a vibrant and busy ministry, and is heavily involved in a number of ministries. My particular interest was in the very first Youth Alive rally in Sydney, well worth a read! Unfortunately, history behind long standing ministries such as Youth Alive aren't well represented or documented online.
Completely unexpectedly, Anthony falls in love with a man, and makes the heartbreaking decision to leave his family and ministry behind. Again, it seems his two worlds can't connect at all, but relationships and life get in the way, and there is some healing and reconciliation.
What I loved about this book is that it's not used as a platform to explain away the decisions made along the way, Anthony even goes as far to say that he doesn't want to disclose his spiritual life in detail. Having grown up in different churches and working in ministry for a number of years, the struggle depicted, and the treatment by some of the Christians in this book reads very true to life. None of the 'God stuff' is explained away, and is acknowledged as works of God. And the struggle with dealing with not being true to yourself I can relate to, even as a straight married lady.
For a long time, my friends and I have had difficulty finding anything about the LGBTI/Christian world that is a personal testimony. The closest we have got is listening to the teaching of Sy Rogers, who seems to be an exceptional man of God, but is really over represented by mainstream Christianity as an example of who someone 'could be'. This book was a true Godsend.
March 23, 2011
Do you belong to one of the rainbow communities and have struggled to know if God accepts you?
In A Life of Unlearning, Venn-Brown opens up about what happened when his sexuality and faith collided. A former Pentecostal pastor, he was forced into marriage to convince people he was straight, but eventually learned that sexuality is not a choice. He's now reached that point where he's gay and Christian and works toward creating a more accepting faith.
His book is frank and he doesn't shy away from his own flaws as well as the church's. I borrowed my copy from one of Venn-Brown's friends and the book is littered with references to people I know or have interviewed, or takes place at places I've worshipped.
Attitudes about sexuality are at a tipping point in Australian Pentecostal churches and it will be interesting to see where we are in 18 months' time. This book is for people who want to understand what it's really like being gay and Christian.
In A Life of Unlearning, Venn-Brown opens up about what happened when his sexuality and faith collided. A former Pentecostal pastor, he was forced into marriage to convince people he was straight, but eventually learned that sexuality is not a choice. He's now reached that point where he's gay and Christian and works toward creating a more accepting faith.
His book is frank and he doesn't shy away from his own flaws as well as the church's. I borrowed my copy from one of Venn-Brown's friends and the book is littered with references to people I know or have interviewed, or takes place at places I've worshipped.
Attitudes about sexuality are at a tipping point in Australian Pentecostal churches and it will be interesting to see where we are in 18 months' time. This book is for people who want to understand what it's really like being gay and Christian.
December 2, 2014
Anthony's book is a brave and deeply personal account of a life (formerly) defined by the rigid and misinformed boundaries of traditional Christian views on same-sex relationships. Having grown up in a similar environment it has taken me many years to shed what I now believe to be inaccurate interpretations of the Bible and the nature of God towards LGBT people. As a Christian straight person I have chosen to engage in understanding what it means to be gay and I am no longer willing to accept the harmful environment that many (but definitely not all) Christians perpetuate towards LGBT people/s. Reading real life stories such as Anthony's has been the most impacting and influential part of my own journey of unlearning. I would encourage you to read this book (and others such as Mel Whites, Randy Eddy-McCains, Cecilia Wilsons) with an open mind to understand the heartbreaking struggles of people such as Anthony. His book is a window into the heart of a man's soul.
July 18, 2016
A heart breaking and inspiring book about a preacher coming to terms with his sexuality and moving from self persecution to self love. It is incredible that despite what Anthony experienced, he has chosen to work with faith communities, to break down ignorance through education, information and just being himself.
For me, reading Anthony's book moved me, earthed me, dissolved me and filled me with determination and love, to refute ignorance and judgement in any way that I can. Coming from a Christian background I found the narrative helpful in validating my own journey, out of repressive fundamentalism and self hatred, to empathy and self love. What an important book, so pertinent for men and women of faith and non faith backgrounds. Thank you for writing it.
For me, reading Anthony's book moved me, earthed me, dissolved me and filled me with determination and love, to refute ignorance and judgement in any way that I can. Coming from a Christian background I found the narrative helpful in validating my own journey, out of repressive fundamentalism and self hatred, to empathy and self love. What an important book, so pertinent for men and women of faith and non faith backgrounds. Thank you for writing it.
September 30, 2019
Anthony Venn-Brown was a successful Pentecostal preacher in Australia. The only problem was that he was gay. This autobiography tells the story of Venn-Brown coming to terms with his sexuality and making the difficult decision to live authentically, no matter the cost.
My life has paralleled Mr. Venn-Brown's life is so many ways so this book was a great confirmation of my own journey. I recommend this book to anyone who may be an Evangelical and who is struggling with their sexuality. It's also a great read for Evangelicals to see the glaring judgmentalism found within the church. May equality come to all churches!
My life has paralleled Mr. Venn-Brown's life is so many ways so this book was a great confirmation of my own journey. I recommend this book to anyone who may be an Evangelical and who is struggling with their sexuality. It's also a great read for Evangelicals to see the glaring judgmentalism found within the church. May equality come to all churches!
July 11, 2016
Anthony shares his story about life in full detail. I was disappointed by the fact that he does not really reconcile his sexuality and faith, but writes off one in favour of the other. For Christians looking for a place to find how to do this reconciliation, I would look elsewhere. Chad Thompson has written an excellent book on this topic with more focus on this reconciliation, Loving Homosexuals as Jesus Would: A Fresh Christian Approach.
April 9, 2007
An extraordinary read. Anthony's journey has been a long hard struggle. He spent much of his life as a Pentecostal minister with a family. He fought against his homosexuality, eventually being sent for 'treatment'. It didnt work, and the story that unfolds when he finally 'falls from grace' is an inspiring and motivating story. As an individual he has worked tirelessly for recognition of same sax attraction from the Pentecostal and other churches. A great read too.
September 26, 2016
An honest, powerful and courageous memoir by ex-Pastor Venn-Brown. This is an important book that cuts through to the painful reality of the many misguided teachings of 'the Church', and the neglect, hatred, and pain it causes to those who do not fit the mould of what these organisations assume makes a perfect Christian.
June 21, 2020
One of the most amazing stories I've ever read.
This will help me in my new "incarnation" as a Developmental Educator, helping youth with disability struggling (or not) with sexuality.
I know where I stand - I stand with them, no matter where they are. No judgement. No mindsets. Just human.
Kindness, compassion and charity - nice one!
You're a top dude Anthony!
This will help me in my new "incarnation" as a Developmental Educator, helping youth with disability struggling (or not) with sexuality.
I know where I stand - I stand with them, no matter where they are. No judgement. No mindsets. Just human.
Kindness, compassion and charity - nice one!
You're a top dude Anthony!
December 6, 2014
This book will be particularly interesting to those from a pentecostal/charismatic tradition. I found it better that Mel White's book which is also very good.
March 6, 2016
A fascinating story but the timeline often got muddled and I would have to sort out what happened where - just could have been a little bit tighter.
December 30, 2018
Everyone should read this book. Gay or straight. It provides a wonderful insight to growing up gay in Sydney when it wasn't at all acceptable to be so.
June 23, 2021
"In any difficult or tragic situation, if you look deeper you may find that you’ve unknowingly been given something of great value"
August 29, 2020
This book was a real eye-opener.
I have been through my own "unlearning" journey, to arrive at a place where I count myself ally to the LGBT+ community.
I remember Tony when he was an itinerant preacher in the AOG churches, and always looked forward to when he would speak at Paradise AOG (as it was known then). He was always dynamic, charismatic and his message resonated. I don't remember ever being told of his "public confession" - I found out about 5 years ago. In retrospect, I presume it was not something that would look "attractive" to prospective converts, or considered "confrontational" to many in the congregation (that's an educated guess, based on knowledge of the workings of the church - my own, and from close friends who worked in the church administration, who, like me, are no longer involved).
This is not because we left due to "bad actors", but because we came to the conclusion that love does not look like what was presented to us. I am now an ex-pentecostal - I consider myself agnostic because I see religion more as a construct people use to attribute meaning for things we do not currently understand - that science will one day explain), and was led to this book through the plight of a good friend who had been through "restorative therapy" (aka conversion therapy).
It continues to hurt my heart that well-meaning (but misinformed) people could inflict so much damage on others, simply because of their interpretation of scripture. I now understand some of the psychology behind that (having a Master's degree in Disability Policy & Practice). So I view it as appropriate to appropriate some frequently used "Christian" quotes, "I once was blind, but now I see", and "the veil has been lifted" to reconcile the terrible guilt and shame of having once supported such bigoted thinking.
These days I work with trans and LGBT people with disability. My personal history provides a level of insight to some of the attitudes in which the LGBT+ community have been subjected. I can only hope to play my part in bringing healing and support to their journey.
This book plays an important role in my knowledge and provides critical information to my "new life".
Thank you, Tony - you're an inspirational and awesome bloke. The work you do, and the character that drives it, was worthy of your OAM.
I have been through my own "unlearning" journey, to arrive at a place where I count myself ally to the LGBT+ community.
I remember Tony when he was an itinerant preacher in the AOG churches, and always looked forward to when he would speak at Paradise AOG (as it was known then). He was always dynamic, charismatic and his message resonated. I don't remember ever being told of his "public confession" - I found out about 5 years ago. In retrospect, I presume it was not something that would look "attractive" to prospective converts, or considered "confrontational" to many in the congregation (that's an educated guess, based on knowledge of the workings of the church - my own, and from close friends who worked in the church administration, who, like me, are no longer involved).
This is not because we left due to "bad actors", but because we came to the conclusion that love does not look like what was presented to us. I am now an ex-pentecostal - I consider myself agnostic because I see religion more as a construct people use to attribute meaning for things we do not currently understand - that science will one day explain), and was led to this book through the plight of a good friend who had been through "restorative therapy" (aka conversion therapy).
It continues to hurt my heart that well-meaning (but misinformed) people could inflict so much damage on others, simply because of their interpretation of scripture. I now understand some of the psychology behind that (having a Master's degree in Disability Policy & Practice). So I view it as appropriate to appropriate some frequently used "Christian" quotes, "I once was blind, but now I see", and "the veil has been lifted" to reconcile the terrible guilt and shame of having once supported such bigoted thinking.
These days I work with trans and LGBT people with disability. My personal history provides a level of insight to some of the attitudes in which the LGBT+ community have been subjected. I can only hope to play my part in bringing healing and support to their journey.
This book plays an important role in my knowledge and provides critical information to my "new life".
Thank you, Tony - you're an inspirational and awesome bloke. The work you do, and the character that drives it, was worthy of your OAM.
January 8, 2019
I've heard and read up on much about Sydney's gay history, but I'm surprised I've only just found something so personal as Anthony Venn-Brown's story. As a gay man, I find stories like this so cliché. I've encountered many men coming to terms with their sexuality. I've met men who have dealt with the contradiction between church and sexuality. But for Anthony to have put it down in such an honest and brutal way is applaudable, more so when you consider it was published during a time when society was still grappling with gay freedoms and gay culture.
I cannot say it is a timeless book because things have changed since Anthony made is gay debut from the closet. But it's definitely a pillar in the Sydney's queer history.
Anthony is a natural storyteller, which is noted in how succinct every word, paragraph and grammatical input had its purpose. As an atheist myself, though, I had to skip a few pages as I couldn't stand the religious waffling, but I do appreciate how he emphasised these parts. I don't agree in divine intervention, but I respect his thoughts. Other than that, it's well worth the read if you're into learning about Sydney queer history, the trials and tribulations of queer people, the cruelty within churches and even unlearning your own prejudices.
I cannot say it is a timeless book because things have changed since Anthony made is gay debut from the closet. But it's definitely a pillar in the Sydney's queer history.
Anthony is a natural storyteller, which is noted in how succinct every word, paragraph and grammatical input had its purpose. As an atheist myself, though, I had to skip a few pages as I couldn't stand the religious waffling, but I do appreciate how he emphasised these parts. I don't agree in divine intervention, but I respect his thoughts. Other than that, it's well worth the read if you're into learning about Sydney queer history, the trials and tribulations of queer people, the cruelty within churches and even unlearning your own prejudices.
Read
May 10, 2019This novel is a solid four. An incredible amount of queer historical information here you won't find anywhere else. I also appreciate the trials Venn-Brown had to overcome for this book to be what it is. But between these two elements I personally found the narrative a little dry, and my lack of interest meant those parts became tedious to read.
I think this is the kind of book that needs to be studied in universities for its historical contributions. However, it isn't a book I'd recommend if you're looking for a leisurely read. Thank you, Venn-Brown, for getting through this.
I think this is the kind of book that needs to be studied in universities for its historical contributions. However, it isn't a book I'd recommend if you're looking for a leisurely read. Thank you, Venn-Brown, for getting through this.
May 3, 2022
The experience detailed in this book is like so many others. A gay-repressed person turns to Christianity in the hopes of turning them straight, only to discover it can’t be done.
Anyone who has lived through something similar finds an odd comfort/discomfort reading a story like this. The familiarity of the feelings and experiences comes rushing in, coupled with a sadness that other people have had to go through such a lonely and self-loathing experience also.
All in all, I was glad I read the book as it solidified a number of firm convictions I’ve developed since coming out and leaving Christianity. However, I likely wouldn’t recommend this book unless to a very specific audience.
Anyone who has lived through something similar finds an odd comfort/discomfort reading a story like this. The familiarity of the feelings and experiences comes rushing in, coupled with a sadness that other people have had to go through such a lonely and self-loathing experience also.
All in all, I was glad I read the book as it solidified a number of firm convictions I’ve developed since coming out and leaving Christianity. However, I likely wouldn’t recommend this book unless to a very specific audience.
February 3, 2019
Fantastic.
Anthony is also a friend. His story has some parallels to mine. While Anthony is in Australia, I grew up in the Midwest of the United States. We are approximately the same age, by a few years. Anthony is ahead of me in years of being out and openly gay. I have only been out for 4 years.
There’s so much I can relate too, spiritually and emotionally. I love the book and I know I will read again. Thanks Tony. Love from America.
Anthony is also a friend. His story has some parallels to mine. While Anthony is in Australia, I grew up in the Midwest of the United States. We are approximately the same age, by a few years. Anthony is ahead of me in years of being out and openly gay. I have only been out for 4 years.
There’s so much I can relate too, spiritually and emotionally. I love the book and I know I will read again. Thanks Tony. Love from America.
November 22, 2022
Anthony Venn-Brown's courage, insight, and strength are evident throughout the book. Easily approachable, Anthony's story takes us on his inner journey through faith and how he came to accept himself. He survived and has many valuable life lessons to share with others facing the same or similar trials to find congruence with who they truly are. If you have the honor of reading Anthony's story be prepared to be challenged and inspired.
May 10, 2023
Anyone who isn’t outraged by the current restrictions on LGBTQ+ language and care for LGBTQ+ people in the U.S. should read this book to understand the devastating impact of homophobia on a society and its people. “A Life of Unlearning” is a brutally honest memoir of a gay preacher fighting for his right to exist in this world. Anthony Venn-Brown is an inspiration to all Christians and anyone who has become disillusioned with the hypocrisy of organized religion. "A Life of Unlearning" will surely be the source of resolution for many LGBTQ+ people of faith. I highly recommend this book!
August 17, 2016
More details and free chapters http://gayambassador1.blogspot.com.au/
Winner of the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Business Association’s Literary Award 2004
Review extracts
“Human stories, like the one in these pages, play a part in advancing understanding and acceptance. It is the story of a quest to find not only self-acceptance but one of the most powerful forces in nature—human love..” — The Hon. Michael Kirby
There is scarcely a page that does not engage you personally.………nothing is held back. Some will find Anthony’s story disturbing and confrontational and others will find it liberating and an example of the triumph of the individual human spirit. For those who want to understand human frailty, courage and personal redemption it is an invaluable resource. I highly recommend it. Roger Fedyk, Sydney Morning Herald Margo Kingston’s Webdairy
‘Ultimately, as the theme that emerges is about being true to yourself, ‘A Life of Unlearning’ should be compulsory reading for every man, woman and child in Australia, whether gay or straight, young or old, religious or non-religious.’ Gary Fishlock Editor of SX 2004
In this well written autobiography, Anthony Venn-Brown takes the reader on a remarkable journey ……. a heart felt story of someone attempting to reconcile two disparate, but equally powerful, elements of his life – his sexuality and his faith. Anthony wonderfully invokes growing up in Sydney in the nineteen fifties and his prose really rings true for a first time author. As our exploration of who we truly are always affects those closest to us, and it is their pain that echoes through this book. Through it all, however, we come to see the essential nature of ‘character,’ despite the dramatic changes of scenery along the way. Wellbeing Magazine.
A Life of Unlearning is still, in 21st century Australia, a shocking and much-needed work…….it’s an extraordinary life story, and ultimately a positive one…….. Greg Spearritt Sea of Faith in Australia
Emails from readers
The final chapters of your book broke my heart! I had to put it down almost every paragraph to refocus my puffy red eyes. I had a moment where something inside me wanted not to be broken anymore. For the first time I wasn't convincing myself that I was loved and valued and that everything was ok. I actually knew it. Matt 22 (London)
.. it is a superb book...absolutely gripping... I didn’t want it to end.. I found it so profound that I have already promised to buy numerous copies for people’s birthdays!!!…...I know this book will touch lives... Steve (ex Pentecostal minister)
It's 6 am and I've just finished reading your book, which I was unable to put down. Thank you so much for writing about your really quite extraordinary life with such vividness and emotional candour, and for the message of hope that underpins it……..Steve from Paddington, Sydney
It had me completely spellbound until I finally turned the last page. You have an incredibly amazing story which has given you a privileged insight into identity issues and belief systems….Peter
I'm 63... I wept as I read your first chapter. I too, have fought the battle. Your book gives hope to men like me.…George from Canada
Your journey has inspired me live more consciously and proudly as a gay man, to do more to help society to accept and celebrate us as gay people. Thank you for such a wonderful and brave book….Adrian 28
The sheer number of people you mentioned that live with guilt, harassment, torment etc was eye opening to me and I am now committed to ensuring an open relationship with my three sons and daughter about their sexuality......Nina USA
I would say it is the most valuable book I will ever read......... I have been in limbo not being able to understand him or what he was going through.....but reading your story has helped put the pieces of the puzzle together......Margaret whose husband came out 2 years ago at
Winner of the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Business Association’s Literary Award 2004
Review extracts
“Human stories, like the one in these pages, play a part in advancing understanding and acceptance. It is the story of a quest to find not only self-acceptance but one of the most powerful forces in nature—human love..” — The Hon. Michael Kirby
There is scarcely a page that does not engage you personally.………nothing is held back. Some will find Anthony’s story disturbing and confrontational and others will find it liberating and an example of the triumph of the individual human spirit. For those who want to understand human frailty, courage and personal redemption it is an invaluable resource. I highly recommend it. Roger Fedyk, Sydney Morning Herald Margo Kingston’s Webdairy
‘Ultimately, as the theme that emerges is about being true to yourself, ‘A Life of Unlearning’ should be compulsory reading for every man, woman and child in Australia, whether gay or straight, young or old, religious or non-religious.’ Gary Fishlock Editor of SX 2004
In this well written autobiography, Anthony Venn-Brown takes the reader on a remarkable journey ……. a heart felt story of someone attempting to reconcile two disparate, but equally powerful, elements of his life – his sexuality and his faith. Anthony wonderfully invokes growing up in Sydney in the nineteen fifties and his prose really rings true for a first time author. As our exploration of who we truly are always affects those closest to us, and it is their pain that echoes through this book. Through it all, however, we come to see the essential nature of ‘character,’ despite the dramatic changes of scenery along the way. Wellbeing Magazine.
A Life of Unlearning is still, in 21st century Australia, a shocking and much-needed work…….it’s an extraordinary life story, and ultimately a positive one…….. Greg Spearritt Sea of Faith in Australia
Emails from readers
The final chapters of your book broke my heart! I had to put it down almost every paragraph to refocus my puffy red eyes. I had a moment where something inside me wanted not to be broken anymore. For the first time I wasn't convincing myself that I was loved and valued and that everything was ok. I actually knew it. Matt 22 (London)
.. it is a superb book...absolutely gripping... I didn’t want it to end.. I found it so profound that I have already promised to buy numerous copies for people’s birthdays!!!…...I know this book will touch lives... Steve (ex Pentecostal minister)
It's 6 am and I've just finished reading your book, which I was unable to put down. Thank you so much for writing about your really quite extraordinary life with such vividness and emotional candour, and for the message of hope that underpins it……..Steve from Paddington, Sydney
It had me completely spellbound until I finally turned the last page. You have an incredibly amazing story which has given you a privileged insight into identity issues and belief systems….Peter
I'm 63... I wept as I read your first chapter. I too, have fought the battle. Your book gives hope to men like me.…George from Canada
Your journey has inspired me live more consciously and proudly as a gay man, to do more to help society to accept and celebrate us as gay people. Thank you for such a wonderful and brave book….Adrian 28
The sheer number of people you mentioned that live with guilt, harassment, torment etc was eye opening to me and I am now committed to ensuring an open relationship with my three sons and daughter about their sexuality......Nina USA
I would say it is the most valuable book I will ever read......... I have been in limbo not being able to understand him or what he was going through.....but reading your story has helped put the pieces of the puzzle together......Margaret whose husband came out 2 years ago at
February 26, 2014
Great Book. I give it 3 stars only because of the graphic nature of many of the sexual encounters. I think for the point he is making through his life story becomes muddled and lost at time because of the way these encounters where written. At points it seemed to read like a steamy sex novel not the true story of a real human. I thank Anthony for writing this though, what a story, glad you made the choice to tell it. I being a straight, Jesus loving, Bible reading, church goer needed to be reminded that wrong thinking can truly hurt and destroy.
May 26, 2017
I met Anthony long before I read his autobiography. I knew him to be a man of integrity and strength in his life and mission.
This book describes Anthony's journey to self-acceptance as a gay Christian man. It is an interesting look at his life.
As someone who grew up surrounded by evangelical and Pentecostal Christianity, I could relate to much of Anthony's journey. The fact that he survived the perceived struggle between his faith and sexuality is testament to his strength of character.
This is a joyful story of the triumph of love.
This book describes Anthony's journey to self-acceptance as a gay Christian man. It is an interesting look at his life.
As someone who grew up surrounded by evangelical and Pentecostal Christianity, I could relate to much of Anthony's journey. The fact that he survived the perceived struggle between his faith and sexuality is testament to his strength of character.
This is a joyful story of the triumph of love.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews