The Incomplete Tim Key: About 300 of His Poetical Gems and What-Nots

by Tim Key

This is the e-version of Key's most up-to-the-date collection of comprehensive poeticals. Everything from the book is contained in this piece of e, but there are also some trinkets and other little weevils involved that might sugar the pill. These, poems (by award-winning Key) are primarily about love, sex, dreams, death and fruit (strawberries, beans etc). This ebook has come out as a sort of accompaniment to the audiobook and the actualbook because, in truth, if you stop and think about it for ten seconds, this is the way that the book industry is going and we all have to accept that and try and get on with it. I suppose, if we're being honest with ourselves, it's probably nicer to have the actualbook in our hands or on our shelves or in a bag full of other books and unwanted clothes to take to the charity shop, but, increasingly, words are found on memory sticks and we have adapt to this and stop looking for people to blame.In case you haven't had the pleasure of fondling the book itself, you should know that it weighs about three quarters of a kilo, has a photo of Key stood on the cover and is the sort of size that would fit into almost all handbags and almost no purses or pockets.

Genres: Poetry, Comedy, Humor, Audiobook, Nonfiction

Kindle Edition

First published August 1, 2011

About the author

Key has written four books. His most recent focuses on the lockdown of 2020. His others are collections of poems and other bits and bobs. He also does other things: stand-up comedy, acting, Alan Partridge's sidekick.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_Key

Reviews

[Samuel · Rating 2 out of 5]

DNF. Although I liked Tim Key's comic delivery and between-poems banter, I found this collection of comedic poetry to be a bit too silly for my tastes and got bored with it about a third of the way in. The fact that I found his dedication page to be funniest part of the book perhaps says it all.

[Laurinha Lero · Rating 5 out of 5]

POEM #1142
‘LONGTERMISM’

Barry went to the shops and bought everything he needed for the rest of his life. The carrier bags were so heavy. He got chatting with Mrs York on the way home and, after twenty minutes or so, the handles sliced his fingers off.

são dezesseis capítulos, beirando uns dez minutos cada. ouvi o primeiro lavando louça, o segundo e o terceiro dobrando roupa, o quarto tirando o lixo da cozinha, o quinto na fila do cartório, o sexto na esteira, e sem querer do sétimo ao final deitada no escuro sorrindo. agora não sei o que fazer

[Kobe · Rating 5 out of 5]

tim key <3

[Stuart Boyd · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funniest book I've ever read.

[Lee Peckover · Rating 4 out of 5]

The more of this I got through, the more I liked it. Quirky, unique and occasionally even laugh out loud funny. This is a short collection (not an anthology) of some of Tim Key's modern and sometimes very relatable poems. I'd happily recommend this to just about anyone.

[Douglas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love Tim Key and his poems, inspired me to write poetry myself!!

[Podge · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is thoroughly enjoyable if you like this sort of thing. There's nobody like Tim Key. I had a lovely time wading through this nonsense.

[Ezri Baedeker · Rating 4 out of 5]

lol.

[Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Surreal hilarity throughout and even the odd poem that tugs unexpectedly on your emotions by forcing you to imagine life in someone other cretin's soiled shoes. With 300 poems and some very lengthy, funny footnotes, I recognize very little of this from his live shows, but it really is just as good in terms of quality.

Definitely found myself trying to mimic his delivery style whilst reading them in my head!

[Jonathon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Definitely a contender for the most random book I have read this year so far, Tim Key's work is not immediately hilarious, but rather the slow burning humour emerges gradually following a reread, or a rethink. Superbly surreal, some of the footnotes are a joy to read. I'm impressed with the lack of tradition regarding 'what a poem should look like' - several verses are perfectly affecting even without rhyming couplets and obvious structure.

[Stephen Pearson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolute perfection. I rate Tim Key as one of the best and most unique standup comedians there is. Playing with poetry, stand-up, an under-appreciated but very prevalent comedy actor, and a loveable and cheeky charm contrasted against the tongue in cheek of being a Perrier Award winning comedian who is too good for his audience and the world.

His live shows frequently feature sections where he reads his ‘poems’ to the audience, accompanied by a pretentious ambient jazz soundtrack as he works his way through a series of generally unrelated observations on life that vary from being stupidly daft, to rude, to emotionally powerful to being damn-right philosophical…. This collection of poems in no exception.

Listened to Tim reading the audiobook which is wholly recommended. Regardless of how well you think you know his act, you will not be able to predict his choice in delivery. Absolutely superb. Rather than a jazz backing, he has a friend of his on the banjo who Key orders around like his puppet to accompany him with improvise musical backings, riffs and fills as he commands, asks nicely, suggests genres and styles of music, shouts to stop and occasionally compliments Joe on his Banjo skills add a unique feel to this experience - you’d think the Banjo would be too jovial for his style of poems and delivery but it someone all comes together brilliantly.

There are extra bits here too as he makes observations about the layout of the text, describes the illustrations, sighs, praises and criticises his own work, adds little extra bits of info here and there and creating movements of humour from simply noisily turning the page.

If I had to find a criticism, it would be that it doesn’t lend itself well to sit down and read/listen to as a novel. The depth of the writing and delivery will be lost on your with just a single listen. But I’m not going to knock it down a star for this. This was never intended to be a novel… it’s a collection of his favourite poems… and yet it’s so much more than simply that.

[James · Rating 4 out of 5]

As we were told in English, poetry is intended to be heard, not read. So it came as a surprise when I enjoyed this book despite Key failing to raise a smile on any of his occasional TV appearances. Part of this was his occasional commentary and whimsical takes on the book itself, which actually made me laugh.

The poetry itself is all right. I think the best word I could use is 'neat' in that the poems are short and sharp and get the point across without rambling, a sort of 'show not tell' for a mildly amusing situation. The problem is they are quite similar in nature even if they cover a wide range of themes, and I can't say any of them are that memorable.

The notes are what made the book for me, vaguely related comedic asides, and I can't work out whether this is 'mainstream' comedy to make a poet more palatable to a wider audience, or whether the poetry is a way for an aspiring comedian to carve his niche. Either way, I'd pay to see 'normal' comedy by Key and not bother with the poetry.

[Nat · Rating 4 out of 5]

Poetry for muggles.

Very, very funny. I hate most poetry, but the way Key's poems aren't like anything I've read before. He depicts himself like a seriously unbalanced Alan Partridge in hilarious footnotes that offer insights that are frequently better than the poems themselves.
Probably best enjoyed by dipping into occasionally rather than bingeing.

A note for digital readers, reading the endless footnotes on a kindle was fine for short reading sessions but slightly painful for longer ones. On the Kindle for Mac app I had serious problems reading the footnotes but everything worked wonderfully on the Kindle phone app, which is how I ended up reading most of the book.

[zcc]

made me laugh out loud in public several times! a couple of bits I didn't like so much - there's a section that is the drafts of a poem which I got bored of, and there are a couple that are, though clearly not ill-meaning, about forced kisses. I like that there is *more* to this audiobook than the physical (with Tim talking to Joe Auckland and describing the illustrations), it's like the book is the abridged one

[Martin Stilwell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Careful when reading in public, you WILL snort. Absolutely loved this. His poems are ridiculously funny of course but the section descriptions and footnotes properly cracked me up as well.

Found myself taking pictures of the poems to share with friends on WhatsApp all the time. I couldn't keep them to myself.

[Sam Sheridan · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book had some high points, but I also felt like there was a lot of filler tbh. In more recent books, Tim Key has figured out more elegant ways to structure and pace his books. It was a bit of a step backwards to read this.

For anyone interested in reading something from Tim Key, I’d strongly recommend He Used Thought As A Wife.

[Claire · Rating 5 out of 5]

My favourite comedian who I have seen live 30+ times and counting. I’m practically his stalker, so of course a book of his poetry was going to get a 5 star review from me. Good fun if, like me, you enjoy a bit of cheeky, foul mouthed, surreal humour.

[Oscar Dent · Rating 4 out of 5]

Simply ideal from the big man as ever. Features one of his poems going through the wringer in writing terms, which is fascinating.
Slightly less varied than some of his other emissions, but still highly recommendable.

[James R. · Rating 5 out of 5]

These poems feel more like little stubs of stories, which are all very short and full of Tim Key's offbeat brand of humour. It won't be for everyone but I really enjoyed this collection and often found myself wishing I could know more than the brief snippets his poems add up to.

[Methuselah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Okay, I am going to fangirl here, but I don't care. I think Key is absolutely brilliant at everything: poetry, comedy, acting, filmmaking. You name it, Key can do it! Just stunningly smart, clever, original, and laugh-out-loud funny.

[Simon Sweetman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dry, dark, funny, weird...

[Tori Coulson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some of the poems were laugh out loud funny but some didnt really even start.

I really loved the revised poem at the end

[Matthew Gale · Rating 5 out of 5]

Perfect comedic prose and what-nots.

[Vicki Littler · Rating 2 out of 5]

I found this a useful falling-asleep aide. No narrative or character development and you're only occasionally woken by a horn/ cries of Horace! I wasn't entertained but I do love naps. Two stars.

[Erin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m still laughing over the ‘Keith Power Conundrum’ section.

[Heidi Gardner · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF. Not funny in the slightest, just really weird.

[Steph Medlock · Rating 5 out of 5]

i love tim key!!!!!

[Jake P · Rating 5 out of 5]

The funniest thing I have ever read.

[RatGrrrl · Rating 5 out of 5]

Strange, bizarre, and amusing poetry read in Key's inimical manner with a little commentary and self awareness, not to mention Joe on the banjo and trumpet.

[Molly Hauber · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyable! I giggled often, whether appropriate or not. Loved the audio version, with tons of extra commentary (or at least, I assume it was not written into the book) and music.