Girl Code: Unlocking the Secrets to Success, Sanity, and Happiness for the Female Entrepreneur

by Cara Alwill Leyba

I am witnessing a phenomenon. It seems as though a growing group women entrepreneurs all around the world has discovered the secret to success and happiness in both their lives and careers. It's almost as though there is a hidden, underground world of power playing females who have all cracked a magical they think positively, they support one another, and they truly believe they can have it all -and you can, too. There is something dynamic that happens when women genuinely show up for each other. When we lose the facades, when we cut the bullsh*t, and when we truly have each others backs. When we stop pretending everything is perfect, and we show the messy, beautiful parts of ourselves and our work that all look awfully similar. When we talk about our fears, our missteps, and our breakdowns. And most importantly, when we share our celebrations, our breakthroughs, and dish on what works. There is no reason to hoard information, connections, or insight. Wisdom is meant to be shared, so let's start sharing what we've learned to make each other better. Let's start building each other up. Let's live up to our potential and start ruling the world. GIRL CODE is a roadmap for female entrepreneurs, professional women, "side hustlers" (those with a day job who are building a business on the side), and anyone in between who wants to become a better woman. This book will not teach you how to build a multimillion dollar business. It won't teach you about systems or operational processes. But it will teach you how to build confidence in yourself, reconnect with your "why," eradicate jealousy, and ultimately learn the power of connection. Because at the end of the day, that's what life and business is all about.

Genres: Business, Self Help, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Feminism, Entrepreneurship, Audiobook

143 pages, Paperback

First published August 14, 2015

Reviews

[Lala BooksandLala · Rating 3 out of 5]

I didn't really intend to gain anything from this book tbh as it's not something I would pick up on my own volition; I ended up reading it in order to lead a book club with the company I work for's distributors.

Overall, I have a very different personality than the author, so there were some things I just couldn't relate to, but it wasn't overly bothersome in the end. The interviews throughout with other entrepreneurs I felt got a little repetitive, but really how many times can you say "support other women" without sounding like a broken record.

Here are some of my takeaways:

I really liked the passage about change and perfection. How you shouldn't wait until you or your business idea is perfect before jumping in- because that will never happen. You have to change as you go and adapt your business to whatever ends up working.

I really connect with the idea of the law of attraction and how positive thoughts can totally affect your life. Cara talked about how your personal life and business life are way more related than you might think, and frustration in either, can affect how you view the other one. So overall, just that positivity is good? Which is such an easy thing to say, but something I think is important to continually work on implementing.

EVERYONE you meet is a potential friend, collaborator, customer, colleague etc. was a good reminder. On that note, always having business cards on hand.

I appreciated the take on jealousy and being envious, and how "envy" isn't a bad word! It can be motivating and help you set goals when you see others succeeding.

[Sarah Churchill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Seriously enjoyed this. I'm on a bit of a self development drive at the moment and reading as many books like this as I can, but this is one of my favourites by far. Maybe because it's written by a woman specifically for women, but it's just so empowering, and... nice!

I've made a major shift in my life over the past year, distancing myself from people who bring me down, turning away from bitchiness and gossip and not engaging with haters. Instead I've surrounded myself with positive influences who support and encourage me, inspiring me every day to work harder and be a better me. I can't explain how much happier I am!

This book is geared towards female entrepreneurs or business women, and having been in an industry where women work together and SHARE without competition or judgement for the past year I can tell you that this book is right. We can be so much more when we work together.

For non-entrepreneurs I do think it still applies though, it offers a lot of ideas on how to treat and be treated, attitudes and mindset, facing fears and being your own inspiration.

Only small criticism from me is the interviews that end each cjapter; they just got a bit repetitive for me. But otherwise I really enjoyed it and I LOVE the message.

[Lesley · Rating 1 out of 5]

I actually returned this to Audible. I found that I couldn't relate to it at all, the Chanel purses, the glitter, the magazine cover beauty talk... Not for me at all and I found the interviews with the Girl Bosses pretty cheesy.

[Cinzia DuBois · Rating 2 out of 5]

The book has a good message, don’t get me wrong. Technically, I agree with all her philosophies, but this is the epitome of “pop culture power puff girl boss” energy.

I appreciate books which talk to women about business just as they would a man. I don’t want to be told to “pick myself up by my stilettos” and “shake it off” like Taylor Swift.

Just far too patronising and pop-culture, girl boss babe- like for me.

[Korrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been wanting to get back into reading business books, and this was a great one. I've been a big fan of Cara for a long time but this was the first book of hers that I've read. I can't wait to pick up more from her! This book was really inspiring and made me want to reach out to all of the incredible women I know. I see myself reading it many more times in the future.

[Mirkat · Rating 2 out of 5]

Mixed Feelings on Girl Code
I was torn about whether to give this book two stars or three, so I split the difference and went with 2.5*.  As suggested in my title, I had mixed feelings on this one.  I am a sucker for "cooperation instead of competition."  I am all for being supportive of others, inspired instead of envious.  I think the advice to create something that doesn't exist but that you wish did is a great concept.  But I get skittish about the buzzspeak on "limitless luxe"; that if you just tap into the abundance of the universe and let that universe know all the awesome stuff you want in your life, that benevolent universe will send it to you.  The "law of attraction" thing.  I haven't read The Secret, but apparently it can be credited/blamed for popularizing this concept.  Here is a quote from the article "‘The Secret’ Law of Attraction Doesn’t Work: Here’s Proof":
 

One of the most devious aspects of The Secret is that if someone fails to get what they want, The Secret dictates it is the person’s own fault. The Secret also blames cancer patients for manifesting negative energy and therefore causing their own cancer. It is this kind of victim-blaming mentality that makes this way of thinking so dangerous.
 
In addition to leading people into a destructive state of mind, psychologist Jenna Baddeley says that adopting the Law of Attraction as valid “promotes a relationship between the individual and the world that is akin to a glorified infancy.” She also says that believing that bad things are the fault of the person experiencing them leads people to a decreased state of empathy, since the victim is the one who is blamed for what’s happening to them.

That's what troubles me about this philosophy:  if you want things hard enough, you'll get them; if you don't get what you want, you must not have wanted hard enough/the right way, and if bad things happen in your life, you must have attracted those bad things with your bad, bad thoughts.  It also strikes me as an extremely privileged perspective.
 
The other troubling message I think someone might pick up from this book is that everyone needs to be an entrepreneur.  As if being an employee somewhere is at odds with self-actualization.  And I'm not saying that entrepreneurship can't be a great path, but not everyone should pursue it.  Yes, everyone has a unique perspective and singular skills of their own, but this doesn't translate into running a business for everyone.
 
And maybe I'm getting old and cranky, but the cutesy hashtag speak makes me cringe:  all the "girlboss" and "mompreneur" type lingo.
 
Having said all that, I do appreciate the value of establishing support networks, of giving as well as getting support.  And the interviews included do provide some inspiring stories (but why must the author keep asking her interviewees for their "personal mission statement"?).
 
This audiobook was only three hours and forty-six minutes long, so I expect the text version would be a quick one-sitting read for someone seeking a female-empowerment message.  Maybe pick it up in your library and leaf through a bit to see if this would hold value for you.

*I know this doesn't make sense on Goodreads; my Booklikes account is synchronized to auto-post reviews I write there --> GR, and Booklikes has half stars. They get bumped down here! Though really I'm considering knocking my BL rating down to an even ** the more I think about my misgivings....

[Missjane_Lifestyle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Бүсгүйчүүдийн оролцоо удирдах түвшинд хэрэгтэй байна.
Бид хэдий болтол өөрсдийгөө эрчүүдээс дор үзэж хэн нэгэн эмэгтэйгээ өөрийгөө харьцуулах вэ?
Аливаа зүйлд өөрийгөө сорьж хамгийн гол нь оролцох нь чухал. Өрсөлдөөнийг мэдэрч өөрийн хүрээнээс гар. Өөрөөсөө илүү бүсгүйчүүд байдгыг мэдэж ав. Энэ л чухал.
Эмэгтэй хүний өмнө тулгардаг бэрхшээлүүд, нийтлэг ойлголтуудын тухай эмх цэгцтэй бичжээ.

[Temi Panayotova-Kendeva · Rating 3 out of 5]

Somewhat inspirational...

[Tiana Warner · Rating 3 out of 5]

The overall intent and message is good. Women need to empower each other, to stop competing, to stop feeling jealous when another succeeds. There is plenty of success to go around, and if we support each other's dreams, everyone wins. Awesome. The later chapters on dealing with negativity and jealousy had a few nuggets of wisdom that I will call back to if I ever feel envious of someone else's success, or if I receive negative reviews/feedback.

But oh, god, this was such a Basic Bitch book. "You're a strong, independent woman who don't need no man!" So many references to designer handbags, champagne, The Secret, stilettos, manicures, Oprah, Starbucks, and the colour pink. Like, "get out your pink highlighter, this interview is juicy!" and "you gotta pick yourself up by the stilettos!" and "I would bet my Chanel handbag..." and--GMMPH-- sorry, I threw up in my mouth a little.

Bottom line: It's worth the read, but prepare yourself for a ridiculous onslaught of girliness.



#blessed #psl #inspirationalquote #yoga

[Courtney · Rating 2 out of 5]

There are many, many things to love about this book if you're looking for another book about how to like yourself, talk positively to yourself, trust the universe, and give yourself permission to care for yourself.

Unfortunately, timing wise, I think I am over the whole movement of motivational books for women being based solely on social and familial stories, buzz words that are hyper-feminized, and self care tips. I'm ready for the how to books on getting shit done. Tell me how to start my business. Who to talk to, what paper work to fill out, what things to consider in my business plan, how to effectively market myself, tips and tricks for getting started that I might not have otherwise thought about. And a little talk about balance is fine. Balance is important. But come on. The secret to being a successful entrepreneur is not only to love yourself and trust the Universe. That gets you now where in business land.

Sure, there is bounty in the universe. But nothing is limitless. The idea of "limitless luxe" and that everything in the universe is there for you if you just let yourself believe you can have it is, simply put, illogical. There is a saturation point in every market and a point at which things become obsolete. Maybe you don't need to believe in so much scarcity that you can't even get started, but believing in infinite abundance of all things... especially the market... is just a recipe for disaster in blind decision making.

This view, that positivity and belief will get you everywhere, is not supported in research. Research shows that positive thinking is no better than pessimistic thinking because it isn't necessarily rooted in reality. Positivity is not necessarily related to higher achievement than negaitivity and unrealistic optimism (one that might exist as a result of believing in limitless luxe) is particularly damaging to goal achievement. Realism, rather than optimism or pessimism is the way to go because it leads a person to really focus the challenges before them without giving up or skipping steps. Or so research on achievement suggests.

Positive attitudes can make a person happier (which isn't the same as achieving goals). And self-efficacy (your belief in your own abilities) is one of the true factors in resiliency, perseverance, and achievement. We should all focus a little more on self-efficacy. But you don't have to believe in limitless luxe, the law of attraction, or even be an optimist to believe in your own capabilities.

The last problem that I had with this book is one of purely preference. To me, both the author and a few of the guest speakers in the book seem to be a bit out of touch with reality for the majority of women who are starting out or even those who have been in business for a while. The book seemed to be highly focused on champagne, wine, Coach bags, designer labels, pedicures and all things affluent and glittery. It seemed to be written for the privileged by the privileged, with few exceptions.

Over all, the most enjoyable parts of the book for me were the interviews with Consolee (a genocide survivor fighting for women's rights) and Katie ( a former model who began her own modeling agencey for healthy sized women). These women seemed in touch with the issues of our times. Rape as a war tool and unhealthy body images leading to mental health and eating disorders in young women. These are things that matter to me and inspire me and I will be looking more into these women and their stories and writings where available. If it hasn't been for those two interviews, I likely would have given this book one star.

[Mia · Rating 1 out of 5]

متاسفانه وایت/لیبرال/girl boss فمینیسم فقط برای غربیهای پریولجد و طبقه های اجتماعی محدودی مناسبه و برای رنگین‌پوست ها دردی رو دوا نمیکنه

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of inspiration here, and surprisingly positive perspectives on dealing with jealousy and haters. Truly encouraging and a nice, quick read.

[Soha · Rating 5 out of 5]

كتابي بي نظير كه حتمااا بايد همه خانوم ها بخونن و ياد بگيرند خودشون رو دست كم نگيرند و براي موفقيت تلاش كنند

[Sofia · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this because I'm taking my first class in a social entrepreneurship program this coming semester. I really wanted to like it. I was excited to find a book directed specifically towards women who are either already in the field or getting interested in entrepreneurship. Unfortunately though, this book expected a certain shallowness and materialism of women: emphasizing champagne, designer bags, and glitter more so than substantial advice about being a woman in an often male dominated space. It also came from an extremely privileged perspective that didn't understand that not everyone has the money, time, and energy to immediately invest in themselves and their dreams, or to "pick themselves up by the stilettos." I'm only giving it the second star because it did have valuable things to say about women supporting other women and having confidence in your own abilities.

[Lauren · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was our book club read this month which is the only way I probably would have read it as I have never considered being an entrepreneur.

I did find it interesting and thought some good points were made about believing in yourself, having compassion and facing your fears.

However some points got to me on a personal level. Like glamorising designer leather bags and mink eyelashes. This is disgusting to me as I just don't understand why people need to use animals for fashion and beauty. It certainly does not make them glamorous to me.

Another point was that she often referred to needing cocktails and wine to really get things done, even at one point saying that wine with brunch is necessary to be a lady boss. I disagree and think that women can be successful without drinking at all.

[Laura · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm all for the perspective this book enforces, about positivity and support between people, instead of competition. For me though, it seemed to be written for people who struggle with competitive jealousy among their peers in their field, so reading it felt like a bit of a step backwards in that regard. I didn't finish it, but I fully back the message of supporting fellow women on our way to success.

[Yoanna Mladenova · Rating 3 out of 5]

Първото впечатление за повърхностно четиво към края се опроверга. Тайната на успеха не съм открила, но се замислих върху доста аспекти от пътя към него - завистта, самочувствието, изборите, които правим.

[Hannah · Rating 2 out of 5]

As a woman who owns a multimillion dollar business, I'm always looking for books and resources that I can relate to. This wasn't it. The actions described are shallow and juvenile. Luckily I don't have women like this in my life.

[Jasmine LaBine · Rating 2 out of 5]

So many typos...very repetitive and materialistic.

[My Secret Garden · Rating 4 out of 5]

9 chapters full of secrets for women out there , that seek to change their entrepreneurial mindset and expand .
The most important mojo was " women empowering women" , i'll be sharing my thoughts soon.

[Frances Blackthorn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Actual Rating: 4.5 stars

[امیرمحمد حیدری · Rating 1 out of 5]

اگر راز زنان موفق در حرف‌های اپرا وینفری و آهنگ‌های بیانسه است، که واقعا دیگر حرفی ندارم. چرا فمنیست‌ها این لکه‌های ننگ را جرر نمی‌دهند؟

[Kiki · Rating 2 out of 5]

I went into this book blind. The message was good, women need to empower eachother more. But this felt like such a basic book for me.

2 ⭐️

[Meriem EBM (bookworm.chaos) · Rating 5 out of 5]

A cheesiful written book to empower women.
This is mainly what it is discussing:
The Secret’s Out: There’s Enough for All of Us
Trust Your Own Brilliance
The Power of Connection
The “F” Word
Shake it Off: Dealing with Haters, Copy Cats, and The Peanut Gallery
There’s No Time for Bullshit When You’re Building an Empire
Look For The Diamond Lining
Don’t Hate Her Because She’s Successful
Don’t Wait For An Invitation

Two words, READ IT.

Every Woman should/must read it.

[Khawlah Alsalem · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very nice quick read. Lots of inspiration to empower women and to broaden their mindsets in order to succeed in their entrepreneurial journey. If you ever felt alone, grab this book and you’ll find the support you were looking for. No matter where you are in your career, I trust you’re going to get a lot from this book.

The Girl Code emphasizes on the idea that women need to empower each other, to stop competing, to stop feeling jealous when another succeeds. There is plenty of success to go around, and if we support each other's dreams, everyone wins. How powerful women can be when they stand together, share their support, and empower each other to reach their full potential.

The book has around 10 interviews with females entrepreneurs leaves you believing that you can accomplish anything as long as you have the dedication to do so.

It’s good to keep this book handy and revisit it whenever you need a boost. It’s meant to be a guide and a true motivation for all women seeking out major changes in their lives.

Below are some of the quotes that I genuinely and strongly agree with that Cara had talked about in this book.

“You have got to be authentic.
What is authenticity? According to Merriam-Webster’s, the word authentic means “real or genuine: not copied or false.” One of the first things you need to think about when creating something for the world is your own unique fingerprint. You do something that nobody else in this world can do.

Being authentic is scary for many people. And I get it. When you stop hiding behind a facade of what you think you should be doing, you become vulnerable. When you show your true self, you risk judgment, ridicule, and rejection, among other things. But you also give yourself an opportunity to be loved, accepted, and heard for who you truly are at the core. You give others the opportunity to connect with you and learn something they may not have learned otherwise. And that is an awesome feeling.

I believe that being honest and raw with your story is the only way to truly connect with others. If you’re not willing to give your audience all of you, then what’s the point? What is there to gain by being anything but genuine?”

I would have given this book 3 stars due to repetition of the same topics and ideas, but as I’ve enjoyed reading it I had to rate it a 4-star book.

[Evelina Rumenova · Rating 1 out of 5]

The intent of this book is nice - to empower women and to broaden your mind in order to succeed in life. However, this "book" had no effect on me. It's basically a repetitive talk of how you should love yourself and trust the Universe, and then suddenly all of your dreams will eventually come true.... Well, this doesn't work like that.
It is generally true that positive attitude can make you a happier person, yet this doesn't apply to achieving goals. This scribbling contains nothing but cliché advice. It says nothing about how to get sh*t done.
What is more, I couldn't relate to all the luxury, Chanel purses, magazine covers and beauty talk. Plus, all the interviews with those successful ladies were so cheesy.

[Tiffany · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book is rather insulting to women. It's so cheap and feeds into that " all women are merely princesses" bullshit. Telling me to grab my hot pink highlighter and put on my thinking tiara is so silly. I couldn't relate at all, and I tried to get through but it was just not good. Don't even get me started on the constant use of the term "Mompreneur" which once again separates a women's accomplishments from a mans And that it's only impressive because she is a mom.
Everything in here could be found on a Pinterest board of SUPER GIRLY inspirational quotes. I give up!

I ended up returning to Audible and will be getting something at better instead.

[Liz Perez · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book had so much hype in my direct sales company so I bought it as an audio book. While I like the message of women empowering women, it's super vague and kind of an entire book of the author and the people she interviewed humble bragging. Or in some cases not humble bragging. I like self help books to inspire myself in my business but some of the books just aren't feasible for a person who is working a 9-5 or has kids. Yeah, we all have the same 24 hours in a day but not everyone can work 17 hours of the day.

[Vaishnavi Kaveeshwar · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had followed her blog 'The champagne diet' in the past which made me read this book.To my surprise the book had a few helpful tips.However it is written in a monotonous manner while being prejudiced with the stereotype that all the girls like everything pink and Jimmy Choos and LV. I mean Yes. I get the appeal but enough with the materialistic references already.

[Greg Harrington · Rating 5 out of 5]

So inspired

Awesome read! Since the first chapter of this book I saw a shift in myself. I've always know I wanted something more. This book gave me a kick in the butt to start brainstorming and putting ideas to paper. Thanks so much