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Before I Let You Go
The 2:00 a.m. call is the first time Lexie Vidler has heard her sister’s voice in years. Annie is a drug addict, a thief, a liar—and in trouble, again. Lexie has always bailed Annie out, given her money, a place to sleep, sent her to every kind of rehab. But this time, she’s not just strung out—she’s pregnant and in premature labor. If she goes to the hospital, she’ll lose custody of her baby—maybe even go to prison. But the alternative is unthinkable.
As weeks unfold, Lexie finds herself caring for her fragile newborn niece while her carefully ordered life is collapsing around her. She’s in danger of losing her job, and her fiancé only has so much patience for Annie’s drama. In court-ordered rehab, Annie attempts to halt her downward spiral by confronting long-buried secrets from the sisters’ childhood, ghosts that Lexie doesn’t want to face. But will the journey heal Annie, or lead her down a darker path?
Both candid and compassionate, Before I Let You Go explores a hotly divisive topic and asks how far the ties of family love can be stretched before they finally break.
As weeks unfold, Lexie finds herself caring for her fragile newborn niece while her carefully ordered life is collapsing around her. She’s in danger of losing her job, and her fiancé only has so much patience for Annie’s drama. In court-ordered rehab, Annie attempts to halt her downward spiral by confronting long-buried secrets from the sisters’ childhood, ghosts that Lexie doesn’t want to face. But will the journey heal Annie, or lead her down a darker path?
Both candid and compassionate, Before I Let You Go explores a hotly divisive topic and asks how far the ties of family love can be stretched before they finally break.
384 pages, Paperback
First published April 3, 2018
3491 people are currently reading
48969 people want to read
About the author
Kelly Rimmer
22 books8,027 followersKelly Rimmer is the author of historical and contemporary fiction, including The Warsaw Orphan, The Things We Cannot Say and The Secret Daughter, with 3 million books sold. Her books have been translated into dozens of languages and have appeared on bestseller lists around the world, including The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and USA Today.
Since 2022, Kelly has owned and operated Collins Booksellers Orange, the last remaining bookstore in the small regional city she calls home. Her next novel, The Midnight Estate, will be released in Australia, New Zealand and the UK in July 2025.
Since 2022, Kelly has owned and operated Collins Booksellers Orange, the last remaining bookstore in the small regional city she calls home. Her next novel, The Midnight Estate, will be released in Australia, New Zealand and the UK in July 2025.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 3,592 reviews
February 23, 2023
5 stars! This was a touching and emotional novel that affected me deeply. I have not stopped thinking about these characters since I finished reading.
This is a story about addiction. It involves family secrets that test the strength of the bond of sisters. This novel will challenge you to examine your thoughts and feelings toward addiction and the effects it has on the addict as well as their families. My mind was swimming with my thoughts and reactions as the story progressed. I questioned myself constantly throughout the pages of this novel, asking how I would react and I really struggled to find my answers (some answers I still have not yet found).
There are many books about addiction. For me, the piece that truly pulled me into this story was that it was about drug addiction during pregnancy. This got right to my heart and kept me fully invested from first to the last sentence.
I will warn readers that there are upsetting scenes and discussions about the effects that substance abuse during pregnancy has on a newborn baby, but my suggestion is to push through these uncomfortable details (if you feel you can) because this story, as a whole, is deeply contemplative and insightful. It was a very eye-opening journey – one I will never forget experiencing. I would like to thank Kelly Rimmer for writing this deeply affecting story and opening up my mind to understand and show compassion to people who are often judged and ridiculed.
This was a Traveling Sister Read and it sparked very deep discussion and debate. A big thank you to NetGalley, HARLEQUIN – Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review!
Date of Publication: April 3, 2018.
This is a story about addiction. It involves family secrets that test the strength of the bond of sisters. This novel will challenge you to examine your thoughts and feelings toward addiction and the effects it has on the addict as well as their families. My mind was swimming with my thoughts and reactions as the story progressed. I questioned myself constantly throughout the pages of this novel, asking how I would react and I really struggled to find my answers (some answers I still have not yet found).
There are many books about addiction. For me, the piece that truly pulled me into this story was that it was about drug addiction during pregnancy. This got right to my heart and kept me fully invested from first to the last sentence.
I will warn readers that there are upsetting scenes and discussions about the effects that substance abuse during pregnancy has on a newborn baby, but my suggestion is to push through these uncomfortable details (if you feel you can) because this story, as a whole, is deeply contemplative and insightful. It was a very eye-opening journey – one I will never forget experiencing. I would like to thank Kelly Rimmer for writing this deeply affecting story and opening up my mind to understand and show compassion to people who are often judged and ridiculed.
This was a Traveling Sister Read and it sparked very deep discussion and debate. A big thank you to NetGalley, HARLEQUIN – Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review!
Date of Publication: April 3, 2018.
June 8, 2018
My reviews can also be seen at: https://deesradreadsandreviews.wordpr...
After falling in love with Kelly Rimmer’s previous novel “ A Mother’s Confession ”, I was thrilled to have the opportunity to read this upcoming novel.
Lexie Vidler is a doctor who is used to getting calls in the middle of the night on her cell phone. Although she hasn’t spoken to her sister, Annie in more than two years, Lexie isn’t surprised to hear Annie’s voice when her landline rings at 2:00am. She tries to prepare herself for the only thing contact with Annie has brought her over the years…
Chaos
“Lexie, you have to help me – I think I’m dying.”
Instantly, Lexie can tell her sister is high, and angrily tells her to go to the hospital. Her fiancé, Sam is now awake and seems surprised at her tone. However, this isn’t the first middle of the night call she’s received from her little sister….
“I’ve been dealing with her addiction for years, and even after a two-year break from the drama, the weariness returns as soon as she does. If this was a one-off, I’d probably panic and rush to her aid – but it’s not. I have lost count of Annie’s desperate 2:00 a.m. phone calls.”
But Lexie is completely unprepared for what Annie says next….
“Lexie, I’m pregnant. I can’t go to the hospital. I just can’t”.
Lexie has always tried to be there for Annie. When they were young, their father died and their mother went to pieces. Emotionally they were on their own and so Lexie was the one who stepped up to take care of Annie. Lexie had always promised her father that she would take care of Annie. But when Annie pulled a stunt two years earlier that almost got Lexie fired, she knew she had to cut ties with her sister. But THIS is different. This time it’s not just Annie that needs her.
So much is riding on Annie getting clean. Lexie wants to advocate for her sister, but their complicated past has left her with mixed feelings. For Annie to get better and to heal, she will need to address the issues she’s tried to suppress by self-medicating. The secrets she kept from everyone….including Lexie.
Wow! Once again, Kelly Rimmer has written a book that I couldn’t put down. I was hooked from the start and became completely engrossed in the story and its characters. I could relate to the sister's complicated relationship. Because of my own experiences and relationships, some parts of the book hit me very hard. I was emotional and even angry at times. It made me question some of my own pre-conceived notions. And though I’ve finished the book…I can’t stop thinking about it.
This was definitely a thought-provoking read with some controversial issues that could help start some important discussions. The author has obviously done her research and I feel like the story was well-balanced, honest, realistic, and of course, interesting.
“ Before I Let You Go” is a well-written and poignant book about love, family, addiction, abuse, loss, and forgiveness. Another great read from Kelly Rimmer that I won’t soon forget.
Thank you to NetGalley and Graydon House for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for my honest review.
After falling in love with Kelly Rimmer’s previous novel “ A Mother’s Confession ”, I was thrilled to have the opportunity to read this upcoming novel.
Lexie Vidler is a doctor who is used to getting calls in the middle of the night on her cell phone. Although she hasn’t spoken to her sister, Annie in more than two years, Lexie isn’t surprised to hear Annie’s voice when her landline rings at 2:00am. She tries to prepare herself for the only thing contact with Annie has brought her over the years…
Chaos
“Lexie, you have to help me – I think I’m dying.”
Instantly, Lexie can tell her sister is high, and angrily tells her to go to the hospital. Her fiancé, Sam is now awake and seems surprised at her tone. However, this isn’t the first middle of the night call she’s received from her little sister….
“I’ve been dealing with her addiction for years, and even after a two-year break from the drama, the weariness returns as soon as she does. If this was a one-off, I’d probably panic and rush to her aid – but it’s not. I have lost count of Annie’s desperate 2:00 a.m. phone calls.”
But Lexie is completely unprepared for what Annie says next….
“Lexie, I’m pregnant. I can’t go to the hospital. I just can’t”.
Lexie has always tried to be there for Annie. When they were young, their father died and their mother went to pieces. Emotionally they were on their own and so Lexie was the one who stepped up to take care of Annie. Lexie had always promised her father that she would take care of Annie. But when Annie pulled a stunt two years earlier that almost got Lexie fired, she knew she had to cut ties with her sister. But THIS is different. This time it’s not just Annie that needs her.
So much is riding on Annie getting clean. Lexie wants to advocate for her sister, but their complicated past has left her with mixed feelings. For Annie to get better and to heal, she will need to address the issues she’s tried to suppress by self-medicating. The secrets she kept from everyone….including Lexie.
Wow! Once again, Kelly Rimmer has written a book that I couldn’t put down. I was hooked from the start and became completely engrossed in the story and its characters. I could relate to the sister's complicated relationship. Because of my own experiences and relationships, some parts of the book hit me very hard. I was emotional and even angry at times. It made me question some of my own pre-conceived notions. And though I’ve finished the book…I can’t stop thinking about it.
This was definitely a thought-provoking read with some controversial issues that could help start some important discussions. The author has obviously done her research and I feel like the story was well-balanced, honest, realistic, and of course, interesting.
“ Before I Let You Go” is a well-written and poignant book about love, family, addiction, abuse, loss, and forgiveness. Another great read from Kelly Rimmer that I won’t soon forget.
Thank you to NetGalley and Graydon House for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for my honest review.
March 27, 2018
4 Emotional Stars.
Lexie Vidler’s relationship with her sister Annie has always been complicated. Their childhood wasn’t like most families and Annie always relied on her sister as a mother figure. When Lexie gets a call at 2 a.m. after not hearing from heard sister for years, she knows something is wrong. Something bad. But then something is always wrong with Annie. Annie is a drug addict. Has been for years. This time however, it’s not just drugs that Annie has a problem with. Annie is strung out and extremely pregnant and Annie needs medical attention.
Where they live in Alabama, it’s a felony to use drugs while pregnant, thus if Annie gives birth in the hospital, she will lose custody of her baby and go to prison. Yet Annie calls her sister, - her sister - the doctor (whose boyfriend is also an M.D.). Lexie wants to help and she only knows one way to do so. Soon Lexie and her boyfriend Sam’s life is turned upside down, caring for Annie’s daughter Daisy, while Annie is in court ordered rehab.
Lexie and Annie’s relationship is complicated. Always has been. Their childhood, was unlike any other. Annie’s past haunts her. It is heartbreaking. She is raw, pained and struggling. At times, it seemed like she simply just survived. Lexie has always been the mother figure. She has always been the defensive one, unable to let anyone in, ashamed of her sister. Ashamed of her own life. Addiction, you see, is a family disease. You can’t hide from it, even when you want to, and that was prevalent here, as Lexie tried to do so for years.
“Before I Let You Go” by Kelly Rimmer - expertly delved into the subject of drug addiction and how it affected two sisters and their families, as well. Heart wrenching doesn’t begin to cover it. As I said, addiction is a family disease. It is not a label and everyone has a story. Lexie and Annie’s is a powerful one. The characters make you feel, they tear at your heart, make you anxious, make you angry and make you cry. “Before I Let You Go” is a novel that captures a lot of emotions and is one that I highly recommend.
I read this novel with several of my Traveling Sisters. Our reactions sparked incredible discussions. Thank you sisters. I’m so glad I read this one with all you. For Full Traveling Sister Group Reviews, please see Brenda and Norma’s Amazing Blog: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com
Thank you to Edelweiss, Harper Collins and Kelly Rimmer for an ARC of this novel to read and review.
Published on Edelweiss, Goodreads and Twitter on 3.24.18.
Lexie Vidler’s relationship with her sister Annie has always been complicated. Their childhood wasn’t like most families and Annie always relied on her sister as a mother figure. When Lexie gets a call at 2 a.m. after not hearing from heard sister for years, she knows something is wrong. Something bad. But then something is always wrong with Annie. Annie is a drug addict. Has been for years. This time however, it’s not just drugs that Annie has a problem with. Annie is strung out and extremely pregnant and Annie needs medical attention.
Where they live in Alabama, it’s a felony to use drugs while pregnant, thus if Annie gives birth in the hospital, she will lose custody of her baby and go to prison. Yet Annie calls her sister, - her sister - the doctor (whose boyfriend is also an M.D.). Lexie wants to help and she only knows one way to do so. Soon Lexie and her boyfriend Sam’s life is turned upside down, caring for Annie’s daughter Daisy, while Annie is in court ordered rehab.
Lexie and Annie’s relationship is complicated. Always has been. Their childhood, was unlike any other. Annie’s past haunts her. It is heartbreaking. She is raw, pained and struggling. At times, it seemed like she simply just survived. Lexie has always been the mother figure. She has always been the defensive one, unable to let anyone in, ashamed of her sister. Ashamed of her own life. Addiction, you see, is a family disease. You can’t hide from it, even when you want to, and that was prevalent here, as Lexie tried to do so for years.
“Before I Let You Go” by Kelly Rimmer - expertly delved into the subject of drug addiction and how it affected two sisters and their families, as well. Heart wrenching doesn’t begin to cover it. As I said, addiction is a family disease. It is not a label and everyone has a story. Lexie and Annie’s is a powerful one. The characters make you feel, they tear at your heart, make you anxious, make you angry and make you cry. “Before I Let You Go” is a novel that captures a lot of emotions and is one that I highly recommend.
I read this novel with several of my Traveling Sisters. Our reactions sparked incredible discussions. Thank you sisters. I’m so glad I read this one with all you. For Full Traveling Sister Group Reviews, please see Brenda and Norma’s Amazing Blog: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com
Thank you to Edelweiss, Harper Collins and Kelly Rimmer for an ARC of this novel to read and review.
Published on Edelweiss, Goodreads and Twitter on 3.24.18.
March 21, 2018
3.5 A subject that is important and one has not been explored enough in fiction. A pregnant woman, addicted to heroin,who will lose her child and have to serve prison time. A law, which I never knew, that is enforced in some states. At first I had a hard time not being judgemental, having a baby that has to go through withdrawal, just such a horrible thing. Once I read Annie's story though I felt equally sorry for her and what she has gone through. As my grandmother used to tell us, everyone has a story, and it is certainly true here.
Lexie, her older sister, a doctor who has tried to help Annie numerous times, tries to help her again. Taking on the task of caring for the infant, Daisy while Annie goes to rehab. Completing rehab a court imposed mandate if she wants to avoid jail time and ever having a chance of reclaiming her child. Unfortunately I didn't taeto Lexie's character as much as I did Annie's. For a doctor she seemed over emotional, not the capable person she was supposed to be. Repetitive thoughts and actions, whiny at times, which I felt stalled the plot. Also her fiance seemed to good too be true. Alternating between controlling and supportive. Something about him bugged me.
So another mixed read for me, good story for the most part, very worthy subject and a characters terrific, Annie that will frustrate you but who you can't help pulling for. A sisters read with many of us falling on different ends of the rating spectrum. Made for some good discussions though as I'm sure everyone's life experience had a play in their reception of this novel.
ARC from Netgalley.
Lexie, her older sister, a doctor who has tried to help Annie numerous times, tries to help her again. Taking on the task of caring for the infant, Daisy while Annie goes to rehab. Completing rehab a court imposed mandate if she wants to avoid jail time and ever having a chance of reclaiming her child. Unfortunately I didn't taeto Lexie's character as much as I did Annie's. For a doctor she seemed over emotional, not the capable person she was supposed to be. Repetitive thoughts and actions, whiny at times, which I felt stalled the plot. Also her fiance seemed to good too be true. Alternating between controlling and supportive. Something about him bugged me.
So another mixed read for me, good story for the most part, very worthy subject and a characters terrific, Annie that will frustrate you but who you can't help pulling for. A sisters read with many of us falling on different ends of the rating spectrum. Made for some good discussions though as I'm sure everyone's life experience had a play in their reception of this novel.
ARC from Netgalley.
March 30, 2018
5 big stars to Before I Let You Go, an honest, emotional, compassionate story of addiction 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟
When Lexie’s estranged sister, Annie, calls her one day for help, it’s serious. Annie has been using drugs again, and she’s pregnant and showing signs of early labor. On top of that, she’s afraid she’ll lose her baby and possibly be arrested due to endangerment laws.
The reader quickly learns there’s more to Annie’s past and why she abuses drugs, a past that is quite painful and told through her own words in letters. What ensues is the push-pull dynamic of a sibling trying to help, support, advocate for, and love her sister in all the ways she knows how, as both a doctor and family member.
Because of the unique sibling interplay, as well as the underlying mental illness and tremendous pain, this book reminded me of Everything Here is Beautiful, another favorite book of mine this year. The characterization and writing styles are different, but the emotionality and authenticity are there in both books in spades.
At times raw, but always honest and compelling, Before I Let You Go is an important read. One that sheds light on addiction and its impact on families, but at a much deeper level, how society treats females with drug addiction differently, mothers especially, legally and with underlying stigma.
This was a Traveling Sister read, and I enjoyed the discussion that this thought-provoking book generated. Please visit Norma and Brenda’s blog for this review, the combined Traveling Sister reviews, and much more: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com/2...
Thank you to Kelly Rimmer for writing this book with great care and compassion, as well as Graydon House/Harper Collins, and Edelweiss for the complimentary copy. Before I Let You Go will be published on April 3, 2018.
When Lexie’s estranged sister, Annie, calls her one day for help, it’s serious. Annie has been using drugs again, and she’s pregnant and showing signs of early labor. On top of that, she’s afraid she’ll lose her baby and possibly be arrested due to endangerment laws.
The reader quickly learns there’s more to Annie’s past and why she abuses drugs, a past that is quite painful and told through her own words in letters. What ensues is the push-pull dynamic of a sibling trying to help, support, advocate for, and love her sister in all the ways she knows how, as both a doctor and family member.
Because of the unique sibling interplay, as well as the underlying mental illness and tremendous pain, this book reminded me of Everything Here is Beautiful, another favorite book of mine this year. The characterization and writing styles are different, but the emotionality and authenticity are there in both books in spades.
At times raw, but always honest and compelling, Before I Let You Go is an important read. One that sheds light on addiction and its impact on families, but at a much deeper level, how society treats females with drug addiction differently, mothers especially, legally and with underlying stigma.
This was a Traveling Sister read, and I enjoyed the discussion that this thought-provoking book generated. Please visit Norma and Brenda’s blog for this review, the combined Traveling Sister reviews, and much more: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com/2...
Thank you to Kelly Rimmer for writing this book with great care and compassion, as well as Graydon House/Harper Collins, and Edelweiss for the complimentary copy. Before I Let You Go will be published on April 3, 2018.
March 22, 2018
Lexie gets a phone call at 2 am from her sister, Annie. She hasn't heard from her in years. She finds out that Annie is pregnant, but she won't go to the hospital, because she is afraid that she can't pass a drug test.
Annie is a drug addict. She has failed over and over again to get clean and sober. If she goes to the hospital, she knows that she will lose custody of her baby. She might even have to go to prison.
Lexie has always been there for her sister. They both share a strong bond of a terrible painful childhood. Lexie has her hands full.
She is a doctor and plans on getting married soon. They both live different lives. Lexie is in danger of losing her job.
Annie is in Rehab and writes her story through letters that are long buried secrets from the sister's childhood.
This was such a heartbreaking story. I just loved Annie. It had me in an emotional mess. The author shows that addiction affects every member of the family. The author did a great job telling both sides of the story, Annie, the addict, and Lexie the family member, who is affected by her sister's addiction.
Their childhood was such a terrible painful past. This book made me feel, I was in tears in certain parts of the story. This book covers so many emotional issues and difficult subject matter. I thought Lexie did everything she could do to help her sister.
This was a page turner for me. I just wanted to find out what happened next.
I loved the characters. I had empathy for Annie, Lexie and Sam.
Make sure you have tissues handy, while reading this book.
This was a Traveling Sister Read and it was a great discussion and I really enjoyed reading this with them.
I want to thank Edelweiss, Graydon House/ Harper Collins and Kelly Rimmer for the copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Annie is a drug addict. She has failed over and over again to get clean and sober. If she goes to the hospital, she knows that she will lose custody of her baby. She might even have to go to prison.
Lexie has always been there for her sister. They both share a strong bond of a terrible painful childhood. Lexie has her hands full.
She is a doctor and plans on getting married soon. They both live different lives. Lexie is in danger of losing her job.
Annie is in Rehab and writes her story through letters that are long buried secrets from the sister's childhood.
This was such a heartbreaking story. I just loved Annie. It had me in an emotional mess. The author shows that addiction affects every member of the family. The author did a great job telling both sides of the story, Annie, the addict, and Lexie the family member, who is affected by her sister's addiction.
Their childhood was such a terrible painful past. This book made me feel, I was in tears in certain parts of the story. This book covers so many emotional issues and difficult subject matter. I thought Lexie did everything she could do to help her sister.
This was a page turner for me. I just wanted to find out what happened next.
I loved the characters. I had empathy for Annie, Lexie and Sam.
Make sure you have tissues handy, while reading this book.
This was a Traveling Sister Read and it was a great discussion and I really enjoyed reading this with them.
I want to thank Edelweiss, Graydon House/ Harper Collins and Kelly Rimmer for the copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
October 28, 2018
This was a heartbreaking and powerful story about the impact of addiction not only on the addict, but the addict’s family...
A beautiful story about an ugly subject... I feel as though I have shared a lot of personal garbage this week, but my ex is an addict... not heroine but, that’s irrelevant, addiction is addiction, its impact is great no matter what the addiction is... The reason I mention this is because it is really difficult for me to sympathize with an addict, especially when children are involved... I am angry, frustrated, and sad that my kids feel as though their father chose his addiction over them... so, it is hard for me to find forgiveness or understanding for somebody who appears on the surface to have done the same thing.... The storyline in this book in my opinion helps to foster understanding and alter perceptions of attics... as a mother and as a woman I found compassion for Annie, but I felt a connection with Lexie.... all this is to say I came into this book with strong feelings and biases, I am not a neutral observer...
Lexie got the dreaded 2AM phone call it is Annie, her little sister who she has not spoken to in years.... she can tell Annie is high and is tempted to hang up the phone until Annie tells her, that she is pregnant.... pregnant, sick, and strung out on heroin, what is Lexie to do? Lexie and her fiancé are both doctors, so, they head to Annie’s trailer park to find her with preeclampsia.... with no other choice than to take her to the hospital, Annie can possibly be charged with child endangerment, and Lexie could possibly be left with Annie’s baby...
Told from alternating points of view Lexie in the present and Annie in the pass... The sisters had a hard and unconventional upbringing... with some secrets still to be revealed that could really stir up some long buried feelings.... The story was just so Well told and so well researched.... I struggled right along with Lexie the entire story walking that fine line between love and hate, forgiveness and blame, hope and frustration, hello and goodbye.... this is the type of story that evokes many emotions and opinions and sticks with you long after the last page is red....
Absolutely recommend for anybody who appreciates a well told story about real life issues... nothing is sugarcoated in this book it is real, it is raw, and it is Messi just like life!
A beautiful story about an ugly subject... I feel as though I have shared a lot of personal garbage this week, but my ex is an addict... not heroine but, that’s irrelevant, addiction is addiction, its impact is great no matter what the addiction is... The reason I mention this is because it is really difficult for me to sympathize with an addict, especially when children are involved... I am angry, frustrated, and sad that my kids feel as though their father chose his addiction over them... so, it is hard for me to find forgiveness or understanding for somebody who appears on the surface to have done the same thing.... The storyline in this book in my opinion helps to foster understanding and alter perceptions of attics... as a mother and as a woman I found compassion for Annie, but I felt a connection with Lexie.... all this is to say I came into this book with strong feelings and biases, I am not a neutral observer...
Lexie got the dreaded 2AM phone call it is Annie, her little sister who she has not spoken to in years.... she can tell Annie is high and is tempted to hang up the phone until Annie tells her, that she is pregnant.... pregnant, sick, and strung out on heroin, what is Lexie to do? Lexie and her fiancé are both doctors, so, they head to Annie’s trailer park to find her with preeclampsia.... with no other choice than to take her to the hospital, Annie can possibly be charged with child endangerment, and Lexie could possibly be left with Annie’s baby...
Told from alternating points of view Lexie in the present and Annie in the pass... The sisters had a hard and unconventional upbringing... with some secrets still to be revealed that could really stir up some long buried feelings.... The story was just so Well told and so well researched.... I struggled right along with Lexie the entire story walking that fine line between love and hate, forgiveness and blame, hope and frustration, hello and goodbye.... this is the type of story that evokes many emotions and opinions and sticks with you long after the last page is red....
Absolutely recommend for anybody who appreciates a well told story about real life issues... nothing is sugarcoated in this book it is real, it is raw, and it is Messi just like life!
October 7, 2018
"There is no off switch to the love between sisters; no way to pause it, no way to destroy it."
This story was both a heartbreaking and heartwarming tale of the love between two sisters. Annie is a drug addict facing the biggest problem of her life. She is strung out, pregnant and in premature labor. Not knowing what else to do she calls her big sister, Lexie, for help. Lexie has always been more of a mother than a sister to Annie. She has always stepped in to help her little sister throughout the trials of her life, with unwavering love and compassion.
"Addiction is, in that way, just like love—in the early moments, you don’t see the potential for it to bring you pain—it’s just something you slide into between laughs and smiles and moments of bliss. It’s something that feels like a shield, until you realize it’s actually a warhead, and it’s pointed right at you."
Annie's addiction was fueled by her childhood. The early loss of her father and the traumatic years that followed led her down a dark path where drugs offered her the only escape she felt worthy of having. Now, she is faced with jail time and the possible loss of her daughter if she doesn't complete a rehab program and remain sober.
The story is told in alternating voices between Lexie's perspective as she struggles to take care of her newborn niece and Annie's journal entries. The journal entries offer insight into how Annie ended up the way she did and they are heartbreaking in their honesty.
Aside from the obvious bond between the sisters another aspect I really enjoyed from the book was Lexie's fiance, Sam. What an amazing man! Honestly, I know he was fictional but he seriously made me swoon. He was so patient, loving and compassionate.
On the other hand, I was so infuriated by Lexie & Annie's mother. I just wanted to shake her to knock some sense into her!
"It’s funny how every single thing in your life can shatter with a single decision."
Though I knew what the ending would hold it still broke my heart. There were no surprises in the plot but the story was well told. It was thought-provoking regarding the issue of drug addicted pregnant women & mothers. It was also an honest look at addiction, family, loss, secrets, love and forgiveness. This story definitely has triggers so go into it aware but I feel that Kelly Rimmer handled these tough topics with compassion, hope and honesty.
This story was both a heartbreaking and heartwarming tale of the love between two sisters. Annie is a drug addict facing the biggest problem of her life. She is strung out, pregnant and in premature labor. Not knowing what else to do she calls her big sister, Lexie, for help. Lexie has always been more of a mother than a sister to Annie. She has always stepped in to help her little sister throughout the trials of her life, with unwavering love and compassion.
"Addiction is, in that way, just like love—in the early moments, you don’t see the potential for it to bring you pain—it’s just something you slide into between laughs and smiles and moments of bliss. It’s something that feels like a shield, until you realize it’s actually a warhead, and it’s pointed right at you."
Annie's addiction was fueled by her childhood. The early loss of her father and the traumatic years that followed led her down a dark path where drugs offered her the only escape she felt worthy of having. Now, she is faced with jail time and the possible loss of her daughter if she doesn't complete a rehab program and remain sober.
The story is told in alternating voices between Lexie's perspective as she struggles to take care of her newborn niece and Annie's journal entries. The journal entries offer insight into how Annie ended up the way she did and they are heartbreaking in their honesty.
Aside from the obvious bond between the sisters another aspect I really enjoyed from the book was Lexie's fiance, Sam. What an amazing man! Honestly, I know he was fictional but he seriously made me swoon. He was so patient, loving and compassionate.
On the other hand, I was so infuriated by Lexie & Annie's mother. I just wanted to shake her to knock some sense into her!
"It’s funny how every single thing in your life can shatter with a single decision."
Though I knew what the ending would hold it still broke my heart. There were no surprises in the plot but the story was well told. It was thought-provoking regarding the issue of drug addicted pregnant women & mothers. It was also an honest look at addiction, family, loss, secrets, love and forgiveness. This story definitely has triggers so go into it aware but I feel that Kelly Rimmer handled these tough topics with compassion, hope and honesty.
February 17, 2025
4.5 stars!
BEFORE I LET YOU GO by KELLY RIMMER is a touching, raw, heartbreaking and an absolutely wonderful novel that had me totally emotionally engaged and interested throughout the entire book. I was totally immersed in this deeply moving and beautifully written story here making it hard to put down.
KELLY RIMMER delivers a compassionate, thought-provoking and well-written story here that touches on so many emotional issues and the sensitive subject matter of addiction. The story was told in alternating perspectives from Lexie in present day and from Annie through letters and diary entries. The portrayal of these characters and the bond that these two sisters shared was executed so well and in a realistic and honest way that touched my heart.
To sum it all up it was an interesting, insightful, unforgettable, emotional, and an enjoyable read with a touching, heart-wrenching, and bittersweet ending. Would highly recommend!
Publishing Date: April 3, 2018
Thank you so much to NetGalley, Harlequin - Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for the opportunity to read an advanced copy of the book in exchange for a review!
BEFORE I LET YOU GO by KELLY RIMMER is a touching, raw, heartbreaking and an absolutely wonderful novel that had me totally emotionally engaged and interested throughout the entire book. I was totally immersed in this deeply moving and beautifully written story here making it hard to put down.
KELLY RIMMER delivers a compassionate, thought-provoking and well-written story here that touches on so many emotional issues and the sensitive subject matter of addiction. The story was told in alternating perspectives from Lexie in present day and from Annie through letters and diary entries. The portrayal of these characters and the bond that these two sisters shared was executed so well and in a realistic and honest way that touched my heart.
To sum it all up it was an interesting, insightful, unforgettable, emotional, and an enjoyable read with a touching, heart-wrenching, and bittersweet ending. Would highly recommend!
Publishing Date: April 3, 2018
Thank you so much to NetGalley, Harlequin - Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for the opportunity to read an advanced copy of the book in exchange for a review!
April 29, 2018
Two sisters: one a physician the other a drug addict. One whose unborn baby's life is at risk. The consequences of being an addict and having your parental rights stripped. Then the struggle of doing what's right despite the love you have which has become a codependency. The sacrifices made.
This was a surprisingly engaging story told from both sister's POV.
It is also a foray into the depths of addiction and the struggle to come clean. The good days; the bad. The hopelessness and despair along with the strength required to get well; and the long road to healing and the necessary support systems that need to be in place to recover.
Rimmer delivers a blunt story of sobriety, of the legalities around pregnant addicted women and the stigma that attaches itself to them.
Well done. 4⭐️
This was a surprisingly engaging story told from both sister's POV.
It is also a foray into the depths of addiction and the struggle to come clean. The good days; the bad. The hopelessness and despair along with the strength required to get well; and the long road to healing and the necessary support systems that need to be in place to recover.
Rimmer delivers a blunt story of sobriety, of the legalities around pregnant addicted women and the stigma that attaches itself to them.
Well done. 4⭐️
April 2, 2018
I really love this novel, and here are a couple reasons why: One, Rimmer is sympathetic to both addicts and the family members dealing with addicted love ones. Two, Rimmer is a hugely talented writer.
The story is about two sisters who have been estranged for two years because one of them has battled drug addiction for years. Lexie is the together sister—a doctor who is engaged to a wonderful man. Annie is the sister who has battled drug addiction. Lexie is used to getting late-night calls of requests for help from Annie. She’s put her in rehab, giving her a place to stay, tried to be understanding. She knows addiction is a disease, but it’s frustrating and heart-breaking nonetheless. But this late-night call is different—Annie tells her that she’s pregnant, and because she has still been getting high, she can’t go to the hospital or she risks losing the baby to social services.
Lexie and her fiancé Sam rush to help her. Annie is in premature labor and will die if she doesn’t get to the hospital. What follows is a harrowing tale of Annie trying to get clean and keep custody of her baby and Lexie doing her best to advocate on her behalf.
“We hold our pregnant woman on a pedestal in this society. We say we want the best thing for the babies, so we want to tell their mommas what to eat, what they can drink, what they drugs they can use . . . and there’s good intentions there, and maybe it’s the kind of thing that’s too nuanced to draw the line across but . . . for sure there’s a vein of misogyny here, too. Women who use drugs in pregnancy have fallen off the pedestal, and don’t we all just love to punish them for that.”
“In the last few years . . . politicians talking aout compassion with people with addiction, but . . . no one ever talks about compassion for women who are pregnant and have have addictions. Maybe we’re progressing to the point that we realize that raging addiction isn’t exactly a lifestyle choice, but we’re world’s away from applying that same logic to women who happen to be pregnant. We want our mommas to be perfect, and when they stumble and fall, we punish them.”
The recovery rates for people with substance abuse issues are abysmal. Rimmer deals with the subject with compassion and objectivity. This is a must-read for sure.
Thanks so much to NetGalley and Graydon House for the opportunity to review this novel.
The story is about two sisters who have been estranged for two years because one of them has battled drug addiction for years. Lexie is the together sister—a doctor who is engaged to a wonderful man. Annie is the sister who has battled drug addiction. Lexie is used to getting late-night calls of requests for help from Annie. She’s put her in rehab, giving her a place to stay, tried to be understanding. She knows addiction is a disease, but it’s frustrating and heart-breaking nonetheless. But this late-night call is different—Annie tells her that she’s pregnant, and because she has still been getting high, she can’t go to the hospital or she risks losing the baby to social services.
Lexie and her fiancé Sam rush to help her. Annie is in premature labor and will die if she doesn’t get to the hospital. What follows is a harrowing tale of Annie trying to get clean and keep custody of her baby and Lexie doing her best to advocate on her behalf.
“We hold our pregnant woman on a pedestal in this society. We say we want the best thing for the babies, so we want to tell their mommas what to eat, what they can drink, what they drugs they can use . . . and there’s good intentions there, and maybe it’s the kind of thing that’s too nuanced to draw the line across but . . . for sure there’s a vein of misogyny here, too. Women who use drugs in pregnancy have fallen off the pedestal, and don’t we all just love to punish them for that.”
“In the last few years . . . politicians talking aout compassion with people with addiction, but . . . no one ever talks about compassion for women who are pregnant and have have addictions. Maybe we’re progressing to the point that we realize that raging addiction isn’t exactly a lifestyle choice, but we’re world’s away from applying that same logic to women who happen to be pregnant. We want our mommas to be perfect, and when they stumble and fall, we punish them.”
The recovery rates for people with substance abuse issues are abysmal. Rimmer deals with the subject with compassion and objectivity. This is a must-read for sure.
Thanks so much to NetGalley and Graydon House for the opportunity to review this novel.
October 20, 2018
Every once In a while you need to embrace a story that brings you back down to reality and allows you to express pent up emotions. "Before I Let You Go" by USA bestselling author Kelly Rimmer, is just that book! I guarantee by the time you've finished reading it you'll have used up a box of tissues and given yourself an awful lot to ponder over.
Although I don't have a sister, I could still understand and sympathise with Lexie's torment at her sister Annie's predicament and sympathised at how her once extremely loving and devoted relationship became so estranged. The heart-pounding dilemma she is faced with is heartbreaking and caused such repercussions you could never have foreseen.
I was very surprised to learn that since 2006 the state of Alabama has a chemical endangerment legal code. I had never heard of this legality before and after reading the book I felt the need to research it and did indeed find that substance abuse in pregnancy is a criminal offence in some US states. The story that Kelly has written is based on a young woman, who heavily addicted to heroin, finds herself pregnant and in need of medical assistance and who will be prosecuted if she doesn't successfully complete rehab. Addictions are very easy to acquire and the chemical hit addicts get make it very hard to beat it. Pregnant women should be given help and not penalised if they struggle to cope with rehab and this story really hits home the ordeal women must go through in these situations.
"Before I Let You Go" offers a tremendous amount for a rigorous debate and would definitely make a fantastic book group read for this reason.
I thoroughly enjoyed Annie's story through the telling of her written journal and it was at times heartbreaking to read her thoughts and emotions as she went through a very traumatic childhood and troubled adult years.
Heartbreakingly poignant and desperately sad at times, I will always remember this book and I very much intend to read more of Kelly Rimmer's work. Her story telling is superb and I defy anyone who enjoys women's fiction not to get emotionally attached to this book.
I only wish I could give this book more than five stars, it's worth so much more and I wholeheartedly recommend it and it's author to everyone!
5 MASSIVE stars!
Although I don't have a sister, I could still understand and sympathise with Lexie's torment at her sister Annie's predicament and sympathised at how her once extremely loving and devoted relationship became so estranged. The heart-pounding dilemma she is faced with is heartbreaking and caused such repercussions you could never have foreseen.
I was very surprised to learn that since 2006 the state of Alabama has a chemical endangerment legal code. I had never heard of this legality before and after reading the book I felt the need to research it and did indeed find that substance abuse in pregnancy is a criminal offence in some US states. The story that Kelly has written is based on a young woman, who heavily addicted to heroin, finds herself pregnant and in need of medical assistance and who will be prosecuted if she doesn't successfully complete rehab. Addictions are very easy to acquire and the chemical hit addicts get make it very hard to beat it. Pregnant women should be given help and not penalised if they struggle to cope with rehab and this story really hits home the ordeal women must go through in these situations.
"Before I Let You Go" offers a tremendous amount for a rigorous debate and would definitely make a fantastic book group read for this reason.
I thoroughly enjoyed Annie's story through the telling of her written journal and it was at times heartbreaking to read her thoughts and emotions as she went through a very traumatic childhood and troubled adult years.
Heartbreakingly poignant and desperately sad at times, I will always remember this book and I very much intend to read more of Kelly Rimmer's work. Her story telling is superb and I defy anyone who enjoys women's fiction not to get emotionally attached to this book.
I only wish I could give this book more than five stars, it's worth so much more and I wholeheartedly recommend it and it's author to everyone!
5 MASSIVE stars!
February 15, 2019
$1.99 Kindle special. It was good... worth the price 📚💕
This book explores addiction...
from many sides: the addicted, the fixer, core issues,
probable cause & secrets withheld, the struggle to ‘get sober’, pregnancy drug addicted and the complex consequences: ‘the health of the baby’, legal ramifications, rehab, and emotional toll on not only immediate family members - but their partners too.
Intimate storytelling.....
The characters are wonderfully developed. As the reader - its normal to have opinions while turning the pages....judge?, relate?, dislike? draw conclusions? ....
Wonder who’ will be left behind?
It’s all good- you’ll be engaged!!!
Personally...I got the important insights from Annie...
This is one excerpt - an example- that allowed me to see deeper layers into her struggle.
“Sometimes I get high purely to escape the guilt of how much I’ve hurt her...and of course, I hurt her by using, so then I feel worse, and I use again, and it just goes on and on”.
This is a harrowing story —honest & reflective....
....opening our hearts to the pain of ourselves and others!!
This book explores addiction...
from many sides: the addicted, the fixer, core issues,
probable cause & secrets withheld, the struggle to ‘get sober’, pregnancy drug addicted and the complex consequences: ‘the health of the baby’, legal ramifications, rehab, and emotional toll on not only immediate family members - but their partners too.
Intimate storytelling.....
The characters are wonderfully developed. As the reader - its normal to have opinions while turning the pages....judge?, relate?, dislike? draw conclusions? ....
Wonder who’ will be left behind?
It’s all good- you’ll be engaged!!!
Personally...I got the important insights from Annie...
This is one excerpt - an example- that allowed me to see deeper layers into her struggle.
“Sometimes I get high purely to escape the guilt of how much I’ve hurt her...and of course, I hurt her by using, so then I feel worse, and I use again, and it just goes on and on”.
This is a harrowing story —honest & reflective....
....opening our hearts to the pain of ourselves and others!!
March 30, 2018
Before I Let You Go grabbed my heart from the first page and didn’t let go of it. Kelly Rimmer skillfully writes with compassion and honesty as she explores the bond between two sisters from their traumatic childhood and to the crisis they now face.
Kelly Rimmers does an excellent job compassionately creating our main characters here with Annie and Lexie as they deal with Annie’s drug addiction and an unjust law and the trauma of their past. She realistically captures Annie’s addiction and Lexie’s feelings of guilt, desperation, and anxiety for Annie without forcing any emotions on her readers but allowing us to feel our own. Kelly Rimmer brings insight and understanding to the reality of addiction for people who experience it and their families.
I found the ending well-done even though it wasn’t the direction I wanted it to go, it’s a story I won’t forget. A story that offers hope in understanding the reality of addiction and a look at a different side to it as well. I highly recommend!
Thank you so much to NetGalley, Harlequin - Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for the opportunity to read an advanced copy of the book in exchange for a review!
Review is written and posted on our themed book blog Two Sisters Lost In A Coulee Reading: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com
COULEE is a term applied rather loosely to different landforms, all of which refer to a kind of valley.
Kelly Rimmers does an excellent job compassionately creating our main characters here with Annie and Lexie as they deal with Annie’s drug addiction and an unjust law and the trauma of their past. She realistically captures Annie’s addiction and Lexie’s feelings of guilt, desperation, and anxiety for Annie without forcing any emotions on her readers but allowing us to feel our own. Kelly Rimmer brings insight and understanding to the reality of addiction for people who experience it and their families.
I found the ending well-done even though it wasn’t the direction I wanted it to go, it’s a story I won’t forget. A story that offers hope in understanding the reality of addiction and a look at a different side to it as well. I highly recommend!
Thank you so much to NetGalley, Harlequin - Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for the opportunity to read an advanced copy of the book in exchange for a review!
Review is written and posted on our themed book blog Two Sisters Lost In A Coulee Reading: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com
COULEE is a term applied rather loosely to different landforms, all of which refer to a kind of valley.
March 18, 2018
Before I Let You Go is such an emotional and heart breaking read... this definitely tugged on my heart strings!
Kelly Rimmer ever so gracefully pours her beautiful words across the pages of this novel about loss, addiction, strength, and love.
Lexie Vidler and her sister Annie have had quite the heart-breaking past with Annie's addiction to heroin. Lexie hasn't spoken to her sister in 2 years and one night gets a phone call at 2 am. Lexie thought she has been through it all with Annie, but her world is quickly turned upside down in 2 seconds after she hears that Annie is pregnant. Lexie has always been there for her sister but this time is different.... she needs to protect her sister and her niece.
As you can imagine, there is so much pressure on Annie getting sober for not only herself but her baby. Lexie and Annie have such a deep rooted past with so many un-resolved issues on both of their parts. I can't imagine how Lexie or Annie would feel in this situation.
Kelly Rimmer does an amazing job with the characterization in this novel. You can really feel what Lexie is going through and what Annie is going through.
Of course, due to Annie's substance abuse CPS became involved in this case very quickly. I am familiar with very similar cases as Annie's situation. I was highly annoyed in the beginning of this novel, because the social worker in this novel was portrayed as the typical stereotype that society associates with social workers (lack of empathy and taking children away from their families). But, as the novel progresses author defines how dysfunctional our foster care system truly is. I see this every single day as a social worker and it's refreshing to see a book that actually portrays this.
Addiction is such a heart breaking disease and it affects so many people in different ways and I feel that we need more education on this topic in our society.
I enjoyed this novel but I think due to my experience with cases like this I saw the outcome of the novel about 30 percent in.
I also felt like the character of Lexie was a little repetitive with her feelings and felt that the author could have taken a bit of a back seat with this.
Overall, 3.5 stars for me on this one.
This was a traveling sister read and I enjoyed each sister's viewpoint on this difficult topic of addiction.
Thank you to Netgalley and Harlequin for an advanced arc in exchange for my honest review.
Published to GR: 3/18/18
Publication date: 4/3/18
Kelly Rimmer ever so gracefully pours her beautiful words across the pages of this novel about loss, addiction, strength, and love.
Lexie Vidler and her sister Annie have had quite the heart-breaking past with Annie's addiction to heroin. Lexie hasn't spoken to her sister in 2 years and one night gets a phone call at 2 am. Lexie thought she has been through it all with Annie, but her world is quickly turned upside down in 2 seconds after she hears that Annie is pregnant. Lexie has always been there for her sister but this time is different.... she needs to protect her sister and her niece.
As you can imagine, there is so much pressure on Annie getting sober for not only herself but her baby. Lexie and Annie have such a deep rooted past with so many un-resolved issues on both of their parts. I can't imagine how Lexie or Annie would feel in this situation.
Kelly Rimmer does an amazing job with the characterization in this novel. You can really feel what Lexie is going through and what Annie is going through.
Of course, due to Annie's substance abuse CPS became involved in this case very quickly. I am familiar with very similar cases as Annie's situation. I was highly annoyed in the beginning of this novel, because the social worker in this novel was portrayed as the typical stereotype that society associates with social workers (lack of empathy and taking children away from their families). But, as the novel progresses author defines how dysfunctional our foster care system truly is. I see this every single day as a social worker and it's refreshing to see a book that actually portrays this.
Addiction is such a heart breaking disease and it affects so many people in different ways and I feel that we need more education on this topic in our society.
I enjoyed this novel but I think due to my experience with cases like this I saw the outcome of the novel about 30 percent in.
I also felt like the character of Lexie was a little repetitive with her feelings and felt that the author could have taken a bit of a back seat with this.
Overall, 3.5 stars for me on this one.
This was a traveling sister read and I enjoyed each sister's viewpoint on this difficult topic of addiction.
Thank you to Netgalley and Harlequin for an advanced arc in exchange for my honest review.
Published to GR: 3/18/18
Publication date: 4/3/18
August 19, 2018
Despite the title and cover, Before I Let You Go is not another psychological thriller — so many thrillers have similar titles.
No, it’s a heartfelt story about sisters, addiction, grief and abuse. Lexie and Annie lost their father as children, after which their mother moved them to a very insular and strict religious community. Lexie left first and then Annie followed her. Flash forward several years and Lexie is a doctor and Annie is pregnant and addicted to heroin. The story is told primarily from Lexie’s perspective starting towards the end of Annie’s pregnancy. There are also a few chapters from Annie’s perspective in the form of diary entries that recount her childhood moving forward.
I have given Before I Let You Go 4 stars because it had me fully emotionally engaged and I felt that the author really did justice to the real time pain, emotions and political, social and legal issues of the situation. Besides the story, the author is overtly trying to raise awareness about how the law treats pregnant women who have addiction issues, and she generally does a good job.
If I focused on literary merit, my rating would likely be lower. It got long and repetitive in places, and it did a bit too much saying rather than showing. But, in fairness, addiction involves lots of waiting, false hopes, guilt and blaming, and the rhythm of the book captures that dynamic really well. While the characters other than Lexie and Annie are a bit simplistic, the dance between Lexie and Annie is really potent. As I say, I found myself fully emotionally engaged in their story and I have a lot of respect for the author’s point of view on the topic she deals with. Her perspective on addiction is not simplistic, and for that reason alone this novel is worthy of attention.
Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read an advance copy.
No, it’s a heartfelt story about sisters, addiction, grief and abuse. Lexie and Annie lost their father as children, after which their mother moved them to a very insular and strict religious community. Lexie left first and then Annie followed her. Flash forward several years and Lexie is a doctor and Annie is pregnant and addicted to heroin. The story is told primarily from Lexie’s perspective starting towards the end of Annie’s pregnancy. There are also a few chapters from Annie’s perspective in the form of diary entries that recount her childhood moving forward.
I have given Before I Let You Go 4 stars because it had me fully emotionally engaged and I felt that the author really did justice to the real time pain, emotions and political, social and legal issues of the situation. Besides the story, the author is overtly trying to raise awareness about how the law treats pregnant women who have addiction issues, and she generally does a good job.
If I focused on literary merit, my rating would likely be lower. It got long and repetitive in places, and it did a bit too much saying rather than showing. But, in fairness, addiction involves lots of waiting, false hopes, guilt and blaming, and the rhythm of the book captures that dynamic really well. While the characters other than Lexie and Annie are a bit simplistic, the dance between Lexie and Annie is really potent. As I say, I found myself fully emotionally engaged in their story and I have a lot of respect for the author’s point of view on the topic she deals with. Her perspective on addiction is not simplistic, and for that reason alone this novel is worthy of attention.
Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read an advance copy.
March 20, 2018
3.5 Stars
Two sisters face some life changing decisions.
Lexie is the older, successful sister and Annie is broke and addicted to drugs. The paths they have chosen couldn’t be more different. Lexie hasn’t been able to save her sister from addiction, but things are different now. Annie is pregnant, and she is asking Lexie for help.
Prepare to have some tissues ready. I was teary eyed at several passages and could feel the emotions that both sisters were experiencing. We get the backstory, some journal entries, and some heartbreaking scenes. Lexie’s story was at times repetitive and seemed to stall the flow of the plot too much for me (which took away from my enjoyment of it).
I placed myself in Lexie’s shoes and kept asking myself what I would have done. It is an important story about addiction and the heart heavy impact it has on families. Themes of abuse, addiction, love and the ability to forgive all make this a thought provoking read.
Thanks to the publisher for my ARC. This was a Traveling Sister Group read with all the lovely ladies.
Two sisters face some life changing decisions.
Lexie is the older, successful sister and Annie is broke and addicted to drugs. The paths they have chosen couldn’t be more different. Lexie hasn’t been able to save her sister from addiction, but things are different now. Annie is pregnant, and she is asking Lexie for help.
Prepare to have some tissues ready. I was teary eyed at several passages and could feel the emotions that both sisters were experiencing. We get the backstory, some journal entries, and some heartbreaking scenes. Lexie’s story was at times repetitive and seemed to stall the flow of the plot too much for me (which took away from my enjoyment of it).
I placed myself in Lexie’s shoes and kept asking myself what I would have done. It is an important story about addiction and the heart heavy impact it has on families. Themes of abuse, addiction, love and the ability to forgive all make this a thought provoking read.
Thanks to the publisher for my ARC. This was a Traveling Sister Group read with all the lovely ladies.
January 29, 2018
I was immediately drawn to the story and characters in this book. Even though it touches on some very sensitive and troubling themes mainly drug abuse, it was well executed to show two sides of the coin. One of drug addict and also the family affected. I found this a honest and realistic portrayal and the two sisters at the core of this story really touched a nerve, the bond and then the destruction of that bond was heartbreaking, I was impressed how the author managed to really capture the topic in such a tender and non judgemental way in showing that drug addiction is a disease and the addicts themselves need understanding, care and ultimately unconditional love but sometimes even those things just aren’t enough, by the end I was literally reduced to tears, but I was not sad I read it. I highly recommend this book but just have some tissues on hand..you’ll need it.
Thank you Netgalley and Hatchette Australia for my early review copy.
Thank you Netgalley and Hatchette Australia for my early review copy.
February 21, 2018
The day Lexie and Annie's father died was the catalyst to change - nothing was the same in the aftermath. Their mother was unable to cope, and Lexie, being the older of the two sisters, took over. She prepared meals, got them both ready for school, did the laundry - she grew up quickly.
Twelve months later Robert appeared in their lives; their mother married him and Lexie and Annie had a step-father they hated. But the bond between the two girls continued to grow with Lexie always there for Annie. When Lexie turned sixteen, she left Annie and her mother, determined to make her way into the future. But what would Annie do? How would she manage without her sister by her side?
Lexie's determination gave her a career where she was a successful doctor, and her fiance Sam was also a doctor. She was happy; contented with her life - but when Annie rang her for help, chaos and trouble followed. Annie's life of addiction was one she hadn't been able to beat - now pregnant, she needed Lexie's help more than ever...
What would be the outcome for Annie and Lexie? For the little baby who would have neonatal abstinence syndrome (NAS) when born? Being doctors, both Lexie and Sam knew and had seen babies affected with NAS - it was horrific. But could Annie put her baby first?
Before I Let You Go by Aussie author Kelly Rimmer was an outstanding, emotional and ultimately horrific story of how life can change in an instant. How love and guilt are entwined forever, and how the decisions one makes can make or break - that fork in the road is never clear. A fast-paced, suspenseful novel that I couldn't put down, Before I Let You Go is one I highly recommend.
With thanks to NetGalley and Hachette AU for my digital ARC to read and review.
Twelve months later Robert appeared in their lives; their mother married him and Lexie and Annie had a step-father they hated. But the bond between the two girls continued to grow with Lexie always there for Annie. When Lexie turned sixteen, she left Annie and her mother, determined to make her way into the future. But what would Annie do? How would she manage without her sister by her side?
Lexie's determination gave her a career where she was a successful doctor, and her fiance Sam was also a doctor. She was happy; contented with her life - but when Annie rang her for help, chaos and trouble followed. Annie's life of addiction was one she hadn't been able to beat - now pregnant, she needed Lexie's help more than ever...
What would be the outcome for Annie and Lexie? For the little baby who would have neonatal abstinence syndrome (NAS) when born? Being doctors, both Lexie and Sam knew and had seen babies affected with NAS - it was horrific. But could Annie put her baby first?
Before I Let You Go by Aussie author Kelly Rimmer was an outstanding, emotional and ultimately horrific story of how life can change in an instant. How love and guilt are entwined forever, and how the decisions one makes can make or break - that fork in the road is never clear. A fast-paced, suspenseful novel that I couldn't put down, Before I Let You Go is one I highly recommend.
With thanks to NetGalley and Hachette AU for my digital ARC to read and review.
September 11, 2019
A Mother with One True Love - Heroin . . .
A Sister Fighting against the Odds. . .
A baby with no choice at all.
March 21, 2018
4.5 heartbreaking stars
This sad yet utterly poignant story illuminates for the reader, all the effects an addiction can do to both the person addicted and the family that surrounds that person.
Lexie and Annie Vidler are sisters growing up in a loving household until tragedy strikes and they are propelled into a nightmare. After the loss of their father, the mother spirals into deep depression until she meets a man Robert who is one of the leaders of a cult like religion which ensnares the mother, who marries Robert, and makes the girls follow along to a village where the cult lives with a nightmare of harsh rules, dress, and elimination of outside contact with the world which rules all their lives. Lexie plays along while Annie revolts with every bone in her body and is subjected to cruelty being beaten and other horrendous things at the hands of Robert, their new father. Lexie escapes and Annie is left to face the horrible situations she is often found in and years later, a total mess with loss of self esteem and pride escapes as well. Is it any wonder that Annie succumbs to the lure of first alcohol and then heroin to dull the hurt and pain.
After becoming a full blown addict, whom Lexie has tried to help through a series of rehabilitation, that never works for Annie, years of no contact go by until one late night Lexie receives a phone call from Annie begging for help for she is pregnant and addicted. Lexie now a doctor, lives with her fiance, Sam, another doctor. They rush to help Annie finally convincing her that for the sake of this child she needs a hospital knowing that the hospital will be forced to alert child protective services of the mother's addiction and the child's state and welfare because of it.
From this point in the story, Annie must be placed once again in rehab. She must continue the program or else she will be placed in prison and lose her child. Lexie and Sam step forward to take the child until Annie completes rehab and the court determines her able to provide for the child. It all depends on Annie. Can she do this? Can she become drug free, responsible, and able to take and provide for a child?
The cards are definitely stacked against her and as through letters written both to her drug counselor and then to Lexie we learn of the tragedies that have occurred to Annie from an uncaring mother so hung up with the cult, to an abusive stepfather we see that Annie is destined to fail. Perhaps this time though will be the charm..
Told with much compassion and a wonderful way of stepping inside the characters presented, Ms Rimmer has written a book that is both tragic and compelling. She writes so well of the ravages addiction puts upon not only the user but the family as well. "Addiction is a hugely complex and destructive disease, and its impact can be simply devastating. All to often lives and families can be shattered." (Kate Middleton) For both Lexie and Annie that shattering of family takes the very life and breath out of them, making for such tragedy and pain as they both grapple with its evil effects.
Thank you to Kelly Rimmer, the publisher, and edelweiss for making an advanced copy of this tragic novel available to me.
Thanks you also to the Traveling sisters who shared the experience of reading this book with me
This sad yet utterly poignant story illuminates for the reader, all the effects an addiction can do to both the person addicted and the family that surrounds that person.
Lexie and Annie Vidler are sisters growing up in a loving household until tragedy strikes and they are propelled into a nightmare. After the loss of their father, the mother spirals into deep depression until she meets a man Robert who is one of the leaders of a cult like religion which ensnares the mother, who marries Robert, and makes the girls follow along to a village where the cult lives with a nightmare of harsh rules, dress, and elimination of outside contact with the world which rules all their lives. Lexie plays along while Annie revolts with every bone in her body and is subjected to cruelty being beaten and other horrendous things at the hands of Robert, their new father. Lexie escapes and Annie is left to face the horrible situations she is often found in and years later, a total mess with loss of self esteem and pride escapes as well. Is it any wonder that Annie succumbs to the lure of first alcohol and then heroin to dull the hurt and pain.
After becoming a full blown addict, whom Lexie has tried to help through a series of rehabilitation, that never works for Annie, years of no contact go by until one late night Lexie receives a phone call from Annie begging for help for she is pregnant and addicted. Lexie now a doctor, lives with her fiance, Sam, another doctor. They rush to help Annie finally convincing her that for the sake of this child she needs a hospital knowing that the hospital will be forced to alert child protective services of the mother's addiction and the child's state and welfare because of it.
From this point in the story, Annie must be placed once again in rehab. She must continue the program or else she will be placed in prison and lose her child. Lexie and Sam step forward to take the child until Annie completes rehab and the court determines her able to provide for the child. It all depends on Annie. Can she do this? Can she become drug free, responsible, and able to take and provide for a child?
The cards are definitely stacked against her and as through letters written both to her drug counselor and then to Lexie we learn of the tragedies that have occurred to Annie from an uncaring mother so hung up with the cult, to an abusive stepfather we see that Annie is destined to fail. Perhaps this time though will be the charm..
Told with much compassion and a wonderful way of stepping inside the characters presented, Ms Rimmer has written a book that is both tragic and compelling. She writes so well of the ravages addiction puts upon not only the user but the family as well. "Addiction is a hugely complex and destructive disease, and its impact can be simply devastating. All to often lives and families can be shattered." (Kate Middleton) For both Lexie and Annie that shattering of family takes the very life and breath out of them, making for such tragedy and pain as they both grapple with its evil effects.
Thank you to Kelly Rimmer, the publisher, and edelweiss for making an advanced copy of this tragic novel available to me.
Thanks you also to the Traveling sisters who shared the experience of reading this book with me
January 22, 2022
This was SO well-written, emotional and heart-breaking. The story of two sisters, Anna, who struggles with addiction, and Lexi, who struggles with how to be emotionally honest with those around her. Anna calls in the night, pregnant and medically in trouble. The two sisters are drawn back together in yet another attempt to help Anna’s sobriety stick, this time with a third life in the mix. Told in dual perspectives and dual timelines with Lexi narrating in the present, and Anna telling the heartbreaking story of their past, this is one of the best books of the disease of addiction and its effect on families.
Trigger Warnings:
Please excuse typos/name misspellings. Entered on screen reader.
Trigger Warnings:
Please excuse typos/name misspellings. Entered on screen reader.
January 24, 2025
4.5 Stars heartbreaking stars 😭💔
I lost count of how many times I cried while reading this book. I truly wasn’t prepared for the raw emotional weight it carries. This story is not just heartbreaking, it’s gut-wrenching in the most profound way. It’s an unflinching exploration of addiction, showing how it doesn’t just tear apart the addict, but everyone who loves them. The author crafts a deeply compassionate and powerful narrative that’s both thought-provoking and painfully real. The subject matter of addiction is handled with such sensitivity, yet it doesn’t shy away from its darkest corners.
At the heart of this story are two sisters: Lexie, a successful doctor who seems to have it all together, and Annie, her pregnant sister battling a heroin addiction. The alternating perspectives, Lexie’s in the present and Annie’s in the past, create a poignant contrast, pulling you deeper into their complicated lives. The story peels back the layers of their difficult, unconventional upbringing, revealing family secrets that shake their already fragile bond. I couldn’t help but feel every ounce of the sister’s anguish as the story navigates the unbearable tension between love and resentment, forgiveness and blame, hope and despair. It’s a painful journey, and the author doesn’t let you look away. I found myself struggling right alongside Lexie, caught in the emotional turmoil of wanting to save someone you love but realizing you can’t fix everything. This book is a gut-punch, but it’s also a testament to the complexities of family, love, and the scars that addiction leaves behind. It’s beautifully written, heartbreakingly honest, and one of those stories that stays with you long after you finish reading.
Definitely check content warnings before reading this one 😭
I lost count of how many times I cried while reading this book. I truly wasn’t prepared for the raw emotional weight it carries. This story is not just heartbreaking, it’s gut-wrenching in the most profound way. It’s an unflinching exploration of addiction, showing how it doesn’t just tear apart the addict, but everyone who loves them. The author crafts a deeply compassionate and powerful narrative that’s both thought-provoking and painfully real. The subject matter of addiction is handled with such sensitivity, yet it doesn’t shy away from its darkest corners.
At the heart of this story are two sisters: Lexie, a successful doctor who seems to have it all together, and Annie, her pregnant sister battling a heroin addiction. The alternating perspectives, Lexie’s in the present and Annie’s in the past, create a poignant contrast, pulling you deeper into their complicated lives. The story peels back the layers of their difficult, unconventional upbringing, revealing family secrets that shake their already fragile bond. I couldn’t help but feel every ounce of the sister’s anguish as the story navigates the unbearable tension between love and resentment, forgiveness and blame, hope and despair. It’s a painful journey, and the author doesn’t let you look away. I found myself struggling right alongside Lexie, caught in the emotional turmoil of wanting to save someone you love but realizing you can’t fix everything. This book is a gut-punch, but it’s also a testament to the complexities of family, love, and the scars that addiction leaves behind. It’s beautifully written, heartbreakingly honest, and one of those stories that stays with you long after you finish reading.
Definitely check content warnings before reading this one 😭
June 24, 2018
This book should firstly come with a warning that it has an emotional punch that even Rocky would be proud of.
It starts with a moral dilemma, how far would you go to help a sibling? Is blood thicker than water?
Lexie is contacted by her sister Annie as she needs help, she is pregnant and hooked on drugs, desperate for help but afraid to go to the hospital as social services will take her unborn baby away.
I started this book disliking Annie and finding her weak, but I had forgotten you shouldn’t judge somebody by how they look or how they initially act until you know what they are going through. (first impressions can definitely be deceiving)
The moral of this book for me was sometimes you can’t help somebody unless they ask for help and if that is when they reach rock bottom you just have to be patient.
The story of Annie’s descent into drugs was beautifully written and will tug at anyone’s heart strings. I read this in the bath with tears streaming down my face!
Definitely the most emotive read this year.
Thank you to netgalley for my copy in exchange for a review.
It starts with a moral dilemma, how far would you go to help a sibling? Is blood thicker than water?
Lexie is contacted by her sister Annie as she needs help, she is pregnant and hooked on drugs, desperate for help but afraid to go to the hospital as social services will take her unborn baby away.
I started this book disliking Annie and finding her weak, but I had forgotten you shouldn’t judge somebody by how they look or how they initially act until you know what they are going through. (first impressions can definitely be deceiving)
The moral of this book for me was sometimes you can’t help somebody unless they ask for help and if that is when they reach rock bottom you just have to be patient.
The story of Annie’s descent into drugs was beautifully written and will tug at anyone’s heart strings. I read this in the bath with tears streaming down my face!
Definitely the most emotive read this year.
Thank you to netgalley for my copy in exchange for a review.
September 3, 2021
Every time I read a book by this author she tugs my heartstrings.
She really knows how to open a readers heart to allow the characters to enter, that’s where they remain inside of you while you experience every conceivable emotion, reaction, pain, sorrow and joy that they do.
An amazing read!
She really knows how to open a readers heart to allow the characters to enter, that’s where they remain inside of you while you experience every conceivable emotion, reaction, pain, sorrow and joy that they do.
An amazing read!
April 19, 2018
4.5 Stars
Two sisters, two very different life outcomes. Lexie is a doctor engaged to Sam who is also a doctor. Annie is a drug addict. Lexie is not surprised when she gets a call for help, from Annie, in the middle of the night. It’s not the first time it has happened. But now Annie is pregnant and that changes everything.
”There is no off switch to the love between sisters” - Lexie Vidler
Who isn’t intrigued by dysfunctional family stories! I could clearly see from the Facebook discussion for this book that so many readers could relate to the sisters on different levels – unparented children (when the parent is not mentally present), drug abuse, sibling connections.
The story is set in Alabama where there are strict laws on drug use in pregnancy and any woman who is reported with drugs in their system whilst pregnant faces criminal charges for child endangerment with a penalty of a jail term. This causes a moral dilemma for Lexie. Should she protect her sister from authorities or protect the unborn child.
”What Annie is facing is a nightmare – but she is my sister. I’d never want her to face this alone.” - Lexie Vidler
Lexie has brought Annie up since the sudden death of their father when their mother became mentally detached from the world. Lexie saw every one of Annie’s problems as a failure and she needed to fix it. Lexie was not used to accepting help and kept shutting Sam out however Sam was sensitive and supportive, never judgemental, he knew how to rein Lexie in when she was going too far. I was so glad that Rimmer didn’t disappoint me and Sam stayed a constant until the end. *sigh*
Lexie and Annie’s story is intense and relatable, it will make you angry and break your heart; it opens up a lot of moral issues for discussion.
The dual narration, present day told by Lexie and the past through Annie’s journal entries, had this reader switching allegiances as the full story was revealed.
I will finish with this quote from Annie. It just killed me.
” How many thousands of dollars do you sink into a person before it stops being selfless and starts being ridiculous? How many times do you bother to revive someone who is nothing but a drain on you and society?” – Annie Vidler.
What if this was your sister or brother, your own child? Would you ever stop helping someone you love?
Two sisters, two very different life outcomes. Lexie is a doctor engaged to Sam who is also a doctor. Annie is a drug addict. Lexie is not surprised when she gets a call for help, from Annie, in the middle of the night. It’s not the first time it has happened. But now Annie is pregnant and that changes everything.
”There is no off switch to the love between sisters” - Lexie Vidler
Who isn’t intrigued by dysfunctional family stories! I could clearly see from the Facebook discussion for this book that so many readers could relate to the sisters on different levels – unparented children (when the parent is not mentally present), drug abuse, sibling connections.
The story is set in Alabama where there are strict laws on drug use in pregnancy and any woman who is reported with drugs in their system whilst pregnant faces criminal charges for child endangerment with a penalty of a jail term. This causes a moral dilemma for Lexie. Should she protect her sister from authorities or protect the unborn child.
”What Annie is facing is a nightmare – but she is my sister. I’d never want her to face this alone.” - Lexie Vidler
Lexie has brought Annie up since the sudden death of their father when their mother became mentally detached from the world. Lexie saw every one of Annie’s problems as a failure and she needed to fix it. Lexie was not used to accepting help and kept shutting Sam out however Sam was sensitive and supportive, never judgemental, he knew how to rein Lexie in when she was going too far. I was so glad that Rimmer didn’t disappoint me and Sam stayed a constant until the end. *sigh*
Lexie and Annie’s story is intense and relatable, it will make you angry and break your heart; it opens up a lot of moral issues for discussion.
The dual narration, present day told by Lexie and the past through Annie’s journal entries, had this reader switching allegiances as the full story was revealed.
I will finish with this quote from Annie. It just killed me.
” How many thousands of dollars do you sink into a person before it stops being selfless and starts being ridiculous? How many times do you bother to revive someone who is nothing but a drain on you and society?” – Annie Vidler.
What if this was your sister or brother, your own child? Would you ever stop helping someone you love?
October 11, 2018
Sisters Lexie and Annie were very close to one another growing up. After the death of their father the girl's suddenly had to fend for themselves as their mother was finding it hard enough just trying to take care of herself. Lexie quickly took care of running the household, arranging meals, trying to keep the house tidy and making sure the girl's got to school each day.
Their mother remarried, but the girls couldn't warm to their stepfather, Robert at all so much so that they in fact hated him. Lexie and Annie's close bond remained, but once Lexie turned sixteen she left home wanting to form a life of her own. She wasn't sure how Annie would cope being left with her mother and stepfather, but she needed to go away.
Over the years Lexie worked hard on building a career and a new life for herself. Now a successful doctor and happily engaged to Sam. Lexie hadn't heard from her sister Annie in a few years, so when she gets a call from her in the early hours of the morning she knows something is wrong. Lexie quickly discovers her sister is in deep trouble and needs her help. Can Lexie save Annie or has years of addiction done too much harm?
This is a very powerful read and one that will stay with you long after you've read it. Emotional, heart wrenching and unputdownable is just a few words that first come to mind in describing this brilliantly written book. Highly recommended.
Their mother remarried, but the girls couldn't warm to their stepfather, Robert at all so much so that they in fact hated him. Lexie and Annie's close bond remained, but once Lexie turned sixteen she left home wanting to form a life of her own. She wasn't sure how Annie would cope being left with her mother and stepfather, but she needed to go away.
Over the years Lexie worked hard on building a career and a new life for herself. Now a successful doctor and happily engaged to Sam. Lexie hadn't heard from her sister Annie in a few years, so when she gets a call from her in the early hours of the morning she knows something is wrong. Lexie quickly discovers her sister is in deep trouble and needs her help. Can Lexie save Annie or has years of addiction done too much harm?
This is a very powerful read and one that will stay with you long after you've read it. Emotional, heart wrenching and unputdownable is just a few words that first come to mind in describing this brilliantly written book. Highly recommended.
October 10, 2021
4 Stars
Family, religion, drugs, the legal system, and putting everything on the line when you have no idea what the best choice is . . .
This is a “What would you do if faced with a difficult decision” story. And, with multiple lives and the future at stake, the reader is left with a lot to keep them occupied throughout. I think fans of family-based drama (specifically people with close sisterly-bonds) will be enthralled by this story. In fact, if you have sisters and your relationship with them is strained, this book could hit very close to home for you.
Overall, this book is gut-wrenching – but it was the difficulty of the circumstances that kept me intrigued. Be aware that if you are sensitive, there is a lot here that might be tough to swallow. But, if you can, in the end the whole package is rewarding and will leave you with a lot to think about.
Family, religion, drugs, the legal system, and putting everything on the line when you have no idea what the best choice is . . .
This is a “What would you do if faced with a difficult decision” story. And, with multiple lives and the future at stake, the reader is left with a lot to keep them occupied throughout. I think fans of family-based drama (specifically people with close sisterly-bonds) will be enthralled by this story. In fact, if you have sisters and your relationship with them is strained, this book could hit very close to home for you.
Overall, this book is gut-wrenching – but it was the difficulty of the circumstances that kept me intrigued. Be aware that if you are sensitive, there is a lot here that might be tough to swallow. But, if you can, in the end the whole package is rewarding and will leave you with a lot to think about.
October 14, 2018
*https://mrsbbookreviews.wordpress.com
Kelly Rimmer is an author who is unafraid to tackle a very topical and relevant issue in our current world climate, drug addiction. In her new novel, Before I Let You Go, Rimmer places a microscope on drug addiction, the way it is perceived by others, how it is treated in the health profession, what laws surround it and how family members choose to deal with it. It is an edgy and illuminating novel that uses the strong bond between two sisters to unfurl an emotionally complex story.
Sometimes when you read a book you just inherently know that it will remain by your side for a long time to come. I have this gut feeling about Before I Let You Go, by Kelly Rimmer. I’m just so pleased I have discovered this brand new author (to me). It is a thought provoking read that challenges the very core of your moral thinking. Most of all, Before I Let You Go presents a warts and all view of addiction. There is a strong human element to the main character, Annie’s addiction and this is an account of addiction I have not experienced previously. It definitely challenged my own personal viewpoint on addiction, which I appreciated. Kelly Rimmer has produced a resolute piece of writing. Rimmer is now a writer that firmly sits on my watch list and I hold her writing in very high regard.
Rimmer structures her latest novel in an interesting and highly engaging manner. We shift between two main perspectives through the book. In the present, we follow Lexie, as Annie crash lands back into her life, with the news that she is expecting a child anytime soon. In the past, we learn about Annie’s tragic past via journal entries she composes while in rehabilitation. This gives the reader a perfect insight into Annie’s frame of mind and helps to flesh out the reasons for Annie’s addiction. As well as putting the spotlight on the bond between two sisters who have shared so much, Before I Let You Go also includes an interesting by line on religious cults and the influence of the girl’s stepfather in this area of the novel. It added yet another layer to this morally complex tale. The plot is thick and it offers up so much fodder to discuss in book club situations.
Before I Let You Go also zones in on addiction and the various health professionals, lawyers, hospital staff and mental health professional involved in combating this illness. I feel there is a strong overarching theme on relationships. Rimmer presents relationships in many different forms in this novel, from the love between Lexie and Sam, to the sisterly bond between Lexie and Annie. Rimmer also looks the dysfunctional relationship between Lexie and Annie and their mother. Finally, when Annie’s baby girl enters the world, Rimmer helps us see how a new baby fits into the fold. I found these passages so very real, taking me back to my own newborn experiences with my children. However, Before I Let You Go is a whole different ball game. Lexie becomes an instant mother and she must contend with a newborn who is still working through the withdrawal process. Rimmer presents this with insight and sensitivity.
As a newcomer to Rimmer’s writing style I appreciated it very much. She has a great command of language, her writing is assured, but also stark and to the point. I was drawn into Before I Let You Go from the opening and I continued to turn page after page over, in the hope that Annie would be able to start a new life with her baby daughter. I don’t want to say too much more about this aspect of the novel as I don’t want to spoil it for potential readers. It is heartbreaking, raw and reflective of our current age of addiction. I wish we understood more about this illness in order to better help sufferers like Annie. The system that is present in some states in the US, where pregnant drug users find their children are taken away from them and are issued with jail time, is a different approach to managing this disease. I had not heard of until I read Before I Let You Go. I thank Kelly Rimmer for drawing my attention to this rule of law.
So many feelings ran through me while reading Before I Let You Go. I shifted the blame and my sympathy levels a number of times. But, what resonated with me most, was a heartbreaking scene when Annie faced such obvious prejudice, being labelled simply as a ‘junkie’. Often we see drug users in this light and we forget that they are someone’s loved one, sister, daughter, mother or aunty. It is truly heartbreaking, not just the user, but those who surround them. Rimmer works to highlight this in her novel, perhaps informed by her own family experiences of seeing her uncle suffer and succumb to serious drug addiction.
Before I Let You Go is a book that commands your attention and compels you to tread the emotionally fraught moral line in terms of addiction and pregnant users. The frank writing style, the here and now setting, combined with authentic relationships between the two sisters featured in this novel, makes Before I Let You Go a book I recommend many times over.
Before I Let You Go, is book #125 of the Australian Women Writers Challenge
Kelly Rimmer is an author who is unafraid to tackle a very topical and relevant issue in our current world climate, drug addiction. In her new novel, Before I Let You Go, Rimmer places a microscope on drug addiction, the way it is perceived by others, how it is treated in the health profession, what laws surround it and how family members choose to deal with it. It is an edgy and illuminating novel that uses the strong bond between two sisters to unfurl an emotionally complex story.
Sometimes when you read a book you just inherently know that it will remain by your side for a long time to come. I have this gut feeling about Before I Let You Go, by Kelly Rimmer. I’m just so pleased I have discovered this brand new author (to me). It is a thought provoking read that challenges the very core of your moral thinking. Most of all, Before I Let You Go presents a warts and all view of addiction. There is a strong human element to the main character, Annie’s addiction and this is an account of addiction I have not experienced previously. It definitely challenged my own personal viewpoint on addiction, which I appreciated. Kelly Rimmer has produced a resolute piece of writing. Rimmer is now a writer that firmly sits on my watch list and I hold her writing in very high regard.
Rimmer structures her latest novel in an interesting and highly engaging manner. We shift between two main perspectives through the book. In the present, we follow Lexie, as Annie crash lands back into her life, with the news that she is expecting a child anytime soon. In the past, we learn about Annie’s tragic past via journal entries she composes while in rehabilitation. This gives the reader a perfect insight into Annie’s frame of mind and helps to flesh out the reasons for Annie’s addiction. As well as putting the spotlight on the bond between two sisters who have shared so much, Before I Let You Go also includes an interesting by line on religious cults and the influence of the girl’s stepfather in this area of the novel. It added yet another layer to this morally complex tale. The plot is thick and it offers up so much fodder to discuss in book club situations.
Before I Let You Go also zones in on addiction and the various health professionals, lawyers, hospital staff and mental health professional involved in combating this illness. I feel there is a strong overarching theme on relationships. Rimmer presents relationships in many different forms in this novel, from the love between Lexie and Sam, to the sisterly bond between Lexie and Annie. Rimmer also looks the dysfunctional relationship between Lexie and Annie and their mother. Finally, when Annie’s baby girl enters the world, Rimmer helps us see how a new baby fits into the fold. I found these passages so very real, taking me back to my own newborn experiences with my children. However, Before I Let You Go is a whole different ball game. Lexie becomes an instant mother and she must contend with a newborn who is still working through the withdrawal process. Rimmer presents this with insight and sensitivity.
As a newcomer to Rimmer’s writing style I appreciated it very much. She has a great command of language, her writing is assured, but also stark and to the point. I was drawn into Before I Let You Go from the opening and I continued to turn page after page over, in the hope that Annie would be able to start a new life with her baby daughter. I don’t want to say too much more about this aspect of the novel as I don’t want to spoil it for potential readers. It is heartbreaking, raw and reflective of our current age of addiction. I wish we understood more about this illness in order to better help sufferers like Annie. The system that is present in some states in the US, where pregnant drug users find their children are taken away from them and are issued with jail time, is a different approach to managing this disease. I had not heard of until I read Before I Let You Go. I thank Kelly Rimmer for drawing my attention to this rule of law.
So many feelings ran through me while reading Before I Let You Go. I shifted the blame and my sympathy levels a number of times. But, what resonated with me most, was a heartbreaking scene when Annie faced such obvious prejudice, being labelled simply as a ‘junkie’. Often we see drug users in this light and we forget that they are someone’s loved one, sister, daughter, mother or aunty. It is truly heartbreaking, not just the user, but those who surround them. Rimmer works to highlight this in her novel, perhaps informed by her own family experiences of seeing her uncle suffer and succumb to serious drug addiction.
Before I Let You Go is a book that commands your attention and compels you to tread the emotionally fraught moral line in terms of addiction and pregnant users. The frank writing style, the here and now setting, combined with authentic relationships between the two sisters featured in this novel, makes Before I Let You Go a book I recommend many times over.
Before I Let You Go, is book #125 of the Australian Women Writers Challenge
December 14, 2018
4.5 Stars
"She is not a junkie," I choke. "She is my sister."
Bring on the tears...this was a good read!
"She is not a junkie," I choke. "She is my sister."
Bring on the tears...this was a good read!
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