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101 Uses for a Dead Cat
Since time immemorial mankind has been plagued by the question "What do you do with a dead cat?" Here, at last, in 101 hilarious, outrageous, and (sometimes) downright sick cartoons, are some answers. 101 black-and-white illustrations.
96 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1981
2 people are currently reading
217 people want to read
About the author
Simon Bond
40 books2 followersFrom the "Guardian" obtiuary:
Simon Patrick Everett Bond was born of British parents on 19 August 1947 in New York City. He was the second son of Terence Bond, a political secretary at the United Nations, and Hilda Everett. The family returned to England when he was four. In London, he attended Preston Manor County Grammar School, Wembley, before studying graphics at West Sussex College of Art and Design in Worthing (1965–68). His first job was as a paste-up artist on Tatler magazine (1969–70) before returning to the US on health grounds.
For more than a decade he lived in Phoenix, Arizona, where the climate was better suited to his chronic asthma. He then worked in a variety of jobs, including dealing in antiquarian prints and pictures and performing stand-up comedy in clubs while also contributing cartoons to the Saturday Evening Post, Esquire, National Lampoon, New Yorker, Men Only and Vole.
In 1976 he published his first book, Real Funny (1976), and soon afterwards mentioned the idea for a macabre cartoon book about dead cats to his friend, Terry Jones of Monty Python, who he had met in London. Jones liked the idea and recommended it to the British publisher Methuen, who published it as 101 Uses of a Dead Cat (1981). The book was an instant and enduring success, eventually selling more than two million copies and being published in 20 countries. Despite frequent attacks by cat lovers (Time magazine called him "the Charles Addams of ailurophobia"), Bond always maintained that he meant no harm by the book and was not only fond of cats but had even owned four himself at various times (as well as a dog); the only problem was that he was allergic to them.
At first he had no plans for a follow-up cat book and concentrated on a screenplay, Shorts, satirising the media, and another cartoon collection for Methuen, Unspeakable Acts (1982). However, in 1982 he returned to London, began contributing to Punch and Private Eye, and produced a new cat collection, 101 More Uses of a Dead Cat (1982) with tie-in calendars appearing in 1983 and 1984.
In 1985 he married Linda Marshall, and moved to the Jacobean Great Addington Manor near Kettering in Northamptonshire. Here he continued to produce at least one cartoon book a year, including Uses of a Dead Cat in History (1992). In 2001, to mark the 20th anniversary of the first book, Methuen published Complete Uses of a Dead Cat (2001), incorporating all three volumes. In 1993 Bond and his wife moved to Langer, Nottingham.
In all he published more than 20 collections of drawings, including Odd Visions and Bizarre Sights (1983), Uniformity (1986), A Bruise of Bouncers (1987), Battered Lawyers and Other Good Ideas (1989), Odd Dogs (1989), Holy Unacceptable (1990), Commuted to Life (1992), Everybody's Doing It (1993) and three children's books featuring the teddy bear Tough Ted. He also illustrated two books by Alan Abel, Don't Get Mad, Get Even! A Manual for Retaliation (1983) and How to Thrive on Rejection: A Manual for Survival (1985), as well as Percy Richer's Richer's Legal Nuggets (1987) and Tom Isitt's Secrets of the Queen's Closet (1988). His last published book was 101 Uses of a Dead Roach (2002) with an "epitaph" by the celebrity drug-dealer Howard "Mr Nice" Marks.
Bond, who once said that he loved thinking up ideas but truly hated drawing, usually sketched his cartoons with a 2H pencil on A4 cartridge paper, working up the finished drawing with a fine Edding needlepoint nylon-tip pen. However, for his bookwork he tended to draw actual size. He never used washes, tints or cross-hatching, preferring to draw up-and-down lines for shadows. For colour work he preferred coloured pencils.
Below average height, he spoke with a soft English accent and usually wore spectacles. He was a keen collector of antiques and was also very interested in sport, especially cricket and football (Nottingham Forest FC).
Simon Patrick Everett Bond was born of British parents on 19 August 1947 in New York City. He was the second son of Terence Bond, a political secretary at the United Nations, and Hilda Everett. The family returned to England when he was four. In London, he attended Preston Manor County Grammar School, Wembley, before studying graphics at West Sussex College of Art and Design in Worthing (1965–68). His first job was as a paste-up artist on Tatler magazine (1969–70) before returning to the US on health grounds.
For more than a decade he lived in Phoenix, Arizona, where the climate was better suited to his chronic asthma. He then worked in a variety of jobs, including dealing in antiquarian prints and pictures and performing stand-up comedy in clubs while also contributing cartoons to the Saturday Evening Post, Esquire, National Lampoon, New Yorker, Men Only and Vole.
In 1976 he published his first book, Real Funny (1976), and soon afterwards mentioned the idea for a macabre cartoon book about dead cats to his friend, Terry Jones of Monty Python, who he had met in London. Jones liked the idea and recommended it to the British publisher Methuen, who published it as 101 Uses of a Dead Cat (1981). The book was an instant and enduring success, eventually selling more than two million copies and being published in 20 countries. Despite frequent attacks by cat lovers (Time magazine called him "the Charles Addams of ailurophobia"), Bond always maintained that he meant no harm by the book and was not only fond of cats but had even owned four himself at various times (as well as a dog); the only problem was that he was allergic to them.
At first he had no plans for a follow-up cat book and concentrated on a screenplay, Shorts, satirising the media, and another cartoon collection for Methuen, Unspeakable Acts (1982). However, in 1982 he returned to London, began contributing to Punch and Private Eye, and produced a new cat collection, 101 More Uses of a Dead Cat (1982) with tie-in calendars appearing in 1983 and 1984.
In 1985 he married Linda Marshall, and moved to the Jacobean Great Addington Manor near Kettering in Northamptonshire. Here he continued to produce at least one cartoon book a year, including Uses of a Dead Cat in History (1992). In 2001, to mark the 20th anniversary of the first book, Methuen published Complete Uses of a Dead Cat (2001), incorporating all three volumes. In 1993 Bond and his wife moved to Langer, Nottingham.
In all he published more than 20 collections of drawings, including Odd Visions and Bizarre Sights (1983), Uniformity (1986), A Bruise of Bouncers (1987), Battered Lawyers and Other Good Ideas (1989), Odd Dogs (1989), Holy Unacceptable (1990), Commuted to Life (1992), Everybody's Doing It (1993) and three children's books featuring the teddy bear Tough Ted. He also illustrated two books by Alan Abel, Don't Get Mad, Get Even! A Manual for Retaliation (1983) and How to Thrive on Rejection: A Manual for Survival (1985), as well as Percy Richer's Richer's Legal Nuggets (1987) and Tom Isitt's Secrets of the Queen's Closet (1988). His last published book was 101 Uses of a Dead Roach (2002) with an "epitaph" by the celebrity drug-dealer Howard "Mr Nice" Marks.
Bond, who once said that he loved thinking up ideas but truly hated drawing, usually sketched his cartoons with a 2H pencil on A4 cartridge paper, working up the finished drawing with a fine Edding needlepoint nylon-tip pen. However, for his bookwork he tended to draw actual size. He never used washes, tints or cross-hatching, preferring to draw up-and-down lines for shadows. For colour work he preferred coloured pencils.
Below average height, he spoke with a soft English accent and usually wore spectacles. He was a keen collector of antiques and was also very interested in sport, especially cricket and football (Nottingham Forest FC).
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 53 reviews
June 28, 2023
I am a cat lover, and I admit that the content of this book is creative, but I did not find it interesting or funny. Simply because I find the idea of using a cat carcass to do something absurd.
March 17, 2012
Maslow, Fanci, and Ashley wandered over to the thin red book lying on the floor.
Maslow, the smartest of the three cats, tried to read the title, "D-E-A-D C-A-T"
Ashley pricked up her ears "CATS! It's about cats."
Fanci turned a few pages, 'It's about dead cats, I think."
Maslow sneered, "Who would want a dead cat? We're a lot cuddlier when we're alive.
Fanci sneered back, "You're a lot fatter when you're alive".
"Hey, I'm not fat. I'm fluffy!"
AshLey kept looking at the pictures, "It seems we cats are a lot more useful dead than alive."
Fanci laughed, "Keep at it, Ash. At 17 years old, you'll soon be finding out."
"I'm a indoor cat."
"So?"
"You're an outdoor cat."
"And your point?"
It's a well known fact that indoor cats live much longer. While I'm eating salmon, you'll be a golf club."
Fanci snarled, "And I hear your mama's a rug in a cathouse!"
Before the fur started flying, Maslow interrupted, "Wait guys. What if this book is for real? Someday we could be life preservers or worse. What happens to us after we're gone?"
They all turned to me.
I smiled, "Don't worry, kitties. You will have a long life and be well loved."
Fanci asked, "But what will you do when we're gone?
"I'll get a puppy"
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK!
Two days later, they crawled out from under the bed.
Maslow, the smartest of the three cats, tried to read the title, "D-E-A-D C-A-T"
Ashley pricked up her ears "CATS! It's about cats."
Fanci turned a few pages, 'It's about dead cats, I think."
Maslow sneered, "Who would want a dead cat? We're a lot cuddlier when we're alive.
Fanci sneered back, "You're a lot fatter when you're alive".
"Hey, I'm not fat. I'm fluffy!"
AshLey kept looking at the pictures, "It seems we cats are a lot more useful dead than alive."
Fanci laughed, "Keep at it, Ash. At 17 years old, you'll soon be finding out."
"I'm a indoor cat."
"So?"
"You're an outdoor cat."
"And your point?"
It's a well known fact that indoor cats live much longer. While I'm eating salmon, you'll be a golf club."
Fanci snarled, "And I hear your mama's a rug in a cathouse!"
Before the fur started flying, Maslow interrupted, "Wait guys. What if this book is for real? Someday we could be life preservers or worse. What happens to us after we're gone?"
They all turned to me.
I smiled, "Don't worry, kitties. You will have a long life and be well loved."
Fanci asked, "But what will you do when we're gone?
"I'll get a puppy"
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK!
Two days later, they crawled out from under the bed.
January 27, 2012
I remember when this book was EVERYWHERE! And then there were a bunch of knock-offs: "101 Uses for a Dead This" "101 uses for a Dead That."
So some of the uses for dead cats were clever, although not exactly funny. I like cats, so the idea of making them useful after they are dead is just pretty awful to me. And really, those dead cats would start stinking pretty fast unless they were embalmed.
So some of the uses for dead cats were clever, although not exactly funny. I like cats, so the idea of making them useful after they are dead is just pretty awful to me. And really, those dead cats would start stinking pretty fast unless they were embalmed.
June 13, 2010
My friend got this for me as a joke and maybe I'm just too uptight and/or too in love with cats but I didn't really think this was that funny.
March 4, 2012
So many ideas for when my cat gets too annoying! :D
June 1, 2025
Garbage. Let this be a lesson to me, any book my father-in-law thinks is funny, is absolute shit.
October 10, 2013
I saw this & remember reading it when I was 10 or so. My mom (who's an avid cat-lover) bought it or got it as a gift. It's similar to those Far Side joke/comic books which were also popular at the time. Single picture joke books that were mildly amusing & contained maybe 2 or 3 really funny ones. For some reason I can only remember one of the uses for dead cats. A pic of a lady wearing two dead cats as oven mitts (yes, her hands were up their bums).
Now remember, I'm an animal lover. I never condone animal cruelty & this book doesn't promote killing cats. I've developed an aversion to cats because they cause me to have an extreme allergic reaction. My mom has the most doglike, playful cat I've ever met. His name is Mojo & he's a gigantic cat with a gigantic fur coat. My dad seriously uses one of those razor brushes (for dogs!) that pull out the undercoat to thin Mojo's fluffiness. Weekly. You could knit sweaters with his fur. They vacuum, have air purifiers, etc. and I still get red-eyed & wheezy. That stuff is so fine it floats in the air! All this & I STILL LOVE MOJO. I just can't touch him or breathe the air around him. I can tell that it hurts my mom's feelings, like I hate her kid or something. Any-hoo, I hope this assures my cat loving friends that I'm not a hater. This book is just silly, not violent.
Now remember, I'm an animal lover. I never condone animal cruelty & this book doesn't promote killing cats. I've developed an aversion to cats because they cause me to have an extreme allergic reaction. My mom has the most doglike, playful cat I've ever met. His name is Mojo & he's a gigantic cat with a gigantic fur coat. My dad seriously uses one of those razor brushes (for dogs!) that pull out the undercoat to thin Mojo's fluffiness. Weekly. You could knit sweaters with his fur. They vacuum, have air purifiers, etc. and I still get red-eyed & wheezy. That stuff is so fine it floats in the air! All this & I STILL LOVE MOJO. I just can't touch him or breathe the air around him. I can tell that it hurts my mom's feelings, like I hate her kid or something. Any-hoo, I hope this assures my cat loving friends that I'm not a hater. This book is just silly, not violent.
February 26, 2018
Prý tohle není knížka pro majitele koček - no nevím, kočku doma máme (byť takovou polodivokou, co celé noci trajdá po venku a nosí před domovní dveře baterie myší), ale já se tedy královsky pobavila. Nejvíc se u toho ale nařechtala naše šestiletá dcera, která bez Micinky nedá ani ránu a je to její nejlepší kamarádka. Takže pokud přistoupíte na ten trošku morbidní koncept, tak se u řady kreseb opravdu pobavíte, někdy se nebudete stačit divit, kam na to ten autor chodí a občas pokrčíte rameny s hláškou "a co jako." U nás převážily ty první dvě možnosti a vím, že než tohle do knihovny vrátím, tak se u toho s dcerou ještě hodně nasmějeme :-)
Pocitově někde mezi třemi a čtyřmi hvězdičkami, ale dceřino nadšení to zlomilo na ty čtyři.
Kontext: Tahle výpůjčka z knihovny byla primárně omyl - stála jsem před regálem s komiksy, koukala, co by mě zaujalo a nějak mi to nesepnulo, takže jsem si myslela, že je tohle knížka ze série Simon's Cat :-)
Pocitově někde mezi třemi a čtyřmi hvězdičkami, ale dceřino nadšení to zlomilo na ty čtyři.
Kontext: Tahle výpůjčka z knihovny byla primárně omyl - stála jsem před regálem s komiksy, koukala, co by mě zaujalo a nějak mi to nesepnulo, takže jsem si myslela, že je tohle knížka ze série Simon's Cat :-)
April 4, 2020
4 🌟
Finished in just 10 minutes, but will remember it for lifetime. A cat lover might find it offensive, but the book is just full of humourous absurd cartoons depicting use of a dead cat. Explored truly a ingenious way to express creativity and art. :)
Finished in just 10 minutes, but will remember it for lifetime. A cat lover might find it offensive, but the book is just full of humourous absurd cartoons depicting use of a dead cat. Explored truly a ingenious way to express creativity and art. :)
June 21, 2019
This little book was loaned to me by a fellow woodcarver, John Panhorst, saying he thought I might enjoy it. And enjoy it I did! Took me all of maybe 20 minutes to “read,” with a smile/smirk/grimace on my face.
I’ll start with a warning: You gotta have a sort of sideways sense of humor to appreciate the book, especially if you’re a cat lover (the author acknowledges he’s allergic to them). All 101 drawings have no captions or speech balloons, so it doesn’t take you long to go through it.
So there are depictions of such things as paws being used as pencil holders (and, relatedly, a cat pencil sharpener (guess where the pencil goes); cats as ice skates; cats as oven mitts; cats as golf clubs; and the list goes on and on, resulting for me in LOL and grimace, sometimes at the same time.
There is even an alphabetical index of said uses with reference to said pages, adding to the hilarity. All in all, a very clever, original-if-at-times-quite-cringeworthy collection. Apparently, there are more such books, which I will duly seek out and make reports thereon. Four stars for Mr. Bond, and my thanks to Mr. Panhorst.
I’ll start with a warning: You gotta have a sort of sideways sense of humor to appreciate the book, especially if you’re a cat lover (the author acknowledges he’s allergic to them). All 101 drawings have no captions or speech balloons, so it doesn’t take you long to go through it.
So there are depictions of such things as paws being used as pencil holders (and, relatedly, a cat pencil sharpener (guess where the pencil goes); cats as ice skates; cats as oven mitts; cats as golf clubs; and the list goes on and on, resulting for me in LOL and grimace, sometimes at the same time.
There is even an alphabetical index of said uses with reference to said pages, adding to the hilarity. All in all, a very clever, original-if-at-times-quite-cringeworthy collection. Apparently, there are more such books, which I will duly seek out and make reports thereon. Four stars for Mr. Bond, and my thanks to Mr. Panhorst.
March 24, 2022
The authors bio says he is allergic to cats, which makes using their dead bodies as oven mitts even more comical.
July 8, 2014
Ah, you don't seem to run into nearly as many dead critter jokes as you used to. Well, there's The Book of Bunny Suicides. Let's hear it for sick humor!
March 11, 2017
I've had this book for a lot of years and I can't remember when or where I got it. It's just a collection of cartoons, each picture depicting a use for a dead cat. I really like cats so I certainly wouldn't want to be using a dead cat for anything. But I do also at times have a bit of a twisted sense of humour, which you've got to have if you're going to enjoy or even want to flick through this book. Some are funnier than others, as with all collections. An amusing five minutes...
January 3, 2018
Is this book filled with terribly awful things to do to dead cats? Yes. Is it funny? depends on your feelings towards cats I suppose. For me this book is all about the memory of it- reading it at Grandpa K's house at the holidays with my sisters and cousins. It was always on the shelf. A quick read through was all it took to go back😝
June 30, 2025
I picked this up back in the 70’s when in college. I’m a big cat lover and actually found this hilarious. Yes, it’s in your face and some might find it shocking, but honestly, I laughed my ___ off. Paired with “Cat’s Revenge”, which is basically the cat’s reaction to the book makes the two a great pairing.
September 30, 2023
Alternative Title: Very Vary dark way of coping with the deaths of your pet.
I have mixed feeling about this. As a cat lover, I'm offended, but it was kinda funny too. Also, I leant something new today: Cats become very stiff after death.
I have mixed feeling about this. As a cat lover, I'm offended, but it was kinda funny too. Also, I leant something new today: Cats become very stiff after death.
January 16, 2025
I've just been reminded of this book which my grandmother had at her house and I read as a teen (I think? No idea when I actually read it) when visiting. Some of those illustrations are so wrong! I do recall getting one of those "eww" laughs out of it, though... So horrified it was funny?
December 28, 2018
Celý je to fakt moc divný.
April 11, 2019
Hilarious - I am a cat lover who loves to laugh. This book works for me. I bought the book when it first was published.
July 17, 2020
A bit of nostalgia from my youth. My mom took this book away from me when she found it, thus cementing my love for its sick and dark humor. I knew I would have it again someday.
August 13, 2021
A Hundred and One Uses of a Dead Cat – Simon Bond
Ridiculous, for example, a dead cat used as a church pulpit stand or an offering box. **
Ridiculous, for example, a dead cat used as a church pulpit stand or an offering box. **
March 2, 2022
Pari kertaa saatoin hymähtää.
April 6, 2023
A bit off putting, to me.
December 19, 2023
Recycling at it's best ;)
January 20, 2024
101 Uses for a Dead Cat by Simon Bond – My father bought this for my grandmother. Its nice when families have the same strange sense of humor. Happy Reading!
September 2, 2024
Beloved by my family of origin
Suitable only for those with a dark sense of humor
Suitable only for those with a dark sense of humor
September 13, 2024
Excellent wee book of cartoons depicting a hundred and one uses for a dead cat.
Very funny.
Very funny.
December 19, 2024
why are people so butthurt about this 😭 it’s hilarious
June 17, 2025
Hmm, just don't get it. What is supposed to be funny about abusing or using a dead cat, or any other dead body? Dead bodies aren't tools.
June 25, 2025
igual da malo, fome y violento que el otro
Displaying 1 - 30 of 53 reviews