The HardTalk Handbook

by Dawn Metcalfe

The HardTalk Handbook is an interactive guide to mastering the science and art of difficult conversations we keep avoiding. Using extensive research and neuroscience techniques, it explores the reasons behind communication behaviour and how to combat those that hold us back. It demonstrates how to resolve conflict and affect change, even in the most diverse organisations, no matter your culture, background or experience. Discover why we’d rather ‘put up’ instead of ‘turn up’ and how our natural instinct to ‘speak louder’ is far less important than ‘listening hard’. Whether you need to tell a colleague they smell, that your boss’s approach is ineffective or any other type of HardTalk you have experienced, this Handbook will show you the skills you need to succeed at the conversations that make all the difference.

171 pages, Paperback

Published March 28, 2018

About the author

Having worked in seven countries ranging from when she was a teenager in Ireland through to her time teaching teachers in China, to her now home in Dubai, she’s worked with leaders at all levels around the region and beyond to change the way they see the world, their behaviour and their impact on others.

As well as authoring The HardTalk Handbook and Managing the Matrix, she is also the founder of Dubai based PDSi, which helps individuals and teams get even better at what they do at their best. Known for not being afraid to tell truth to power her insights and straight-talking approach has kept her constantly in demand from large multinationals and government entities, across the Middle East, over the last 10 years.

Reviews

[Sarah Bahar · Rating 5 out of 5]

Disclaimer: I work with Dawn, the author of this, so I was lucky enough to be among the first who read it. This is not a business book designed to help only the upper echelons of management succeed. This is a book for everyone because its guiding principles and techniques are designed to help any one of us get better at handling those situations we've often avoided (or messed up in). Since I read it I've noticed a real difference in the way I approach situations and think about other people within them - whether that's at work or in a personal capacity.

[Saira Naeem · Rating 3 out of 5]

The HardTalk Handbook is the most useful book I’ve read since Thinking Fast and Slow.

[Sandy Metcalfe · Rating 5 out of 5]

DISCLAIMER: I am her Dad so I admit - objectivity may be in question!
Nevertheless having helped in the early stages of its development, proof reading etc, and not having been involved during the final stages of development, I returned to it yesterday, reading non-stop from cover to cover. Accepting fully all questions over my objectivity, I would nevertheless highlight a number of key points from my perspective. Firstly, having come to management training & coaching as a practitioner myself late in my career, and while I can take absolutely no credit for Dawn's knowledge & skills, I do believe I have sufficient experience in management & communications to fully appreciate - from a professional viewpoint (and not just from a personal family perspective) the value of the research and work involved for her in writing Hard Talk. Secondly, the multi-cultural and international experiential dimensions she brings to the book are beyond question. My wife and I have been proud to witness (in virtually all of the 7 countries she has lived) her ability to integrate into so many diverse communities first hand. Finally, the quantity and quality of testimonials included in the book are for me, an irrefutable tribute to Dawn, and her own ability of practising so much of what she in preaching in the book in relation to communication generally, and effective empathetic networking, in particular!
Unashamedly Proud Dad (& Mum).

[Annabelle Corton · Rating 5 out of 5]

I like being upfront in book reviews - so let me start by saying that I know the author, Dawn Metcalfe and I think she's swell. I don't however, often like books in the business section. But I did genuinely love this one - I think that's partly because HardTalk teaches you to handle difficult conversations, but not just specifically in the workplace, so it's not just a business book. It gives you the tools to apply HardTalk to any difficult conversation you might face and not in the form of wishy washy listicles either (my biggest frustration with a lot of business books - they're way too fluffy). It's packed with useful studies and statistics, and makes it quite clear that you won't be a HardTalk guru immediately after reading the book - you have to 'Work Hard' before your conversations deliver meaningful results. This is an interactive handbook so there are spaces to answer questions about your own HardTalk situations, and apply the learning from each chapter. Book reviews often say this is 'the book everyone needs to read', but I'm going to be cliche and say it here because in this case it really is true. I just wish I'd had a copy of this sooner.

[Fiona Du · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky enough to be one of the first people to read this book as part of the 'proofing' team. It transformed the way I had viewed training books and manuals. From the first page, it was clearly a cut above and quite simply a delight to read. Beyond that, it is packed full of information that absolutely no one can afford to ignore. If you work or have personal relationships, this is a book that can help you become a better communicator and result in more successful relationships with your colleagues, clients, suppliers and friends. It makes you think about things you never considered and transforms the way you see others and the unconscious biases that have been holding you back. I have been delighted to see the reception it has garnered and how people have embraced it as a crucial tool for them to grow their professional careers and businesses. This is not just a training handbook, this is a life-changing handbook. #HardTalkforever

[Mohamed Bhatti]

Without question this book has positively changed my outlook to how I deal not only with work, but also with personal and social situations.

The interesting thing is that when I first starting reading the handbook I thought it was about professional, corporate communication and situation management. How wrong! This book applies to life and the situations most of us face daily.

Many people would have considered me already as someone who is adapt to speaking him mind and managing tough situations, I even thought I was well versed and experienced, but I can honestly say I have learned plenty of positive communication changing tactics from the Hardtalk Handbook.

I wish I had a guide like this when I started my career, it would have set incredible foundations!

[Hugo Willis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Some books you read: others you use. This is a handbook so you might think it's simply the latter. In fact, it's a great read and a thoroughly useful toolkit to help deal with some of the key challenges of communications. As you might expect, it's rich on process and firmly aims at results but also delights with a well-balanced mix of anecdote, insight and some of the science behind the subject. If you have just one touchy subject in your life you are struggling to discuss with someone or you are an HR specialist or you are a leader who wants to fundamentally improve the culture of your organisation - get this book, read it and use it!

[Rachel Hamilton · Rating 5 out of 5]

A brilliantly practical book. I intended to flick through it but ended up reading from cover to cover and taking notes. Not only is The HardTalk Handbook useful in a business context but it also offers useful advice for other relationships in your life. I've been talking to my teenagers about a number of the tips inside, to help them navigate their way through life and control their emotions, and I've been sending snippets to friends in need of help when it comes to speaking up. It's one of those books you feel wiser for reading and deserves every one of the five stars I've given it. I highly recommend it.

[Marleena Kuusinen · Rating 5 out of 5]

The brilliant layout makes this handbook super easy to read, and the practical, relatable examples make the messaging easy to understand and remember. Definitely worth it!