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The Cat I Never Named : A True Story of Love, War, and Survival

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The stunning memoir of a Muslim teen struggling to survive the Bosnian genocide--and the stray cat who protected her family through it all.

Amra was a teen in Bihac, Bosnia, when her friend said they couldn’t speak anymore because Amra was Muslim. Then refugees from other cities started arriving, fleeing Serbian persecution. When Serbian tanks rolled into Bihac, the life she knew disappeared—right as a stray cat followed her home. Her family didn’t have the money to keep a pet, but after the cat seemed to save her brother, how could they turn it away? Saving a life one time could be a coincidence, but then it happened again—and Amra and her family wondered just what this cat was.

This is the story of a teen who, even in the brutality of war, never wavered in her determination to obtain education, maintain friendships, and even find a first love—and the cat that provided comfort, and maybe even served as a guardian spirit, in the darkest of times.

384 pages, Hardcover

Published September 8, 2020

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About the author

Amra Sabic-El-Rayess

3 books88 followers
Amra Sabic-El-Rayess is from Bihac, Bosnia and Herzegovina. She is an ethnic cleansing survivor. She emigrated to the United States in 1996. She earned a BA in Economics from Brown University and two Masters degrees and a Doctorate from Columbia University. Currently she is a professor at Columbia University’s Teachers College with research focus on how and why societies fall apart and what role education can play in rebuilding decimated countries. She has published numerous articles and research papers on education-related issues and has lectured around the world.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 500 reviews
123 reviews4 followers
October 18, 2020
This book is an incredible account of genocide that took place during the early 1990s in Bosnia.

Amra was 16 when the war started; while I was only 8 at the time, the events and experiences she documents closely parallel my own during the 1100+ day siege on our home town Bihać. Amra captures how quickly friends turned into enemies, allowing centuries long hatred and prejudice against the Muslim population to lead to the worst genocide on the European continent since WWII. On the first day of war, under heavy bombardment, I vividly remember asking my mom why the Serbs were bombing us. She said “it’s because you are Muslim.” Growing up in secular post-communist Yugoslavia, I didn’t even know what being a Muslim is, but here I was being killed for it.

Reading this book made me relive many of the events I witnessed first hand. Almost every day, someone I knew or our family knew would be killed. As Amra notes, a good day was when a family acquaintance died, and a bad day was when it was a close relative or a friend. I remember, after a while, you were just glad it wasn’t your nuclear family. To this day, following more than 3 years of no electricity or running water and being under constant bombardment and fear of sniper fire, the last day of war was the happiest day of my life.

In today’s context, Amra’s story serves as a cautionary tale on America’s own issues with racism and hate and how destructive this can be to a society. As my 6-year old daughter and I were laying these badges out for the picture, it was an opportunity to teach her about hate and about love, and how crucial is to never judge people by things they had no say in, whether it’s their place of birth, skin color, religion, sexual orientation, or any other reason.
Profile Image for Jessaka.
999 reviews217 followers
May 12, 2022
A war story

Bosnia 1992 to 1995. The genocide began in 1992. No reason other than racism and the fear of other religions. The Serbians hated the Muslims. Just as in America, many whites hate nonwhites. I was once told by a so-called Christian that I should ignore the racism in our Club. No one is perfect, and my need for perfection in people was not being loving. It was then thrown into my face some more. “As if you are perfect,” she stated. It is not about perfection; it is about love, loving your neighbor, causing no harm. It is about the very core of Christianity. Racism causes harm even though it is in words only. Words lead to violence. I never said those words to her, because I am not a quick thinker. I didn’t have them in my mind. I just quit the Club, but it took me a few times, always thinking that no one else would have a racist comment to say. Ending her friendship took a while, too, because she was persistent. I often felt stalked by her and her pleads.

I picked up this book thinking that it was a bout a cat. I didn’t read it for months because I thought that it would not be a great read. Not all animal stories are. I just didn’t read the entire title. That is a long story. Also, this book is classified as a teenage book. No, it isn’t. The author is a fantastic writer. The book is a page turner.

It is a story about a 16-year-old girl named Amra and her family. It is a story about war and survival. It is a story of courage, of hope, of despair, and of course it is a story about a cat, Amra’s cat that she never named but just called her “Cat.” This would be “Maci” in her own language. Pronounced “Moo-see.”

Maci followed her home one day, and at first her parents would not allow her to keep the cat, but Maci prevailed, and when it was believed that she had saved Amra’s brother, they allowed Maci to stay, for now Maci was special.

The Serbs and the Muslims lived peacefully together or so it seemed. Amra was a Muslim, and even had a Serbian friend, that is, until the day that her friend said that they could no longer hang out together. Then one day when Amra went to school, the Serbian children never showed up. A Muslim teacher came into the classroom and told the children to go home, that the Serbs have left, and the military is on its way.

How anyone can survive in all this fear,the bombing, snipers, and little food, is beyond me. Of course, many did not survive. At first, Amra and her family moved into a neighbor’s cellar, leaving Maci at home to survive on her own. Still Amra’s dad would chance going home to feed her, and then they all chanced going home and stayed, even after some missals tore apar their house.

Maci plays a major part in this story, and I came to love her and the family, and I worried about them all. Then at the end of the book, I cried, and I realize that this book will stay with me for a long time.
Profile Image for nitya.
462 reviews333 followers
March 16, 2022
Read for MLIS elective

RTC when I stop sobbing

And I don't know why this is under the graphic novel shelf. For the record, this is a prose memoir! The only picture is of Amra and Maci (the cat), which also is a section/time divider.

(And this is my 800th book on GR??!!!)

Content warning: Islamophobia, war, violence, death (it's a theme), genocide, rape (not to the narrator/author but it is mentioned), animal death, sexual harassment, humans being terrible and cruel*

*Probably my inner nihilist talking but I will include it
Profile Image for sarah.
215 reviews88 followers
July 10, 2021
More people need to read this book. I feel like there is still such a lack of awareness out here when it comes to the Bosnian War (part of the Yugoslav Wars, took place between 1992-1995).

Amra is an amazing storyteller.
Profile Image for akacya ❦.
1,734 reviews318 followers
Read
August 3, 2024
2024 reads: 222/250

this memoir follows the author, amra sabic-el-rayess, in her teen years as she lives through the bosnian genocide. her city, bihać, used to be a peaceful place where serbs, croats, and muslims could coexist, but when serbian tanks start rolling in, this peace is disrupted. in the middle of this, a cat saves her family and becomes somewhat of a guardian spirit in their lives.

after finishing this book, i was shocked to see that not many people have pointed out amra’s way of “othering” religious muslims. i’d like to make it clear i’m not judging her for pointing out that there are differences. as she said, when communism took over bosnia, people lost religious practices. however, the way she made a point to use these differences seemingly as the reason why bosniaks should be spared from genocide rubbed me the wrong way. instead of simply explaining the difference between bosnian muslims and religious muslims, it seemed to me like she judged religious muslims and even said that the serbs attacked bosniaks because they thought they were “all one kind of backward muslims.”

i did appreciate getting to learn more about the bosnian genocide. i really didn’t know much about it before starting this. while this memoir was more about how the genocide personally affected the author and not a history lesson, i’m glad to have gained more insight into this piece of history.
Profile Image for Jess Witkins.
556 reviews110 followers
September 4, 2020
This book will sit with me for awhile. I read it as covid-19 continues to spread across the U.S. It offered so much perspective. Our nation is being asked to stay in, limit our socialization, and wear a mask to stop the spread of the virus. These are transitions we must make, but they are little in comparison to what Amra had to face in a war torn country. Yet, the author's letter at the end says she wrote it during the start of covid-19, and she felt sorry for all of us as she understood how hard these transitions can be, hiding out in a neighbor's basement for days and having her school life disrupted and stopped suddenly.

Amra's story is well-crafted and gives us a firsthand account of life in a bombed out city. Her book teaches empathy. Her interactions with people as she grows up and survives so much detail the mix of characters and emotions we face in difficult times. As we are seeing in the U.S. now with Black Lives Matter protests, opinions of all kinds are popping up, there are opportunists who loot or damage property, but there are also activists fighting for an end to police brutality and community helpers who are cleaning up and providing food/shelter/donations. We are in this strange parallel. We are not facing missiles and bombs as Amra and her family were, but we're in the middle of deciding who we will be as a country in the future. It's clear she hopes that by sharing her story people will learn about and CARE about social justice issues like genocide, racism, religious persecution, and violence against women.

This book is a great read for young people. I think it would help many who have faced the loss of something due to covid or otherwise. And it's an intentional and true story that would crossover well for adults too.
Profile Image for Kate Mester.
944 reviews15 followers
February 16, 2021
Beautifully written and moving. Framing the story around her cat Maci (Bosnian for cat) that was her emotional guide throughout the war while she was a teenager will really resonate with the teen audience. She doesn't shy away from the true horrors and brutality trying to survive during a war/genocide and I appreciate that she was so vulnerable and honest to share her personal experiences. Front and back matter give context to the Bosnian war and her writing process. A unique perspective on a conflict and human experience that I learned more about and know readers will as well.
Profile Image for Ms. B.
3,749 reviews71 followers
May 19, 2024
What happens after Three Summers? What would it be like to grow up in a war zone? Even though this was written first, this is the story that continues author Amra's story of her teen years and finding hope in the midst of the Bosian War in the early 1990s.
Profile Image for Ebba Simone.
52 reviews
July 5, 2024
"I don't like leaving my friends. It feels so normal, being in a little room behind a desk, with the regular cycle of classes, chatting with friends in between. Normalcy has become my highest aspiration."

"I can feel the grief pouring off her like heat from a fire."

"The UN compound is surrounded by spiky rolls of barbed wire, telling us in no uncertain terms the difference between Us And Them."

"We find each other, Mama, Tata, and me. We cling to each other like drowning people. Over and over I ask Mama if we're alive. I honestly don't know. I can't tell if the warmth on my cheeks is from her tears or my blood."

"I found a little light this day, and once again it is extinguished. No, I tell myself as I head home. I won't let the world go black around me. I'll kindle a new light. With study and knowledge and persistance... and hope."
Profile Image for Ed.
Author 67 books2,716 followers
May 8, 2023
Sturdy memoir of a teenage girl living in Bosnian Muslim during the troubles there. Billed as a YA book, but I liked it just fine. The cat makes it an even better read. The fellow cat serfs will enjoy it. She helped to explain what happened during the war and gave me a better understanding of it. Displaying courage, kindness, and endurance, she makes for an appealing and sympathetic character.
Profile Image for Kara Gemian.
1,082 reviews42 followers
April 22, 2021
This. Book. Is. So. Important.

Everyone should read this and teens should study it in school. I don't read any nonfiction and I am so glad I picked this up.

Amra is 16 when the Serbs invade her hometown of Bihac, Bosnia in 1992 and her life changes forever. Her and her family's story of survival is so heartbreaking and yet so inspiring. Maci becomes a good luck charm for the Sabic family and a token of hope for the whole town throughout the war.

I was just a baby when the Bosnian genocide occurred and I either was not taught about it or was not taught it well in school because I had no idea this happened and that it happened so recently. As someone whose ancestors survived the Armenian genocide, a horrific moment in time that many still believe did not happen and do not acknowledge to this day, I was appalled that I had not heard of what happened in Bosnia from 1991-1995. I blame the public school system for picking and choosing what events in history are deemed essential to learn. Cultural hate has been around forever and it needs to stop. We must adapt communal empathy for those around us in order for all biases to be overcome.

Read this book, you won't regret it.
Profile Image for Claudia.
2,647 reviews109 followers
October 29, 2022
“Maybe bad people never believe they are bad,' I venture. 'While good people are always questioning their goodness. Maybe that's what keeps them good—the constant questioning.”

What happens when friends and neighbors become enemies?

A memoir...Bosnia, 1990's...Amra is a terrific student, on her way to college, when her best friend, a Serb, pulls away, and suddenly disappears, along with all other Servs in their town. Serbs got notice that Bihac, their home town, and all of Bosnia, will be the target of bombing and snipers and war. Why? Because those left are Muslims.

Sabic-El-Rayess is careful to control her younger self's knowledge of politics, so she knows very little. Her father used to be a respected professional, her mom a teacher. But schools close...government jobs dry up. And children die.

Into this world of uncertainty saunters a calico cat who seems to distract Amra's brother just long enough to avoid being killed by a bomb. Amra's parents want nothing to do with a cat, a maci, but Maci worms her way into the house, into Amra's room, onto Amra's bed...as cats do.

It really does seem like Maci the Calico is a guardian angel, and even when she's sent away, she returns.

This story is timely right now, as Ukraine is facing an invasion...eastern Europe struggles with boundaries, with ethnicities, with histories, with family relationships...and one tiny family just trying to survive until tomorrow...

In the Epilogue, Sabic-El-Rayess tells us her two daughters, US citizens, since the family now lives here, asks her if the aftermath of 9/11 will lead to their family being targeted like her Bosnian family was. Another timely reminder...we keep falling into the same hate traps...what will it take?
Profile Image for Carol.
419 reviews34 followers
July 3, 2025
I tried to read this book in one day because I didn't want to put it down. However, I eventually had to set it aside to tend to my responsibilities. A dear friend of mine recommended this book to me, and I have learned so much from it. I cried, I smiled, and I felt completely immersed in the story. Now, I understand a little bit better.

This book is heart-wrenching; it addresses the depths of inhumanity that people can exhibit in completely annihilating others because of their beliefs or religion, whether they actively practice that faith or not. The hatred and the lengths people will go to satisfy that hatred remain the same, regardless of the context. Genocide has occurred in several different countries, but the essence of it is always similar.

I was particularly moved by the part of the story of immigrants coming to America, trying to escape war and pursue a better life afterward. I admire their courage and determination to seek a brighter future. It is not easy to just get a passport and go to the right office to seek refuge. What is the "right way" for someone who is starving, someone who has lost everything, including their loved ones, homes, and possessions, and who has faced unimaginable horrors? When the officials responsible for determining the "right way" in their own country are corrupt, it complicates everything.

I condemn this way of thinking and always will. An immigrant—someone trying to build a better life for themselves—will never be our enemy. The real enemies are hatred, bigotry, racism, Islamophobia, anti-Semitism, and homophobia; these are the true threats we face, and they exist alongside us in this country.

I was genuinely touched by this story, and I want to thank my dear friend once again for recommending it to me. I also express my gratitude to the author for sharing her story with us.
Profile Image for Barbara.
14.6k reviews310 followers
February 16, 2021
I'm typing this review with tears in my eyes and a heart full of love for Maci, the amazing stray cat that brought joy into the life of the author and her family during almost three years of turmoil in Bihac, Bosnia. I am also grateful to the author for returning to this painful time and sharing her experiences through the pages of this book, a YALSA Nonfiction finalist. Amra spent the last part of her teen years in hiding with her family as the Serbs laid siege to her city, trying to starve out its Muslim residents while also constantly bombing the area. Hers is a story of resilience, determination, familial love, and hope. It's clear that education means a great deal to her, and she desperately misses her classes when the local schools must shut down due to the violence. And while she offers readers insight into the reasons behind the persecution, prejudice, and war and serves up details about daily life and the constant fear of death and rape, she also provides moments of lightness and humor. Many of those concern Maci, a gentle cat who saves the family's life more than once and helps Amra deal with her own depression and hopelessness. Maci simply always seems to be at the right place at the right time, and the family comes to cherish her. Her loyalty to them and to Amra is demonstrated by the many times she somehow makes her way back home when she has been moved somewhere else. As it turns out, Maci is far more loyal than Davor, Amra's first love, but the inclusion of this romance during the time of war adds a poignancy to the story while showing how much like a typical teenager this young girl was, despite what she's enduring. While I wonder at the dark places this story must have taken its author, I feel so honored that she has chosen to share it with the world. Maybe, just maybe, it will help others be less quick to judge those whose culture or religious beliefs are different from their own or help combat xenophobia. Maybe it will help each of us be more human and more aware of the political events and decisions in our own country as well as the genocides still occurring in the world.
Profile Image for John Valdez.
48 reviews1 follower
April 11, 2022
I am not sure I wanted to read this book right now given the situation in Ukraine and the simmering tensions in Bosnia but I am glad I did. The book is well written, compelling, and thought provoking. Amra is a 16 year old Bosniak girl whose only concern is making sure her first slumber party goes well. Soon after, the Bosnian War arrives in her city of Bihac when she notices the first refugees arrive and with them a small cat that latches herself onto Amra, who actually fears “anything with claws”. The cat, however, is determined to become part of her life and Amra soon falls in love along with her family. They call the cat Maci, which is the Bosnian word for cat. While Maci is an important character, the book focuses on Amra’s relationship with her family as they try to survive the siege of their city. You will journey with Amra as she tries to carve out some normalcy in her life by attending school when she can, spending time with friends, and falling in love. She assists her parents as they try to make ends meet while her father struggles with health. All the while Maci is an endearing presence throughout even saving Amra and her brother Dino from potential death.

The book is Dr. Sabic-El-Rayess memoir and it deals with several themes. One that stands out to me is Amra’s questioning about why this is happening when there is little difference between her friends who represent all ethnicities until the war begins and she loses her best friend who happens to be a Bosnian Serb. Amra’s father is a kind and gentle man, something that becomes a liability during the war. And Maci represents the undying love and devotion she shows to Amra and her whole family throughout the war. I encourage you to read the Acknowledgements section, and the final two sections that describe the situation in Bosnia Herzegovina today and a brief section describing her writing the book.

When I was more than half-way done with the book, I learned it falls within the young adult genre but it really didn’t matter to me as the book is excellent.
Profile Image for Shoshanna.
1,276 reviews2 followers
September 22, 2021
Absolutely beautiful and Absolutely devastating. I grew up reading stories from the holocaust but never about the wars in the former Yugoslavia. I feel like I learned a lot.

What stuck me most about this memoir is the extent to which people will do what they can to have some semblance of normal life even in war. While there is a lot if terrifying descriptions of violence, there are so many scenes at school, visiting friends, seeing family, planting gardens, swimming, falling in love, playing with your family kittie.

Definitely recommended especially if you knew as little as I did about details of the war, though it was going on while I was growing up. Be ready for descriptions of wartime violence, and sexual violence (this part is not as detailed, but still it's quite shocking). This book is marketed to teens but I imagine many teens may not be ready to read these descriptions. Definitely recommended for adults!
Profile Image for Amra Pajalic.
Author 28 books80 followers
December 5, 2020
This is an incredible memoir about Amra's experiences living under siege in Bihac during the Balkan War of 1992-1995. It was an amazing insight into the hardship and heartbreak of war. Maci, the cat that Amra and her family adopted was such a beautiful soul and helped give Amra hope and fight for life, when it seemed that none was to be found. The writing was beautiful and evocative. I keep seeing Maci in my mind's eye.

I also have to say that the cover was absolutely stunning and I loved the use of the image in the novel to bookmark different time frames.

Amra wrote this book as a resource for young people to learn about the perils of hatred and discrimination and there are resources provided to support educators in that aim, or for readers to learn more about the war.

I also have to say it's a thrill to have read a book by another Amra.
Profile Image for Emily Byrne.
139 reviews1 follower
February 26, 2023
Beautiful. Amra's story telling is magnificent and makes me love my cat even more! ...Though I'm not sure she would save me from a war...
Profile Image for Amy.
13 reviews
February 11, 2024
Maybe the best memoir I’ve ever read.
Profile Image for Samantha Matherne.
835 reviews64 followers
May 1, 2024
Normally, I do not read books that will likely make me sad, but this memoir is a good account of one teen's experience during the Bosnian War in the early 1990s. Schools in the US taught me that the end of the Cold War and the fall of the Soviet Union were only positive for Eastern Europeans, but books like this show the negative side to the history that America does not necessarily want us to know. The world promised that nothing like the Holocaust would happen again, and it did within the same century.

Amra Sabic-El-Rayess's story gave me hope and nearly made me cry multiple times. She escaped some of the harsher realities of the war that some Bosniaks suffered, but she still struggled to survive and make a life for herself in the world thanks to the war. Maci (the cat) is a larger than life character in the memoir, and the author's note emphasizes that she was a huge impact on her family and life. My heart broke for the author when she described the sad pieces from her life during and after the war, but learning of her successes today is inspiring.
Profile Image for Saralz .
74 reviews1 follower
July 29, 2022
This was one of the most powerful books I have ever read. The writing was so simple and easy to read yet every single world was powerful. I found myself at the verge of tears while reading this, knowing that this genocide did happen and more continue today. I’m so glad I picked up this book, it opened my eyes to so many things. Bravo!
Profile Image for kelios.
85 reviews1 follower
March 22, 2021
I am sorry for what happened to the Bosnians. But i’ll comment as book reader. There are parts that kinda baffled me.
Amra mentioned that she’s proud of her muslim identity thus the time when her parents told her to move out to follow a Serb family, and change her name to Serb’s name, she didn’t want that. But often times she emphasized that the Bosnian muslims are just Muslim by names only. Also sometimes she was like questioning why did Serbs attacking Bosnians muslim when they don’t even practice Islam. Bosnians muslims don’t pray and recite quran, they eat hams and prosciutto, drink alcohol, go to the beach topless, same just like the Serbs people. Maybe i got it wrong but it sounds to me like it is OK to attack true muslims (muslims who prays, no pork, no alcohol consume) instead ??

There are these excerpts too;
“We’re Muslims, yes, but we have always been free to personally decide the extent of our religiosity. We define ourselves as Bosnians first, Muslim second.
But the Serbs don���t. To them, we are Muslims first, last, always. —— Our identity as Muslims was always flexible. The Serbs think we are all one kind of BACKWARD MUSLIM”

Did this author just call Muslims, “backward” ????!

Also, as a cat lover i purchased this book solely for the cat illustration on the book cover. But then to find out Amra’s family threw away the poor cat near the ending!? This book is pretty much cancelled.
Profile Image for kate..
634 reviews55 followers
November 29, 2021
breaking stereotypes and awakening to hard truths about things happening in today's world. books are my resource, and i'm so grateful for amazing, strong, and talented authors like this one for sharing their story 🙌. i applaud you!

amra is a herione. a brilliant student, tall, beautiful, and muslim. she is resilient and so, so brave. living in bosnia, (a country i have barely even heard of, tbh) she lives through war, hate, threats, and so much more. why? because she was born muslim. oh stereotypes and hatred. they do so much damage to innocent and beautiful souls!!

i loved this book. it was not an easy read, but it opened my eyes and i enjoyed the story as well. so inspiring 💛

this story is a memoir. written by a gifted writer. she doesn't shy away from the horrors of war, though, so be prepared. but know there is light as well as dark! romance, happy family, school, etc :)
cw/tw: death, bombs, starvation, mentions/closely attempted rape, war camps, ...

>> read as an ebook. 3.5 stars but i feel like ebooks are always a little worse than actual books so...
Profile Image for Brandan Radford.
92 reviews
January 11, 2023
This books has definitely set the bar high for books I am going to read in 2023! Amra Sabic-El-Rayess crafted a powerful retelling of the truth she lived as a teen during the Bosnian war. This book has been on my to read list since it came out and I started following her when i was working at Columbia—her LinkedIn posts were always little reminders to read it! Well I finally did and this book was beyond my wildest expectations. The epilogue turned me into a little puddle of tears. With the finishing of this book the importance of her work seems now more paramount with the Ukrainian conflict having its own parallels to the conflict she survived.
Profile Image for Sue Em.
1,718 reviews115 followers
May 13, 2020
A wrenching, yet life affirming true story of a bright Muslim girl whose world is decimated by the horrors of the Bosnian conflict yet finds ways to get an education and live helped her family and friends and a small cat named Maci. Her resilence is extraordinary. Don't miss the afterward where she discusses and compares the disruptions of her youth to what is happening now with the pandemic. Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read the book in exchange for an honest review.
Profile Image for Sarah Book Dragon.
425 reviews239 followers
June 13, 2023
That was a beautiful story, and I laughed and cried (a lot- like for hours on end) and smiled through it all. While this book may be about the struggles of war, I think its better described as small acts of joy and kindness keeping weary people from giving up hope. Maci really embodies that hope
honestly there are no words I say can say to do it any fraction of the justice it deserved
a criminally underrated book if there ever was one.
Profile Image for Corinne.
364 reviews21 followers
May 28, 2021
Fucking incredible. I cannot really formulate words.
Profile Image for Jaz ♡.
336 reviews18 followers
December 10, 2024
As much as people like to tout learning about history so that we can avoid dooming ourselves to making the same mistakes again, the sad truth is that human nature never really changes. That’s what I got from this book. Because the Bosnian genocide that happened in the 1990s is not the first, nor will it be the last, horrific act of violence enacted against a group of people that is hated for simply being who they are. It’s happening in Palestine right now. And just like with the Bosnian genocide, world-leading and international powers are doing little to intervene with peacemaking.

As hopeless as that thought makes me feel, I still think it is so important to read impactful stories like this, because I do still believe that relating to people often considered “other” is one of the most powerful tools we have for building empathy. This memoir is classified as young adult, and Amra writes using very simple prose to chronicle her personal experiences living and surviving through the Bosnian War from 1992-1995.

Despite the simplistic writing style, Amra conveys a full spectrum of complex emotions and issues that left me crying at points. War is full of misery and hopelessness, fearing for your life as you are surrounded by violence and killing. Outside Amra’s city, the Serbs are attacking and bombing her. Inside the city, all the scummy opportunists are looking to take advantage of the vacuum of power and lack of bureaucracy.

There is nothing mediocre in a war, nothing banal. It is all extremes. Either we are starving or every small bite of food is as delicious as a king’s banquet … Our days are endlessly boring … until they are much more exciting than we want them to be.


Even so, Amra manages to find moments of refuge and community in such normal activities as studying for school, visiting her crush, cleaning plots of land with her neighbors. Above all, the love she shares with her family, and of course, her cat Maci (which is just Bosnian for “cat”), provides the brightest source of light in these dark times.

I realize that this city is my destiny … If I leave, I will die. If I stay, I will die. At least if I stay, I’ll have love while I live.


Amra is a survivor, but one thing this book makes clear is that it’s important to remember all the people who have already had their lives stolen in the war. For them, “no cease-fire will ever matter.”

When violence against certain groups becomes normalized, stories like mine happen. It became normal for Serb soldiers to try to kill me every day. Doesn’t that sound horrific?
Profile Image for Anna.
31 reviews
September 28, 2024
I learned so much reading this book about a horrific war I didn’t even know happened. I also learned a lot about Bosnia and Herzegovina which should be a must - at least as a European. I learned a lot about the UN. And I developed a bigger appreciation for my cat (funnily enough called Dino) even though he absolutely isn’t as intelligent as Maci.

I was lucky enough to “meet” Amra Sabic-El-Rayess - it was just in a zoom meeting due to Covid - and hear her talk about her book, her life and her cat which is why I heard about the book in the first place but you would never see the horrific things she survived in her eyes. What a strong woman!
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