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How to Build Meaningful Relationships through Conversations
We have conversations every day, but how many of those can be considered effective? The right conversation can help establish strong relationships, solve problems, create new opportunities, and build communities. The right conversation can change everything.
But how does one prepare to have a conversation in an effective way?
In 10 lectures for self-development, professional communications coach and speaker Carol Ann Lloyd teaches the best ways to communicate and listen, including how to focus on understanding, how to overcome barriers and distractions, and how to clarify intentions. When listeners step back to hear what makes conversations successful, they will learn that each component of a conversation is a piece of a larger puzzle, which only fits together when thoughtfully considered and executed.
Conversations that matter take effort, and every conversation can be R.E.A.L. (Relevant, Effective, Affirming, Legitimate.) Carol Ann Lloyd also shares the three pitfalls in tough conversations and shows how to avoid them. By the end of this course, listeners will have a new understanding of the way people communicate. What’s more, they’ll develop the confidence to live the life they want to live—one conversation at a time.
But how does one prepare to have a conversation in an effective way?
In 10 lectures for self-development, professional communications coach and speaker Carol Ann Lloyd teaches the best ways to communicate and listen, including how to focus on understanding, how to overcome barriers and distractions, and how to clarify intentions. When listeners step back to hear what makes conversations successful, they will learn that each component of a conversation is a piece of a larger puzzle, which only fits together when thoughtfully considered and executed.
Conversations that matter take effort, and every conversation can be R.E.A.L. (Relevant, Effective, Affirming, Legitimate.) Carol Ann Lloyd also shares the three pitfalls in tough conversations and shows how to avoid them. By the end of this course, listeners will have a new understanding of the way people communicate. What’s more, they’ll develop the confidence to live the life they want to live—one conversation at a time.
5 pages, Audible Audio
First published February 18, 2020
85 people are currently reading
716 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 166 reviews
January 10, 2021
Yet another book about conversations. What makes a meaningful relationship (personal, romantic, work-related, etc.) is having conversations that matter. I find this a vital topic, and I enjoy reading about it.
This book was great and very practical. I put it after my other two favourite books about conversations - "Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High" and "How to Win Friends and Influence People". If you are interested in the topic, I highly recommend them.
I listened to the audiobook, which is read by the author. Carol Ann's voice is lovely and it is curious that she is bringing Shakespeare on the book's stage from time to time. For example, she says there are no pauses in Shakespeare tragedies which leads to disasters. So, it's essential to think before you talk and it's good to avoid talking when you are upset. Also, Shakespeare's work is still relevant today (after more than 400 years) because of its timeless conversations and well-built characters. Language is a very powerful tool, and we need to use it wisely.
Conversations are important because they can start a healthy relationship or solve problems between people. They also create opportunities and build communities.
You can find many case studies in the book, which is a great way to observe people's behaviour and then listen the analysis about it.
I had so many notes but will try to confine to those I find the most important.
Don't get distracted from the goal of the conversation and don't react to provocations. Some people might think they are doing the only correct thing possible without realising that there are many ways to accomplish something. Your purpose is not to pull them out of their imaginary world. Identify the destination of the conversation - you need to know at all time what your goal is. Focus on that.
This means that the conversation should matter for all participants and it should accomplish something important. One thing I've noticed is that some people don't respect other people's choices. You don't need to agree with the other person but try and understand them. Sometimes you need to make compromises or find an alternative win-win decision.
Both are correct, depending on the conversation. Sometimes it's just not worth arguing with someone. You can quickly understand if they are the type of person that you can have a meaningful conversation with.
What I usually think when I meet new people is not that they are strangers but future friends. The worst thing that can happen if you find out you don't click with them is that you will be acquaintances. I don't see it as a risk to have the best intentions for someone. It's an investment in friendship after all.
The best way to manage your emotions is to identify them first. For example, defensiveness is a common emotion in arguments. It's also not a good idea to deny the other person's emotions. You better say "Slow down" instead of "Stay calm", or "You don't need to be upset about that."
I have an observation that empathetic people are very good communicators. It's essential to see the difference between understanding and agreement - they are simply not the same thing. You can understand someone's point of view without agreeing with it as I said above. Then the next step is to seek first to understand than to be understood. Get yourself in learning mode (not defensiveness). A good example is "the father and son argument" in which the son doesn't want to eat broccoli. The dad wants a strong son and the son wants to be able to make an independent choice. If you think about it, there are no contradictions in their goals. The son can try to choose other green veggies (and this is also the IKEA effect).
Questions are a mighty tool. Sometimes people avoid them and go directly to accusations and assumptions. It is crucial not to make assumptions when you don't know a detail - it's so much better to ask. With questions, you can make a discovery and then you don't need to assume the wrong things. The problem with assumptions is that they are usually negative, and they are often far from the truth. It's a different case if the assumption is positive, then you work on a positive outcome. This way, you are fostering growth and professional development.
Not everything said is a challenge, depending on the speaker of course. Sometimes it's better not to tell what you think if it will not help the situation. Be understanding and empathetic. People might have something happening in their life that you don't know.
This is not very pleasant. You can listen, ask questions and then share your story. Conversations are not a competition who has the best story.
It's good to pay attention to how much you talk - often it's much more than you think. Be open and receptive and allow others to share opinions and ideas. If you want a good conversation where people feel safe to share their opinion, give them room to think and speak. Be committed in understanding them, and then you can share your ideas, wisdom and suggestions. Effective conversations are balanced on the listener and speaker's role.
You can always choose how to respond. Remember that you control only what you say. Even if what the other person is saying is frustrating, this is beyond your control.
Look for the best in people and focus on that. There are bad things about everyone. Some things are not worth mentioning. For example, if you think your colleague looks fat in their new haircut - what is the point of saying this? It's unkind. It's another thing if they ask you for your opinion. If you look for the good in people and you will find it.
We all have been wrong about something at some point. It's not a big deal to admit it. The sensible people will understand you and not judge you. And as for the non-sensible people, you shouldn't really care. It's important not to repeat mistakes but not as important as to handle the situation gracefully and learn from them. The most costly mistakes are the ones we don't learn anything from.
That was my first book of the Great Courses, and I enjoyed it a lot.
My main takeaway is that to be an effective communicator, you need to be respectful, kind, composed and to seek an understanding in the other party's needs and interest. A powerful thing to say is something that will help in the conversation. Also remember that people are less defensive when they think a bit before they talk.
Kindness will bring you more kindness - it multiplies - the more you give, the more you get. Make a conscious effort not to hurt people with your words. Try to learn from others even if you don't agree with them. If you want a positive outcome then you need to think positively about the other person.
This book was great and very practical. I put it after my other two favourite books about conversations - "Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High" and "How to Win Friends and Influence People". If you are interested in the topic, I highly recommend them.
I listened to the audiobook, which is read by the author. Carol Ann's voice is lovely and it is curious that she is bringing Shakespeare on the book's stage from time to time. For example, she says there are no pauses in Shakespeare tragedies which leads to disasters. So, it's essential to think before you talk and it's good to avoid talking when you are upset. Also, Shakespeare's work is still relevant today (after more than 400 years) because of its timeless conversations and well-built characters. Language is a very powerful tool, and we need to use it wisely.
Conversations are important because they can start a healthy relationship or solve problems between people. They also create opportunities and build communities.
You can find many case studies in the book, which is a great way to observe people's behaviour and then listen the analysis about it.
I had so many notes but will try to confine to those I find the most important.
"Stick to the goal."
Don't get distracted from the goal of the conversation and don't react to provocations. Some people might think they are doing the only correct thing possible without realising that there are many ways to accomplish something. Your purpose is not to pull them out of their imaginary world. Identify the destination of the conversation - you need to know at all time what your goal is. Focus on that.
"A conversation should be REAL - Relevant Effective Affirming and Legitimate."
This means that the conversation should matter for all participants and it should accomplish something important. One thing I've noticed is that some people don't respect other people's choices. You don't need to agree with the other person but try and understand them. Sometimes you need to make compromises or find an alternative win-win decision.
"Missed conversations are lost opportunities." and "Decide which conversations to have".
Both are correct, depending on the conversation. Sometimes it's just not worth arguing with someone. You can quickly understand if they are the type of person that you can have a meaningful conversation with.
"Every conversation has the potential to be a game-changer."
What I usually think when I meet new people is not that they are strangers but future friends. The worst thing that can happen if you find out you don't click with them is that you will be acquaintances. I don't see it as a risk to have the best intentions for someone. It's an investment in friendship after all.
"Manage emotions, especially your own."
The best way to manage your emotions is to identify them first. For example, defensiveness is a common emotion in arguments. It's also not a good idea to deny the other person's emotions. You better say "Slow down" instead of "Stay calm", or "You don't need to be upset about that."
"Focus on increasing understanding."
I have an observation that empathetic people are very good communicators. It's essential to see the difference between understanding and agreement - they are simply not the same thing. You can understand someone's point of view without agreeing with it as I said above. Then the next step is to seek first to understand than to be understood. Get yourself in learning mode (not defensiveness). A good example is "the father and son argument" in which the son doesn't want to eat broccoli. The dad wants a strong son and the son wants to be able to make an independent choice. If you think about it, there are no contradictions in their goals. The son can try to choose other green veggies (and this is also the IKEA effect).
"Ask questions."
Questions are a mighty tool. Sometimes people avoid them and go directly to accusations and assumptions. It is crucial not to make assumptions when you don't know a detail - it's so much better to ask. With questions, you can make a discovery and then you don't need to assume the wrong things. The problem with assumptions is that they are usually negative, and they are often far from the truth. It's a different case if the assumption is positive, then you work on a positive outcome. This way, you are fostering growth and professional development.
"You don't need to respond to everything that is said."
Not everything said is a challenge, depending on the speaker of course. Sometimes it's better not to tell what you think if it will not help the situation. Be understanding and empathetic. People might have something happening in their life that you don't know.
"Don't always top someone's words with your similar story."
This is not very pleasant. You can listen, ask questions and then share your story. Conversations are not a competition who has the best story.
"Do not talk about yourself all the time."
It's good to pay attention to how much you talk - often it's much more than you think. Be open and receptive and allow others to share opinions and ideas. If you want a good conversation where people feel safe to share their opinion, give them room to think and speak. Be committed in understanding them, and then you can share your ideas, wisdom and suggestions. Effective conversations are balanced on the listener and speaker's role.
"You shouldn't be talking when you are upset."
You can always choose how to respond. Remember that you control only what you say. Even if what the other person is saying is frustrating, this is beyond your control.
"Honesty without kindness is cruelty."
Look for the best in people and focus on that. There are bad things about everyone. Some things are not worth mentioning. For example, if you think your colleague looks fat in their new haircut - what is the point of saying this? It's unkind. It's another thing if they ask you for your opinion. If you look for the good in people and you will find it.
"Takes responsibilities for mistakes."
We all have been wrong about something at some point. It's not a big deal to admit it. The sensible people will understand you and not judge you. And as for the non-sensible people, you shouldn't really care. It's important not to repeat mistakes but not as important as to handle the situation gracefully and learn from them. The most costly mistakes are the ones we don't learn anything from.
That was my first book of the Great Courses, and I enjoyed it a lot.
My main takeaway is that to be an effective communicator, you need to be respectful, kind, composed and to seek an understanding in the other party's needs and interest. A powerful thing to say is something that will help in the conversation. Also remember that people are less defensive when they think a bit before they talk.
Kindness will bring you more kindness - it multiplies - the more you give, the more you get. Make a conscious effort not to hurt people with your words. Try to learn from others even if you don't agree with them. If you want a positive outcome then you need to think positively about the other person.
June 6, 2020
Don't listen to this unless you want Carol Ann Lloyd to ruin the ending of Downton Abbey for you! Not cool, Carol. Not cool.
On another note, as a tool for learning better communication, this is a good book. Some books bring earth-shattering revelations one after the other. Others are palatable, well written reminders to keep doing things you know you should do, but sometimes forget to do.
Also, I read a lot of books on communication, and if that wasn't the case and this was one of the first books on communication I'd read, maybe it would be new and earth-shattering? I don't know. But it's worth checking out. If you have finished Downton Abbey.
I'd rate this a PG.
On another note, as a tool for learning better communication, this is a good book. Some books bring earth-shattering revelations one after the other. Others are palatable, well written reminders to keep doing things you know you should do, but sometimes forget to do.
Also, I read a lot of books on communication, and if that wasn't the case and this was one of the first books on communication I'd read, maybe it would be new and earth-shattering? I don't know. But it's worth checking out. If you have finished Downton Abbey.
I'd rate this a PG.
April 21, 2020
“The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.” ― Mark Twain
Carol Ann Lloyd gives advice on communicating more effectively in your personal and professional life. Through case studies and Shakespearean references, Lloyd provides readers with the tools they need to build those relationships that matter most.
✅ Shakespearean references
✅ Self-help
✅ Good for road trips
Full Disclosure: I listened to this on Audible. Audiobooks are usually either hit or miss for me. I tend to absorb information better when I read a physical book. However, I love listening to a good audiobook while I’m driving or doing household chores. I’ve noticed that I tend to be more engaged with non-fiction when listening on audio.
Among several other things, the author discusses how everyone has different conversation styles and how it's important to be able to recognize this. Some people are aggressive, some are even-keeled, some vary their pitch and speed. But, then she talks about how you should change your style to work better with others, maybe “a competitive boss”. I found myself wondering if it would be possible to effectively communicate without acquiescing to others “conversation styles” and becoming a doormat to this said "competitive boss". The author gives tips that are too many and long-winded. I felt as though I was listening to steps within steps within steps. I need bullet point summarization. Just give me the good stuff.
There was a particular part of the audiobook where the author highlights the importance of small talk. She explains that small talk is important because it leads to bigger conversations. I agree with this; however, she provides an odd example to prove her point. She talked about how making small talk with a neighbor at a bus stop, would lead to that neighbor being comfortable coming to you about bigger things (like a presentation they are giving at work). Say what? Ain’t nobody got time for that. I don’t want my neighbor coming to me with their problems…I got family for that!
One piece of advice I really liked: How to respond to my child when they ask for something, “Right now the answer is no, but if you give me more time and information the answer might change.” I think this response will be extremely beneficial when I’m talking with my children. Parents always tend to respond, “Because I said so.” But, children don’t get that, they just think you’re being a fun sponge, or worse, that you don’t trust them.
Some other pro tips: 1) Get comfortable with silence. It’s okay to not talk all the time. 2) You cannot multi-task and listen. Stop what you’re doing and give that person your undivided attention.
Overall, I didn’t find anything incredibly groundbreaking in this audiobook. Many self-help books touch on the same things and they can be a bit repetitive. If you’ve read or listened to an audiobook recently on effective communication, you can probably just skip this one. If you are looking for a refresher course, this book will probably be helpful.
Signing Off- Don’t forget to support your local libraries and bookstores!
July 11, 2020
This wasn't life changing and nothing I hadn't heard before. But I will say that it provided some good reminders.
1. Don't have a conversation when you are fighting or mad.
2. Don't have a conversation when it won't help the matter.
3. Don't rent to your family or friends.
4. What do you want to be different after the conversation?
5. LISTEN!! Don't make it about you.
6. LOOK!! Look at the person who is speaking to you.
7. Use meaningful genuine gestures. Your delivery is how you call attention to what matters most.
8. Use your voice not your words. Your voice communicates your feelings. Think of your tone, the volume you speak, etc.
9. Consider your body language.
10. PUT YOUR PHONE DOWN!!
1. Don't have a conversation when you are fighting or mad.
2. Don't have a conversation when it won't help the matter.
3. Don't rent to your family or friends.
4. What do you want to be different after the conversation?
5. LISTEN!! Don't make it about you.
6. LOOK!! Look at the person who is speaking to you.
7. Use meaningful genuine gestures. Your delivery is how you call attention to what matters most.
8. Use your voice not your words. Your voice communicates your feelings. Think of your tone, the volume you speak, etc.
9. Consider your body language.
10. PUT YOUR PHONE DOWN!!
April 2, 2022
A masterpiece everyone should read bcs ppl cant FUCKING LISTEN!!! Seek to understand and than to be understood. Honesty is the best policy, but honesty without kindness is cruelty, always see the good in people. Different conversation styles can clash, maybe that’s why you find that one person who is loud and talks fast annoying when you are calm and think before you speak..? Take a moment to think and pause when you answer a question, especially when complicated. Sometimes conversations should be paused and carried on when the participants are not as emotional, in order to keep it productive and not hurtful.
April 7, 2020
This was definitely something different for me.
I don't usually dive into any sort of self-help book but How to Build Meaningful Relationships through Conversations intrigued me. Mostly because I just did my year end review with my boss and he kept saying that I was a very independent worker. So I took that to heart because I used to always be a team player beforehand.
That being said, I saw this book and figured this could definitely help me in and out of the work place.
The little levels we go through dive into how one can become a better listener, speaker, and overall better person. Never really thought of myself as being super selfish when it came to talking to someone but I can definitely tell when I start to zone out of a conversation. Not saying that the person I'm talking to is boring or not important.. no it's just that I am constantly doing something workwise.
It also dove into multitasking.. and how it's kind of nonexistent and no one is good at it. Well this made me laugh because I'm constantly juggling multiple things every day of the week. Especially for work.. but also when I dive into reading some books. So, I'm not fully on board with that statement since I tend to succeed in multitasking.
Other than that, it was something new and different for me.
I don't usually dive into any sort of self-help book but How to Build Meaningful Relationships through Conversations intrigued me. Mostly because I just did my year end review with my boss and he kept saying that I was a very independent worker. So I took that to heart because I used to always be a team player beforehand.
That being said, I saw this book and figured this could definitely help me in and out of the work place.
The little levels we go through dive into how one can become a better listener, speaker, and overall better person. Never really thought of myself as being super selfish when it came to talking to someone but I can definitely tell when I start to zone out of a conversation. Not saying that the person I'm talking to is boring or not important.. no it's just that I am constantly doing something workwise.
It also dove into multitasking.. and how it's kind of nonexistent and no one is good at it. Well this made me laugh because I'm constantly juggling multiple things every day of the week. Especially for work.. but also when I dive into reading some books. So, I'm not fully on board with that statement since I tend to succeed in multitasking.
Other than that, it was something new and different for me.
June 7, 2020
My goal this year has been to be a more interested listener. I used to be told I was really good at this but I know I could do better and try harder. Plus as a marriage enrichment enthusiast and in my professional life as a patient care coordinator I KNOW these are important lessons to always be working on.
I took a few pages of notes the first time throughout reading this and would enjoy rereading this book again soon. I don't remember anything fantastical but it's definitely helpful to keep these ideas at the forefront if you're trying to improve relationships by listening.
I took a few pages of notes the first time throughout reading this and would enjoy rereading this book again soon. I don't remember anything fantastical but it's definitely helpful to keep these ideas at the forefront if you're trying to improve relationships by listening.
May 28, 2020
I got this free from Audible and figured that it couldn't hurt to listen to it, but didn't expect to get too much from it. However, it was actually very useful and I feel that I've learned quite a bit. I'm excited to use some of these tips and strategies, primarily in my work relationships, but in my general relationships as well. I'm very happy that I decided to listen to this.
July 30, 2022
3.5 ⭐️
August 16, 2020
Good book. Interesting points discussed. Some of the lectures introduce common-sense tips which we are already aware of, but there is never any harm in a good reminder.
May 4, 2020
Don’t Be an Asshole: A How To
February 27, 2024
Common sense stuff. The constant references to Shakespeare just annoyed me.
May 24, 2020
It gave me a lot to think about to make conversations more productive in the future. Lots of warnings about when to engage in conversations, particularly cooling down when emotions are running high before conversing. Having a purpose for business conversations. Evaluating the pros/cons of continuing conversations based if it looks like the objectives will be achieved. Also, thoughts to consider; meetings are just orchestrated conversations, a relationship or opportunity can turn on a conversation, and conversations are the bedrock of relationships. Lots of case studies/examples. Well worth reading.
May 31, 2020
I got this book as one of my monthly audible originals. I thought it would add a different view to the topic because the title made it sound more personal. But it’s very basic and mainly focused on professional conversational skills. Only once in a while turning it to personal conversations.
I’m trying to imagine if this book would have helped me professionally before I learned about different communication and cognitive styles. My answer is “maybe” but not completely.
My point is this book might help beginners who have never before thought about effective professional talk. But to me it was like an incomplete refresher course. And unfortunately I expected something different from it.
I’m trying to imagine if this book would have helped me professionally before I learned about different communication and cognitive styles. My answer is “maybe” but not completely.
My point is this book might help beginners who have never before thought about effective professional talk. But to me it was like an incomplete refresher course. And unfortunately I expected something different from it.
August 28, 2021
This book was very interesting and I could see myself either going back to it or recommending it to others. It is a very effective and compact course on having useful conversations, and I think it's something everyone should be formally taught at least once.
That being said, as someone who has read other books on communication and studied it formally at university, this was not groundbreaking. There weren't any things I hadn't heard before, but it was a nice reminder.
I would recommend this to anybody who wants to become a better, more effective conversationalist.
That being said, as someone who has read other books on communication and studied it formally at university, this was not groundbreaking. There weren't any things I hadn't heard before, but it was a nice reminder.
I would recommend this to anybody who wants to become a better, more effective conversationalist.
May 23, 2021
This book offered excellent advice on handling real-life examples of difficult conversations. While the advice is basic, we often react in the heat of the moment (like a co-worker blaming you and then hanging up so you immediately call back to start yelling which just led to more angry feelings on both sides). The stories are good reminders to WAIT - Why Am I Talking. Ask yourself what do you hope to get out of the conversation before having it.
January 13, 2024
I finally got around to finishing this book (self help books rather bore me, so it takes me a long time to actually finish them). That being said, this was one of the better self help books I've read/listened to. All about how to communicate better. Nothing really ground breaking, but good reminders anyway.
December 12, 2020
A lot of the communication techniques she describes as being “musts” or highly encouraged are ableist and ignore the struggle of folx who want to communicate more efficiently but struggle due to social or developmental disabilities. Not really a book for anyone looking to work on developing skills but if you want to punish yourself with shame in your communication style, read on.
August 21, 2020
Not bad, not great. The information is fairly accurate overall although not new, some things are oversimplified, others are exaggerated and the approach varies from superficial to very focused.
February 20, 2022
I think it's fitting that this book about effective communication is exclusive to the audiobook format. Lloyd's narration felt like a conversation with an easy to talk to mentor and it was easy to follow along with. There were a lot of really good lessons that I've tried to incorporate in my conversations, and I've noticed that doing so has began to strengthen my personal relationships. The case studies and the plethora of examples offered aided my understanding of these concepts and employing them in my everyday life.
Read
January 21, 2025Was this something groundbreaking and new? Nope. Was it something I needed to be reminded of or things made aware of? Yep.
June 25, 2020
3.5 stars. I agree with what the author says about active listening and making sure to put away our phones when having a conversation with people, it’s just that nothing here was revolutionary.
May 30, 2024
I don’t think there’s much this book can offer that’s not presented in most self-help books. It boils down to: Listen more, talk less, don’t make it all about you, don’t hold your phone while others are talking, be mindful of other people’s emotions and beliefs, etc. There are many examples (or cases) to help, but it’s not anything you won’t have heard thousands of times. It’s nice. But nothing is new or novel here.
May 8, 2022
This was pretty decent! The goal is to build relationships through improving our communication skills. There are helpful tips and case studies that even those really good at communicating can benefit. Some important take aways for me were active listening skills; moving away from distractions and not multitasking. I love the acronym WAIT; Why Am I Talking? There are some specific areas of my work life where talking less will be beneficial. I enjoyed how she framed the use of silence and how we seldom experience true silence in our day.
May 9, 2021
1.5
I really wanted to bring myself to finish this audiobook, but I just couldn't. I was starting to fall asleep listening to it and just didn't want to waste anymore of my time. (I listened to 7 out of 10 chapters).
The facts presented here on how to be a better communicater and speaker are pretty obvious and things anyone who has studied speech/communication studies should know. Anyone not new to the topic; this audiobook is pretty much a recap and with some good reminders.
However, the reason I gave it such a low rating is because it doesn't really discuss up until where I listened, how to have important conversations with difficult people who are stubborn and unwilling to change; people where it is quite obvious they could care less about you, lack empathy and are just horrible people, tbh. Sure, you can be patient and avoid these people, but what about when you have to have important conversations because it involves the literal safety and health of others such as when speak up against and combatting racism. It's difficult and pretty much impossible to have conversations with people like this. Especially if they are not courteous and unwilling to listen and change even if you yourself are patient, do not fight back with emotion and also try not to be rude. Again, I feel like not speaking up and having important conversations like this is worse than avoiding these people.
Overall, it's an okay audiobook for people who are completely new to the topic. Anyone else may want to skip it or listen to it if they want a refresher. Not really a audiobook I would recommend.
I really wanted to bring myself to finish this audiobook, but I just couldn't. I was starting to fall asleep listening to it and just didn't want to waste anymore of my time. (I listened to 7 out of 10 chapters).
The facts presented here on how to be a better communicater and speaker are pretty obvious and things anyone who has studied speech/communication studies should know. Anyone not new to the topic; this audiobook is pretty much a recap and with some good reminders.
However, the reason I gave it such a low rating is because it doesn't really discuss up until where I listened, how to have important conversations with difficult people who are stubborn and unwilling to change; people where it is quite obvious they could care less about you, lack empathy and are just horrible people, tbh. Sure, you can be patient and avoid these people, but what about when you have to have important conversations because it involves the literal safety and health of others such as when speak up against and combatting racism. It's difficult and pretty much impossible to have conversations with people like this. Especially if they are not courteous and unwilling to listen and change even if you yourself are patient, do not fight back with emotion and also try not to be rude. Again, I feel like not speaking up and having important conversations like this is worse than avoiding these people.
Overall, it's an okay audiobook for people who are completely new to the topic. Anyone else may want to skip it or listen to it if they want a refresher. Not really a audiobook I would recommend.
December 4, 2020
AA:Very insightful and something that can be applied in every aspect of life and relationship.
May 30, 2020
Got this for free from Audible. Wouldn't have paid for it, or if I did, would have quit listening and requested money back.
Boring. Very repetitive. Questionable case studies.
Boring. Very repetitive. Questionable case studies.
April 10, 2021
I wanted to like this more. I think on a general level this could be a great book, but with my background and interests this seemed lacking in depth.
April 10, 2020
"How to Build Meaningful Relationships through Conversations" is a series of 10 self help lectures produced by The Great Courses, published by Audible, and performed by professinal communications coach Carol Ann Lloyd. A truncated version of this could be given as a TED Talk, and that is kind of how it sounded.
This gets its value from its applicability to our daily lives, regardless of our age or employment status. I learned some helpful things to keep in mind during my own professional and personal communications. Certain pertinent topics include: understanding different styles of speech, managing technology in modern conversations, and having clear goals that you want accomplished as a result of a conversation before beginning.
One of the great things about The Great Courses is that listeners get to hear from the experts themselves. However, one of the very downsides to The Great Sources can be the fact that the experts give their own talks. This might not be so apparent if watching a video, but when a sore speaker delivers an audio-only performance, it can really sour the experience. I know it's not something that Lloyd can really change, but I HAD to dock 1 star from my review because her voice was just so annoying. For a speaking coach, she has such a whiny way of speaking! I almost couldn't stand it. This would be a lot better as a mini-book than an audio production.
One of my favorite parts of this was the references to Shakespeare. He is a master storyteller and an excellent author to use for examples of conversation, because as a playwright, most of his renowned work involves characters speaking to one another. Lloyd's "real life" examples are all conglomerate cases with white-washed white suburbia names, which is boring and on-the-fence offensive, so those were unpleasant for me.
Either way, this is OK to listen to for some advice on how to have better conversations with others, especially for workplace professional settings. Wish I could get that annoying voice out of my head, so definitely only listen to once.
This gets its value from its applicability to our daily lives, regardless of our age or employment status. I learned some helpful things to keep in mind during my own professional and personal communications. Certain pertinent topics include: understanding different styles of speech, managing technology in modern conversations, and having clear goals that you want accomplished as a result of a conversation before beginning.
One of the great things about The Great Courses is that listeners get to hear from the experts themselves. However, one of the very downsides to The Great Sources can be the fact that the experts give their own talks. This might not be so apparent if watching a video, but when a sore speaker delivers an audio-only performance, it can really sour the experience. I know it's not something that Lloyd can really change, but I HAD to dock 1 star from my review because her voice was just so annoying. For a speaking coach, she has such a whiny way of speaking! I almost couldn't stand it. This would be a lot better as a mini-book than an audio production.
One of my favorite parts of this was the references to Shakespeare. He is a master storyteller and an excellent author to use for examples of conversation, because as a playwright, most of his renowned work involves characters speaking to one another. Lloyd's "real life" examples are all conglomerate cases with white-washed white suburbia names, which is boring and on-the-fence offensive, so those were unpleasant for me.
Either way, this is OK to listen to for some advice on how to have better conversations with others, especially for workplace professional settings. Wish I could get that annoying voice out of my head, so definitely only listen to once.
April 11, 2020
"The right conversation can help establish strong relationships, solve problems, create new opportunities, and build communities. The right conversation can change anything."
How to Build Meaningful Relationships Through Conversation by Carol Ann Lloyd is the most valuable Audible original I've listened to so far.
In it, Lloyd encourages listeners to analyse the effectiveness of the day-to-day conversations we all have. After all, conversations are how we share our lives and all our relationships depend on conversations.
But what makes an effective conversation?
The author uses the acronym REAL to define the term as:
• Relevant: matters to all parties involved
• Effective: accomplishes something important
• Affirming: respects every participant
• Legitimate: are essential and matter
She goes on to outline the elements of a good conversation as:
• Goal: to determine how the conversation progresses, what should be said and shouldn't be said, points that are acceptable and unacceptable.
• Complexities: are inevitable as people and relationships are inherently complex.
• Cost: both in terms of a REAL conversation - being vulnerable, getting out of your comfort zone, not being understood - and also in not having a conversation - lack of trust, missed opportunities and lasting damage to a relationship.
• Other people's needs: the interests, goals and needs of other people play a role. If something matters to someone else, it (usually) deserves a conversation.
• Silence: REAL conversations include moments of silence.
This short audiobook is split into ten lectures, each of which can be seen as a building block for an effective conversation that Lloyd brings to life through case studies.
Definitely worth a listen!
How to Build Meaningful Relationships Through Conversation by Carol Ann Lloyd is the most valuable Audible original I've listened to so far.
In it, Lloyd encourages listeners to analyse the effectiveness of the day-to-day conversations we all have. After all, conversations are how we share our lives and all our relationships depend on conversations.
But what makes an effective conversation?
The author uses the acronym REAL to define the term as:
• Relevant: matters to all parties involved
• Effective: accomplishes something important
• Affirming: respects every participant
• Legitimate: are essential and matter
She goes on to outline the elements of a good conversation as:
• Goal: to determine how the conversation progresses, what should be said and shouldn't be said, points that are acceptable and unacceptable.
• Complexities: are inevitable as people and relationships are inherently complex.
• Cost: both in terms of a REAL conversation - being vulnerable, getting out of your comfort zone, not being understood - and also in not having a conversation - lack of trust, missed opportunities and lasting damage to a relationship.
• Other people's needs: the interests, goals and needs of other people play a role. If something matters to someone else, it (usually) deserves a conversation.
• Silence: REAL conversations include moments of silence.
This short audiobook is split into ten lectures, each of which can be seen as a building block for an effective conversation that Lloyd brings to life through case studies.
Definitely worth a listen!
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