Two Cranes Press presents A Field Guide to Surreal Botany , an anthology of fictional plant species that exist beyond the realm of the real, fully illustrated in gorgeous full-color by Janet Chui. The specimens contained herein--dutifully and, in some cases, painfully recorded by our keen-eyed assortment of contributing cryptobotanists, field researchers, and graduate assistants (laden with glass jars, magnifying glasses, and appropriate body armor)--are organized according to geographical region, and described in erudite detail by our contributors.
Inside the book you’ll find specimens such as the Couch Kelp ( Siturfatarscea velvetorleva monthlypaymetis ), a floating seaweed with an inflatable bladder resembling a sofa; the Big Yellow Flower of Unnecessarily Obvious Information ( Explanatum obviosis ), a plant with a flower that is big and yellow; Twilight Luon-Sibir ( Russica spectrata ), which has an extremely short life cycle and exists in a state of probability; and forty-five other plant species from all over the world and beyond.
Not since Cryptethnophytology of Latin America by Dr. Dean Jameson (Palgrave, 1978), Asian Pomological Fantastika by Sng Chen Whye (Tinhau UP, 1981), or Parallel Botany by Leo Lionni (Knopf, 1977), has such a comprehensive volume of surreal flora been assembled in one place. Produced in conjunction with the Surreal Botanists Association, A Field Guide to Surreal Botany is an unforgettable tour through the fantastical plant kingdom.
Table of Contents
"(Floating) Armor of The Dark Blue Heart, Armorea Navum ," by Susan Fedynak "Attercopp plant, Chelicereae Telacaulum ," by Alexandra O'Neal "Avian Trumpetflower, Trochilium avifructus ," by Andrew Nicolle "Baby cabbage, also regionally referred to as The Leaf, Squallroot or Mother's Little Helper, Cruciferae Brassica homogenesis ," by Jay Lake "big yellow flower of unnecessarily obvious information, Explanatum obviosis ," by Elizabeth Langford "Bitter Mortar, Cucurbitaceae Marah ," by Steve Himmer "Bone Garden, otherwise known as Adam's Ribcage, Aloe skelaphalia ," by Eric J. Millar "Burning Bush Fungus, Encephalitozoon Elysium ," by John Bowker "Clickweed, Everricula Pilolaqueus ," by Ann Leckie "Cloud Anemone, Bromeliaceae Tillandsia nebularia ," by James Trimarco "Couch Kelp, Siturfatarscea velvetorleva monthlypaymentis ," by Jonathan Wonham "Devil’s Pork, Tuberaceae Tuber ," by John Black "Dream Melons, Melo somnio ," by Joe Hansen "Esemtep, Unclassified ," by Steve Berman "Fairy apple, timewarp lemon, Atlantis Mandrake, Podophyllum sidhe ," by Lucy A. Snyder "firefly bellflower (Tintinnabulum photuris), Tintinnabulum photuris ," by Francesca Forrest "Flame Lily, Nymphaeaceae-flammiferum ," by Matthew Baugh "Forget-me-bastard, Myosovictimis uncertae sedis ," by Elaine Clift "Giant Cloud Lily, Liliaceae Lilium ," by Patricia L. Havis "Haunt Vine (also known as Ghostroot and Spirit Creeper), Ipomoea Umbris ," by Mark Teppo "Kitty Willow, Salix ambulara ," by Mary E. Lowd "Kvetching aspen, Populus kvetchis ," by H.F. Gibbard "Lautokan Ear-blossom Plant (Tautau e vata), Auriculula cosmetales ," by Brendan Carson "Leonidas' Bloom, Campanula lacedaemia ," by Adam Nakama "Library Plum, Bibloteca prunus ," by Merrie Haskell "Nightmare Lotus, Nymphae somnium maledictus ," by Kris Dikeman "Ozymandias-plant, Lamiaceae (Genus unknown) ," by Cassandra Phillips-Sears "Padmamukhi (the Lotus-Mouthed), Nelumbonaceae nelumbo ," by Shveta Thakrar "Poliphila, or 'Shriner Vine', Unclassified ," by Victoria Elisabeth Garcia "Queen Victoria’s Bloomers, Monkey Ho, Caligula homocopulus ," by Eric Schaller "Screaming Mimi, Datura clamo ," by Yvonne Pronovost "Shade’s Globe ( Sibylwort), Umberia medianus ," by Darja Malcolm-Clarke "Singing Grass, unknown ," by David Kelly "Stag-eye nettle, Urtica aboculus ," by January Mortimer "Swift River Hopping Pitcher Plant, Pseudosarracenia verdeverminus ," by Suzanne Palmer "Teslated Salishan Evergreen, Cupressuceaohm salishan nikola ," by Livia Llewellyn "The Faerie Hogweed, Heracleum ignotum ," by Philip J. Lees "The Nabokov, Unclassified , by Stephanie Campisi and Ben Peek "The Poseur Nosehairs, Animaceae Sominus ," by Toiya Kristen Finley "The Sembla, Spasmodicus plasticosa ," by Matthew Kressel "Thuringian Shade-tree, Umbropsida noctalus ," by Catherine Gunson "Time Cactus, Chronocactus hematophageis ," by Christopher M. Cevasco "Twilight Luon-Sibir, Russica spectrata ," by Vera Nazarian "Ugly Tree, Medusa's Hairbrush, Acer horrendoturpis ," by Tom Pendergrass "Waterbaby Cress, Nasturtium Charleskingsleni ," by Erik Amundsen "Whistle tree, Catalpa musicalis ," by Shweta Narayan "Wild Homilywort (var. Speechtree), Quercus loquatium ," by Alex Chambers "Wind melon, Saturn melon, God's Eyes, Cucumis melo helioaero ," by Dave Coulter
Janet Chui currently lives in Singapore, where three things occupy her time: her young daughter, her “day job” (leading history tours) and art-making. When she has free time, she gardens, sews stuff, reads books about everything, and watches British TV. Her story "Black Fish" was published in the zine Say..., and received an Honorable Mention in volume 18 of The Year's Best Fantasy and Horror.
I'm calling this an anthology, but it's not, really. This is exactly what it claims to be: a field guide. But, you won't find the plants listed growing nearby, unless you live on the borders of Faerie and are able to wander back and forth at will. A lovely book, illustrated with gorgeous pictures of many of the plants.
These days you have to crinkle the map a bit to find any edges, but that makes the edges no less real. And still at the edges of the map lie not only dragons and other fauna, but quite curious flora as well, though in some instances the distinction is difficult.
"A Field Guide to Surreal Botany" begins with an elegant introduction to the world of surreal botany, and its move to the underground of science since the eighteenth century. But:
"The publishers of this book believe that the time for remaining ignorant of surreal botany has come to an end. Personal safety alone would justify the information on some of these specimens coming to light, and readers will surely appreciate learning of the plants whose threats are lesser, or that are disappearing as the plants themselves become more rare. This book may be read and appreciated by gardening enthusiasts, paranormal investigators, and conspiracy theorists alike."
To that last list, I would add: the whimsically creative, the writer dry of ideas, precocious children, geneticists, and perhaps those very surreal plants themselves as are capable of assimilating information from this printed form. The guide delights with forty-eight detailed and researched (and in the case of the Big Yellow Flower of Unnecessarily Obvious Information, perhaps overly detailed and researched) plants (or plant-like beings, or vaguely plant-like things) that exist across the Americas, Europe, Africa, Asia and the Pacific, and in some cases "beyond".
That is not to say the book is without flaw--with so many contributors, the tone at times falls from the requisite scientific to more mundane turns of phrase; and some of Janet Chui's wonderful illustrations, for me, fall short of perfection. And while I'm wishing, I really could have gone for a more thorough set of indexes--it's frustrating to remember a plant and have to go scan the table of contents, where they're alphabetized per region.
Really, though, it is a beautiful book, and the humor and erudition is more than consistent enough to carry the bemused reader away--they do warn you about some of those plants! While the Forget-me-bastard merely causes itching, stinging, and rash, the Time Cactus can trick the unwary researcher or amateur botanist into a quite deadly trance (sending nutrients back along a wormhole to previous times of scarcity). I would recommend a copy of this book to be nestled in among any collection of its more prosaic ilk.
My favourite is probably the ancient plant that generates a wormhole anchored in the space-time location of the budding flower. The wormhole slowly lengthens as the flower grows, allowing the plant to shift nutrients from periods of plenty back in time to periods of famine, ensuring survival over hundreds -- or in one case, millions -- of years. Various specimens are World Heritage-listed because careful use allows certified researchers to observe the American Civil War or a herd of herbivorous dinosaurs. Trips of more than an hour are invariably fatal, however, due to the plant's toxic spines.
A field guide to slip into the interstices of the real ones.