Jess’s Comments (group member since Feb 23, 2010)

Jess’s comments from the Q&A with author Jess Gulbranson group.

This thread is for your haiku. I will share some of mine- though I far prefer senryu. Here's one from my days at the Portland Fiction Project:

I reject the meat
it don't know when to lie down
on the smooth, cold floor

I've consulted a couple of experts on this issue to give you the best possible answer:

Gunnery Sgt. Jack Meihoffer advises that you take a firm Weaver stance with your .50 cal Desert Eagle and apply two shots to the head in close succession, what is known as a doubletap.

Dr. Adrian Yeo lists a number of tools that you will need for an emergency tonsilectomy, but I omit them for space reasons.

Last, economist Wild "Bill" Tolliver suggests that you wait just a couple of short months until my books "ANTIPALADIN BLUES" and "10 A BOOT STOMPING 20 A HUMAN FACE 30 GOTO 10" are out from Evil Nerd Empire and LegumeMan Books respectively. This will stimulate both the economy and your love life.

But until then, how to deal with the stank? My own personal expert advice is a gas mask. Not only utilitarian, but an excellent fashion choice. Chicks in gas masks are hawt!

If what 'they' say is that the female in question is Lady Gaga, I am told that it is not true.