Proud Of It! discussion

list them, so you know what to look out for! I have acually avoided alot of times I was going to cut from leaving the situation, here is mine:

- my dad
- my mom
- school
- stress
- the mirror
- eating
- cutting
- anger
- depression
- being sad
- good moods
- loud brothers
- family
- people
- losing freinds
- being alone
- head-aches
- being sick
- people staring at me
- people spreading things about me
- being lesbian
- being unsure
- being teased for waring long-sleeved shirt by family
- being teased for waring the same long-sleeved shirt for more than two days by my own family
- taking a shower
- chores
- remembering
- everything

Remembering stupid things I did in the past
My thoughts when I get down
My seeing of how my friends don't care for me anymore
Being ignored more than once in multiple places by the same group of people
The mirror
My social problems
and a few more..

Seeing my scars
Remembering the past
Being bullied
The scale

Looking at my arms and seeing my scars( but this always helps remind me to never go back to who I was then)
My parents fighting
Remembering all the people who betrayed me
Stress
Missing my brother
Not being able to do my favorite sport
Someone who helped me through the most difficult time in my life is leaving and I may never see him again.
Being overprotected
Having no privacy

I can't say that they are triggers for self-destructive behaviors for me anymore. I've been to a lot of counseling and read a lot of self-help books. I can confidently say that I feel nearly healed... but there are a few things that'll put me in a gloomy mood...

- seeing my scars
(not from cutting; it was from a bullying incident...)
- being left out or ignored
(everyone always seems to be hanging out without me)
- being teased for what I like
(I'm a big kid at heart and though I'm grown, I still get a little embarrassed and hurt when people say things like "You watch Scooby Doo? Isn't that, like, for kids? Aren't you too old for that?")

I am with you on the last two.

seeing my scars.... on my legs when I feel off my bike and I cut it..

stupid people.. THEIR JUST SO STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my dog when she keeps farting... it's just SO GROSS.

... well....

kids at school..
regular people..

twilight fans that dis Harry potter but then give STUUUUUUUUUUPPPIIIDDDD reasons why

Guys I don't know if I'm going to help a little. Everyone probably tells you this. I'm young. I'm a little kid. Just me. When I read this I feel really sad. I know what it feels like to just be bullied. It happens to me. I know you guys won't believe me but your heart may not be actually bigger than you brain but it really is. You might hate yourself, feel like your not worth it. Feel like whenever someone looks at you they comment on how ugly you are, you may look at people and wish you could be them for a day but it's all crap.
You're you because your you.
This is yuck I know but...
You were racing as sperm and YOU got to the egg in time.
You might wanna get out and live as someone else but I really believe that there's something in the world for each and every one of us. Things may have gone to the ditch now but it's not over tell its over. Please don't make over any sooner. This sounds like just another person telling you this. Telling you stuff you think isn't true but please know,
Everything happens for a reason and you are here. You stand here. You control you. We worked for our place in the earth. Life is good. It really is, because in life there is this thing called love. Maybe you don't have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, I know I sure as hell don't but you can find love anywhere. Not even with a human being and love is free. Please, for me....
Please don't look in the mirror and think ugly. Please don't cover yourself in make up and cry over yourself.
Please just smile.
Smile:)
Go out and enjoy yourself. Ignore the mirror but don't call yourself ugly.
Love yourself and you will be loved. Even the ugliest woman in the world can look beautiful if she just puts her head high and proves everyone wrong. You can do that.
You really can!

Thanks Jo:)

I really like that Jo, it made my day :)

Really it makes me so upset when you guys feel you aren't good enough. You control your happiness. Nobody else.

There are just some days it's hard to convince yourself to be happy.

I know. I just want you to find that person who is telling you otherwise and tell then to go die in a hole. Please guys....
If you say to yourself... I am happy... I know that you can do it. I really know. Your mind is stronger than anything else u know...

Yeah. Ok.

Thanks Jo :)

That's ok. Guys, next time you feel like this, would you be able to tell me. I might not know much but I will want to at least help you. As much as I can. As good as I can, before you do any self damage. I just want the best. You only live life once.
God I had that phrase. Though as true as it may be...

I gotta sleep now.
Have wonderful dreams...
You are beautiful k? I don't even know you but I think every one is. Maybe coz that stupid mirror wants to get you down. Well stuff that.
Coz since when do I believe in the judgement of a reflection right? You make the rules from here on. YOU!!!!!
Love y'all:)

Yeah. I haven't in almost 5 weeks. At camp, I promised my friend I wouldn't ever again and and I am going to do everything it takes to keep that promise. If I do though, I will come to you.

Gtg. Love you guys!

:)

Thanks for everything, Jo. :)

Thanks, Jo :) I know I already said this, but you made my day :D

Thanks, Jo. That was really sweet :)

Honestly, I know how hard it is. When there is a little voice saying cut yourself you ugly being. I want you to know that you are you and that your worth it.

Guys. Please read my story Mixed Emotions ..... comment and tell me what you think?

Yeah. That voice isn't you, you are you. Your the only one who controls you.

One of my frenemies

Me too

Thanks yeah my frenemie isn't dat bad she is just real childish lol

everything except happy stuff like love and laughing

Yeah, I can understand that

Abuse
Mental problems
Father
Mother (not very much)
My broken family
Stress
Temptation
Frantic feeling, needing to get calm
Hate
Friends
Trust issues
Fights....
A lot more

1.) My ex friend.

2.) My mom.

3.) Haters of the LBGT community.

4.) Being critiqued on anything other than my writing.

5.) People that are convinced that in order to be into Yaoi you either have to be gay or an old perverted man.

(First of all, just because you're gay doesn't necessarily mean you're into Yaoi, and second of all most Yaoi fangirls are both teenagers and females. Its statistically proven.)

1. Abuse of any kind.
2. Racism
3. People who yell.
4. Ignorance.
5. Haters
6. People who text while driving.
7. Narcissists

1. People who are mean to me or my crush or my friends when I am not around
2. Ignorance
3. Bullying

ANY UPSETTING SITUATION

losing my knife in a hotel
thinking about my cousin
boys making fun of me for being "the tough girl"
looking at my feet...why toes, why????

Nobody should be PUNISHED for making bad descisions...you know that. Punishment is old fashioned and uneccesary...restorative justice is the way forward. How can you stop it happening again...Human Animals respond to pain..but only in a pavlovian reactive way. Everything alive responds positively to sunshine !

Is that why you wanted to be punished yesterday? Oh Sora, you do not need to be punished.

-My sexual orientation
-the mirror
-the girls locker room
-all the sun scars on my arms

((These trigger sadness, not behavior changes.))

I have a skin thing that I didn't know about until second grade, before then I rarely put on sunscreen so I have dark splotches on both arms,

I wouldn't quite say that.... Gtg, bed.