Writer's Advice and Feedback Group discussion

I hope you guys will like my incomplete story, I am really bad at English, so will you not criticize spelling/grammar mistakes, because I know there will be many of them! I want you to criticize anything involving the story/plotline! I need some feedback! So thanks for reading my stories! I will post the first little bit in just a min! Oh and if you have any ideas for my title Pls tell meh!

CHAPTER 1

It's late, I finally turn the light off. My eyes are burnt with the light of the computer screen. I glance at the clock again hoping for morning. 1:37 it says. Not Morning! Sometime around 2:00 my eyelids get to heavy to stay open and I sink into a light sleep.
My alarm clock bursts me awake with a loud rock song from the 1970’s. Why do I even have that on my iPhone?? Whatever I have to delete it later but I

have other thing to worry about right now. I slump over to turn off the ear-aching noise. As I get out of the bed, my covers create a small wind that sends me small chills.
My pajamas are not helping the cold. I alway wear the pajamas with a thin, short sleeve white shirt, high shorts with a pink backround and white polka dots and my beloved knee-high socks!
I snatch my computer and crawl back in my warm,

and fuzzy covers. My laptop fits comfortably between me and my pillow!
Finally, I get started with my work. I go onto my favorite website, www.fanfictory.com, and I start writing my fan fiction like I do every day! I have so many fanfictory accounts it's insane! My most popular one is about Harry Potter but, I'm really proud of my Heroes of Olympus one.

:)

Hahahaha thanks!!