Suicide, a no go discussion

This is my story:

I had a best friend. She knew everything about me. We were constantly together. I got bullied at school, she defended me. She was like my sister. I didn't want to drive back to my house so she did. A red pickup truck hit us. She was flung through the windshield. She died. I was flung out of the car and the car fell on top of my legs. I woke up in a hospital and I couldn't move my legs. I was told that she had died. I was heartbroken. When I finally went back to school, her other friends called me a murder. That hurt so much. I get bullied. She isn't there to defend me. I have thought of suicide so many times. I cut myself. I don't eat. I miss her so much. I just wish the pain would stop.........

Sometimes the biggest smile contains the most pain

I'm so sorry. One of my close friends committed suicide and it hurts so much.. there isn't a day where I just flat out cry. But please don't leave. I know it hurts but please don't hurt yourself. Message me if you need anything hun