Light discussion

I'm working straight through the weekend so that Monday and Tuesday are my days off next week. One of the flexibilities of retail work (okay, one of the only flexibilities of retail work) is that I can do that. My two days off don't have to be the same as they were the week before. Having Monday and Tuesday off means I can jet down to New York for the evening, and go to my first ever Lambda Literary Awards. Even better, my "plus one" is going to be Rob Byrnes, without whom I never would have likely written anything for beyond my own amusement.

This trip to New York, though, is because Light, my first novel, is a finalist in the "LGBT SF/F/HORROR" category.

Am I nervous? Well, yes and no. On the one hand, I'm over-the-moon because I'm a finalist. This is my category, the kind of stuff I love to write, and to be perfectly frank I was also completely gobsmacked. I'd read Richard Bowes, Alex Jeffers and Lee Thomas already - to be included with these fellows is like being asked to sit at the grown-ups table for the first time. Since then, I've managed to also read Marie Castle and I adored her book.

So, nervous? Yes - in the sense that I'm going to a big literary event and I'm not doing so as a bookseller, but as an actual writer. Yes - in the sense that this is very much one of those dreamed about moments. But no - not in the sense of whether or not I hope to win. That there are literary awards for LGBT authors - and ones as well-known and as impactful as the Lammies - is win enough.

Speaking of wins... Recently I got back from the Saints and Sinners Literary Festival where I was also up for an Emerging Writer's Award - I didn't win, and there was no pain in the losing. Juliann Rich won the award, for her gay YA book Caught in the Crossfire, which I look forward to grabbing (it just released). Meeting her in New Orleans was a treat, and perhaps that's another part of why it doesn't matter if I don't win - I'm starting to know so many of the authors in the LGBT writing world, that whoever wins, I'm celebrating their happiness. Does that sound all huggy and dopey? Too bad.

I've been a bookseller for most of my life and I know that it would be a boring world if everyone liked the same things. The Lammy category itself is so wonderfully diverse - science fiction, fantasy and horror - that I feel a little bit guilty for the judges - how do you choose? In all honesty, I don't think I could choose between just the four books I've read from the finalist list: they're all wonderful books, and very different from each other.

I guess that's a long winded way of saying "I'm just happy to be nominated." But I am.

This last year has been one heck of a ride. If you're in New York, please say hello!