Chicks On Lit discussion

Setting up this thread for our April 2017 Group Read of "Me Before You" by Jojo Moyes. Discussion leader will be Kasey.

Who would like to join us for this one? (you are welcome to join in the discussion even if you have previously read this book, which given the popularity of this one I am sure many have).

I am in

I already read this. I will watch the conversation, however. I hope you all really enjoy it.

I'm in. I just got it from the library. I haven't read it yet

I have read it. I will participate in the discussion

I just finished it so I am in for the discussion.

Kasey, do you have a discussion schedule you would like to use for reading and discussing this one?

I apologize for the delay in getting this set up - but I am super excited to lead this discussion!!

April 2nd - start reading. Read through chapter 6.
April 8th - discuss chapters 1-6. Read through chapter 14.
April 15th - discuss chapters 7-14. Read through chapter 22.
April 22nd - discuss chapters 15-22. Read through chapter 27 & epilogue.
April 29th - Discuss entire book.

Please let me know if anyone would like to make adjustments to the reading schedule. This will have us reading between 90-100 pages each week, to complete the book by the end of the month. :-)

Sounds great Kasey, thank you for posting a schedule. I have read this one previously, but will be following along and chiming in as you go. :-)

Disclaimer - I have not read this book. So any questions that I pose come purely from the thoughts of a first-time reader. Also, it seems like this might be a bit of a predictable book, so it's also possible that it may look like I know the outcome - but I promise, I do not! :-) Also, I have purposefully avoided watching the trailer for the movie counterpart, so I am coming into this read with only the information based on the goodreads synopsis.

That being said - let's start with some discussion questions!

What are your initial first impressions of the main characters? How do Will and Patrick compare/contrast with one another?

It seems as though there is immense pressure from Lou's family for her to provide them with some sort of income. How do you think the family dynamics will impact the plot of the story? How does this compare with Will's family?

If you were in Lou's position, do you think you could have been so bold with Will when he has been repeatedly rude to her? It seems like her being direct with him was a pivotal moment in their relationship, as no one else has ever stood up to him before and everyone else appears to walk on eggshells around him.

What are some of the key forces at play that may contribute to Lou and Will falling in love with each other?

My first impression of Patrick was he and Lou have been dating for so long Patrick seemed to take Lou for granted. He never seemed to be home or wanting to spend much time with her. I don't know if that was because he was training but the training seemed to take up all his time.

Will- My first impression was he is spoiled and entitled. He lived doing whatevcer he wanted and now he felt he couldn't.

I felt Lou was under pressure to be the sole bread winner for her family. I didn't know why her sister couldn't contribute. I would understand if Lou resented the fact she had to be the sole paycheck of the family. Lou's family is doing their best to get by where Will's family is very well off and they don't ever worry about money.

I was disgusted by all the family dynamics. Lou's family is so mean spirited toward her and yet expect her to take care of an entire, extended family. Will's family has no family dynamic. They're a bunch of rich people living under the same roof. I found Lou to be surprisingly brave and resilient considering the ridicule she was regularly subjected to. And I would agree that Lou and Patrick have been dating too long. They're too comfortable

I have also read this book, but am interested to see every's take on it, so will definitely follow along with the discussion

I feel that Patrick and Lou have been in their relationship so long that it is just a habit more so than a relationship.
As for Lou's family I think they each have their own issues and are so self absorbed that they don't think of each other or the family as a whole.
The other thing I'd like to say is I have not read the book nor seen the film yet it seems vaguely familiar, does anyone else feel they've read it before?

I was glad to see Lou's sister did change towards Lou and wanted to actually help her. This was after her sister went away to school. I think the sister started to mature once she was out of the house.

First impressions: I liked Lou enough, but found her family to be annoyingly dependent on her. I thought Will seemed like a downright jerk. Patrick seemed neglectful, at least in his relationship with Lou. Ironically, I thought Will seemed more interesting than Patrick - like he has done more things and experienced more. Patrick seemed boring and predictable to me.

I'm wondering how Lou's family dynamics will impact her relationship with Will. I'm currently anticipating that they will pressure her to continue with the job, despite Will's attitude, and I predict they will do this even after Will does something disastrous (I don't know what this might be, but I'm thinking this will be the turning point in the plot). Will's family seems super distant and disconnected. I'm curious to learn about their family dynamics. It seems like his mom is a helicopter mom, who is oblivious to his dad's indiscretions. I'm wondering if this is something that has always been there, or if it worsened or appeared after Will's accident.

Also - side note. But the hopeless romantic in me is hoping Will will have a complete change in attitude, and possibly have his spinal cord injury reversed. In this way, I was getting some "Beauty and the Beast" vibes from the story line.

I think I liked Lou the most when she stood up to Will - and I think this definitely is a turning point in their relationship. I think she is going to challenge him to re-evaluate his attitude and his view on life, which is going to cause him to fall in love with her. However, I haven't quite figured out how/why she is going to fall in love with him. Am I getting ahead on myself here? I'm very confident this is going to happen (they will fall in love) lol.

I think Patrick being wrapped up in his training and oblivious to Lou is going to make her lonely and longing for a connection with someone. Their relationship is so routine - nothing new or exciting. This will push her towards Will, because I guess in a way, his jerk attitude will challenge her. I also think her staying with the job (largely due to family pressure) is going to make it seem like she has a high tolerance level, which I think Will will admire.

I think this about summarizes my thoughts so far. lol

Kasey wrote: "First impressions: I liked Lou enough, but found her family to be annoyingly dependent on her. I thought Will seemed like a downright jerk. Patrick seemed neglectful, at least in his relationship w..."

I am staying quiet on some of your comments because I don't want to say anything too soon. I had read the book previously to this discussion.

I apologize again for the delay in discussion questions! Things got rather busy with the Easter weekend, and I forgot to take that into consideration for this discussion.

I feel like this section denoted more background of family dynamics as it impacts Will and Lou's relationship - and the overall progression of the story. There was a lot of deep topics that could potentially be discussed from this section as well, so I'm going to break those up a bit by only putting out a few questions to ponder at a time.

First, how important is sex to a relationship? Chapter 7 talks a lot about how gradually Lou and Patrick stopped having sex, going down to only 2x per month, which made her question her attractiveness. In the same chapter, Lou becomes inadvertently more intimate with Will, by cutting his hair and shaving his face. What is the significance of this, if any?

What do you think of Lou's responsibility to "prevent" Will from completing suicide? Were you shocked to learn that Will had made this attempt, and now as considering an assisted suicide? Did you think it was fair for the family to employ Lou for this specific purpose without telling her? What would you have done if you were in Will's family's position?

(See what I mean?! A lot of heavy stuff! lol I'm going to stop for now and add more questions later! Happy pondering!)

I guess sex is important to a relationship. I don't think it the only thing to a relationship. I wasn't surprised that Lou fell in love with Will. She spent more time with Will than her boyfriend.

Lou already knew Will tried to commit suicide. Will had scars. I don't think it was fair on Lou not to know however ignorance is bliss. Lou many not have taken the job if she had known. I don't blame her for trying to show Will there was more to live for. I don't think Will really gave himself a fighting chance. If I was in Will's family's position, I don't know. They need someone to care for Will. I think his family should have said it was a temporary position. Then Lou would have asked why.

Next section of questions.

What did you think about the change in narration, to be able to get Camilla's POV? Were you better able to empahtize with her after reading her chapter?

What do you think of Lou's plan to make Will experience life in the hopes of making him want to live again? Do you think this is wise? Or is it likely to backfire?
What were your thoughts on their first outing?

How might Lou's background with sexual assault affect her relationships with the men in her life? (dad, Will, Patrick)

I liked Lou's plan to have Will experience life. I was all for that. Their first outing could have been planned better.

I didn't catch that she was sexually assaulted but that could play a factor in having relationships and interacting with men. Lou must have come to terms with it since she wanted a relationship with Will and she had a relationship with Patrick.

Now, let's talk about Lou's birthday party! What did you think of Patrick's jealousy of Will? Was there anything else that stood out to you about her birthday party?

Now I'm going to provide my own thoughts. :-)

I do think sex is pretty important in a relationship; if nothing else, it seems like physical intimacy is important - as least to Lou. I think the lack of sex between her and Patrick led to her low self-esteem (especially after we discovered that she was sexually assaulted in the castle's garden when she was younger). She has a need to feel desired, and lack of sex meant that need wasn't being met. I think the physical intimacy of shaving Will caught her off guard, and probably reminded her of the things she's been missing in her relationship with Patrick.

I thought the responsibility to prevent a suicide from happening was a big one - too big, actually, for one person alone. I felt that if Will's parents were this concerned, they should have staffed for round-the-clock supervision, and not put the sole responsibility on Lou. I was a bit shocked to learn of Will's suicide attempt, because I had originally interpreted the cuts on his wrists to have been self-harm, not suicide attempts. As for assisted suicide, I have mixed feelings, but can see why Will would be drawn to this sort of "solution" because it would be really difficult to go from living a "full and fulfilling" life to then be confined to a wheelchair in which others are doing everything for you... I have been a bit surprised that Will's parents didn't find these alternative options for him, such as the program Lou found for will to type his own messages. I guess I feel like Will's parents didn't seek out all the resources they could have, because they are trying to save face and reputation or something. They seem preoccupied with holding up the ideal image for society, and struggling with their own issues behind closed doors. I was a bit surprised that Will's mom was agreeable to the assisted suicide, but I liked that we got to read her POV so I could have some empathy for her.

I really liked Lou's plan, and I liked her determination to see it through - to find ways to make these outings happen and be successful. And to get Will's input! At first, she made too many assumptions with taking him to the horse races; but once Will had a say - things went very smoothly and it sounded like a perfect date at the opera. Which is interesting because it wasn't supposed to be a date.

As for Lou's birthday party. Well, I loved it. lol I don't really like Patrick. He is too show-boaty, especially with his gift for her. And I think he had reason to be jealous, when he saw Lou feeding Will and the intimacy in that act. I guess the reason I don't like him is because he is one of those guys who waits until it's too late. He doesn't make the necessary efforts, and then he overcompensates later. I think after the birthday party, Lou said they had sex and "I think he would've swung me from the chandelier if he could've". It's just telling. Like, no, Patrick.. if you had been paying attention this whole time, you wouldn't feel the need to go all out with sex later. And besides, he's MISSING THE POINT! She needs intimacy and sex is not necessarily that.
Anyways. I LOVED Will's gift for her. I thought it was incredibly thoughtful. It showed that he has been paying attention to her, and he has noticed the little things.

I understand Will's life would change after the accident. I feel he didn't give his life after the accident a chance. You can be in a wheelchair and still have a full life. I am just surprised Will chose assisted suicide. He didn't seem to consider other options.

I thought Lou's birthday party was a nice gathering. I thought it was nice of Will to want to come. If Patrick felt jealousy the he should contribute more to the relationship and not just provide sex.

I also didn't really understand (view spoiler)[why Will chose assisted suicide. I would have loved this book had it not been for the ending. I think the ending left me with the feeling that the moral was that a life lived disabled is not a life worth living. And that is something I disagree with completely. (hide spoiler)]

I agree with you Shelia.(view spoiler)[ I am visually impaired. I live a life. I have friends who are blind and in wheelchairs and they have lives too. My blind friends have jobs, are married, some of them have kids. They live a life. My friends who are in wheelchairs have a life. They may not have jobs but they have a social life and go out. Being in a wheelchair is not a death sentence. (view spoiler)[They might have to do things differently but they have a life. (hide spoiler)] (hide spoiler)]

Wahhh spoiler alert!!! lol I didn't know the ending. :-(

Oops....

Can you edit your posts to make them blocked by the spoiler alert tag, so that other people reading the thread and following the discussion don't end up knowing the ending? We are only 75% through the book at this point. Thanks!

Sorry Kasey. After reading your post on that topic in comment 23, "I thought the responsibilty to prevent..." I figured that had been covered.

I'm delayed in posting questions. So this is from chapters 15-22.

How do you think Will influenced Lou to finally start pursuing her own dreams? What made Will's opinion so motivating for her?

As Lou was looking for ideas to inspire Will to live, how do you think the online community impacted her endeavor?

Do you think it was appropriate for Will to offer for Lou to live with him? Why or why not?
What about Patrick's offer for Lou to move in with him?

How do you think Will "saving" Lou from the maze impacted their relationship, especially considering the sexual assault Lou had experienced there previously?

Do you think Patrick's gesture of the romantic dinner was too little too late to resolve things with Lou? Do you think he overreacted to Lou's plans to go on vacation with Will?

How do you think Will's family's finances impacted his situation? Especially considering one bloggers statement to Lou that "if you've got the funds to sort it all out, the sky's the limit." How would things have been different for him if his family had been poor like Lou's family?

Were you surprised when Lou admitted her feelings for Will?

Lastly... What did you think of Nathan's stance on Will's right to live? Saying that by others forcing Will to pursue various activities, they are taking away his choices? What factors influences each of our choices to live on a daily basis? How would our lives be different if we lost the freedom to choose?