Support for Indie Authors discussion

I would appreciate any constructive feedback on this blurb, whether it catches your interest, if you have any recommendations, and so on. Thank you in advance.
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Name of Book: Thread and Other Stories.

Blurb on back:
"I think therefore I am."
But is it really that simple?

Prudence and Yannick know poverty firsthand, heartache from the inside out, and injustice from the bottom up. When a young boy with needs beyond their own appears in their life, they must choose what kind of people they truly are. The choices they face have a dark backdrop, however. Is there more to this than what they can see?

Explore your perception of reality in Thread and then dive into worlds of intrigue, mystery, and excitement with a collection of short stories that range in genre from literary to dark fantasy, and sci fi to historical fiction. Trace the thread that connects them all to you.

Well honestly I have to say I like it and find little issue with it. The blurb for Thread is well-composed. It is vague, but in this case that works for it. The secondary blurb certainly makes it seem that Thread is the main interest of the collection, and presents the breadth of the short stories. Very good!

I think it sounds great! I love the intrigue and way the last paragraph draws the reader in. I totally want to figure out what connects them all to me.

One small suggestion, just because it caused me to pause during reading and go back, perhaps move 'however' to the beginning of that sentence and see if it helps the flow better. It could just be me.

No A.L., it's not just you. I stumbled at that point too, so I agree with you.

I also agree with what you and Isaac said . This is a very good blurb.

Piques interest. Nice and short and pithy.

I'd drop however altogether as it's about the only jarring note in para 1.

I'd rework two a little bit. Maybe:

Explore your perception of reality in Thread. Dive into a world of intrigue, mystery and excitement as you read a collection of short stories guaranteed to give a jolt to your imagination. Will you trace the Thread that connects each one to you?

Great blurb...there is a curiosity to it that draws the reader in.

I would remove the word "however." It disrupts the flow, but very nice!

Thank you everyone for taking the time to review and provide input. I appreciate it a lot. Here is a second try at the blurb, taking into account what you have said and modifying the second paragraph a little. If you have additional input, I welcome it.

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"I think therefore I am."
But is it really that simple?
Prudence and Yannick know poverty firsthand, heartache from the inside out, and injustice from the bottom up. When a young boy with needs beyond their own appears in their life, they must choose what kind of people they truly are. But, the choices they face have a dark backdrop. Is there more to this than just what they see?

Explore your perception of reality in Thread and dive into worlds of intrigue, mystery, and excitement in this collection of short stories. Trace the thread of reality as it weaves through the fabric of surreality until you discover how it connects each one to you.

There is something about the phrase: "poverty firsthand, heartache from the inside out, and injustice from the bottom up." That sits a little weird with me. I understand what you are trying to do in painting a picture of the world these characters live in, but poverty firsthand and injustice from the bottom up in my mind tell the same story. Maybe try reordering to shift the focus?

For example : Prudence and Yannick know heartache inside and out through poverty and injustice from the bottom up.

Overall the blurb is great, just the beginning I'm trying to fully grasp. It might just be me, as others have said they like it. Hope these thoughts help!

The second paragraph is too vague and would benefit from a rework focusing on clarity. I understand the goal is to hook the reader without giving too much away. But the reader needs an idea of what the story is about to consider buying the collection. For instance, a parent of a special needs child may dismiss the book right away because he may not want to read about a special needs child, or may choose it because he can identify. He should know before he buys the book. If the child is an entity from another part of reality or dimension or is created by thought, that’s a whole other ballgame. And a very interesting one, at that.

In the third paragraph (see my suggested version below), I deleted the phrase, you discover how it connects each one to you, because I am strongly turned off when an author tells me as the reader what to think. It’s a fiction writer’s job to convince me in his story, abstractly through theme and through the character arc, but not in plain language. But maybe that’s just me. I also revived the genre mixing from your original post. I think it’s important that the reader know the stories cross genres. So a sci-fi or horror junkie is not disappointed that the stories are not all in the genre he prefers.

How is this for the third paragraph:

Explore your perception of reality in Thread. Dive into worlds of intrigue and mystery with this genre bending collection. Trace the thread of reality as it weaves through the fabric of surrealism in each of these short stories.

Thanks again for comments. I did some rework and I really appreciate the ideas.

Frances: I liked what you had for your rework, except the genre "bending" part I'm on the fence with since it's really just a group of stories of different genres. Also I tried to make the description less vague.

T.: I tried to make the first sentence a little less stilted.
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"I think therefore I am."
But is it really that simple?

Prudence and Yannick know poverty, heartache, and injustice firsthand. When a young boy who has nowhere to turn appears in their life, they must choose what kind of people they truly are. Helping him could be beyond their means. Abandoning him seems unthinkable. But, the choices they face have an even darker backdrop. Is there more to this than just what they see?

Explore your perception of existence in Thread. Dive into worlds of intrigue and mystery with this cross-genre collection. Trace the thread of reality as it weaves through the fabric of surrealism.

Your final draft is much improved! I think you're missing the word "weaves" in the last sentence though.

Very nice, Eric. I love this version!

The last part I liked. Even the genres mentioned, the "genres" (because they are a few of my favorites) not the rest. It doesn't hold my attention as a reader.

does anyone else have an opinion on the list of genres? I felt like it interrupted the flow of the last paragraph, but I do like the idea of having them in there to let people know what they will be reading.

When I look into a book, I usually got pulled by either the cover or the blurb and one of the first thing I do after, is scrolled down to see what genre it is. So yes, I would appreciate an insight directly in the blurb. I think yours is subtle enough that I would still scroll to check it out so it's not really intrusive. I like it.

How about holding your historical fiction story for your next anthology? Have you considered separate collections for each genre or similar genres, or is the overall theme dependent on each story?

each story fits in to the theme, even the historical fiction.

How about something like this for the last paragraph:

Explore your perception of existence in Thread. Worlds of intrigue and mystery are interwoven by stories from different genres ranging from literary to dark fantasy, and sci fi to historical fiction. Trace the thread of reality as it weaves through the fabric of surrealism.