Everything Geeky! discussion

Here is the link to my writing. I would appreciate some comments on how I could make it better. Thanks :)

https://www.goodreads.com/story/show/...

Well, every time a new person speaks, it should be a new paragraph. Also, perhaps a little bit of space between paragraphs would make it easier to read? And it should be Mages, not Mage's. Mage's is a possessive. And the roof type is thatched roof. There are still thatched houses in England.

It's good so far! I look forward to seeing what's next! =)

Okay thanks! :)

You're welcome! =)