Write, Wrote, Written discussion
Brianna's Writing
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Short stories
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The writing style is so similar to Jasmine's! You should check her story out it's alot like yours. It's even titled the same thing. Short Stories.
well thank you for the truth.. i will try to improve
i now right over used well i meant i will try to create something fresh and not so much "over used"
Mod
I mean, telling her that her writing is terrible and the topic is really 'over used' and that she will never make it good. That's really mean, actually.
Mod
I'm sorry your friends are getting bullied, Brianna...
World limit~The keys are the opening to a puzzle, the hard part is solving it.One door leads to another but what happens when you run out of doors to open?Does it stop or does it keep going? The world is a circle of life but what happens when it ends?Space is terribly big so are we alone?
The news said we weren't alone, and from what I see out of my house we are not alone. From a little window I saw the future, space ships swarm in the sky like frisbees. I closed my eyes wishing I was having a illusion, but as I opened my eyes I still saw the space ships. The first thought on my mind was are they here to fight .I quickly fell into a trance thinking of what was going to happen until my boyfriend knocked on the door. Scared to move I slowly opened the door and he came in and asked for water I of course pointed to the sink still scared to move. He took out a bowl and poured water in it. I then went cold, did I let in a Allen? He suddenly turned into a purply frozen thing. A storm of tears came out I was going to die.
I started to run I didn't care where I was going ,tear still ran down my face was the future going to end today, was this are last key to the door was the earth just meant to be overruled by these aliens. We aren't alone but the battle is fought on two sides earth v.s Allen
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::to be continued:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I disagree, Captain. Vampires aren't overused. BAD vampire stories are overused.
Awesome vampire stories never go out of style.
Zombies on the other hand, you can only do so much with them and yes, kinda overdone.
Brianna,I have to agree with Captain about your themes being a bit dull. I'm going to try and word my response differently though so it's less of a slap in the face and more a gentle nudge towards better writing.
First, watch your spelling, grammar, and sentence structure. If I have to grit my teeth to get through a story just because reading it hurts my eyes, the story itself gets lost and my annoyance at the hassle of reading it is all I'll remember about it.
Second, it's often unclear exactly what you're trying to get across. The last few sentences of this last story confused the hell out of me. What was this story actually about? Aliens? The imaginings of a schizophrenic girl?
If you love to write, don't stop. You'll improve with practice. But please, please read more. Reading is a key element to bettering your writing. Plus, it teaches better formatting, sentence structure and will expand your vocabulary.
Captain Maggots wrote: "I don't care what you think of it, there's still no such thing as "short storys"."Haha, true that!
Listen i am only 13 ok....so please lend me a break I can write better but listen I don't have all the time. To perfect my writing so if you please..but thanks for the comments
My head was filled with hate my arms full of scars . Life felt worthless , i got threats ,and people beat me up in bathrooms. I have never had love my mom gave me up for adoption at three.I was adopted by nice people but they were strict and never around. Thats why i never told them about be getting bullied , i felt like if i told them they would give me away for being a failure. I already sucked at school the bulling only made it worse instead of getting A- i get a D- usually because they flush my notes and homework in the toilet. I would have lost all hope in humanity if it weren't for amy, she told me every time they say a hate full comment turn it around and act like they are giving you a nice comments in french.It worked somedays ,but others not so much.I have asked them to stop, but they laughed at me. why did they hate me so much i never did any thing to them, never but they have there reasons, like i have mine.////Hi this is just a story but i am relating to some teens////so stop bulling today/////