The Reasons Why you wrote your book or books discussion

Twenty years as a psychotherapist showed me that I wasn't alone, that there are many women who are disappointed, frustrated, and despairing about their relationships. The happily-ever-after myth is so embedded in our culture we don't realize how it traps us in relationship misery and failures. The message in my book is what I needed as a young woman--that there is no substitute for growing a self and creating a full passionate life, that a man can't possibly be your fulfillment. See my book website for more information at www.sallywatkins.net.

I't hard on guys when we women want what they have not been socialized to provide. They're prepared to do the heavy lifting and make money but when we ask them to meet our emotional needs and even "daddy" us like our father never did, it naturally makes them defensive and angry. They sometimes conclude that they aren't able to please us and stop trying. The conflict comes from trying to get happiness, validation, and love from another when the only one you can change is yourself!

What we do to get more connection with a man often backfires, even couples counseling when the goal is to fix him. I spell it out exactly what to do instead. This has taken me a lifetime to understand and I wrote this book to save others from the dead ends and wrong turns I made.