The Procrastinators Book Club discussion

Welcome to the Know My Name Buddy Read Discussion thread! This thread officially opens on June 11th and anyone can join at any time. Please keep in mind that spoilers are allowed in this thread but only up to the group's current reading place. Do not spoil the book if you've read further than the group. Any extra days can be used to catch up!

Each day we will be reading by chapters or page numbers. Page numbers are an approximation based on the hardcover or paperback that is the default on Goodreads. The suggested Buddy Read discussion schedule is as follows:

Week of 06/11
June 11th: Chapters 1 - 2
June 12th: Chapters 3 - 4

Week of 06/13
June 13th: Chapters 5 - 6
June 14th: Chapters 7 - 8
June 15th: Chapters 9 - 10
June 16th: Chapters 11 - 12
June 17th: Chapters 13 - 14 + Victim's Statement

PARTICIPANTS
~ Brianna
~ Jen
~ Amelia

Hello, catching up a bit today. Read through Chapter 3.
Remembering the case and just how victims are treated in general makes me so angry.

I only knew of the basics of the story and the outcome. I didn't realize that he had been so creepy and aggressive the whole night with her sister. How awful that the defense is claiming there was consent when she was literally unconscious and incapable of consent. Why on Earth is having a boyfriend the only appropriate reason to not want to be assaulted by a stranger while passed out?

Thank goodness for those cyclists doing the right thing.

Finished chapter 4, those men in RI. So not cool. Did this only happen there or is she just more aware? I so feel for her trying to work through the trauma with so many triggers.

I forgot about that mass killing at UCSB. I am beyond with men killing because of their "forced celibacy".

Finished chapter 6. The court case was rough. Loved that she found some hopeful moments with the comedy and travel. I can't imagine being in such limbo.

Leading a workshop the next couple of days so I may get behind. Hope everyone is doing well.

Finished chapter 8. Fully cried during the verdict. I appreciate how she is able to highlight how imbalanced the portrayal of the attempted rapist vs the victim views really are. Really, his high school French teacher is necessary to say what a nice boy his is and would never assault an unconscious woman? How would she know...

In the middle-ish of Chapter 11. The sentencing. So hard to hear. That is the part that I most remember about the case. The judge is an utter a**. It really was so wrong.

I had no idea about the viral victim statement. June 2016, I had just moved to Zambia and was not tapped in. I'm enjoying hearing about the concrete effects of the case and the changes inspired by her statement. The negative consequences are harder to hear but I'm hopeful. Excited to finish this up this weekend.

Finished yesterday. So powerful and inspiring!

Sorry for the delay but I fell behind reading it - I just finished Chapter 5 and will be focusing on it through the weekend so I can finish sooner rather than later. So far it’s been hard but also so eye opening and she honestly says things I wish more people would say. When I get on my computer I’ll update again with more specifics.

No worries. I had to go slow but really well done.

Jen K wrote: "Hello, catching up a bit today. Read through Chapter 3.
Remembering the case and just how victims are treated in general makes me so angry.

I only knew of the basics of the story and the outcome..."

I honestly don't think I new that much about this before going in so a lot of this was new to me.

I very much did not know about how he was acting towards her sister either. It makes the outcome even more infuriating to be honest.

Jen K wrote: "Finished chapter 4, those men in RI. So not cool. Did this only happen there or is she just more aware? I so feel for her trying to work through the trauma with so many triggers.

I forgot about t..."

I honestly did not remember (or truly I don't think I even knew about it) the mass shooting but I'm pretty bummed that Chanel had to experience more than just one traumatic event. Truly I feel for *anyone* who has been through more than one - really even just one traumatic event. I feel like it makes her experience even more unique having the first hand (ish) perspective of what could happen when a guy doesn't get his way and having to apply that to the situation with Brock.

Seriously, she was haunted by not wanting to push Brock over the edge and causing a mass shooting. It is insane that it is even a reasonable possibility.

Jen K wrote: "Finished chapter 8. Fully cried during the verdict. I appreciate how she is able to highlight how imbalanced the portrayal of the attempted rapist vs the victim views really are. Really, his high s..."

I completely agree that she presented the imbalances really well. At one point she made a point that a lot of the defense was about what a mistake he made and how she is ruining his life and then on the same hand trying to say "you" "you" "you" and how bad of a person she was when she truly wasn't. All these things about how he never had a brush with the law beforehand or that he was so new to the drinking thing and yet he had run from the cops just a few months prior and how there were so many messages he sent involving all the different drugs he was trying. It's so frustrating how out of whack the system is when it comes to these types of cases.

The final thing I want to add to what you had already said is I didn't realize how many other things around sexual assault were happening at the same time - Trump's comments, Ben Cosby, the supreme court justice, the #MeToo movement - all of it. I think that is part of why her statement went viral - the timing was ripe for women to band together and truly make their voices heard. Although I was here in the states I don't think I remember it going viral. To be honest, I was still married to by decently abusive ex so any kind of media like that I tried to bypass. I don't know if I could have gotten through this story prior. I think I picked this book up at just the right time. I highlighted many passages that I plan on referencing when I need them - someone else's words about going through something and how hard it is but how it is possible to come out the other end - if not better at the very least existing.

(Also I hope she and Lucas are still together - he was truly a good guy)

Also hope that she and Lucas are together!! Was sad when he didn't come up as much at the very end.

Really good point about how society was ripe for her statement at that time. I'm glad it did go viral and there seems to be so many positive changes that came out it. Her words and story are so powerful for so many. I listened to the audio and her experience with spoken word definitely came out at times too. She is an amazing and inspiring lady!

It was a tough read though and definitely triggering on so many levels that definitely one has to be ready to read it. Glad that you are at that point with the ex a firm ex. This kind of thing always makes me reflect a bit harder than I want to on some past experiences and friends' experiences as well. Being female is more difficult than it should be sometimes.

I'm sorry I got so left behind with this one. I truly wanted to read it but struggled. Have been taking it really slow as I know the outcome and followed the case at the time hearing about all the other things happening at the time that I never heard about is hard