Irish Readers discussion

Hi all,

Have any of the members ever tried their hands at writing? And if so did they have any success?

Thanks
Joe

There's a few fellas with books on some thread here. Can't remember which one. Sure Vicki will link you when she comes on later.

I'm too lazy to be a writer. ;D
or direct traffic .....

I'd love to write something but I've never really attempted anything. Time, a subject and a general inability to make any sense are some of the hurdles I face... Do you write yourself Joe?

I try I try.

I've been writing poems and songs for years but I recently tried to write a story (from scratch like!)and I was amazed by how hard it was ha.

I've a bit done now but it's a tough slog.

Well we'll all tell you what we think when you're ready to show us a free preview/copy. ;]

yeah Joe! Show us show us show us!!!

I've an idea for a kids book (and it'll rock! has templar knights skateboarding on the top of Aviva, stadium, though that's just a minor episode ;) ) and been playing with it for a while but it's slow going (the writing that is...)...

Yeah, well fair play for starting it anyway Joe. Go on and throw some up for us:p We're all friends here....;)

Joanna wrote: "yeah Joe! Show us show us show us!!!

I've an idea for a kids book (and it'll rock! has templar knights skateboarding on the top of Aviva, stadium, though that's just a minor episode ;) ) and bee..."

EPIC!

That it'll be! I just need to... well.. write it :P

Joe wrote: "Hi all,

Have any of the members ever tried their hands at writing? And if so did they have any success?

Thanks
Joe"

Well, I write a bit. I'm like you... It's mainly been poetry, but I've got some pet ideas for a book or two I'd like to get around to finish one of these days. I don't know that I'd exactly say I've had much actual success, but I managed to stumble my way into having 3 poems copyrighted and published (I'm convinced the company was a complete scam though).

I'll add my vote to those of the others though, Joe... Let's see some of your work! I know that it can be a very personal thing, and I understand if you don't want to share, but you seem to be at least a little interested in publishing, so what better place to show off a bit? :)

Right well on your head be it!


To the death of things

Scene 2 - Another death...ish

When he got home to his tiny flat in a quiet corner of Dublin he had no idea that anything had changed. Which is just as well really, him not being very good with change. But him not being very good with something and or not knowing about something, did nothing to reverse what had just happened.

I'm not sure how to put this, but there is only one way to say it. He had died. And not just "Oh my god I just died of fright" kinda died, he had been dead, proper dead. The only silver lining being it had only been for a very short time and he was back alive before anyone knew the difference.

A few moments ago he had a very close (or so he thought) run in with a truck. He was trying to cross the road at the same time a large heavy fast truck was trying to drive down it. No contest really. Killed instantly. End of story. Kaput...ish



The truck had screeched to a halt as soon at the driver came to and felt the impact of hard metal on soft person. He had been miles away inside his own head, wondering if it was wrong to give is truck a girl's name. Miraculously by that time the victim (if we may call him that) was back on his feet and repeating "Holy crap!, Holy crap!"

The driver was rigid in the cab of his truck, scared stiff I suppose, not sure of what the correct way to handle this would be. In lieu of any inspiration he decided to fall back on that old reliable. Shouting very loud.

"What the hell do you think you're doing" he roared, jumping from the cab, trying (and failing) to hide the panic in his voice. "Did you not see me eh, are you actually completely blind! I could have killed you!"

The truck driver was already suffering from the after effects of a large adrenalin dump. His hands were moving wildly and it felt like every drop of blood in his whole body was now living in his boots. He was constantly moving, as if he was trying to stay one step ahead of what he knew had happened. He had felt his truck, under his control hit a man shaped object, head on. No one walks away from that.

Unless he was wrong of course, unless somehow, at the last minute etc. etc. he had swerved and avoided the suicidal idiot. The fact that the suicidal idiot was now standing in front of him only cemented the conclusion.

"Holy crap!" repeated the young man who had died, kind of. "Holy crap Holy crap" he said again. He had seen nothing of the truck until it was too late. A few seconds ago he was trying to remember something, something which now was probably gone forever, and know here he was, in this new shiny reality, one in which yet again he had no control.

He was sure he had felt the pain of impact, the hollow feeling you get when you know, absolutely know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, you have completely and utterly made a balls of something very important indeed.

But for the second time that night a poor unfortunate brain was asked, without any prior warning to make sense of what had just happened. And this is what it came up with.






In this new version of events it was he who in the nick of time etc. etc. had leaped to safety, avoiding the gob shite driver by the slimmest of margins. With the reactions of a wild mountain lion (and why not, if you're going to re-invent you're self why not add a dash of cool) he had used his dormant animal instincts and sensed the truck before he had seen it. And with an unnatural speed he had reacted and saved the day. The only casualty was his shopping, which lay on the ground.

Eager to get away from the suicidal idiot, the twitching curtains brigade and the line of honking cars behind him the driver got back into his truck and drove away, still shouting and cursing, leaving the suicidal idiot to finish his "Holy Crap" monologue and to pick up his shopping, putting it back in the cotton string bag it had fallen out of.

With that done the young man continued on his way, through the narrow dark streets to his front door. which pretty much looks like any door in any street you've seen. Which is a shame really, shows a lack of imagination. Which he is definitely going to need.

Which is where I come in. My name is March, and I'm allot older than I look. Call it good genes if you will. There is nothing remarkable about me at all, I'm totally ordinary in every way, I do however have a very important job, very important indeed.

The work is hard, the hours are long and thankless but it's all I know. So here I am.

It's my job to keep an eye out for odd things. Things that can't be explained despite the best intentions of a poor stressed brain or two. I've been at it a long, long time and I like to think I know what I'm doing. Which is why I was right there to see the person I had under surveillance get a smack of a truck in the face, die, come back to life, get up and walk away.

This does not happen very often.

I was watching him because of his ancient family connections. In the dim and distant past his ancestors were hugely powerful. Their empire was as vast as any before or after. They ruled over their kingdom with compassion and kindness. No one in their vast lands knew poverty or fear.

But as with all empires eventually it died, nothing lasts forever in this world.


The sun rose and fell, time led the stories of the old kingdom straight into legend, and it is that legend that leads me here, the legend of an ancient family, some of whom became very hard to kill indeed, once protectors of the people, now....well now they walk in front of trucks without a clue about who they really are.

Knock Knock.....

Knock Knock....

It was only on the second knock that the young man who had the very (of so he thought) close shave only moments before heard the person at the door. He was slumped in his sofa running over what had happened in his head again and again. The instant replay stopping each time it got to the....he was afraid to go any further. moment of impact?

He moved towards the door, "Who is it?" he asked. "My names is Detective March" replied the person behind the door, "I saw what happened, between you and that truck driver, I was wondering if I could have a word?" The young man winced and mouthed a curse, he had been completely prepared to forget the whole thing and never mention it to anyone, but this stranger at the door had brought the whole incident slap bang into reality.

Slowly the young man opened he door, not sure if he wanted to or not. The young man took a second to look over the person who was stood there, he was older than his disembodied voice had suggested.

"Hello" opened March feeling that one of then should say something, "As I said my name is March and I was hoping I could have a word with you if that's OK? Can I come in?" Without waiting for a reply March gently brushed past the young man and was past the door frame in into the main room of the flat. It was a nice enough place, plenty of living had been done there over the years and had left a residual energy in the place. The walls had a few posters for predictable films, The shelves had an assortment of worthy books, Buddha's and plants. All pretty standard thought March, and a little disappointing.

He scanned the CD rack on the right hand wall and ran through a mental checklist of Cd's that can be expected to be found in the average collection of an young urban male. Early Dylan, check. Songs for the Tillerman, check. Assorted indie stuff, the radio friendly variety, check. He will have to do much better than this if he's to survive thought March.

The kitchen which was beyond the living room was tiny but it did the job well enough, there was a door on the left hand wall which lead to the bedroom and toilet.

"Nice place you have here...?" asked March. "Kyle" blurted the young man, still not sure how he now had a visitor in his flat. He had gone from outside to inside with out much of a fuss, that he should try and stop him hadn't occurred to him. "and I'm in grand really thanks and all" continued Kyle "nothing bruised but my shopping" he said pointing to the string bag on the kitchen table"

"Well that's kinda what I wanted to talk to you about Kyle" said March who having finished surveying the room was now standing facing him, "As I'm sure you have noticed in your limited time on this earth people don't get hit by dirty big trucks and walk way with nothing but a bruised plum or two, if you get my meaning."

"I think you must have the wrong idea....." Kyle began to say. "The truck missed me"

"No it didn't" corrected March. "The truck hit you right in the head, boom!" continued March, hitting his hand off his head to emphasise the point. "And your about to go into shock so you really should sit down" March who was already sitting in the single chair by the fire gestured to the sofa.

Taking his advice Kyle closed the door and sat on the ageing well loved sofa. His own sofa, is his own front room no less, so why he was taking orders from a stranger in his own flat confused him.

“Have you lived here long? asked March, opening his notepad and fishing a pen from his coat pocket

“Oh um no not too long, a few months I suppose”

“Do you like it? Whats the area like?”

“It’s ok I suppose, I keep myself to myself”

Kyle felt uneasy answering questions about himself, he always had done. His past, present and future were not his favorite topics of conversation.

“How old are you”

“16”

“If you don’t mind me asking what’s a 16 year old doing living on his own, Where are your parents”

“Dead thanks for asking” replied Kyle finding his voice, “Anymore more questions that are none of your business you wanna ask”

Kyle was please his voice hadn’t given out on him during his show of strength

"I wish I had more time to explain all this to you I really really do but the reality is I don't so you're going to have to pay very close attention to everything I say" began March who could already see the beginnings of terror on Kyle's face as he noticed his hands begin to shake.

"In a moment, or well now really you're going to begin to shake, now I know this will be frightening but this will pass in a few minuets" he continued "First your hands, then you're arms, then you're whole body, but like I said this will pass. After a little bit of this you will faint which I suppose is a blessing, I will then take you from here to a safe place, so when you wake up please remember that you are safe and with friends. Can you do that for me?

But March could tell the boy was beyond listening, his whole body was beginning to tremble and shake This was the most dangerous part. The awakening would either take hold or not. He would live or he would not. March felt the injustice visited on the boy and hated himself for being apart of it, he could see the boy’s humanity being stripped from him. If only there was another way he thought.

No sooner had that thought had its moment of center stage glory, Kyle stopped shaking and died. Again. Maybe for the last time today.

wow silence deadly!

If anyone needs me I'll be over in the corner trimming my wrists. (joke)

Relax! :P People will comment, I'm saving reading it till I get back from work and don't have phones and beeping things interrupting me every 5 seconds :) Thank you for posting it though, am looking forward to it!

ha cool.
I just popped back as it was slow in work no biggie.

okay. that took a while to read. sorry had a busy day today. but yes. first few paragraphs are a bit iffy for me to read but i think that's EVERY book ever until i get into it. so far i LOVE march. well interested in him. i think you may give a little bit too much info away all at once though when you're saying about why he's following yer man straight away. you could easily leave that till a little bit later, make us wait and want it. the end of it is excellent. well intrigued.

there's a few bits that i'd phrase differently but i'm sure you'd change them yourself as you go further with the story and read it over more and more. (: sure if you publish it they check everything anywho. ^_^

but yeah. liking march for definites.

Thanks for posting it Joe, first time I had a chance to read it since you stuck it up. Soooooo, tell me more. I like it dude, it's humorous, it's intriguing. I'd agree with Sophie about a couple of sentences here and there but that's not really any of my business since its your style or whatever. Also, I think we could do with a bit more of Kyle's thoughts after his "incident", before March arrives at his house (that ofc is assuming Kyle wakes up again and attains a significant roles in the story). And March's introduction is good but I don't know, I found it lacked something. I didn't really get interested when he first appeared, but once he gets to Kyle's, he's great. I'd love to find out what happens next though!!
I hope you don't mind my critique, I don't think you asked for feedback and I'm hardly in a position to criticise anyone's writing, but I'm just giving my thoughts.:)
Fair play and thanks again for posting for us.

no no by all means critic away. And thanks for taking the time to read it. For what it's worth I agree with all the points raised.

I'm hope you more replies soon, would be nice to hear other opinions I'm sure.
So what are your plans for it? Have you the story nearly finished or? Are you planning to submit it or just hang on to it?

It's not finished but I've most of it mapped out wt this stage.

When it's done I'd like to submit it and see what happens, although the ageing punk in me likes the idea of self publishing.

Thanks again for the feed back

Joe

Really enjoyed that Joe. Wasn't too sure where it was going for the first few paragraphs abut I was intrigued by the end of it.

I really like your ideas, there's obviously a big story to be told here, and a lot of backstory to go with it. I'd love to find out about the Old Kingdom and Kyles ancestors too.

Some of the sentences are a little awkward, especially near the beginning, but I'm sure that's something I'm sure you'd fix on a re-read.

I'm looking forward to reading more.

Ye the start is a bit clunky alright.

Intriguing. There are a few awkward patches, but you have a definite voice. That is, you don't sound like every other writer. That's a huge plus. Polishing individual sentences can happen later when you've finished the first draft. You should keep going with this. Do you have an idea of the length you're going for?

I did notice one thing that I suggest you think about. What point of view are you trying to write in? The general wisdom if you want to catch the eye of an editor/publisher is that you need to pick one, and you seem to be sliding back and forth between them here just a bit. Some well known authors do that, but it's going to make the job of convincing someone they want to publish it harder.

I like the first person viewpoint, but there are a couple of spots where your narrator seems to know more of what Kyle is thinking/feeling than he seems to have a right to. If he doesn't have some unusual talent that explains that, I recommend cleaning those spots up, so the reader doesn't mistake them for switching viewpoints into Kyle's in mid-chapter.

Joe wrote: "Hi all,

Have any of the members ever tried their hands at writing? And if so did they have any success?

Thanks
Joe"

I'd love to be a writer, but I just don't have the talent. And that's not false modesty or low self esteem, it's just the simple truth. I could write something, but it would just be mediocre stuff... like most novels out there.

Craig wrote: "I'd love to be a writer, but I just don't have the talent. And that's not false modesty or low self esteem, it's just the simple truth. I could write something, but it would just be mediocre stuff... like most novels out there."

I don't know mate...i thought your introduction was great! lol :)

It must have been the wine or the sleep deprivation.

Good luck with it Arielle. I hope it's a good journey for you.

May you find your Grail.

I started writing three years ago (after talking about doing it forever). I just finished and sold my fourth book to a small press e publisher. Read a few writing books, join a local writing club and then put your butt in the chair. You can do it!!

Had a novel published about 15 years ago, and then life got in the way. While I haven't written a novel since I have written copy for ads, brochures, business proposals, websites, all that dull stuff.

I've recently started writing my second novel, first draft anyway. hardest part is getting myself into a routine, making myself write and move the story on even if it's muck.

Hi Joe, yes I guess you could say I've tried writing. 12 novels completed so far. 4 are published as eBook on Kindle and paperbacks on Createspace so far, the rest will follow at - one every 6 weeks.
Success? That's difficult to judge. Sales are not great yet but I'm waiting until I get more published before going for the big sales push.
I've had good critical response and am pleased with that.
The West Cork Trilogy set in and around the town of Kinsale is going well and I've a deal with a book shop there and a possible national TV slot due in the summer, so things should take off then.
My advice to anyone thinking of doing this: yes write if you can. Yes consider Indi publishing but please, get a pro to edit for you. Too many rush stuff out and then get disappointed by the poor response. Proofing and pro editing is an absolute must and might be your only expense.
Regards to all. Davidrory