Happily Ever After Cafe discussion

What are some of the must-haves in a hero you feel are necessary for you to love him?

For me...
Fidelity
Honesty
Willing to listen to heroine
Supportive of heroine as long as it's not a TSTL issue
Tenderness/gentleness/protectiveness towards heroine

I'll add the same two qualities to your hero list that I did for the heroine: passion and a sense of humor. He should also be courageous and confident, but not in an obnoxious way. It may sound shallow, but I want my romance heroes to be handsome in a manly-man way. We're talking about romance after all. I think I gave all these characteristics to the hero in my novel and that's why I'm still in love with him

I love passion and humor. I love when there is a humorous element added into the story but it's not necessarily a must-have. It's more of a bonus. Of course, there are some stories where humor may not be appropriate. With the dark brooding tortured hero a sense of humor wouldn't work but maybe a humorous heroine would. lol Help lighten up the feller.

He can't be a woman hater who shows women no respect and thinks of women as objects to be used because he can. That's probably the one thing I can't stand in a hero.

Excellent point, Lady D! None of those, please. Though authors seemed to think this is appealing lately.

I like the heroes who are nice to their mamas. Willing to do something for them they would never do for anyone else.

I have noticed that. I find it a huge turnoff.

lol again some self reflection and yes faithfulness. I really hate man hos. I wish the genre would have less of them--the reformed man ho really is not that hot. It means (unless he had an issue with intimacy) at some point he thought it was okay to treat women like objects. Bleh. But its kinda like the virgin thing Lisa Kay was talking about in the old days... it is hard to avoid right now in what are otherwise good books. I don't really think it often adds to the plot though or character development unless there is a reason for it. I can name some great books where there was a reason for it though.

Just curious about how ya'll feel about man-whores who do it because they are spies/undercover to obtain information?


I guess I can understand it to a degree but it would still bother me. One example is Brock Lucas in Kristen Ashley's Dream Man series. Also there was a Hannah Howell's book, If He's Wild.

Hmmm. I really do plan to do housework today. But right now, my love is making the family breakfast after doing a pile of dishes so...

I don't mind if it was pre Heroine and he hated it lol.

Cat, do you find that in contemporaries? I see it more in historicals.

The undercover bit? or the Manho bit?

In historicals a Manho is a Rake


Brock Lucas in Kristen Ashley's Dream Man series, I would argue does the undercover thing and doesn't really like it.

I remember reading a historical that had the hero-rake, working undercover and part of that was spying-man-whoring on/ with a French spy. (Even in trying to explain this you can see I'm torn).

It was gut wrenching because he didn't believe his wife (a plain Jane he had had to marry) knew about his activities. She did. He was working, not really "enjoying" himself. Really says a lot about how much the male of our species can separate sex from love. I kept thinking, there had to be another way to get the information. It just didn't feel honourable....

That's cheating in my books. Big no-no for me.

I know that book and it made me crazy. I hate that. I loved the heroine too.

I love a hero with a flaw or a dark past. I get bored if he's too perfect.

C.C.--I totally get what you mean. I used to think I wanted my heroes to be perfect, but as I've read more Romance novels, I find myself liking the men with flaws better--they have more depth and are way more interesting. But I don't want it to be anything too dark or unforgivable. Just something that makes him seem human.

I still prefer a level of perfection in my heroes. Maybe not completely perfect but nearly there. I don't care for heroes with major issues like alcoholism or suicidal or something along those lines. I don't mind scars or disabilities or that sort of thing, though.

Like Lou said flawed characters have more depth also, there is a space for their growth. Whether hero or heroine a characters that has shown growth through out the story is a big plus plus :)

I second all that has been said. I really like my heroes to have some flaws/quirk to them. Makes them more interesting, I mean perfect can be boring right? I also love them to have a sense of humor, wit and charm. I'm a sucker for men who are charming and confident to the point where they're walking the fine line of confidence and arrogance. Also, like the male to have a strong sense of justice and loyalty. As for physical appearance, I've always been drawn to those males that aren't considered handsome in a traditional sense. He's probably not what many women would consider good-looking, but there's just something about him that draws you in.

Never been too fond of the pretty boy look. Definitely lean more to the rugged look.

I second that Pamela! I don't need to have the guy spending more time in front of a mirror than me (although I don't spend that much time in the first place lol).

Or be prettier than my girl-friends. LOL!

lol ☺

A dimple, slightly crooked teeth, tousled hair, old worn boots... *sigh*

sounds yummy!

Yup.

Well, these aren't really must-haves.....these things just make me more inclined towards the hero-

- protective, to be able to save the girl from any danger
- selfless, should be ready to do anything for the girl.
- should be mysterious, kind, gentle but sexy at the same time.

great list, Ruchi! Love those protective ones1

Ditto!

Thanks Pamela and Lisa!!:)

Passion, loyalty, fidelity, protective, sexy in some way, a little sensitive or vulnerable melts my heart.

Great list, BJ

I love an emotionally damaged bad boy with a heart of gold. I like getting some backstory to let me know why he's "bad" and then I love to see him brought to his knees by a kick*ss heroine who refuses to succumb right away to his charms. Even better if she's carrying emotional baggage too. I want my heroes a bit flawed, vulnerable, "bad" but with a good heart that the reader sees, sexy, alpha in a "protective" kind of way, and loyal.

Yummy, Sandra!

Bitten Jewels wrote: "Passion, loyalty, fidelity, protective, sexy in some way, a little sensitive or vulnerable melts my heart."

That is exactly my favourite type of hero, although he should also have a good sense of humour and only a 'little' vulnerable cause too much vulnerability would make him seem weak.

Pamela(AllHoney) wrote: "Great list, BJ"

Why thank you. PS--did you know Brodick came to visit me last night?

@ Ipshita, sense of humor is always great too :D

Now BJ, I do hope you're not talking about MY Brodick! lol

LOL the same ;) If you are angry with him, I'm quite willing to take him off your hands.

No, that's ok. He's fine with me!

Are you sure???? Because I really need a HEA.

there are plenty of great and awesome heroes out there to choose from. You don't need mine! lol