Jim Epp

“A gentleman is someone who knows how to play the banjo and doesn't.”
― Mark Twain

“I’m supposed to figure out if the glass is half full or half empty,” I told her.

Without a moment’s hesitation, in a split second, my grandmother shrugged and said: “It depends on if you’re drinking or pouring.”
― Bill Cosby

“The average IQ in America is—and this can be proven mathematically—average.”
― P.J. O'Rourke

“It's easier to fool people than to convince them that they have been fooled.”
― Mark Twain