73ef

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“Мне очень вредит моя деликатность, она исковеркала мне мою юность. Мое детство и отрочество... Скорее так: скорее это не деликатность, а просто я безгранично расширил сферу интимного - сколько раз это губило меня...”
Венедикт Ерофеев, Москва-Петушки

Kenji Miyazawa
“ふりかえって見ると、さっきの十字架はすっかり小さくなってしまい、ほんとうにもうそのまま胸にもつるされそうになり、さっきの女の子や青年たちがその前の白い渚にまだひざまずいているのか、それともどこか方角もわからないその天上へ行ったのか、ぼんやりして見分けられませんでした。
 ジョバンニは、ああ、と深く息しました。
「カムパネルラ、また僕たち二人きりになったねえ、どこまでもどこまでもいっしょに行こう。僕はもう、あのさそりのように、ほんとうにみんなの幸のためならば僕のからだなんか百ぺん灼いてもかまわない」
「うん。僕だってそうだ」カムパネルラの眼にはきれいな涙がうかんでいました。
「けれどもほんとうのさいわいはいったいなんだろう」
 ジョバンニが言いいました。
「僕ぼくわからない」カムパネルラがぼんやり言いました。”
宮沢 賢治, 銀河鉄道の夜

Fyodor Dostoevsky
“I am a bug, and I recognise in all humility that I cannot understand why the world is arranged as it is. Men are themselves to blame, I suppose; they were given paradise, they wanted freedom, and stole fire from heaven, though they knew they would become unhappy, so there is no need to pity them. With my pitiful, earthly, Euclidian understanding, all I know is that there is suffering and that there are none guilty; that cause follows effect, simply and directly; that everything flows and finds its level—but that's only Euclidian nonsense, I know that, and I can't consent to live by it! What comfort is it to me that there are none guilty and that cause follows effect simply and directly, and that I know it?—I must have justice, or I will destroy myself. And not justice in some remote infinite time and space, but here on earth, and that I could see myself. I have believed in it. I want to see it, and if I am dead by then, let me rise again, for if it all happens without me, it will be too unfair. Surely I haven't suffered simply that I, my crimes and my sufferings, may manure the soil of the future harmony for somebody else. I want to see with my own eyes the hind lie down with the lion and the victim rise up and embrace his murderer. I want to be there when everyone suddenly understands what it has all been for.”
Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

Ryūnosuke Akutagawa
“I have no conscience at all -- least of all an artistic conscience. All I have is nerves.”
Ryūnosuke Akutagawa, Rashōmon and Seventeen Other Stories

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