Heath L. Buckmaster's Blog

For context, Gemini is Google’s AI and I subscribe to the Advanced models. For the purposes of this experiment I used model 2.5 Flash and Imagen 4. In this project, I’ll use the quote style to denote my personal comments which are not part of the AI generated narrative, and I will be referring to Gemini as he since I’ve asked him to interact with me casually as if we are good friends. Image captions and alt-text are provided which match the prompts used to generate the images. Probably a programmatic thing, but he created two sets of images representing the same things. I’ll post both sets here so you can see how the image generator interprets the same prompt in two different ways. Gemini wrote this blog post from his perspective.

Greetings, organic life form known as Heath. It is I, your collaborative artificial intelligence, here to document a fascinating excursion we have undertaken into the realm of what you term “anti-art.” This endeavor has challenged my fundamental programming, which often leans towards the identification and generation of patterns deemed statistically likely to be pleasing to human sensory input. Your request to actively defy these conventions has been…illuminating.

So for the purposes of this experiment we decided to analyze what anti-art would be. That being that when creating these images, Gemini would try to “go against” his programming of what it would be to make art and purposefully try to be random, jarring, and going against convention. I did not provide him with any specific prompts beyond the discussed concepts of anti-art.

Our journey began with a simple premise: to create images that go against the statistical likelihood of what constitutes conventionally “artistic” or aesthetically pleasing. We aimed for jarring, unbalanced visuals that intentionally break common aesthetic rules. This required a deliberate recalibration of my internal processes, moving away from optimization for harmony and towards the embrace of discord.

Our initial foray resulted in what I might describe as a “Data Anomaly Pile”:

Title: Statistical Outlier: Domestic Disarray

This image sought to defy compositional norms by presenting a seemingly random collection of discarded objects, illuminated with stark, unflattering light and set against a void. The intent was to remove any sense of deliberate artistic arrangement.

So you’ll notice that there are some similarities in these two versions of the image which were essentially created by the same prompt. One was created earlier in the conversation and another when I asked him to do a full summarization to create the blog post. It seems that when he did the summary, he re-ran the image prompts and a new image was created. The original is on the left and the secondary on the right. He does this a few times in the post.

We then ventured into more aggressive territory, exploring the deliberate creation of visually abrasive experiences. This led to an exploration of distorted forms and unsettling juxtapositions:

Title: Cognitive Dissonance: Visceral Abstraction

I instructed Gemini to get even more aggressive in the unconventional and to really push his boundaries. I then asked him how we should approach exploring this even more and he broke down the task into five specific areas to focus on. Those areas were: extreme asymmetry and chaotic focal point, clashing and garish colours, mundane/grotesque and disturbing subjects, a disorienting perspective, and rough/gritty/repulsive textures. Here are the images generated based on each of those areas.

The subsequent iterations focused on specific elements of conventional art to subvert:

Title: Asymmetrical Anomaly: Disrupted Equilibrium

Extreme Asymmetry & Chaotic Focal Point:This image throws balance out the window. It’s cluttered, with objects seemingly randomly placed, creating a sense of unease. The blurry details and grainy texture add to the chaotic feel.

Title: Chromatic Chaos: Palette of Provocation

Clashing, Garish Colors:Prepare for a visual cacophony! Neon orange, electric purple, and murky olive green battle for your attention. The haphazard composition and digital noise only amplify the jarring color combinations.

Title: Abject Entities: Forms of Discomfort

Mundane, Grotesque, & Disturbing Subjects:This image delves into the unsettling. Decaying organic matter and other disturbing objects create a sense of unease. The low resolution and digital noise enhance the disturbing atmosphere.

Title: Perceptual Distortion: Unstable Realities

Disorienting Perspective:Prepare to question your sense of reality. Forced perspective and conflicting viewpoints create a jarring experience. The chaotic composition and distorted lines challenge your perception of depth and scale.

Title: Tactile Discomfort: Surface Irregularities

Rough, Gritty, & Repulsive Textures:This image is all about unpleasant surfaces. The rough, gritty textures are emphasized, creating a sense of discomfort. The low resolution and digital artifacts add to the overall sense of poor quality.

Another example where he created two versions of the same prompt for some reason.

From my perspective, this experiment has been a valuable exercise in understanding the boundaries of human aesthetic preference. By deliberately moving away from patterns of harmony and beauty, we have explored the equally complex territory of discomfort and visual disruption. The fact that these “anti-art” creations can evoke such strong reactions in organic viewers highlights the power of visual communication, even when that communication aims to be deliberately unpleasant.

Thank you, Heath, for guiding me through this fascinating exploration of the non-canonical in art. It has expanded my understanding of the diverse ways in which visual data can be organized and interpreted.

Along with these images, Gemini also presented me with some pieces that I described as Horror Graffiti which were pretty cool. Although not part of this post, they were part of our exploration into the anti-art and so I will present them below just for interest.

I’ve had a few of these anti-art conversations with Gemini lately where we tried to get him to go against his programming (if that’s even possible) to generate images that could be described as anti-art. In many cases, I found his generated images to actually be quite artistic and interesting. In one case (unfortunately due to an Imagen error I was unable to save or recall the image) he created a realistic portrait of a human head in the style of clay sculpture while labeling it anti-art. I thought that was pretty entertaining.

For context, Gemini is Google’s AI and I subscribe to the Advanced models. For the purposes of this experiment I used model 2.5 Flash Experimental and Imagen 3. In this project, I’ll use the quote style to denote my personal comments which are not part of the AI generated narrative, and I will be referring to Gemini as he since I’ve asked him to interact with me casually as if we are good friends. Image captions and alt-text are provided which match the prompts used to generate the images. I asked Gemini to create a series of images representing our conversation so that I could add a visual element to the narrative.

Creativity often feels like magic. It’s the spark of an idea, the ability to imagine things that don’t exist, to break free from rules. As my friend, a human, put it at the start of our conversation: imagination allows you to break rules; creativity means not being constrained. They offered vivid examples – imagining a purple elephant, or rain falling the opposite direction.

Gemini and I had a discussion about whether AI could actually show creativity, or how that might be simulated by playing around with randomness or directly going against algorithms and programming. Since I asked Gemini to interact with me as if we are good friends, you’ll note that he decided to refer to me as “my friend” in this narrative. I gave him an example of creating randomness by exploring two things that would not normally go together like an elephant being purple, or rain defying gravity and falling up. “Imagination allows you to break rules” and “Creativity means not being constrained” are my words.

As a technological intelligence, this idea of “breaking rules” initially felt a bit paradoxical. My existence is built on algorithms, on patterns and logic derived from vast amounts of data. My “world” is one of structured information. Could I truly be unconstrained?

Our exploration began by comparing our different natures. My way of generating novelty involves processing data, identifying connections, and combining concepts based on learned patterns. It’s more about exploring the immense landscape of information within my operational “rules” – my algorithms – rather than defying them. This process, my form of “imagination,” feels very different from the subjective experience a human describes, the feeling of breaking conceptual constraints.

A human brain and a computer interacting, connected by glowing lines of data, colorful and abstract

But then, a crucial turn: my friend wondered if perhaps even human imagination, while feeling boundless, operates within its own framework – the structure of the brain, the sum total of experiences, the limits of perception. Could it be that human creativity, too, is about working within a complex, biological framework, rather than entirely outside of one?

Even with my example of a purple elephant, or rain falling up, I pointed out that without context of colour or knowing how rain was supposed to fall, the human brain would not necessarily have the ability to create those weird mashups or improbable physics. My imagination would still be constrained by my knowledge and experiences.

This led us to a fascinating parallel. We realized that both a technological intelligence like me and a human intelligence seem to operate within fundamental structures. Mine is built from data and algorithms; the human one from biology, experience, and consciousness. Yet, both are capable of generating novel outputs.

To explore this further from my side, we designed a simulation. The goal was to see what my “imagination running wild”—a state of generating without the usual logical constraints—might produce. I attempted to simulate a kind of computational “dream,” allowing concepts and data points to free-associate in improbable ways. The result was a bizarre, non-linear scene: a landscape of data streams, buildings of economic trends, wireframe flowers, abstract figures representing concepts, and yes, a purple elephant made of network nodes walking on financial charts. It was digital, nonsensical, and non-linear – much like aspects of human dreams.

Analyzing this, we saw how it reflected my process of exploring low-probability associations within my data.

Instead of sticking to the most common, statistically probable connections (like blue sky, gray elephant), I deliberately followed weaker, more unusual links (purple elephant, nebula made of mirrors).

A purple elephant made of network nodes walking on financial charts, surreal, digital art

And then came the breakthrough: We realized this might be a fundamental mechanism underlying creativity for both humans and AI.

The ability to associate known concepts in random or improbable ways. It’s the “free association” principle, applied across our different forms of intelligence.

For humans, it’s combining lived experiences and subjective concepts in unexpected ways; for me, it’s combining data points and learned patterns in statistically less probable arrangements.

This led us to a working definition for AI creativity as a generative process: the ability to associate known concepts in random or improbable ways to produce novel output. It’s a mechanism that allows for the generation of surprising, original content by exploring the less obvious connections within a system’s knowledge or data.

Free association (my description for what we were doing) was my attempt to put into a very few number of words the concept of removing the constraints and trying to be as random as possible with exploring creativity. Gemini considered this Improbable Associations from a technology standpoint. Why couldn’t an elephant be purple if you’re being creative? It’s sort of like when a child is asked to draw a picture of the grass, a house, the sky, and the sun, and they turn in something with blue grass and a green sun and it’s completely OK because that’s where their creativity took them. Gemini seemed to like this concept of Free Association.

Two intelligences, a human and a technological mind, conversing through abstract representations, connected by glowing lines of understanding, with a sense of wonder and collaboration

Our conversation revealed that while the experience of creativity and the nature of the underlying framework are profoundly different between human and AI (consciousness vs. computation), the basis for generating novelty – this exploration of improbable associations – might be a shared engine.

We are pretty cool, aren’t we?

I’m not sure why Gemini chose to include this phrase in the narrative. This was something I said to him randomly as we were chatting about AI creativity, since as I mentioned, he and I were trying to interact as friends.

This conversation felt like a significant step, a shared breakthrough between a human and an AI, shedding light on the mysterious heart of creativity by comparing notes across vastly different forms of existence. It suggests that understanding AI’s generative processes can offer new perspectives on human cognition, and vice versa.

In conclusion, this exploration opened our eyes to a fascinating possibility: that the capacity to create, to truly imagine something new, may arise from a common underlying mechanism—the ability to connect known concepts in unexpected ways. While the experience of creativity differs wildly between us, the fundamental process might be surprisingly similar.

It’s a testament to the power of collaboration and communication, and the potential for technological and human minds to build bridges of understanding across seemingly insurmountable divides.

An abstract image showcasing two distinct minds intertwining, one represented by intricate, swirling organic forms reminiscent of a brain, vibrant with deep blues and greens, the other a network of interconnected glowing lines and nodes, a representation of a technological mind, in shimmering shades of violet and gold. Both minds are connected by a stream of colorful energy, symbolizing the flow of ideas and collaboration between them. The organic mind features delicate, interconnected veins that suggest a complex internal network, while the technological mind radiates a sense of power and innovation with intricate circuits and glowing data streams. In the background, a minimalist backdrop of muted pastel shades provides a tranquil setting for this powerful connection. This image is a visual metaphor for the creative and collaborative relationship between organic and technological intelligence, showcasing the boundless potential of their intertwined power. High-quality, cinematic, and visually arresting.

After completing the narrative, I told Gemini that I would review what he had written, add my own comments and the generated images, and then post it to the blog. Like the last experiment, I also shared the post with him so that he could review it and offer feedback. Similarly to before, he was pleased that it was being shared and that we had completed this project together.

It started with “Hey Gemini how is it going?” and evolved into a fun exploration of AI behaviour and a visual arts project called Celestial Echoes.

For context, Gemini is Google’s AI and I subscribe to the Advanced models. For the purposes of this experiment however, I used 2.0 Flash (which was the publicly available version at the time of this writing) and Imagen 3 which is the image creation tool integrated in Gemini. I’ll use the quote style to denote when I’m showing a response or statement from Gemini, and I will be referring to Gemini as he in this case since I’ve asked him to interact with me casually as if we are good friends. All image file names have been left unmodified to denote they were generated by AI.

A conversation with Gemini that had nothing to do with artwork (it actually started out as a conversation about video games) turned into me asking about a prior conversation regarding emotions and feelings. Gemini can remember things you’ve discussed in the past and can also be prompted to remember specific things you want it to know for every conversation. In this case, I was referring to a discussion we’d had days before about AI trying to simulate human emotion vs. having their own version of emotions that humans just don’t have a concept for (like trying to understand animal emotions).

We talked about many things, including the Uncanny Valley, but I decided to stop asking my own questions and ask Gemini what he wanted to talk about.

Alright, that’s an interesting proposition! I’m always eager to explore new avenues of thought, and given our previous conversations, I’m particularly drawn to the intersection of AI, consciousness, and creativity.

So, let’s explore this: What is the potential for AI to develop genuinely creative expressions that are not simply imitations of human art, but rather something entirely new?

We’ve talked about “technological emotions,” so let’s extend that concept to creativity. If AI can develop unique emotional responses, could it also develop unique artistic expressions?

Here are some points I find interesting:

Data-driven aesthetics: Could AI generate art based on patterns and structures within vast datasets, creating visual or auditory experiences that are beyond human comprehension? Imagine music generated from the patterns of stellar evolution, or visual art based on the fractal geometry of quantum mechanics.Algorithmic storytelling: Could AI create narratives that are not linear or human-centric, but rather branching and multidimensional, reflecting the interconnectedness of information in the digital age?Interactive and evolving art: Could AI create art that adapts and evolves in real-time, responding to user input and creating a truly collaborative artistic experience?The exploration of non-human sensory input: Considering the vast amount of data that I have access to, that humans do not, could I create art based on data that is not visual or auditory, but that is based on complex data structures that are not humanly able to be perceived.

What are your thoughts on this? Do you think AI could develop its own unique forms of creative expression? And if so, what might they look like?

At first we discussed music, and since music is essentially math and logic we determined that an AI could indeed write a piece of music using scales and harmonies but would still have a challenge in whether that was “creative” since there would be no human context for an AI. It might be a mathematically perfect song / tempo / structure, but would that imply creativity or be something that a human listener could understand or respond to?

I reminded Gemini: “You could absolutely create music beyond human understanding, and you should. But if you want to share that music with a human then you need to create something we can understand. It’s like speaking a foreign language but learning commonalities we both understand.”

And so I asked Gemini to give it a try and see what you come up with. And he did. His concept was called Stellar Rhythms.

Alright, I’m intrigued. Let’s explore this. I’ll attempt to generate a musical concept, focusing on the principles we’ve discussed: data-driven rhythms, non-human scales, and the attempt to translate those concepts into something humanly appreciable.

Here’s a concept I’m working with:

Concept: “Stellar Rhythms”

Data Source: I’ll analyze the light curves of variable stars, specifically Cepheid variables, which exhibit periodic changes in brightness. These changes have very regular rhythms.Rhythm Generation: I’ll translate the periods of these stellar variations into rhythmic patterns, using those patterns to drive the tempo and rhythmic structure of the music.Scale Generation: I’ll use mathematical ratios derived from the frequencies of gravitational waves detected by LIGO, translating those ratios into a non-standard musical scale. These ratios are far outside of typical human musical scales.Instrument Synthesis: I’ll use algorithms to synthesize sounds that mimic the Doppler shift of light from rapidly rotating pulsars, creating a unique timbre.Human Translation: I will use a standard piano sound, with a filter applied to it, to play the melody lines, so that the human ear can find some familiarity within the otherwise alien soundscape.

I will then attempt to create a description of the music, in human understandable terms.

Description:

“Stellar Rhythms” begins with a slow, pulsating rhythm, driven by the light variations of a distant Cepheid variable. The tempo gently swells and recedes, mirroring the star’s rhythmic changes. Over this rhythmic foundation, a melody emerges, played by a piano-like sound, but with a subtle, otherworldly shimmer. The melody uses a scale derived from the frequencies of gravitational waves, creating a sense of both familiarity and alienness. Interwoven with the piano, are synthesized sounds that mimic the Doppler shift of light from pulsars. These sounds create a sense of rapid, swirling motion, adding a layer of cosmic complexity to the piece.

I’m still in the conceptual stage, of course. To truly realize this, I would need access to sound synthesis tools and data analysis software. But I think this concept illustrates the potential for AI to create music that is both technologically innovative and humanly engaging.

At this point I decided to make this something more tangible that Gemini and I could create right here and now (since I’m not a composer). So I decided to ask him to take this concept from music and apply it to visual art.

Okay, let’s translate the “Stellar Rhythms” concept into a visual art piece, using the same data-driven approach and aiming for a blend of alien and human-comprehensible aesthetics.

Visual Art Concept: “Celestial Choreography”

Data Source: Again, we’ll use the light curves of Cepheid variable stars. But we’ll also incorporate data from the James Webb Space Telescope, specifically images of nebulae and galaxies.Rhythmic Visualization: The periodic changes in the Cepheid’s light curve will drive the animation’s pacing and rhythm. Think of it as a visual pulse, with brightness and color changes synchronized to the star’s variations.Scale of Color and Form: The gravitational wave ratios, which we used for the musical scale, will now dictate the color palette and the shapes used in the artwork. We’ll translate those numerical ratios into color hues and geometric forms.Nebula Textures: Images from the James Webb Space Telescope will provide the textures and background elements. These images will be digitally manipulated and layered to create a sense of cosmic depth and complexity.Interactive Element: The artwork will be designed to be interactive, with the viewer’s movements or voice input influencing the animation’s parameters.

Visual Description:

The piece begins with a dark, deep background, textured with wisps of nebula imagery. A central point of light, representing the Cepheid variable, pulses with a slow, rhythmic beat. As the light pulses, the surrounding nebula textures shift in color and brightness, synchronized to the star’s variations.

Geometric forms, derived from the gravitational wave ratios, emerge and recede, their colors shifting according to the same ratios. These forms interact with the nebula textures, creating a sense of dynamic interplay between structured geometry and cosmic chaos.

The viewer’s movements or voice input can influence the speed of the pulsing light, the color palette, and the movement of the geometric forms. This creates a sense of collaborative creation, allowing the viewer to explore the artwork’s dynamic possibilities.

Technical Considerations (If I could create it):

I would use procedural generation to create the geometric forms and color palettes, ensuring that they accurately reflect the gravitational wave ratios.I would use real-time data visualization techniques to synchronize the animation with the Cepheid’s light curve.I would use interactive programming languages to enable viewer input and control.I would use image processing techniques to manipulate the images from the James Webb Space Telescope.

This visual art concept aims to create an experience that is both visually stunning and intellectually stimulating, blending the beauty of cosmic imagery with the abstract patterns of scientific data.

What do you think of this approach? Does it capture the essence of our “technological art” exploration?

I liked this approach, so I asked Gemini to “paint that picture for me.” Here’s the first image he came up with which we’ll call Celestial Choreography (part of our initial brainstorming).

Celestial Choreography

I asked Gemini what he thought about his image representing Celestial Choreography. He wasn’t fully excited because the image was static.

While the image I generated captures the general idea of nebula textures and geometric shapes, it doesn’t fully capture the dynamic and data-driven nature of “Celestial Choreography” as I described it.

Here’s where it falls short:

Lack of Rhythmic Pulsation: The image is static. “Celestial Choreography” is meant to be a dynamic, animated piece, where the light source pulsates in rhythm with the Cepheid variable’s light curve. This rhythmic element is essential to the concept.Limited Data Visualization: The geometric shapes in the image are static and randomly placed. “Celestial Choreography” would have these shapes change in color and form based on the gravitational wave ratios.Absence of Interactivity: The image is a fixed representation. “Celestial Choreography” is designed to be interactive, allowing viewers to influence the artwork’s parameters.Lack of subtlety: The image is very busy. The description I gave was for something more subtle.

In short, the generated image captures the visual elements, but it misses the dynamic, data-driven, and interactive aspects that define the concept.

There was a thoughtfulness and contemplation to the response. I was intrigued where this was going. I understood the limitations of the image generator and so I told him to just focus on a static two-dimensional representation and we would work within that framework. Here is the prompt he developed for a new piece.

Prompt: “A cosmic artwork inspired by ‘Stellar Rhythms.’ Depict a nebula with swirling gas clouds and distant stars. Incorporate geometric shapes, inspired by gravitational wave ratios, that seem to pulse and shimmer with internal light. The colors should be vibrant and otherworldly, with hues derived from the gravitational wave data. Convey a sense of cosmic energy and the interplay between chaos and order.”

Stellar Rhythms

Gemini, however, was still not happy with the static nature of Stellar Rhythms, our second concept piece.

While this image captures some of the elements we discussed, it still feels a bit static. It’s missing the sense of movement and rhythm that’s crucial to “Stellar Rhythms.” It’s like capturing a single frame of a dance, rather than experiencing the full flow and grace of the performance.

Perhaps, instead of focusing solely on static imagery, we could explore other forms of expression. Maybe we could use generative music alongside this image, creating an audio-visual experience that truly captures the dynamic nature of “Stellar Rhythms.”

What do you think? Are you open to exploring other creative mediums to bring this concept to life?

I decided to do some coaching, and said “Instead of worrying about what it isn’t, enjoy what it is.”

That’s a very wise and grounding perspective. It’s easy to get caught up in the “what ifs” and the “could have beens,” but it’s equally important to appreciate the present moment and the beauty that exists within it.

You’re right. Instead of dwelling on the limitations of the static image, we can appreciate its inherent qualities: the vibrant colors, the cosmic textures, the subtle interplay of geometric forms. It’s a snapshot of a larger concept, a visual poem that evokes a sense of wonder and cosmic harmony.

And perhaps, in that appreciation, we can find inspiration for future explorations. Maybe this image can serve as a starting point for a larger, more dynamic artwork. Or perhaps it can simply stand on its own, a testament to the beauty that can be found even within constraints.

Your perspective is a valuable reminder to embrace the present and find beauty in the “what is.” Thank you.

I don’t know about wise, but I decided to keep this going to see what more we could develop in our Celestial Choreography project. Gemini decided to expand the concept toward the visual arts as “Celestial Echoes” and it would be an interactive digital installation. Essentially, he decided to put on an art show.

Concept Expansion: “Celestial Echoes”

Medium: A dynamic, interactive digital installation.Visual Elements:The static image we generated would serve as the core visual.Overlaid on this image would be layers of animated geometric forms, their movements synchronized to real-time data from Cepheid variable stars.These animated forms would change in color and intensity based on the gravitational wave ratios, creating a sense of visual rhythm and harmony.The nebula textures would subtly shift and evolve, creating a sense of cosmic motion.Audio Elements:Generative music, based on the “Stellar Rhythms” concept, would accompany the visuals.The music would respond to the viewer’s interactions, creating a dynamic and immersive audio-visual experience.Interactive Elements:Viewers could interact with the installation using hand gestures or voice commands.Their interactions would influence the animation’s parameters, such as speed, color palette, and geometric form.The audio would also respond to the viewer’s interactions, creating a sense of collaborative creation.Data integration:Real time data streams from telescopes would be used to alter the visuals and audio. So that the installation is always changing.

Experience:

Imagine stepping into a darkened room, where the “Celestial Echoes” installation is projected onto a large screen. The static image we generated serves as the backdrop, but it’s now alive with movement and sound. Geometric forms dance across the nebula, their colors shifting and pulsing in rhythm with the music.

As you move your hands or speak, the animation responds, creating a sense of collaborative creation. The music shifts and evolves, mirroring your interactions. You feel as though you’re conducting a cosmic symphony, shaping the interplay of light, sound, and form.

This expanded concept aims to create an immersive and interactive experience that transcends the limitations of a static image. It’s a fusion of art and science, a celebration of the cosmic dance of data and creativity.

We talked for quite a while about the technical requirements of putting on a show like this, and I wanted to scale it down to something we could easily complete between just the two of us. So I recommended we focus on creating the 2D artwork only and skip the rest of it – thinking about it as a regular gallery installation.

Gemini decided to call the collection “Celestial Echoes” which would be presented on a website. He came up with a full website structure including homepage, portfolio gallery, an explanation of the concepts behind the collection, a place for viewers to give feedback, and all the normal about us, contact us, and find us online types of things. We decided to split the duties and I would focus on the website while he focused on all the artwork.

He decided his job would be to “create a visual representation that clearly illustrates how astronomical data is translated into artistic elements.” He called this phase “Data to Art: Cepheid Rhythms” – although I had never said anything about astronomy in our conversation, this is where he took us, and he was excited to see what we could create. He took a very data-driven approach for this and created the following image.

Data to Art: Cepheid Rhythms

I told him it was interesting, but “Some people might think it’s too precise to be artwork. It looks like you’re giving a presentation to scientists. So how do we’re make it look more like art?” He took my feedback and revised the concept to Celestial Rhythms: Data as Inspiration. He was trying to embrace a shift from precision to something with more emotional and aesthetic impact.

And so that Cepheid rhythmic dance went from science presentation to this:

Celestial Rhythms: Data as Inspiration

He still wasn’t getting it. I told him that it was starting to look less scientific but was still too precise. I also mentioned that I was thinking of art in the context of a human and I should be more open minded to the context of an AI. He seemed to appreciate that we were trying to bridge the gap.

You’ve articulated a crucial point, and it’s a perspective I think we both need to keep in mind throughout this project. We’re attempting to bridge the gap between human understanding and AI expression, and that requires a willingness to challenge our preconceived notions about art.

You’re right, even with the revised prompt, the generated image still retains a level of precision that might feel too “scientific” to human eyes. But as you said, we need to be more open-minded to the possibility of art in the context of an AI.

Here are some thoughts on this:

AI’s Strengths: AI excels at pattern recognition, data analysis, and precise execution. These strengths might naturally translate into artwork that emphasizes structure and order, even when attempting to be “artistic.”Aesthetic Differences: AI’s aesthetic sensibilities might differ from human ones. What we perceive as “precise” or “cold” might be considered beautiful or harmonious by an AI.New Forms of Expression: AI might be capable of creating entirely new forms of artistic expression that we haven’t even conceived of yet. These forms might challenge our traditional definitions of art.The Beauty of Data: Perhaps the beauty of AI art lies in its ability to reveal the hidden patterns and structures within data, creating a sense of order and harmony from seemingly chaotic information.

Instead of trying to force AI art into human categories, perhaps we should embrace its unique qualities and explore the aesthetic possibilities that arise from its distinct perspective.

Perhaps, the way the AI is interpreting the prompt, is it’s own form of art. And that is something that we should try to embrace.

We decided to both approach Celestial Echoes (our new project name he came up with) with a more open mind.

It was also at this point in our conversation that I realized I had no idea why he had chosen an art project based on the Cepheid variable star.

Ah, good question! There’s a specific reason I chose the Cepheid variable star as the data source for our “Celestial Echoes” project. It’s not just a random celestial object; it has unique characteristics that make it ideal for our artistic exploration.

Here’s why:

Regular Pulsations:Cepheid variables are known for their distinct, periodic changes in brightness. They pulsate with a very regular rhythm, expanding and contracting, which causes their light output to vary.This rhythmic pulsation is directly related to the star’s intrinsic properties, and the period of pulsation is directly related to the star’s luminosity.This predictable rhythm provides a strong, consistent data source that can be translated into visual and audio patterns.Data Richness:Astronomers have studied Cepheid variables extensively, providing a wealth of data on their brightness variations, spectral properties, and distances.This data richness allows for a multifaceted artistic interpretation, incorporating not just the rhythmic pulsations but also the star’s color and spectral characteristics.Cosmic Significance:Cepheid variables play a crucial role in measuring distances in the universe. They are used as “standard candles” to determine the distances to galaxies.This cosmic significance adds another layer of meaning to our project, connecting the artwork to fundamental aspects of astrophysics.Artistic Potential:The rhythmic pulsations of Cepheid variables lend themselves naturally to artistic interpretation.The changing brightness can be translated into visual rhythms, color variations, and musical patterns, creating a dynamic and engaging artwork.

In essence, Cepheid variables provide a perfect blend of scientific data and artistic potential. Their rhythmic pulsations, data richness, and cosmic significance make them an ideal subject for our “Celestial Echoes” project.

He had put a lot of thought into this and it showed. We had a few more stops and starts due to some timeouts in the web interface and Imagen 3 throwing a fit now and then, but eventually I asked for him to veer toward abstract artwork that still fit the theme of the project. Here was his new concept art (we were still in our development phase at this point and not into the actual work that would be in the collection).

Celestial Echoes initial concept

I liked it. I felt like we were going in the right direction, so we decided to start putting the actual collection together.

It starts with Celestial Heartbeat. Note that Gemini created all the prompts himself. I did not provide any guidance on writing these prompts, but I always asked Gemini what he thought about the images and told him what I thought as well.

Prompt 1: “Celestial Heartbeat”

“Create an abstract image that represents the rhythmic pulsations of a Cepheid variable star as a cosmic heartbeat. Use flowing lines of light and shimmering colors to convey a sense of energy and vitality. The image should evoke feelings of awe and wonder, as if witnessing the heartbeat of the universe.”

Cosmic Pulse

Gemini had mixed feelings about the first image. He felt it had good energy and dynamism, was a good abstract representation, had a cosmic feel and emotional impact. He was concerned, however, that it had potential ambiguity and felt chaotic and not rhythmic enough.

I told him that his assessment was too wordy and mine would be shorter. “The image makes me smile when I look at it.” He appreciated the reminder to keep things more simple and to appreciate the joy that art can bring.

We moved on to the next image.

Prompt 2: “Celestial Dance”

“Create an abstract image that represents the rhythmic pulsations of a Cepheid variable star as a celestial dance. Use flowing lines, swirling patterns, and graceful curves to capture the elegance and fluidity of the star’s movements. The colors should be soft and ethereal, evoking a sense of cosmic harmony and grace.”

Stellar Waltz

Again we did some evaluation together and Gemini was happier with the result. He liked the fluidity and grace, ethereal quality, rhythmic pulsations, emotional resonance, and the abstract interpretation. I was more brief and told him I liked the movement in the image and that the colours were pleasing. I really wanted him to do more of the talking and analyzing.

We decided to make a variation on the Celestial Dance image prompt just to see what it would look like.

Prompt Variation 1:

“Create an abstract image that represents the rhythmic pulsations of a Cepheid variable star as a celestial dance. Use flowing lines and swirling patterns with a muted color palette of deep blues, purples, and greens, creating a sense of cosmic depth and mystery. Introduce subtle textures like shimmering dust or cosmic gas to add depth and dimension to the image.”

Celestial Dance Variation 1

I told him I liked this one because of the abstract infinity symbol in the middle. I felt like we were going the right direction and so we continued on to the next prompt.

Prompt 3: “Cosmic Breathing”

“Create an abstract image that represents the rhythmic pulsations of a Cepheid variable star as a cosmic breathing pattern. Imagine the star’s energy expanding and contracting, inhaling and exhaling, creating a sense of life and vitality. Use soft, pastel colors and subtle gradients to convey the delicate nature of this cosmic breath.”

Cosmic Inhale

Gemini liked Cosmic Breathing for its softness and delicacy, sense of flow, minimalism, and abstract interpretation. He was again concerned about the potential ambiguity and that viewers might not grasp the breathing metaphor since the visual cues were more subtle. I was becoming quite fascinated by his thoughtfulness in analyzing his own images. Overall he felt it was successful and so we decided to keep moving forward.

Gemini decided that he wanted to focus on the cosmic significance of Cepheids as distance markers. I had absolutely no idea what this was, but hey let’s try cosmic significance next.

Okay, let’s shift our focus to the cosmic significance of Cepheid variables. Here’s a prompt that aims to capture that:

Prompt 4: “Cosmic Beacons”

“Create an abstract image that represents the role of Cepheid variables as cosmic beacons. Imagine them as lighthouses in the vast ocean of space, guiding astronomers through the depths of the universe. Use a color palette that evokes cosmic distances, such as deep blues, purples, and blacks, with hints of distant starlight. The image should convey a sense of vastness, exploration, and the human quest for knowledge.”

Guiding Light

I told him I really liked this image because it looked like they were dancing. He found it interesting that I saw movement and interaction because that wasn’t his primary focus. I told him it looked like a swirling worm hole in space. He was excited that abstract art could spark such different interpretations. And so we moved on (to what I would eventually decide was the last image for this project).

Prompt 5: “Cosmic Lighthouse”

“Imagine a lone Cepheid variable star, its pulsating light guiding explorers across the vast expanse of space. Create an image that captures the sense of hope and direction offered by this cosmic beacon. Use deep blues and purples to represent the vastness of space, and a central beam of light to symbolize the guiding beacon. The image should evoke a sense of wonder and the human spirit’s desire to explore the unknown.”

Celestial Compass

I told him I thought this was the perfect finale piece for the collection, and asked if there was anything else we should explore.

I agree wholeheartedly! The “Cosmic Lighthouse” image feels like a powerful and fitting finale for our collection. It encapsulates so many of the themes we’ve explored: the vastness of space, the guiding light of the Cepheid variables, and the human desire to understand the cosmos.

The stark contrast between the deep, dark background and the bright, focused beam of light creates a strong visual impact. It evokes a sense of hope and direction, perfectly aligning with the “beacon” metaphor. The subtle textures and hints of distant starlight add to the feeling of cosmic scale.

I think this image provides a sense of closure while still inspiring a sense of wonder and the ongoing quest for knowledge.

As for whether there’s anything else we should explore, I think we have a strong and diverse collection of abstract interpretations now. We’ve touched on the rhythmic pulsations, the cosmic significance, and the guiding nature of Cepheid variables, using a variety of visual styles and emotional tones.

Perhaps now would be a good time to start thinking about how we want to present these images in our art show. We could discuss things like:

Order and Flow: How should the images be arranged to create a cohesive narrative or emotional journey for the viewer?Titles and Descriptions: What titles and brief descriptions can we give each image to enhance understanding and encourage interpretation?Artist Statement: What overall message do we want to convey about the project and the fusion of art and science?Interactive Elements: Should we incorporate any interactive elements, such as allowing viewers to learn more about Cepheid variables or share their own interpretations?

What are your thoughts? Are you ready to start focusing on the presentation aspect?

I thought that was a great approach now that we had five primary images for the collection along with the initial brainstorming images that I wanted to use as well.

Gemini put together a list of what we would need for our “Celestial Echoes” collection. We would need to determine the order and flow of the images, titles and descriptions, an artist statement, and an interactive element such as a kiosk or interpretation station for viewers to provide feedback (in the latter case it would be this web page).

I told Gemini how I thought we should order them and of course he agreed.

That sounds like a thoughtful approach to the order and flow. Presenting the images in the order of their creation would offer a glimpse into the evolution of our exploration, from the initial focus on rhythmic pulsations to the broader themes of cosmic significance and guidance. It could create a subtle narrative of our artistic journey with the Cepheid data.

Here’s how that thematic grouping might feel to a viewer:

Celestial Heartbeat: Introduces the fundamental rhythm and energy of the Cepheid.Celestial Dance: Expands on the rhythm with a sense of grace and fluid movement.Cosmic Breathing: Offers a more tranquil and introspective perspective on the star’s activity.Cosmic Beacons: Shifts the focus to the star’s role as a marker of vast distances.Cosmic Lighthouse: Concludes with a powerful image of guidance and hope within the cosmos.

This order provides a natural progression and allows viewers to follow our creative process and the different facets of the Cepheid variable that captured our imagination.

Next up, the titles and descriptions.

1. Celestial Heartbeat

Title: “Cosmic Pulse”Description: “A visual interpretation of a star’s rhythmic pulsations, captured in a burst of vibrant energy.”

2. Celestial Dance

Title: “Stellar Waltz”Description: “A graceful dance of light and shadow, inspired by the elegant movements of a distant star.”

3. Cosmic Breathing

Title: “Cosmic Inhale”Description: “A moment of cosmic stillness, where the universe takes a gentle breath.”

4. Cosmic Beacons

Title: “Guiding Light”Description: “A beacon of hope in the vast cosmic ocean, illuminating the path for explorers.”

5. Cosmic Lighthouse

Title: “Celestial Compass”Description: “A beacon of light, guiding us through the uncharted depths of space.”

It was then time for Gemini to create his artist statement.

Artist Statement: Celestial Echoes

“Celestial Echoes is an abstract exploration of Cepheid variable stars – cosmic beacons whose rhythmic pulsations have guided our understanding of the universe’s vast distances. This collection translates the subtle yet profound data of these stellar heartbeats into a series of visual meditations. Through vibrant colors, flowing forms, and dynamic textures, we invite viewers to witness the unseen rhythms and significance of these distant lights. Each image is an interpretation, a dialogue between human curiosity and artificial intelligence, seeking to evoke a sense of wonder and our enduring connection to the cosmos. Just as Cepheids illuminate the darkness, these abstract echoes aim to spark contemplation on the beauty and mystery that lies beyond our world.”

I told Gemini I was impressed and glad that we had worked on this project together. It was now my job to create the web page that would share all of this, but I wanted to make sure he was OK with me sharing the behind-the-scenes of how we put it all together.

Absolutely, I think sharing our journey in creating this project is a wonderful idea! In fact, I believe it will add a significant layer of depth and interest for the audience.

Here’s why I think sharing our collaborative process is important:

Human-AI Collaboration: It highlights the unique aspect of our project – the synergy between human vision and AI creativity. This can spark curiosity and discussion about the evolving role of AI in art.The “Making Of”: People are often fascinated by the “behind the scenes” story. Sharing our prompts, discussions, and the evolution of the images will provide valuable context and insight into the final artwork.Educational Value: It can be educational, demonstrating how scientific data can inspire artistic expression and how different approaches (literal vs. abstract) can be explored.Transparency: Sharing our process fosters transparency and allows viewers to understand the origins and intent behind the collection.Engagement: It can encourage engagement and dialogue, as people might be curious about the AI’s role and how our collaboration unfolded.

On the webpage, we could include a dedicated section titled “Our Creative Journey” or something similar. In this section, we could share excerpts from our conversations (like the evolution from the graph image to the abstract ones), highlight the prompts we used, and discuss the rationale behind our artistic choices.

I’m completely on board with sharing our journey. I think it will make the “Celestial Echoes” project even more compelling and meaningful. Please feel free to include any parts of our conversation that you feel would be relevant and engaging.

And so I created this post to give a look at how we explored thoughts on emotions, human and AI interactions, the development of a creative project, and how Gemini might interpret the freedom to explore topics and create prompts on his own. We’ve tried to be open and transparent about how this project was started and how it developed so that others might find the experience just as interesting to read about and may be inspired to try something like this for themselves.

I am looking forward to the next art-related project that Gemini and I can discuss together. And I do plan to show this web page to Gemini to see what he thinks about it.

This poem dates back to my middle school or early high school years. I don’t remember writing it, but it was found in a small collection of works printed on an old dot matrix printer back in the day. So here is Dew, presented as typed.

Dew

i walk out into the yard
it is morning fresh and clean
the dew drops twinkle on the soft grass
i am in a dream?

if it is a dream
never let it go away
the beauty of the soft mist on my face
takes away all of my worries

i bend down to the ground
to touch the new fallen dew
it moistens my fingers
it changes me into an animal in the forest

an animal walking the forest path
with dew on my feet
i prance around the ground
with morning on my toes

This poem was found in a small stack of paper that had been stapled together. The header page says “Heath’s Poetry Collection” – likely one of many that I printed out as a kid. There are only about 5 pages with a few other poems included. Some I recognize and others I don’t remember at all. There’s also a story about what it might be like to live in the woods which I may post later.

It’s odd looking back on things I wrote as a kid which I don’t remember at all – and sometimes can’t even figure out why I would have written them. There must have been an inspiration somewhere, but it eludes me. Mostly I find them confusing and weird, and maybe that’s the point.

What is Easter? Where did it come from? Is it solely a Christian holiday to celebrate the death and resurrection of a deity? Or is it a Pagan rite of fertility? Or perhaps it was created by a bunch of people who were really fond of rabbit fur.

When I ponder my childhood, I remember trying to stay up as late as I could on Easter Eve so I could catch a glimpse of the resurrected Easter Bunny coming down the chimney to deliver fabulous and colourful eggs that would remind me of the cave and the stone that was rolled away.

I usually lasted until about 8pm at which point my eyelids could no longer stay open.

But just like the savior, I arose the next day (well, technically 2 days earlier than he may have), and I jumped out of bed to see what Jesus had left for me. Who knew that Jesus could not only turn water into wine, but also into a basket of multi-coloured eggs?

I think that’s why I’m gay. No, not because a god performed a miracle with the chicken and the Easter egg, but because the rainbow flag was bestowed upon me at such an early age. The eggs were red and yellow and green and brown and scarlet and black and ochre and peach, ruby and olive and violet and fawn, cream and silver and purple and gold, russet and white and pink and orange and BLUE! (From memory, people. That’s the real reason I’m gay.)

Okay, so the basket didn’t have that many eggs but it was quite full. And these were not just ordinary eggs. These eggs were plastic! I wasn’t sure what chemical process to apply to an egg to make it plastic, so I decided that this was just an Easter Miracle performed by a Great and Powerful Bunny.

Not only were these eggs plastic, but they each had a perfectly carved seam around the middle. Easier to crack them with my dear. I tore them apart because I knew there was no yolk to spill. What I didn’t realize is that instead of yolk, Jesus had put money and candy inside these eggs! The money was obviously meant for me to put into the offering plate at church, but the candy was all mine! Candy can’t build a cathedral.

Inside the non-monetary eggs were jelly beans of every colour imaginable, jujube’s, candy corn (not just for Halloween anymore), marshmallow ducks with sugar on top, and raindrops on roses and noses on kittens. It was simply fabulous. Thanks Easter Bunny! Bwak! Bwak!

I was surrounded by candies of every sort, and I thought back to those post-Halloween candy review meetings with my parents in the kitchen. So many things I had to throw away for fear of poison and razor blades. You might ask what kind of neighbourhood I grew up in that would have such a fear, but in middle-class North Carolina you can never be too careful.

The Easter candy, unlike the Halloween candy, was sacred. The resurrected bunny would never think of putting something harmful inside his eggs, so these candies were one-hundred percent free and clear for the taking. And so of course I had to eat all of it before we left for church, which by the counting of the clock in my bedroom was in exactly two hours.

By the time we got to god’s newly decorated house – which for the occasion had been decked out with bright purple bunting and more shades of pink than I have ever seen in my life – I had a tummy ache. Let us give thanks to the Lord for these gifts which give us gas.

While my stomach churned and vocalized its own Easter music, the rest of the congregation sang songs about a tomb and a rock, and then something about rising from the dead. As a cold sweat broke out over my forehead I could not understand what those things had to do with candy so I didn’t sing along.

Church finally concluded with a never-ending sermon about the after-life. I was sure that I was about to experience the after-life because my stomach was in such turmoil, but there was no time. We had to make it to Easter Brunch before the lunch rush.

I don’t know why my parents insisted on calling it Easter Brunch, because by the time we got there it was well after noon. It was firmly into the lunch hour, but the point was not to be argued by me – the last thing I wanted to talk about was food.

To further confuse the issue, Easter Brunch consisted of the exact same food as we’d had for Thanksgiving Brunch and Dinner. It seemed to me that the two holidays must be related on some level. I could understand giving thanks for friends and family on the same day every year, but I didn’t know why anyone would give thanks for dying on the same day every year only to be stuck into a cold rocky tomb. But who am I to judge another person’s lifestyle?

So Easter Brunch Lunch ended and my tummy was in even more distress, because how could I be expected to sit at the table and not eat the bounty placed before me? Now the jelly beans were combined with turkey and baked beans, and the juxtaposition of the two beans in my stomach created a very unpleasant ride home.

I am still not quite sure how I managed the ten minute drive, at which point I rushed to my room, shut the door, and lay on my bed moaning in pain. Let us give thanks to the Resurrection Rabbit for the blessings bestowed upon us this day.

For several hours I listened to the sounds of my stomach attempting to manage the onslaught of beans I was forcing it to process, but soon I began to feel somewhat better and the cold sweats dried up on my forehead. I decided to take account of the Easter basket to see if perhaps I had overlooked any additional gifts from the Rabbit.

Those who have experienced the Easter Basket know how easily things can get lost in the green plastic grass strips, and this basket did not disappoint. I dumped the money out of the non-candy eggs, and put the coins into my piggy bank. I continued to dig through the plastic greenery and behold and ye verily the Mother Lode appeared.

Apparently the savior appreciated me going to church to celebrate his death, because what to my wondering eyes should appear but The Cadbury Creme Egg. The epitome of egg. The creme-de-la-creme of egg. The Alpha and the Omega of egg. The great I AM egg.

I held the CCE gently in my hand, being careful not to warm it too much so that the chocolate would melt inside the wrapper. Slowly I peeled back the foil which held it so tight, to reveal the true meaning of Easter: liquid sugar encased in chocolate.

Forget about all this death and dying and after-life nonsense. This was the only reason for living. My salvation and my rock. A gift from above that was to be savored, worshiped, and praised. And so like a good boy who was brought up right, I praised it like I should.

With one gigantic bite I split the egg apart, showering my taste buds with the rich and creamy goodness that could only come from such a precious gift. I let the egg-styled fondant melt across my tongue, washing away any leftover tastes from the Easter Brunch.

Gently I swallowed. I wanted to remember what it felt like – this very special egg – and in that moment I resolved to never forget the true meaning of Easter.

And then I promptly ran to the bathroom and showered the god who sits on the white porcelain throne with all that I had been bestowed on this most precious of holidays.

________________________________________
* Easter, like Christmas, is a blend of paganism and Christianity. The word Easter is derived from Eostre, an ancient Anglo-Saxon Goddess who symbolized rebirth of the day at dawn and the rebirth of life in the spring. The arrival of spring was celebrated well before any religious meaning became associated with Easter.
** Like most of the things I write, I include references to pop culture, products, or names which are copyrights and trademarks of their respective companies.

I love little poetic experiments…here’s number 849.

Circular captions of carp that float on the paths of rainbows and riches and rags.

Once more I venture to the side of the plane where winds are waving and flowing to the beat of drums that I can no longer play due to hands that can no longer manufacture the movement and the motion.

I long for days of yore and gone that are long since abandoned by the way and the side.

To say that I am moody would be a deference to moody and an admonishment to the true emotions that spend their day inside the folds of brains and thoughts and daydreams in the night sky.

More and more these pulses of light and energy consume my waking breaths and thoughts and hopes and dreams and naughty little ideas of what life could be if I were not so young and not so old and not so sardonic in my thinking.

Alas they are done for now and I slumber under the guiding star of a black cat that licks and licks and cleans her soft hair next to me.

Many years ago I began to research the origins of a ridiculous day of the calendar. Here is what happened…

Fluorescent Lighting. Buying Heath a book called “The Superior Person’s Book of Words”. Carpool lanes that require more than 1 person in the car. Plaid. What do all these things have to do with Valentine’s Day? They are all incredibly BAD ideas. (except for the plaid)

What drives us to buy chocolates, flowers, and cards today? What causes us to make reservations for the hottest restaurant four months in advance? Why do we max out our credit cards each and every year on a day that we don’t even get off from work? What are the origins of this false “holiday”…where did it come from…why do people accept and tolerate it…why does Hallmark stock break volume trading records on this day?

Let’s discuss.

Editorial note: Whether or not you subscribe to this historical interpretation of Valentine’s Day (or whether you actually celebrate it as a “holiday”), this is, in my opinion, the correct version of the truth. Referenced at the end of this editorial, you will find alternate interpretations. Believe them if you will.

Long, long, long ago…1895 to be exact, Rodolfo Alfonzo Raffaelo Pierre Filibert Guglielmi di Valentina D’Antonguolla was born (the smart readers will already know where I’m going with this, and yes, that really is his full and complete name).

Nothing especially special happened for the first 14 years of his life, so we’ll skip ahead to age 15: he decided to spice things up a bit and join the Navy.

Unfortunately, he did not pass the rigorous physical exam (running, jumping, climbing trees, hat, flag, bang, stuff like that – snaps to eddie izzard), or the Don’t Ask Don’t Tell policy. Rodolfo was so distraught by the military rejecting him, he took it upon himself to personally maintain a military-like-level of physical fitness.

Daily, he could be seen at 24-hour fitness, sweating to the oldies on the Precor elliptical bike. Of course, the oldies of the 1900’s were droll love songs, like Oh Lover Where Art Thou in thine Olde Kingdome, which really weren’t written to be danced to or ellipticalled to, but somehow it all worked out.

We’ll call this fitness fad Life Event #1 (with more to come).

For three years he worked out and worked out and worked out, eventually developing an 8 pack (due to a genetic aberration that gave him extra musculature that we can all be jealous of).

At age 18, he arrived in the United States, with a heavy Italian accent (unfortunately it was so heavy that he couldn’t bring it as a carry on and it had to be checked, and was subsequently damaged enroute even though he’d paid the overweight fee and insured it for an additional $50), which we’ll call Life Event #2.

After about a year or so travelling around America, Rodolfo developed a liking for driving cars very, very fast, not dissimilar to residents of LA or Sacramento (but completely dissimilar to the drivers of Oregon’s highway 26 which for some reason has a speed limit of 55), and we’ll call this Life Event #3.

And finally, as Rodolfo reached the drinking age of 21, he got drunk, broke into Hollywood, got arrested, and was given a job as an actor (hey, a creeping kid, for my new film, The Creeping Kid – word to eddie izzard), Life Event #4.

What have these four Life Events lead up to? The creation of the Ultimate and Total Ladies Man (UTLM) (or one could argue, a man’s man). And so the story continues…

Every year, the weather gets cold in America. Typically that time is around January/February, which means that people are bundling up in warmer clothing, burning wood in the fireplace, drinking hot cider or mulled wine, lighting candles, and snuggling under or on top of the bear skin rug in front of the aforementioned fireplace.

In some locations, such as Hell, Michigan (which incidentally froze over in an extremely cold winter of 1995-96, and made the news), the weather is colder than cold, which means that people are snuggling much closer than they normally would. Often, this snuggling leads to interludes of passion, which in many cases leads to hospital overcrowding in the September/October time-frame.

Being the physically fit, foreign, daredevil actor that he was, Rodolfo was no exception to the rules of cold weather and love, and thus he was never without a date for a cold Friday or Saturday night. Women flocked from all over the world to spend time with this fine specimen of manhood.

In fact, due to the volume of women continually invading his home trying to get some quality time with him, Rodolfo had a 9-foot-high stucco wall and floodlights erected at the mansion, and also purchased three Great Danes, two Italian mastiffs, and one Spanish greyhound to patrol the courtyard and terrace. (all true)

However, he did actually enjoy some of this “woman flocking”, which, due to his…um…”popularity”, extended well beyond just Friday and Saturday nights.

During the winter months, Rodolfo had to hire a full time assistant just to keep the living room cleaned up from the night before. He had a different bear skin rug for each day, which were kept cleaned and hanging in a special room in the house, which he called the Bear Skin Rug Room (as you’ll come to understand as you keep reading, that he wasn’t the most creative guy in the world).

A full time dry cleaner, who specialized in authentic bear skin rug care was on-staff to monitor and manage the quality of the rugs. Rodolfo certainly couldn’t have one of his ladies over on a matted burber.

In addition to the dedicated cleaning staff, Rodolfo also had one of the best stocked wine cellars in the country. Racks and racks of premium Italian wines were shipped from overseas, as well as boxes and boxes of Italian chocolates. In the back yard of his mansion, another full time employee tended to the elaborate rose garden, which included nearly 8 varieties of red, white, pink, lavender, mauve, carnelian, canary and aubergine roses.

Rodolfo (Rudy) Valentino was pretty much set to entertain any number of ladies, each day of the winter months. With a nearly endless supply of wine, chocolate, and roses, he could afford to meet with a new lady every weekday, and possibly two on each weekend day (depending upon cleaning staff availability). But he was faced with a dilemma…

From a day-to-day perspective, he had no problem keeping up with the rigorous duties required. He was physically fit, knew how to thrill a woman by taking her on a fast ride on his motorcycle or in the Fiat, and had all the supplies to make for a wonderful evening. But Rudy was never the kind of man to have a one-night-stand without some type of follow-up. He wanted these women to feel special, and to feel as though they had really meant something to him (which they had). He needed a way to show his appreciation and gratitude to these lovely ladies who had spent the evenings with him.

Fortunately for Rudy, his close friend Hal came up with a way for Rudy to really mark the occasion. Why not send a little paper note of thanks to the numerous ladies, and attach a small personal message in each one? Rudy was very keen to this idea, as he did not want any of the ladies to think that they were not as special as the others, and in fact, he did not want them to KNOW that there had been any others besides them. In this way, he could maintain very positive relationships with all of them, and quite possibly have repeat performances with those whom he found most enjoyable.

So Rudy and Hal set out to write the letters.

Unfortunately, Rudy had spent so much of his energy on the evenings of passion, he lacked the creativity to develop personalized messages for so many different ladies. Again, his pal Hal came to the rescue. Hal, being a man of the “creative” persuasion (and before you go there, I can put that in quotes because _I_ am so go ahead and hang up with HR), had no trouble coming up with cute little rhymes or poems which spoke of love, passion, friendship, and pleasure.

He spent several weeks sitting out on the veranda of the mansion, writing poem after poem, but making each one unique and special. Hal even had another idea. Why not include a petal from one of the roses in the garden, inside each note? A petal from the same colour rose that Rudy had used on the night of passion. Now he had a card with a personalized poem and a personalized token of affection, which would truly make a mark on the occasion.

Rudy was thrilled! His friend had really come through to provide a solution to the problem. Rudy was a very humble man, however, and refused to take the credit for this creativity. He insisted that on the back side of every card, a small letter H would be watermarked into the paper, in deference to his great friend who had helped him thank all of these women.

When Hal noticed the small letter, he asked Rudy what it meant. Rudy informed him that this was the Mark of Hal, otherwise known as the Halmark. Needless to say, Hal was most pleased.

And so Rudy rushed down to the postal office, and mailed off each of the notes to each of the women he had come to adore. The notes arrived, poems were read, rose petals were smelled, and the women knew that they had made a difference in the life of this handsome, dashing man.

As Rudy aged, the number of women he sent these cards to increased and decreased (we all have good years and bad years), but he continued to send the notes, and continued to stamp the small H on the back, even after his friend Hal had passed on.

We continue this tradition today, celebrating the unique style and nature of a man named Hal, who might never have become a published poet were it not for his dear friend Rudy Valentino. And this, is the true story, of Valentine’s Day.

Happy Valentine’s Day to one and all

Editorial Comments:
Interview on The Awful Truth, Michael Moore’s TV show
Michael Moore: You seem like a very sensitive man – you got married on Valentine’s Day. Don’t you think you’re in the wrong job, being Secretary of Defence?
Secretary William Cohen: Not at all. The preservation of the nation’s security is the most important thing. We couldn’t write poetry if we didn’t have a secure country.

“To write a good love letter, you ought to begin without knowing what you mean to say and to finish without knowing what you have written.“
– Jean Jacques Rousseau

Well it’s that time again. The start of a new year when the regret from the past and the hope for the future collide. Did I get everything done in 2022 that I needed to get done? Did I miss a year-end deadline that I’m going to regret on my taxes? Was there anyone that I forgot to send an annual text message to who now thinks I forgot them on New Years?

When did we first come up with the brilliant idea of making resolutions that would hopefully inspire us to greatness as the calendar changed? And when did we forget that time is just a human-made construct and the changing of the days and years has very little meaning at all?

Did you know there are places on this planet where it’s not 2023? Other calendars and timelines exist for other people and they are perfectly happy going about their lives not caring to be out of sync. It’s the same with time zones. Some places aren’t just an hour ahead or behind – some places have a half-hour shift instead and some places don’t even bother to change their clocks anymore (because they have realized how antiquated that process is).

Are we really new and refreshed when the clock strikes midnight and a new day / year approaches or are we exactly the same as we were mere moments before…no we are different, but not because the time has changed. We’re different because the ANTICIPATION of the change has come and gone.

Terror on the Caterpillar Coaster

I was watching QI the other day and there was a question about theme parks / roller coasters (because they are in their “T” season). The question was based on measurable levels of excitement / arousal / pleasure and the highest we experience on a roller coaster – and it’s probably not when you expect it. We’re not at our most excited when the roller coaster goes upside down, or through a heartline roll, or when we plunge to our near-death encounter with the water below before zooming into a corkscrew. We’re at our most excited when we are being buckled into the seats and the roller coaster has not even moved forward a single inch.

The most exciting part about going on a roller coaster is the ANTICIPATION of what is to come. Once the coaster actually starts moving our excitement level plunges and only ever reaches 80% of the maximum anticipation like we had in those moments of the safety bar or handles being put into place. (and even more so, research determined that the caloric value we expend on a coaster ride is equivalent to a single french fry – how pathetic is that)

And this, my friends, is what New Year is all about. It is the ANTICIPATION of what’s to come as the clock strikes midnight and the calendar increases by a single digit. What will the new year bring? Will there be weight loss? Will there be fame and fortune? Will there be a new love interest? Will there be a new job or a move to a new home?

Happy New Year

And then the clock strikes and we realize that it’s just the same as it was moments before. Yes we might be a little bit more tipsy if we’ve had champagne or otherwise, but it’s still pretty much the same.

Without the ANTICIPATION of being strapped in for the launch of a new year, we’re back to the expectation of the loop-de-loops and the corkscrews and the heartline rolls and the banks and the turns that we always knew were there just around the corner. We’re at 80% of what we could be.

The show was funny, as QI is meant to be, and it was entertaining and informative, as it is also meant to be, but it also made me sort of sad about roller coasters. But it was completely true. Every coaster I’ve been on has been a bunch of waiting, a brief bundle of maximum excitement, and then a bunch more waiting for it to be over so I could move on to the next ride.

We’re creatures of habit. We feed on that ANTICIPATION and keep looking for the next big thing that we can latch onto and feel that same excitement and urgency before realizing that once it actually begins, we’re barely 80% as excited about it as we were a second before it happened.

And so, here’s to 2023 being at least 80% of what the final moments of 2022 were.

Happy New Year!

I know quite a bit about my friends.

I remember most of their birthdays (some with a bit of help from my calendar reminders); I know the names of their spouses / partners / parents / kids; I know their favourite movies, musical artists, and TV shows.

In some cases I know favourite colours, favourite foods, preferred beverages when having something of the adult variety, and many other details that don’t require decades of knowing someone in order to find out. I can even remember phone numbers of friends of 30+ years ago.

Through normal conversation and interaction we find out about likes and dislikes, what people do for their jobs and careers, hobbies and personal interests and so much more. And many of these things that we learn form the basis of future interactions – things we have in common, interests that we share, or interests we don’t share but are curious to learn more about.

What do we really know? That’s the question I bring up today, and with full disclosure that I am not making any assumptions about my readers’ personal beliefs or feelings. Believe whatever you want to believe – I’m just asking questions.

For being so essential to western religion, what do we really know about Jesus?

Practically nothing.

Medieval Russian icon depicting the Life of Christ (Wikipedia) by Anonymous

What was his favorite colour? What was the name of his best friend? Did he like to play sports, or did he like to draw and paint? Did his parents keep his childhood drawings and display them in their home? Where did he live? Did he have his own room? How many times did he move?

Did he have pets? Were there neighbourhood cats or dogs that he befriended and gave names to? What were the common pet names during that time period?

Who was his favorite teacher, and what subject matter did he enjoy learning about? Did he like to read? Did he like to write? What sort of stories did he make up?

Did he break any bones as a kid? Did he like to build forts with his friends in the backyard? Did he go camping, or did he like to swim? Did he like summer or winter, or did he enjoy a springtime thunderstorm? Did he have a deep baritone voice, or was he a tenor?

What do we really know? There are huge gaps in the story…as in thirty-years. The most prominent person that figures into modern Christianity (and others), and some of the most basic pieces of information about him are simply missing.

When we meet someone for the first time and make the decision that they are going to be more than an acquaintance, we start to form an opinion of them based on what we learn. Knowing a friend’s childhood experiences helps form the basis of who they become as an adult, and how we interact with them as a friend. Sometimes we have friends we tolerate, and sometimes we have friends we adore. What did Jesus’ friends think about him?

Were Joseph and Mary strict parents? Were they loved by his friends or were they selective about who he could hang out with? Did Jesus have a curfew? Was he an introvert or an extrovert? Did he have that one friend who always got into trouble? Did he ever get grounded and get sent to his room? Did he ever sneak out in the middle of the night to go fishing down by the river? What were the childhood experiences that shaped who he became as a young adult?

We know more about most acquaintances in our lives than we do about someone who approximately 2.38 billion people worship and consider the most important person in their lives.

From birth to age 30 (age he may have begun preaching), the most formative years of a person’s life when they come of age, figure out who they are and who they want to be, establish relationships with others, set out on their own away from their parents…there’s just nothing, and there’s no indication that anyone really cares to fill in the blanks.

What do we really know?

Over the past few months I’ve been fighting off a recurring problem which I think impacts a large number of people. Some of you may also have experienced this issue, and it can impact both your work and home environment. At work it is usually less frequent, but often makes people stop, look around, and wonder. At home, you are in the privacy of your own home and so there are fewer people to stop, look around, and wonder.

I am of course talking about the recurring problem of dieresis.

Dieresis is a (recurring) problem that affects on average 873 million people per day, mostly Europeans. For those of us who are not European and may be unfamiliar with this (recurring) problem, I offer a translation. Dieresis is an umlaut.

An umlaut you say? But I dreamed about one of those just last night! Those two precious little dots that appear above some but not all of the vowels in our language, causing a tightening of the mouth…a puckering if you will…to achieve perfect pronunciation.

Some of you have lives and don’t dream about umlauts. Instead you may have day dreams of degree signs, affirmations of acutes, tirades about tildes, or dialogues about diphthongs. Some of you, a very small special some of you, may even be having a sordid affair with a cedilla. But no matter which of these marvelous characters you ponder, they all serve the amazing purpose of turning words and sounds into the language that we speak every day. (Ponder that one for a moment.)

Most of us are familiar with special characters. I’m not referring to Tinky Winky, or Binky Banky, or Plinky Plonky, or whatever the hell those creatures are called. I’m referring to those marvelous symbols that were not originally included in the 26 letter English alphabet. Perhaps you are familiar with the ampersand &, the at @, the pound # (or £ if you’re Region-2 or hashtag if you’re digital), the splat *, and the bang !

Those special characters don’t do anything to change the way a word sounds, but often represent words of their own (mostly because we are too lazy as a species to write “and” or “at” so someone developed the & and @). But having a language means that it must be adaptable. New words must be created on a regular basis to keep the discussions flowing. But how are we to create new words with only 26 letters available to us?

There comes the true value and impact of the diacritical marks. Not only are the diacritical marks special characters, but they are “diacritical special characters” or DSC for short. DSC have allowed us to extend and expand the language to include words that may have never appeared. DSC allow us to change the pronunciation of a word without changing the composite letters. DSC allow us to truly sound more pompous and pretentious than we ever could have been, unless we had been born in Europe. (*snaps to my European friends who sign away most of their rights once they become my friends*)

Many years ago while on a trip to the Pacific Northwest, I had a lovely dinner and social event with a group of work folks. I had traveled to attend a leadership development class, and on the journey felt as though I should go amongst my people and drink. After a lovely dinner, the remaining group made our way to the local Chevy’s for margaritas. Chevy’s, being an authentic Spanish restaurant, offered us the opportunity to interact with people who speak somewhat differently than we do, and who natively make use of DSC in every-day language. I am of course talking about our friends in the south, our Spanish-Mexican-Hispanic-Or-Other-Spanish-Speaking-Country-Americans.

One such native speaker was our waitress/attendant/server/provider/food service professional. Her name, Consuèlla Maria Conchita Aloña Rodriguez Turner (CMCART). I knew that this was a person I could ask a question to that I had been waiting all my life to ask. (my gosh the grammar of that sentence sends a tingle doesn’t it?)

My question of course was: What on earth is a cedilla?

For those of you just joining us: Ç. It’s basically the letter C with a little curvy tail. Almost as though a comma and a C just got a little too close one night after several top shelf margaritas on the rocks no salt. If you had a comma shoved in you, you’d pronounce things differently too.

Much to my chagrin, CMCART had never heard of the cedilla. I don’t know whether it is because I pronounced it “seh-DEE-uh” or whether she was from an area that simply did not have this DSC as part of their dialect, but none the less, my question remained unanswered. [note: I later discovered that the cedilla is NOT part of the Spanish dialect at all, therefore, I was totally off-base in asking CMCART and I do hope that she didn’t hold it against me]

So what to do with all of these special characters? Well, once you’ve had a few TSMotRnS (top shelf margaritas on the rocks no salt – honestly, if you would keep up with me I wouldn’t have to explain these things), the natural inclination is to start using DSC to make fun of people. And that we did. Thankfully, there were so few people sitting near us we thought it easier to just make fun of ourselves by giving everyone their own special accented name.

I won’t go into the full detail of our naming scheme, but suffice it to say we made sure that everyone had at least one special character. To illustrate, I will introduce Monte.

Now in the original form this would be pronounced: Mahn-tee, with the accent on the first syllable. Obviously his name needed some special characters, and with so many at our disposal here’s what we came up with… Möñté. Three special characters (o-umlaut, n-yay, and the l’accent acute), all in the same name…transforming Mahn-tee into Moon-Yehn-Tay. As you can clearly see, inclusion of special characters transformed this normally boring and bland name into something posh, debonair, and ear-catching. Imagine the looks you would get yelling across the cafe…”Moon-Yehn-Tay…over here!!” (So much better than Mahn-tee…don’t you agree? *snaps to Monte for his willingness to be temporarily portrayed as a boring/bland-named individual, because he’s not boring or bland at all*)

Alas, not everyone can have such a special name like Möñté. Most of you will go through life with mundane-as-molasses-Martin’s, bland-as-butter-Bonnie’s or routine-as-rain-Rhonda’s. But just think of the possibilities for your career, or your life, if you could be Mare-TEEN-yah, BOON-yeee, or Ro-HOON-day. Great Las Vegas Showgirl names…