Linda Armstrong's Blog - Posts Tagged "empathy"
Empath or Highly Sensitive Person?
The term 'Highly Sensitive Person' seems to be a fairly new phrase in terms of the longevity of the language. There seemed to be a need to define the word 'empath' better, and so the 'HSP' came about. But what is the difference?
I've read enough of the opinions of 'experts' to know already that I disagree with a lot of the things they say. Please understand that I'm not an expert, and what I write is only my opinion. Feel free to disagree or come up with your own opinion, as your experience will probably differ from mine, or even the 'experts.'
I find that the differences between HSPs and empaths is a matter of training. And by that, I don't mean training to become an empath, but how to handle the physical, emotional and mental side effects of the condition.
Empathy is a totally natural state of human consciousness. Even animals have empathy. It is the ability to understand the pain and emotions of other people or life forms. It is how each person reacts to the information contained in that understanding that makes a highly sensitive person. I believe that many of the traits of a HSP come from a lack of understanding of triggers and learning how to deal with them. When the HSP starts in childhood to learn how to deal with the extremes of being an empath, life is much more manageable.
Children are not idiots! They can learn from a very young age how to get what they need or want, even if they (or the parents) are unaware that they are doing it. Even as children, we teach people how to treat us. If a child is not getting what they want, they will throw a fit, have a meltdown or a huge reaction to something that is unusual. In this way, the reaction of the people around them is what they are craving, and they have learned how to get it by the HSP behavior. Energy is a food that we take for granted and never talk about. Being an empath is like knowing how to bridge into someone else's emotional body and feel what they are feeling, in essence, energetically 'eating' their energy. The healthy thing to do after such an incident would be to disconnect the bridge and process the emotions of that other person. Who teaches you how to do that, especially when you are a child? Too often, we keep that bridge going because of the energetic payoff. It might be negative energy, but sometimes that is all the person's energy body wants.
This means that there are two types of empaths: those who can shut down this bridge and those who don't/won't. Processing? No one ever talks about that.
Take for example someone who loves speaking. They feed on the adulation of the audience, the oohs and aahs feed them energetically. Highly sensitive people might not know how to get the energy from other people that they crave in a way that is socially acceptable, so they find ways that bring that to them. Crying excessively, throwing tantrums, etc. Helping a HSP child to understand why they are behaving to the stress that they feel is tremendously helpful to the child and the parent/guardian.
Empaths are people who feel energy coming from other people, HSPs, in my opinion, are created when they are unable to shut down the connection to other people. Imagine what a tremendous load that can be when in a crowd of people, or just an accumulation of these connections. Too much stress and over time, they become more susceptible to many other little stressors that come along in life.
Things that I've found trigger a HSP are so mundane that sometimes HSPs don't realize that they get triggered by them. Some are so under the radar that it is hard to detect them, but it pays to become the detective in your own life and uncover them. Things such as highly processed foods, food additives, a crease or seam in a piece of clothing that is putting pressure on the body, the internal chemistry being off caused by air pollution or the constant bombardment of plastic that comes from the food we wrap, store or cover with plastic. The chemicals in water, such as atrazine and fluoride. These are two of the most horrific toxins in our drinking water, and they are put there on purpose. Our music is on a 440 Hz, which is jarring. It was changed from a more perfect 432 Hz, or even 444 on purpose. Even words have energy in them.
Others stressors can include changes in weather, not understanding what is being said, not picking up on jokes or stories, feeling judged by parents, teachers, siblings, peers, feelings of inadequacy when told to be perfect at church, etc. Perhaps even a day of fun at something like an amusement park causes a meltdown when the day is over and the energy is gone.
Other stressors can be the people surrounding the HSP. Negative or positive people can have an impact on a HSP if the emotions are not identified as belonging to someone else and processed. Most children come into the world and immediately pick up the trauma and issues of the parents/guardians without realizing that the issues they face are not of their making. Regardless of the origin, taking steps to recognize the emotion and processing it is very beneficial. Even positive emotions need to be released. Imagine a light bulb, If you take paint and swipe it on the bulb for every emotion that you feel, over time, if not processed, these 'swipes' of emotion, good and bad, will cloud the light that comes from inside the bulb. We start acting and behaving according to the sticky-gooey emotions that have remained on the outside of the energy 'bulb' that we all are and we can't be ourselves at that point. We are literally acting out a strange mix other people's lives that have left their mark on us.
There are many ways to process the emotions we feel. More on that in the next episode. Stay tuned!
I've read enough of the opinions of 'experts' to know already that I disagree with a lot of the things they say. Please understand that I'm not an expert, and what I write is only my opinion. Feel free to disagree or come up with your own opinion, as your experience will probably differ from mine, or even the 'experts.'
I find that the differences between HSPs and empaths is a matter of training. And by that, I don't mean training to become an empath, but how to handle the physical, emotional and mental side effects of the condition.
Empathy is a totally natural state of human consciousness. Even animals have empathy. It is the ability to understand the pain and emotions of other people or life forms. It is how each person reacts to the information contained in that understanding that makes a highly sensitive person. I believe that many of the traits of a HSP come from a lack of understanding of triggers and learning how to deal with them. When the HSP starts in childhood to learn how to deal with the extremes of being an empath, life is much more manageable.
Children are not idiots! They can learn from a very young age how to get what they need or want, even if they (or the parents) are unaware that they are doing it. Even as children, we teach people how to treat us. If a child is not getting what they want, they will throw a fit, have a meltdown or a huge reaction to something that is unusual. In this way, the reaction of the people around them is what they are craving, and they have learned how to get it by the HSP behavior. Energy is a food that we take for granted and never talk about. Being an empath is like knowing how to bridge into someone else's emotional body and feel what they are feeling, in essence, energetically 'eating' their energy. The healthy thing to do after such an incident would be to disconnect the bridge and process the emotions of that other person. Who teaches you how to do that, especially when you are a child? Too often, we keep that bridge going because of the energetic payoff. It might be negative energy, but sometimes that is all the person's energy body wants.
This means that there are two types of empaths: those who can shut down this bridge and those who don't/won't. Processing? No one ever talks about that.
Take for example someone who loves speaking. They feed on the adulation of the audience, the oohs and aahs feed them energetically. Highly sensitive people might not know how to get the energy from other people that they crave in a way that is socially acceptable, so they find ways that bring that to them. Crying excessively, throwing tantrums, etc. Helping a HSP child to understand why they are behaving to the stress that they feel is tremendously helpful to the child and the parent/guardian.
Empaths are people who feel energy coming from other people, HSPs, in my opinion, are created when they are unable to shut down the connection to other people. Imagine what a tremendous load that can be when in a crowd of people, or just an accumulation of these connections. Too much stress and over time, they become more susceptible to many other little stressors that come along in life.
Things that I've found trigger a HSP are so mundane that sometimes HSPs don't realize that they get triggered by them. Some are so under the radar that it is hard to detect them, but it pays to become the detective in your own life and uncover them. Things such as highly processed foods, food additives, a crease or seam in a piece of clothing that is putting pressure on the body, the internal chemistry being off caused by air pollution or the constant bombardment of plastic that comes from the food we wrap, store or cover with plastic. The chemicals in water, such as atrazine and fluoride. These are two of the most horrific toxins in our drinking water, and they are put there on purpose. Our music is on a 440 Hz, which is jarring. It was changed from a more perfect 432 Hz, or even 444 on purpose. Even words have energy in them.
Others stressors can include changes in weather, not understanding what is being said, not picking up on jokes or stories, feeling judged by parents, teachers, siblings, peers, feelings of inadequacy when told to be perfect at church, etc. Perhaps even a day of fun at something like an amusement park causes a meltdown when the day is over and the energy is gone.
Other stressors can be the people surrounding the HSP. Negative or positive people can have an impact on a HSP if the emotions are not identified as belonging to someone else and processed. Most children come into the world and immediately pick up the trauma and issues of the parents/guardians without realizing that the issues they face are not of their making. Regardless of the origin, taking steps to recognize the emotion and processing it is very beneficial. Even positive emotions need to be released. Imagine a light bulb, If you take paint and swipe it on the bulb for every emotion that you feel, over time, if not processed, these 'swipes' of emotion, good and bad, will cloud the light that comes from inside the bulb. We start acting and behaving according to the sticky-gooey emotions that have remained on the outside of the energy 'bulb' that we all are and we can't be ourselves at that point. We are literally acting out a strange mix other people's lives that have left their mark on us.
There are many ways to process the emotions we feel. More on that in the next episode. Stay tuned!
