Mokokoma Mokhonoana's Blog: Essays by Mokokoma Mokhonoana - Posts Tagged "statistics"
Gone Too Soon
The death of a loved one alone is “painful” (or, so we are programmed). The death of a toddler hurts, for most, a couple of times more than that of an elderly.
The cause being that, I presume, we believe that being an elderly equals to having lived. Which is arguable. For there are, as we all know, 80-year-olds who have lived one year 80 times.
But that’s not what I would like to explore with this essay.
I am sure that we can all agree on the “Gone” part of the title of this essay; when it is used to refer to someone that is no more. It is the “Too Soon” that I’d like to address.
It is safe to presume that embedded within the “Too Soon” is the average lifespan of a human being. That is to say, “Too Soon” means “way before reaching the number of years that an average person is expected to live.”
(Keep the word “expected” in mind. It is the gist of my second point.)
This is yet another example of human beings being fooled by their tools.
Statistics are the underlying cause of our unenlightened usage of “Too Soon,” when referring to the death of a young one.
As a second point, I think that we are hurt, not by people, things, or, life, but by our expectations from people, things, or, life.
I am sure that the reader can see how this links with the previous point.
When a kid dies, we get hurt, not because they died (we all know that every living organism shares this destination), but because they died before reaching the “average” age that we expected them to reach.
It is mostly the realization that the grown-up that we hoped the kid will be, and, the things that we hoped the kid will accomplish, will never be … that causes us agony.
Logically, (ironically, by the aid of statistics), we all know that life inevitably gives birth to death. However, our blind reliance on statistics blinds our logical mind’s eyes.
(Within statistics lies an odd paradox. Statistics shows that an average person lives for, say, 70 years. While statistics shows that, in some cases, believing the previous statistic is misleading.)
Because of what statistics tells us (that an average lifespan is, say, 70 years), we call anything way below 70 years as “Too Soon” — and, at times, “unfair.”
We foolishly expect nature to work as per our desires and expectations.
Our being the cause of our suffering (through having expectations) isn’t limited to our relationship with death. Our relationship with others too brings us suffering … whenever those people do not do or behave as our expections.
More often than not, at the core of an about-to-be a divorcee’s hurting lies her having expected death to be the only thing that would lead to her losing her husband (“till death do us part?”).
To halve the number of times that you get hurt, halve the number of expectations that you have from people, things, or, life.
(Life is deadly. The second life is … death is inevitable.)
I guess, from the phrase “Gone Too Soon” one can presume that, once dead, those that have survived abortion are said to have “Lived Too Long.”
© Mokokoma Mokhonoana [ mokokoma.com + @mokokoma ]
The cause being that, I presume, we believe that being an elderly equals to having lived. Which is arguable. For there are, as we all know, 80-year-olds who have lived one year 80 times.
But that’s not what I would like to explore with this essay.
I am sure that we can all agree on the “Gone” part of the title of this essay; when it is used to refer to someone that is no more. It is the “Too Soon” that I’d like to address.
It is safe to presume that embedded within the “Too Soon” is the average lifespan of a human being. That is to say, “Too Soon” means “way before reaching the number of years that an average person is expected to live.”
(Keep the word “expected” in mind. It is the gist of my second point.)
This is yet another example of human beings being fooled by their tools.
Statistics are the underlying cause of our unenlightened usage of “Too Soon,” when referring to the death of a young one.
As a second point, I think that we are hurt, not by people, things, or, life, but by our expectations from people, things, or, life.
I am sure that the reader can see how this links with the previous point.
When a kid dies, we get hurt, not because they died (we all know that every living organism shares this destination), but because they died before reaching the “average” age that we expected them to reach.
It is mostly the realization that the grown-up that we hoped the kid will be, and, the things that we hoped the kid will accomplish, will never be … that causes us agony.
Logically, (ironically, by the aid of statistics), we all know that life inevitably gives birth to death. However, our blind reliance on statistics blinds our logical mind’s eyes.
(Within statistics lies an odd paradox. Statistics shows that an average person lives for, say, 70 years. While statistics shows that, in some cases, believing the previous statistic is misleading.)
Because of what statistics tells us (that an average lifespan is, say, 70 years), we call anything way below 70 years as “Too Soon” — and, at times, “unfair.”
We foolishly expect nature to work as per our desires and expectations.
Our being the cause of our suffering (through having expectations) isn’t limited to our relationship with death. Our relationship with others too brings us suffering … whenever those people do not do or behave as our expections.
More often than not, at the core of an about-to-be a divorcee’s hurting lies her having expected death to be the only thing that would lead to her losing her husband (“till death do us part?”).
To halve the number of times that you get hurt, halve the number of expectations that you have from people, things, or, life.
(Life is deadly. The second life is … death is inevitable.)
I guess, from the phrase “Gone Too Soon” one can presume that, once dead, those that have survived abortion are said to have “Lived Too Long.”
© Mokokoma Mokhonoana [ mokokoma.com + @mokokoma ]
Essays by Mokokoma Mokhonoana
(A selection of a few published writings by Mokokoma. For more writings: http://mokokoma.com)
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