In order to be trusted, you must be trustworthy. It is about not only what you do, but who you are.

Trust is built on dependability of a win-win relationship - that you would never do anything to your gain and my loss. Your behavior is driven by your principles - the decision rules you have learned throughout life so far. We learn our principles from family, culture, religion, law, school, teams, and the companies we work for.

We begin a relationship with alignment. The seller must match their body language, loudness, familiarity, humor, and dress to that of the buyer to prevent visual differences from interfering with our messages. The first decision a buyer makes is about the rep.

Next we move to rapport. Knowing their industry terms and best practices is a good start to relating to their problems. Consultative selling research tells us that the best salespeople are the best listeners not the best talkers. Focus on their need not your product.

As we demonstrate how we can understand and solve their problem better and with lower risk than the others, we start to build preference - to the point that they will tell us where we stand and what it would take to win.

Finally, we must deliver on our promises, perform to exceed expectations, and make our sponsors look good for recommending us. We must also bring value beyond just friendship - innovation, competitive advantage, customer satisfaction, or productivity.

When they start asking you questions about their own company, people, or industry trends then you have earned trusted advisor status. Never trade trust or quality for money, or after a while, you will have neither.