How to have Amazing Relationships
[image error]In our humanity, God wired us with this insatiable need for relationships.
When Adam and Eve were in the garden, God said it was not good for Adam to be alone. So God gave him Eve to be in a relationship.
Adam & Eve being removed from the garden caused their Vertical relationship with God to be broken.
When Adam & Eve’s vertical relationship was broken with God, their horizontal relationships were also broken in the process, as a result, mankind’s relationships have been challenged.
There are two things we know for sure:
We need relationships.
We can drive the people we love crazy at times.
So how do we play well with others? Can we have amazing relationships?
How To Have Amazing Relationships
Most of our problems in relationships starts with “Not” being good listeners.
The keys to amazing relationships are:
Be Quick to Listen
We believe we are listening to the other person when they are talking. But in reality, we listen with an answer ready at the first pause.
Some have called this type of listening “Response Ready Listening”.
To have amazing relationships we must:
Listen actively and attentively to the other person. This requires giving the other person our full attention, if we don’t listen attentively we risk misunderstanding what is being communicated.
Misunderstandings occur when we hear something the other person never said. This is often the root cause for most misunderstandings; something is heard that was never communicated. This is the leading cause of being “Offended”. Ineffective listening leads to a greater risk of being offended.
As we are listening to the other person, we must listen to the heart of the person.
What’s behind what’s being said?
Here is why this is important. You have heard this before, “Hurt people-Hurt people”. Most of us respond out of our “Hurts”.
To have amazing relationships we should “Be Quick to Listen”; therefore, being a good listener is a good start.
To have amazing relationships we should:
Be Slow to Speak
What does this mean? Being slow to speak means slowing down to process what has been said before we say anything. Slow down to think about your motives and think about the heart of the person. Before you speak ask yourself, “Am I speaking from just emotions; Is this the best time to say this”? When we are slow to speak it gives us time to think about what’s at stake.
Colossians 4:6 New Living Translation (NLT)
Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.
When we are “Slow to Speak” we give ourselves a better chance to respond correctly. We won’t always get it right, but we have a better chance if we take our time before responding.
This key is essential when responding in social media outlets. Before hitting send/publish we should slow down and re-read what we’re about to post.
When someone we love or have any kind of relationship with, posts something we don’t agree with wholeheartedly, we have to slow down and ask ourselves, “Is it best to pick up the phone to discuss this”? I know this is a novel idea, but yes it’s ok to pick up the phone and call someone to get clarity.
To have amazing relationships we should Be Quick to Listen, Slow to Speak; however, this next key is monumental to building amazing relationships.
The next key to Amazing Relationships:
Be Slow to Anger
When we are Quick to Listen and Slow to Speak, being Slow to Anger becomes possible.
One of the most impactful lessons I have learned is “Never make permanent decisions in an emotional state”. Anger is an emotion that must be harnessed and redirected.
When we respond from our hurts we “Return Hurt for Hurt”. Speaking to quickly leads to quick anger. The angrier we get, the faster we speak, and the less we hear.
The Marriage Graveyard, the Relationship Graveyard, The Sibling Relationship Graveyard are full because when we respond out of personal hurts, we then “Return Hurt for Hurt.
We can have amazing relationships – It’s a choice.
Prayer:
Pray that God gives you the eyes that see the best in people; a heart that forgives the worst in people; a mind that forgets the bad that has happened; and a soul that never loses faith in God.
Visit us at: http://igotvictory.com
To Subscribe and receive weekly updates Click here
Aalim has faithfully served in leadership roles with local churches in Arlington, Mansfield, Ft. Worth, and Desoto for over 20 years. Aalim has a strong entrepreneurial and corporate background that lends to his leadership skill and expertise. His passion to see people live in victory daily through the understanding and application of God’s Word is the driving force behind his desire to Pastor Victory Church.
The post How to have Amazing Relationships appeared first on Lay Me Down Ministries.
