People tend to believe that highly sensitive children or adults are only those who display their reactions to stimuli in the extreme. I believe there are more highly sensitive people out there who get a raw deal in this situation. They are the ones who feel the same intense emotions as the ones who quite vocally or physically demonstrate their feelings. They tend to become the shy, introverted loners who seldom get the spotlight that shines on those labeled as 'empathic' or 'highly sensitive.'

These people don't know how to talk to other people about what is going on, they are embarrassed or feel that no one would understand. And yet they are just as 'empathic.'

I was at a gathering a few days ago. There were adults and children. One of these children was described as 'our empathic one.' I didn't see her, I couldn't figure out which child it was. Could it be that she is only situationally sensitive? I say this because I did see a small boy, eyeing me, the newcomer to the group. He surreptitiously glanced at me three or four times that I noticed. And he was not 'the empathic' one.

Boys are often given the message that 'men don't cry' or men have to be tough. It sends a mixed message when some of these males of the community deeply feel what is going on. Law enforcement often puzzles over the 'nature over nurture' conundrum. Sometimes I think we totally overlook the role that society plays in stereotypical roles. Men have to be tough, they are ready to protect us, go to war to defend their country. Truly, unless the man is a psychopath and enjoys killing other people, the only other alternative is that the man is indeed a highly sensitive person and has a high degree of emotion in the matter of defending family, home and country.

Does it all start in childhood? Is it fair game to talk about emotions to those around us? We tend to shy away from topics like religion and politics, but we definitely avoid at all costs the topic of emotions about things that trigger the highly sensitive person.

You probably know a highly sensitive person that you didn't know is highly sensitive. Take another look at yourself, and others, and realize that people don't always show their emotions or how impacted they are by the same stimuli that has the 'empathic' one in tears.

Emotions are a tricky thing. And we all have them. If you aim for a tree, remember when you are in a forest.