Marcel: Another Year Without You
Another challenging year, another months, days, hours, and minutes and you were not here with me, and you never will be. And I needed you. Because these past twelve months were hard. Sometimes very hard. And I couldn’t hold you in my arms to find comfort in you.
It is selfish thinking, but everything about you is painted selfish. You were my world, nothing less than that.
***
Yesterday we had a serious talk with Saša about the possibility of putting you down. We have not talked to you about that, but somehow I feel you foresee it, that you have exposed us and that nothing remains hidden from you. You read all around you like X-rays, and stoically, calmly, and gracefully handle what is coming. I wish I could be brave like you and look death in the face with equal force and dignity. The hopelessness of your nonexistence, which covers me like a magician’s cloak, prevents me from that. Stealing me, stealing you. I do not agree to such a deal! As long as there is a fire in you for one more battle, as long as you do not say it’s over.
***
In Memoriam
Marcel
April 19, 2006–April 19, 2024
Please continue reading our true story, A World Without Color, as an eBook or a paperback.
Thank you.
BJ
bernardjan.com
Subscribe to my mailing list.
A World Without Color: A True Story of the Last Three Days with my Cat
It is selfish thinking, but everything about you is painted selfish. You were my world, nothing less than that.
***
Yesterday we had a serious talk with Saša about the possibility of putting you down. We have not talked to you about that, but somehow I feel you foresee it, that you have exposed us and that nothing remains hidden from you. You read all around you like X-rays, and stoically, calmly, and gracefully handle what is coming. I wish I could be brave like you and look death in the face with equal force and dignity. The hopelessness of your nonexistence, which covers me like a magician’s cloak, prevents me from that. Stealing me, stealing you. I do not agree to such a deal! As long as there is a fire in you for one more battle, as long as you do not say it’s over.
***
In Memoriam
Marcel
April 19, 2006–April 19, 2024
Please continue reading our true story, A World Without Color, as an eBook or a paperback.
Thank you.
BJ
bernardjan.com
Subscribe to my mailing list.
A World Without Color: A True Story of the Last Three Days with my Cat
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message 1:
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Jane
(last edited Apr 21, 2024 05:16AM)
(new)
Apr 21, 2024 05:16AM
It’s so so sad Bernard, but I understand. I’m on the same page as you my friend. It has been ten years for me without my precious Beamish. The comfort and love we receive from our pets is so humbling and special. Nothing can replace or equal that feeling, but we must go on and cope as best we can.
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Jane wrote: "It’s so so sad Bernard, but I understand. I’m on the same page as you my friend. It has been ten years for me without my precious Beamish. The comfort and love we receive from our pets is so humbli..."So true, Jane. Thank you for your words and empathy.
