What follows is the untold story of how the actor Joe Don Baker and the journalist Craig Modderno together saved James Bond, with me standing by, slack jawed.

Craig was, to vastly understate the case, a Hollywood character. In all my time in Los Angeles I never encountered anyone quite like him.

With his bird’s nest comb-over and a pasty face that had never seen sunlight, Craig lumbered along, a tall, overweight guy who looked as close to an unmade bed as I’ve ever seen. He lived in a hellhole West Hollywood apartment and drove a beaten-up old shitbox of a car that I was always amazed he could ever get started.

He seemed never to have heard that in order to keep his white shirts white, he had to separate them from the colors in his wash. His baggy jeans were constantly headed for his ankles. He was a vagabond journalist, a very good writer when he wasn’t pissing off his editors for constantly missing deadlines.

What set Craig apart, for me, were his eyes. They were the sharp sly eyes of the accomplished confidence man who knew the room and could play the odds.

Craig befriended me almost as soon as I got to Los Angeles. I quickly discovered that with his endless bravado, an inability to be embarrassed, using a little guile and the sort of authoritative voice that demanded attention, he could get himself in just about anywhere—often with me tagging along, complaining, “Craig, they’re not gonna let us in there, Craig…”

They almost always did.

I had no idea how he did it, but Craig managed to get us invited to a special sneak preview of the latest James Bond movie, GoldenEye.

This was the first public showing of the film. There was huge interest because after the series had lain dormant for several years, it was back starring Pierce Brosnan, making his debut as Agent 007.

Would it work? Would Brosnan and the director Martin Campbell bring new life to what had become a stale franchise? The stakes were high. The future of Bond was riding on GoldenEye.

Craig and I sat through the movie. When it was over, Craig said nothing. I followed him into the lobby. Across the way, Joe Don Baker appeared.

Baker had become famous as Sheriff Buford Pusser in Walking Tall. He had also co-starred in an earlier Bond Movie, The Living Daylights. In GoldenEye he was the chief Bond villain.

“I’m going over to talk to Joe Don,” announced Craig.

“Do you even know Joe Don?” I asked, trailing after him. I should have known better.

“Craig!” Joe Don Baker’s face lit up as Craig approached. “Good to see you, man.”

The two shook hands and Craig introduced me. Baker’s eyes were only for Craig. Hesitantly, he asked, “What did you think of the movie?”

Craig paused, deep in thought. Baker moved in closer, tensing. Craig looked at him and said, “The best Bond in years.”

Immediately, the actor’s florid face flooded with relief. “Jesus, you mean that? The best?”

“It’s terrific, Joe Don,” Craig went on. “Pierce is the best James Bond since Sean Connery.”

“Jesus, man,” Baker said. He whipped around to a baldheaded man standing a few feet away. “Martin,” he called. “Martin, come here, you gotta hear this.”

Martin turned out to be Martin Campbell, the director of the film.

“Martin,” Baker said. “Craig thinks the movie is the best Bond in years!”

It was Campbell’s turn to light up. “You do?”

“Pierce is the best Bond since Sean Connery,” repeated Craig.

“That’s wonderful!” enthused Campell.

He waved over a couple of people who turned out to be producers. Campbell had Craig repeat what he had told him. Everybody broke into big smiles, heartily shaking Craig’s hand. Their joy was palpable. You would think that no one before Craig came along had ever complimented them on the movie.

And maybe they hadn’t.

They group wandered off, practically floating, laughing and talking together. As he left Baker slapped Craig affectionately on the shoulder. “Thanks man,” he said happily. “You saved us, you really did.”

Who knew a badly dressed balding guy who could barely afford to pay for the night’s parking, would have such an effect on a group of high-powered Hollywood filmmakers? But that was Craig. I was in awe. GoldenEye, incidentally, became the big hit that revived the franchise.

I thought of that crazy night hearing the news of Joe Don Baker’s death at the age of eighty-nine.

Craig Modderno died of a heart attack in 2018. He’s in heaven, I’m sure of it.

He talked his way in.