A few years ago, I was back visiting Ireland. I was walking through a park near where I grew up. I was wearing this old jacket that was a bit too big for me. Out of nowhere, I experienced the sensation of being watched. I imagined how other people might see me in that park. A middle-aged anonymous bald guy who looked a bit scruffy .

This image of how other people saw me was so different from the image of how I saw myself. Which one was correct? Was I the main character in my own drama, or was I just some anonymous bald guy? Rather than that less flattering image disturbing me, it brought a sense of joy and relief. It is like my own self-image and this other image cancelled each other out. I could see clearly that I am not an image.

My self-image involved a perfection that I could never attain. This led to an almost constant state of seeking. The image created by the other was of just some random guy, not very interesting, one among billions. This certainly brought a sobering reflection on any grandiose ideas I might have.

And yet, it was so obvious that neither of these images captured what I was. My life is a process that could never be captured in any image. This is what is meant in Buddhism by no-self. A self is when we see ourselves as an image, it is when we see ourselves as an object, but we are not an object. We could never be captured in any image, we are an ever-changing process.

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