Norm Quotes

“Stop being okay with the norm, seek to transform.”
― Constance Chuks Friday

“Now domestication and sophistication of men by women are the norm and acceptable by society, but they are terrible for manhood.”
― Debasish Mridha M.D.

“In Debt, the anthropologist David Graeber tells the story of Tei Reinga, a Maori villager and “notorious glutton” who used to wander up and down the New Zealand coast, badgering the local fishermen by asking for the best portions of their catch. Since it’s impolite in Maori culture (as in many cultures) to refuse a direct request for food, the fishermen would oblige—but with ever-increasing reluctance. And so as Reinga continued to ask for food, their resentment grew until “one day, people decided enough was enough and killed him.”
This story is extreme, to say the least, but it illustrates how norm-following and norm-enforcement can be a very high-stakes game. Reinga flouted an important norm (against freeloading) and eventually paid dearly for it. But just as tellingly, the fishermen who put him to death felt so duty-bound by a different norm (the norm of food-sharing) that they followed it even to the point of building up murderous resentment. “Couldn’t you just have said no to Reinga’s requests?!” we want to shout at the villagers.”
― Kevin Simler, The Elephant in the Brain: Hidden Motives in Everyday Life

“When someone deviates from an accepted norm, they signal a gap in the system. A hole that hasn’t been plugged. The danger with exposing a foundation’s failings is it opens the door to the possibility that it’s a faulty structure altogether and should be torn down and built anew.”
― Romina Garber, Lobizona

“Almost everywhere people marry, monogamy is the official norm and infidelity the clandestine one.”
― Esther Perel, The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity

“Madness and sanity are judged by majority norms.”
― Adrian Tchaikovsky, Alien Clay

“To apply norm, soldiers needed.”
― Toba Beta, My Ancestor Was an Ancient Astronaut

“If "RACE" becomes the norm, then harmony will not prevail.”
― Henry Johnson Jr, Liberian Son

“We schamen ons natuurlijk niet om wat we doen, maar om de mogelijkheid dat dat wat we doen niet hoort. En terwijl nergens definitief vastligt hoe we horen te handelen, wekken we met ons schaamtevolle gedrag het bestaan van zo'n norm juist tot leven.”
― Coen Simon, Schuldgevoel

“Since when has bringing stolen money to churches for Pastor’s blessings become a Nigerian norm?”
― Sunday Adelaja

“Never repaired, his glasses looked as if they'd been thrown at his face, dirty grayish lumps of Reba's sticking plaster holding the frames together in a tentative accord with the forces of gravity.”
― T.C. Boyle, Drop City

“Because of the unlimited potential packed within each person, attaining greatness should have been the norm, not an oddity.”
― Assegid Habtewold, Soft Skills That Make or Break Your Success: 12 soft skills to master yourself, become a team player, and lead your company to absolute success

“A sweaty bum crack will become the norm in a climate changed world.”
― Steven Magee

“A norm doesn't have to be logical to exist in a civilized society, it just has to be non-prejudicial.”
― Abhijit Naskar, Neden Türk: The Gospel of Secularism

“To do good seemed to take a great deal of effort, like moving a mountain, while to do seemed easy.
Worse still, many people took evil as the expected norm - until it was publicly detected in the actions of the person in power. Then it was played up relentlessly till it was out of all proportion to reality. Often, the person involved was ruthlessly crushed as a fly under a sledge-hammer.”
― P.V. Narasimha Rao, The insider

“Not everyone can see the deeper dimensions lying behind things. Because they were not born with that eye. Their eyes were not designed for such usage. It is not the majority but always the minority who possess the ability to “see," perhaps only one person out of a thousand.”
― Sov8840

“Language has been weaponized in modern societies not just to communicate but to control thought. Terms like “success,” “confidence,” “normal,” “mental health,” or “self-improvement” are presented as universally desirable, but these words are saturated with invisible assumptions. When people use these terms, they are not merely communicating ideas but also adhering to a predefined set of beliefs and norms. For example, to say one is “successful” is not simply to express achievement but to buy into the societal belief that success is tied to specific metrics like wealth or social status. To use such language is already to submit to the ideology behind it.”
― Sov8840

“...and once people start to believe in these categories, their imagination becomes domesticated. Since capitalism doesn't only shape lives but also identities, they begin to critique themselves using the system’s own logic—feeling guilt for not being “productive,” anxiety for not being “attractive,” or shame for not being “confident and sociable.”
― Sov8840

“Normal people have nothing to forget, for they never even possess the ability to form memories—because they do not have an inner life to begin with.”
― Sov8840

“Questions like “Is this normal?” or “Am I weird?” reveal how deeply the concept of being “normal” is embedded in the subconscious of the ordinary majority. They don’t mean “Is this ordinary?” or “Am I a product of a photocopy?” when they ask these things, of course. In fact, they are not even consciously trying to conform to norms, even if their words might suggest otherwise. It is simply that they have internalized the association of the word “normal” with the idea of “good.”
― Sov8840

“As long as society continues to regard views that contradict the majority not as expressions of reality but merely as “different perspectives,” it will not mature.”
― Sov8840

“Any judgment born of collective agreement is, by nature, arbitrary, no matter how widely it is accepted.”
― Sov8840

“There exists a culture shared even by those who are dissatisfied with mass culture, and it is among the most dangerous precisely because it is dazzling—deceptive. It is a culture that belongs to those who are "dissatisfied with the world as it is." This manifests in the following ways: They still carry a certain belief and hope in humanity. If they suffer, they might dream that their suffering will one day “be heard by everyone.” Through their works, they may fantasize about becoming popular. They might romanticize the psychiatric term "trauma." They might aim to "fix and recover" things or people. They might set their minds on leaving a "meaningful impact" and become activists. They might frequently “discuss” on philosophy forums. They might be aiming at “dark vibes.” They might cling to mottos like “forever alone.” They might refer to themselves as "just a random book lover.” They might have interests in “just some random weird stuff.” They might still be screaming into the void. They might try to “prove their depth” publicly. They might refer to themselves as "lost souls" to the point of weariness, even internalizing this very term—coined by the system to reduce by classifying them—implying a form of domesticated rebellion. And so on. These supposed outsiders are actually on the inside, worshipping at the altar of visibility, validation, and vague worldly hope. Their beliefs—“art-as-cure,” “literature-as-refuge,” “activism-as-purpose”—are not radical to the point of exile but packaged and predictable. They don't reject the system; they only ask to be understood within its boundaries. They weep, but with an eye to applause. They write, but always with a publisher in mind. They compose, but just to make money. They mourn, but only to be noticed. They claim detachment, but still speak as if begging to be liked and heard. They imagine themselves as “wild,” but only within the categories that subcultures and language allow. After all, there are two ends to the ruins: on one end, these kinds of “loners” who are still tied to conventional wisdom; and on the other, the utterly unknown, mystic, cosmic, and free spirits who have transcended everything human.”
― Sov8840