Speaker Geeks! discussion
Ethical Debates
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Public Humiliation as a Form of Punishment
Nope. Think old school 'you're grounded' is an acceptable solution...Although my parents never let me go through any wear and tear as they were without any hard and fast rules....
Criminals are mostly murex shelled lol; public humiliation would just amuse them because of the attentions....
H99 wrote: "Somnipotent wrote: "Criminals are mostly murex shelled lol; public humiliation would just amuse them because of the attentions...."Probably. :P It might work on some, though, if they're the arrog..."
Even confined walls of penitentiary and the segregation chambers aren't enough to shake them. Saw on a documentary that one of felons did buncha petty crimes just to come to prisons to meet his friends....
I can't believe this is even a debate. Humiliation solves nothing. Guilt, not embarrassment, should be the means to making amends. By humiliating someone you are instilling a sense of fear of consequences rather than ingraining a sense of moral behavior.
H99 wrote: "Somnipotent wrote: "H99 wrote: "Somnipotent wrote: "Criminals are mostly murex shelled lol; public humiliation would just amuse them because of the attentions...."Probably. :P It might work on so..."
Some random prison and some random felons and a tattooed tatted bloke with a wannabe smile of cool hand Luke...
They don't care if they die as one said; it's just that they don't have any reason to die as long as they are on a free meal; when you're beyond dead the prison toughies are just perks and goodies in a hamper...Our logic wont apply to most of them...
There was this old sturdy looking guy in that documentary who only cared about his new sneakers he got as a labor perk. He got stabbed but he didn't care about his wounds; all he cared about not soiling his sneakers with blood. It was a sad thing to watch. These little things complete them whether they die with it but it being pure. Reminded me of the movie 'Cast Away'...Wilson!
H99 wrote: "✿.Ⓐⓟⓞⓞⓡⓥⓐ.✿ wrote: "I can't believe this is even a debate. Humiliation solves nothing. Guilt, not embarrassment, should be the means to making amends. By humiliating someone you are instilling a se..."Mhmm.
Humiliating your own children to teach them a lesson proves how lousy you yourself are... Those children who are arrogant and behaves such a way to get punishments somehow shows that something went wrong while parenting... If you need to humiliate your child to teach them a lesson then it means you are not doing a proper job of being a parent. What if the grandparents of the child who is being humiliated use the same technique with parents because even they did wrong by humiliating their child in public how would they feel ? Every parent is a daughter or son at one point of time and they does the same thing what all teenagers do so they should think twice before giving punishments because it reflects your own nature and poor judgement.
You cannot no matter what humiliate your child as a form of punishment.
i love it rather thn hitting humiliation works faster . i know it feel gross humiliating your own child publicly but if it works in better for the child i ll use it and it is not harming them it is same like when your teacher makes you stand in the corner in front of whole class and you feel ashamed and it works
So what you mean to say is , if for your mistake your parents choose to humiliate you in front of everyone you would like it ? Don't you think it will increase the distance between the child and the parent. Shaming your child for silly reason is no good way to teach your child a lesson. They are teenagers, and that is the time when they either build self esteem and respect. Doing this will give them bad example of authority and they will use the same way in future and maybe they take more drastic steps in humiliating because psychologically this kind of punishment often leaves scars which cannot be seen but felt. It is no better than hitting. So you would say it is ok if a teacher hit in class because that might teach the child manners ?
Shaming someone doesn't work but making them realize their mistake does..... It is often proven that most of the times instead of brutal punishments , a mere talk can change the mind of your child. You sshould just know how to convince them that you are friend of your child and not enemy. This is a tender age and the parents should handle it carefully because this age makes or breaks your own child. And remember what you give you receive. So always be a role model for your children so that when they are parents they say, " I will care for my child the way my parents did" and not "I will never do what my parents did with me".
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i love it rather thn hitting humiliation works faster . i know it feel gross humiliating your own child publicly but if it works in better for the child i ll use it and it is not harmi..."and do what , try to make them understand and they will understand ,right ,oh forget it , they'll think we can do anything whatever we want, if i wont stop my child doing wrong, he will eventually lead a life of low self esteem or else i can stop happening it by giving some little shame
Kate wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i love it rather thn hitting humiliation works faster . i know it feel gross humiliating your own child publicly but if it works in better for the child i ll use it and it is not harmi..."humiliation is humiliation either it is in classroom or outside you don't know how much it effect a child when he stands in corner that is why it is punishment
H99 wrote: "Kate wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i love it rather thn hitting humiliation works faster . i know it feel gross humiliating your own child publicly but if it works in better for the child i ll use it and it..."they are some bad examples for everything,it is always how use it ,i wont let my child stand alone i will stand by him and keep saying "pls don't do it again" ill embarrass myself too bcoz parents are also somehow responsible for their child's doing
Shame-induced punishments are not going to solve the problem. If anything, they will lower a child's self-esteem and teach them not to go to their parents when they have an issue or have done something wrong. It's a good way to create a barrier between a child and the parent.
i know kids are human being and so are parents too , they will not do not anything to harm their child but there is no harm in teaching a Little lesson, parents who take little far are crazies and they are rareand there is no shame in accepting your mistake
Kate wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Kate wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i love it rather thn hitting humiliation works faster . i know it feel gross humiliating your own child publicly but if it works in better for the child i ll ..."there is no shame in accepting your mistake in front of everyone
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i know kids are human being and so are parents too , they will not do not anything to harm their child but there is no harm in teaching a Little lesson, parents who take little far are..."if your parents trying to make you understand something it means they are idiots you are talking like they are some demons , i am sure if we leave some bad example every parents who give this kind of punishment , it is always last option for them , if my kid is a drug dealer i'll do anything to make it right
i will not give this kind of punishment for not doing homework or fighting in school
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Kate wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Kate wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i love it rather thn hitting humiliation works faster . i know it feel gross humiliating your own child publicly but if it works in ..."i listen to my parents when they say something but that doesn't mean they are always right but most of the time they are
if my kid is a drug dealer i'll do anything to make it rightGood luck with that....
Slap a kid for smoking; that'll make the kid smoke behind your back; even start using drugs because parents humiliated her/him. Or probably kill himself...
You can only give advice to your kids, friendly advice while taking care of them; in extreme cases ground them for a week or take some privileges like 'you can't use Internet for 10 days'. Anything rough; you're straight up a bad parent. And it's not an opinion. After kid turns 18 you can't do shit about it anyways...so be a friend, not a jerk.
Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i know kids are human being and so are parents too , they will not do not anything to harm their child but there is no harm in teaching a Little lesson, parents who take li..."If you have noticed the links provided in this arguments at the start. The kids aren't drug dealers, nor criminals Infact one girl is mere 13 years of age. You will resort to such thing to your 13 years old when you know this might break their self esteem ?
When a kid, I mean literally Kid does something wrong the parents normally shouts saying " NO, YOU SHOULDN'T DO THIS" or "DON'T YOU EVER DO IT AGAIN" then, the kid is most likely either stop trying new things or becomes a rebel at such tender age. It is not me saying but it is the psychological aspect of a child. Even parents need awareness regarding parenting. Just because they are parents, they doesn't qualify for humiliating their child.
The basic of one's nature is built in tender age of 4-5. During that age the way they are nurtured shape there nature. In that age a child tries new things by touch , see and hear. And that is for life. If they are groomed well they become a better person but if they aren't they tend to become a troublesome teen.
My, main point here is it is parents who are responsible for the behavior of children and a 13 year old or more does not deserve this kind of punishment. Infact punishment doesn't solve anything it creates more problems.
When a child is punished in school by standing in corner or by any other means the child doesn't learn to do right by that second stage of punishment but he/she learns is the only way to make someone understand is by punishing them.
When a child is punished at home, the child doesn't become a better person but it infact nails his/her theory about punishments. That is why we have so many parents who resort to punishments. Now, many psychologists social workers are spreading awareness in parents by workshops regarding parenting. They are taught that we should never tell a child no don't do this... Instead we should tell them the pros and cons of it, and help the child understand the bad side of it by giving them a chance of choice. They will surprise you by choosing right most of the time. If they don't try again till they understand the benefits of good over bad and it will strengthen the relationship of parents and child, so, when, a child becomes a teen they are confident enough to choose right over wrong and if they did choose wrong help them again in seeing them the right over wrong by being their friends.
give this kind of punishment for grades doesn't make sense but still its not wrong,becoz eventually child needs to pass his exam if he is not listening , i got to do something.it doesn't make sense don't do anything to your child becoz he'll commit suicide but let him be a drunk and addicted teenager.
you all are saying don't hurt your child it will effect psychologically but if i know that this will help my child ill do anything, i will try to give a better life to him anyhow, rather then letting him choose the wrong one , it will give me satisfaction that i tried and in future i wont listen crap like "my parents didn't tried
becoz they were afraid that ill commit suicide and now what i am gonna do "
Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i know kids are human being and so are parents too , they will not do not anything to harm their child but there is no harm in teaching a Little lesson, parent..."being friend doesn't work always and as i said earlier this kind of punishment is always last option
Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i know kids are human being and so are parents too , they will not do not anything to harm their child but there is no harm in teaching a Littl..."If being friends doesn't work then what is the guarantee that punishment will work just fine ?
Reminding again these who were punished weren't drinkers or something .... But got punishment for silly reason like grades......
All I can say, It's just sad people still think like that. We can't do anything about it though (through proper reasoning at least), but hoping that physical and psychological humiliation towards children should be made illegal in such countries (which is on the process through ongoing global initiatives, yay!). Humans should be treated with respect and dignity, that involves kids too, in fact, most primarily. These types of punishments legitimacy is enough to pave way for the lucidity of hailing intense parental oppression, damaging the parent-child relations; inducing bitterness, hatred and depression in the child towards parents and the world.
In this raging generation of information you're just couple of clicks away from educating yourself, that why this is unacceptable. "Or" you can ignore all this and go ahead humiliate/beat your kid up while making excuses that 'you ran out of other options' every time; and don't whinge when all these punishments fail on a crippled run and the table turns when you grow old. Just a matter of time...
alex {stay strong and ignore bullies} wrote: "no it sucks when i was younger (10) i was buing some food and my parents opleneley talked and yells at me "no wonder your so fat every time we go out you buy food and stuff into you mouth your not ..."they were right obesity is worst nightmare you can have, just a box of disease there intentions were right if they would have not stopped you, your friends will be mocking at you and calling you fatty and all and trust me an outsider humilatting you in public is much worse thn parents
Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i know kids are human being and so are parents too , they will not do not anything to harm their child but there is no harm in tea..."what i was trying to say was that i will try everything which is in my child best ,if it is in being friend thn i ll be friend and if its in humiliation thn ...
and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least pass them
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "give this kind of punishment for grades doesn't make sense but still its not wrong,becoz eventually child needs to pass his exam if he is not listening , i got to do something.it do..."
nothing but at least it will give me a satisfaction that i tried
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "i know kids are human being and so are parents too , they will not do not anything to harm their child but there is no harm in tea..."never said it is a best way but it is a way and we should not eliminate it
whatever way a parent use to teach something there will be consequences , they cant sit back and do nothing for that
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "alex {stay strong and ignore bullies} wrote: "no it sucks when i was younger (10) i was buing some food and my parents opleneley talked and yells at me "no wonder your so fat every tim..."you are seeing this comment as in said with rage and anger and i am seeing this comment said in a mood of fun where parents teaching something and making it funny
and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least pass them Yes...it is a silly reason... Instead of saying don't worry appear again and this time I will help you my dear daughter... THAT HELPS
And I don't believe whole life depends on failing exam.... We learn from our mistakes...abd those who help us in our bad times...are true..parents...
You can appear again and again ... Don't you think failure is enough of a humiliation and top that parents behave such a way proves why the child failed in the first place...
Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least pass them Yes...it is a silly reason... Instead of findi..."
and appear how many time what if that child failed his or her exam bcoz he or she was watching movie with his or her girlfriend or boyfriend
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "alex {stay strong and ignore bullies} wrote: "no it sucks when i was younger (10) i was buing some food and my parents opleneley talked and yells at me "no won..."you can't be sure it wasn't funny and alex also said that it worked
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "alex {stay strong and ignore bullies} wrote: "no it sucks when i was younger (10) i was buing some food and my parents opleneley talke..."parents doesn't bully you becoz they don't like you ,it is in to do best for you
Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least pass them Yes...it is a silly reason... ..."
Anuj... A 13 yr old... ? Just for once Think About it... A 13 yr old failed... She will be condemned by teachers already then her friends... She doesn't need same thing from parents..why people think if someone failed it's because he or she was with "boyfriend/girlfriend"
Failure has many reasons.. and if for once we go according to what you say then also... If a 13 yr old is watching movies with her "boyfriend" then I must ask...what was parents doing at that time ?
If a parent is in accord with the academics of children helping in assignments , guiding in projects ...keeping tabs on exams...which child will fail ?
But those parents who resort to punishments are normally those who are only interested in results and nothing else...
H99 wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least pass them Y..."
Welcome.... I personally think...those parents who resort to punishment have rooted in their brain that punishment solve everything... Or are those parents who just want their child to succeed and not flourish... What do you think... ?
Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least pass them Yes...it is a sil..."
you said when that child was watching movie what were parents doing, it will be acceptable to you when they'll stop him from doing that any how ,you want them to stop their child doing wrong an when they do they are bullying their children
and i said suppose that kid failed his exam bcoz he was watching movie with her girlfriend, i didn't said that kid has dyslexia , no parent is that much stupid who will punish his sick child. i dont even think theyll punish their child without giving advice.
who said a child needs to ace all subjects but we still need to passed them to go in next standard. it is education system even i appose that bcoz it doesn't make your child educated but still we need to follow it
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "alex {stay strong and ignore bullies} wrote: "no it sucks when i was younger (10) i was buing some food and m..."and it can vice versa of it .every parents is not a bully
H99 wrote: "Purvika wrote: "H99 wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects..."this time i am with you even i don't believe in mugging and passing the exam but it is a system no matter how it is but we need to follow it
Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least pass them Y..."
You are not getting my point here... All I an saying is , if from start parents show interest in childs academics then the child is less likely to fail. But now a days most parents are so engrossed in their own life that they only care about the results and not the reason.
Stopping your child from watching movies...by saying "you can watch movie after exam now study" is not bullying...and neither they are humiliating their child... But making a child hold poster after they get grades... In front of all... Is bullying... What they gonna prove... What will they achieve.. ? Satisfaction ? That they did something...
Where were the parents when the child was preparing for exam... ?
Many reasons for failure includes... Child not concentrating : parents should be aware that their children aren't concentrating in studies....
Child have some issues with parents: when parents are more into punishments and less caring , children tend to lose interest in everything and becomes depressed.
Some sickness : again parents should be aware of the sickness and if they are aware shouldn't pressurise the child to write exam.
Stress : when there is problem in family the most who get effected are children and thus can't keep their mind straight while studying.
All these conclusions says that parents should be more into what is going on in the life of their child then just giving punishments....
I think that public humiliation as a form of punishment is wrong. There's a line when punishing your children, and this definitely crosses it. The punishment of children for doing something wrong should be between the parents and the child and nobody else.
Sierra wrote: "I think that public humiliation as a form of punishment is wrong. There's a line when punishing your children, and this definitely crosses it. The punishment of children for doing something wrong s..."Totally agree.....
Purvika wrote: "Many reasons for failure includes... Child not concentrating : parents should be aware that their children aren't concentrating in studies....
Child have some issues with parents: when parents ..."
all you are saying that parents who give punishment are those who don't care about their kids , and i am saying parents who punishment are not always wrong when some parents approach these kinds of punishment it doesn't that they are horrible parents, they must have their reasons for choosing these kinds of punishment
Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace all the subjects but at least p..."i tried everything to stop my child from watching movies in exam time but he is not listening to me now what i should do just sit back and do nothing , kids can be kids, but parents should not be parents right
but if i choose some harder way and if it makes my child life thn why shouldn't i approach it, bcoz for a lifetime he will curse me ,thn i am a coward
H99 wrote: "I would have replied, but Purvika said everything.Dyslexia is not a sickness, though."
okkk
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "I would have replied, but Purvika said everything.Dyslexia is not a sickness, though."
okkk"
Dyslexia is "a general term for disorders that involve difficulty in learni..."
got you but what i know about it is that it makes difficult to study
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not saying you should ace al..."no the sole purpose is not to humiliate but to make them understand that you were wrong any kind of punishment parents choose is not becoz they don't like their kids it is bocz they care about them ,you are right kids can be kids ans that is why as a parents it is their duty to make them understand that they are wrong , anyhow
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Many reasons for failure includes... Child not concentrating : parents should be aware that their children aren't concentrating in studies......"
i think both should stand, pregnant girl and the boy they were both together in this but apparently no i don't think any parent would do that
H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "H99 wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "Anuj wrote: "Purvika wrote: "and failing your exams is not a silly reason your whole life depends on it , i am not..."you are right
reason shouldn't becoz "i say so"
Anuj wrote: "alex {stay strong and ignore bullies} wrote: "no it sucks when i was younger (10) i was buing some food and my parents opleneley talked and yells at me "no wonder your so fat every time we go out y..."Oh. My Gosh. I didn't see this until just now, and you have no idea how much that hurts not only me, but other people as well. I can't even believe you said that.
Humiliation is a..."
This. It's also lazy parenting, like hitting some kind of "Auto" button and just letting everyone that passes by punish the child rather than you, the one who is supposed to be teaching them right from wrong.