Elodie

“My epiphany has been that none of you deserve me. You can look. You can fantasize. Like I've had to. Try to bring home a woman, and I'll make farting noises while wearing a dolphin costume and acting like I'm humping each of you. See how long you can hold an erection then.”
― Kristy Cunning, Four Psychos

“Jude finally pushes off, turns on his heel, and stalks out, yelling behind him, “I can’t handle her right now. Someone else make her stop being ridiculous so I can effectively yell at her some more!”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“I hear something crash to the ground, something else shatter, and four angry Horsemen shouting very not nice words about me. “I’m going to fucking kill her myself, damn it!” “For fuck’s sake, she’s going to drive us all insane!” “When I get my hands on her…” “We need to find a way to chain her to the fucking house!” Sheesh. They act like they like me, but I think they’ve just missed threatening me.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“Jude is the only one awake. He never really slept as deeply as the other three, and I’m fairly sure he resents the hell out of all of them for sleeping as well as they have. And he resents me for my wicked vagina voodoo. My milkshake brings all the boys to naptime…Yeah, that’s not how that song goes. The song is a lot sexier, but beggars can’t be choosers.”
― Kristy Cunning, Three Trials