Tim Robinson

“...trapped in a submarine with an armadillo.”
― Kate DiCamillo, Franklin Endicott and the Third Key

“I suppose it only makes good sense that you can feel better about yourself by letting someone cut up your face...”
― Jim Benton, My Pants Are Haunted

“Murders one thing, but you can't go around kicking cats.”
― Beth Lincoln, A Dictionary of Scoundrels

“Wait," I gurgled, pivoting his delivery leeward. "That's not the newspaper. The sign says Philadelphia Art Museum." There was by then a clanging report as the errant brick smashed with major league velocity into a bronze statue that graced the museum's green lawn, severing the masterpiece's nose like a no-frills rhinoplasty.
"Hey," I bellowed, surveying the damage. "Look what you did to Sylvester Stallone.”
― Woody Allen, Zero Gravity