Paul Mathews's Blog

Greetings, Goodreaders

I'm not sure if anyone will ever read this blog post, but I'm going to write it anyway.

Just a quick message to let you know that I've recently published a new novel - a comedy science-fiction tale in 42 chapters entitled Terry From Another Dimension.

It should be right up your galactic street if you're a fan of Douglas Adams and The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

If you fancy some futuristic fun, please give it a try. It's currently available as an eBook from Amazon (with a paperback due in a few weeks).

That's all, folks. I have to go off and discover the answer to life, the universe and everything before teatime.

Happy reading!

To celebrate its 5th birthday, We Have Lost The President, my debut comedy-thriller novel set in a 2040s British Republic, is now available to download FREE from Amazon until Tuesday 3rd August. Other titles in the five-book series are also discounted in the US and UK. This offer probably won't be repeated until the 2040s, so please take advantage of it. Happy reading ... and don't lose it!

Link: https://getbook.at/MyAmazon

Greetings, comedy-fiction fans. This is just a quickie to let you know that The Royal Wedding Saboteurs has now been added to Goodreads. It's the sequel to An Accidental Royal Kidnap and the eBook is available to pre-order at a discount price until publication day on 18 June 2021. Feel free to add to your 'To Read' lists or just completely ignore it - preferably the former. There will be at least one more book in the Royally Funny series which will be out in the autumn. After that, possibly something completely different in 2022 (all three of my series are unlike each other, I think you'll agree, and my fourth series won't break that tradition!). Stay safe and keep reading!

Best wishes

Paul M

Just to alert the few hardy souls who follow me on the Goodreads platform: all but my most recent novel are available to read for free for subscribers to Kindle Unlimited (KU).

My first novel We Have Lost The President is still very popular on KU and its four sequels are also being borrowed. If you're wondering, I receive a tiny amount for each page read. So, the longer the book, the bigger the payout if you read it to the end..! :-) And, at around 100,000 words, 'We Have Lost The President' is the longest book I've written (and ever will write!). Nowadays, I average about 70,000 words although it depends on the story.

Not everyone likes to read on a Kindle or e-reader. That's why all my novels are now available as high-quality paperbacks which are printed to order. Yes - if you order one copy, Amazon just prints one copy! I've sold a few over Christmas, so some people definitely prefer a book in their hand - probably because we have so much screen time these days.

Anyway, enjoy the holiday period and I'll try and blog a little more in 2021.

Best wishes

Paul Mathews

After nine months of hard work, my royal baby was delivered today at midnight (to your Kindle if you pre-ordered it). Its full name is An Accidental Royal Kidnap and it weighs approximately 400g (the paperback version does anyway). Father and baby are doing very well. If you wish to see the gorgeous little chap, you can visit him here: viewbook.at/TowerOfAmazon

The novel is the first in my Royally Funny Books series and is written entirely from the point of view of the main character: 39-year-old, recently dumped, London schoolteacher George Nearly - a man who wakes up one Sunday morning to find a princess on his rug.

There's a two-week blog tour starting on Mon 30 Nov, so we shall see what bookworms across the UK think of my efforts. Hopefully, they'll give it their royal seal of approval.

Anyway, one cordially invites you to buy and read the novel and, if you enjoy it, leave a review on Goodreads and Amazon. One would be most obliged. Thank you!

Finally, God save all of you who buy a copy! ;-)

It gives one great pleasure to announce that one's next novel is a British comedy romp with a regal theme. An Accidental Royal Kidnap is set in modern-day London and stars London schoolteacher George Nearly and the world's most unpredictable royal, Princess Araminta of Essex - who he finds one morning sprawled on his favourite rug.

The first in the Royally Funny Books series, the eBook is available to pre-order now from Amazon at viewbook.at/TowerOfAmazon

One will be posting an extract later this month, so stay tuned.

And finally, God save the author! :-)

After five years of writing some of the funniest eBooks ever to grace a Kindle reading device (at least, that's what my Mum says), I've finally joined the pre-digital age. Paperbacks are now available from Amazon for my Clinton Trump Detective Genius trilogy: A Very Funny Murder Mystery, The Blood Moon of Doom and To Kill A Shocking Bard.

The books are sturdy, fine-looking 6 x 9 inch specimens with elegant spines, easily-turnable pages and superb ISBN numbers. And they don't require batteries or need to be charged. They are ideal for propping up wobbly tables, swatting flies or, if you need a giggle, you can even read them.

Paperbacks for my We Have Lost series are also in the pipeline - hopefully sometime in late July / early August - and all my future comedy masterpieces will also be out in paperback.

I shall leave you to recover from this wonderful news and keep my fingers crossed that somebody actually buys one.

Best wishes

Paul Mathews

Dear Goodreaders

I have no idea if anyone ever reads this blog but typing it out will fill a few minutes while my salmon cooks in the oven, so here we go.

I have just published the third and final installment of my 'Clinton Trump Detective Genius' trilogy, entitled To Kill A Shocking Bard. If you're a lover of great comedy and awful poetry, it's the eBook for you.

While you're here, the first title in the series, A Very Funny Murder Mystery, is discounted to $0.99 / £0.99 on Amazon until Wed 6 May 2020. During the same period, my entire five-novel 'We Have Lost' series is also half-price ($2.99 / £2.99). That's a saving of $20 / £20 if you buy all the eBooks - and that's a lot of toilet rolls, people.

There's more info about my novels on my website at https://quitefunnyguy.com Please take a look around and sign up for my newsletter (or I'll get really upset).

Stay safe and be careful out there.

Best wishes

Paul Mathews

The second novel in my new 'Clinton Trump Detective Genius' series has now been added to Goodreads (by me, in case you're wondering!).

The new novel is entitled The Blood Moon Of Doom and sees South East England's greatest detective investigate the death of celebrity astronomer Edwin Bubble, who's found battered to death by his own telescope. It includes lots of characters from the first book and a few new ones, such as Clinton's over-protective mother Dorothea and Brokenshire observatory owner Sir Brivan Hoverton.

'The Blood Moon Of Doom' will be published as an e-book on 28 Feb 2019 on Amazon, Kobo, the Apple Bookstore and Barnes & Noble.

If anyone has any questions about it, leave a comment and I'll be happy to respond.

Best wishes

Paul Mathews

The first e-book in my new Clinton Trump Detective Genius series is now available to purchase and read. Woo-hoo! It's a slighty different genre to the 'We Have Lost' series (which I describe as comedy-thriller) as it's a classic murder-mystery spoof, but it's still predominantly a British comedy.

It's set in the village of Upper Goosing - European Murder Destination of the Year 2015 - and stars self-proclaimed genius Detective Inspector Clinton Trump - a man who shuns logic, breaks protocol and relies on his gut instincts (remind you of anyone?!).

You can view it on your local Amazon store here: viewbook.at/YourAmazonStore

It's also available from Kobo, the Apple bookstore, Barnes & Noble and other outlets.

Happy detecting!

Best wishes

Paul Mathews