Monika Basile's Blog: Confessions of a Bleeding Heart - Posts Tagged "joy"
Tune In...
We are odd people in this home. Not just because I say it, because most who visit agree and either one of two things happen; either they join in with our bizarre shenanigans and eventually find them to be our version of “normal, or they never come back.
I shall pick one instance to give a glimpse of the real live life we lead. Our television viewing habits are a good example. Until recently, we watched a T.V. that the top six inches were wavy lines. They also made the picture upside down from those six inches up. We watched anyway even though it was sometimes in color, sometimes not, sometimes loud and sometimes silent. And when others came, “How can you possibly watch this T.V.?” is exclaimed with surprise. Well we did...until I finally broke down this spring and bought a new one.
And still the television issue is prevalent in our household. Most days we don’t turn the volume up and we watch a silent spattering of images and wonder out loud what in the world is going on. It is to the point that most of the time, as we talk over the T.V. we hardly realize we don’t even have the volume on at all until someone says, “Why are you watching this without the sound?” I know this is annoying to most folks, but we are used to it and it doesn’t faze us.
Recently, one of the kids friends came, (he is a brave one and has repeatedly come back)We all were in a lengthy discussion and something interesting flashed across the screen. “Oh wow! I wonder what’s going on?” and we all began chatting over whatever appeared to be happening across the screen. After some time, I finally said, “You know, we could turn up the volume and see what is actually happening.” And it’s funny, I don’t remember what was so all important, only our excited chatter about what MIGHT be happening.
I know even thinking about that would send some in a tizzy or fit, yet for us, and the lasting people in our lives, it is as it usually is, it is the our strange normal life.
Some days we watch the blue screen. It is the background of our lives. Why do we not turn it off? Or when the DVD is done playing it will song the opening “play” scene for hours on end before someone bothers to change it or turn it off or watch the movie over. We watch the Hispanic channels, though none of us speaks Spanish, and make up stories about what is going on.
I am thinking maybe we are a little more interested in each other than what is out there in T.V. land. I am not against television in the least bit. I actually thought it was invented just for me when I was a kid. I didn’t realize folks saw the same thing as me inside of that box. I thought the performers lived only to entertain me and waited inside for me to be allowed to turn the television on. I am simply assuming that our wonder and curiosity are near as big as our imaginations. And maybe, maybe we are just weird.
Monika M. Basile
I shall pick one instance to give a glimpse of the real live life we lead. Our television viewing habits are a good example. Until recently, we watched a T.V. that the top six inches were wavy lines. They also made the picture upside down from those six inches up. We watched anyway even though it was sometimes in color, sometimes not, sometimes loud and sometimes silent. And when others came, “How can you possibly watch this T.V.?” is exclaimed with surprise. Well we did...until I finally broke down this spring and bought a new one.
And still the television issue is prevalent in our household. Most days we don’t turn the volume up and we watch a silent spattering of images and wonder out loud what in the world is going on. It is to the point that most of the time, as we talk over the T.V. we hardly realize we don’t even have the volume on at all until someone says, “Why are you watching this without the sound?” I know this is annoying to most folks, but we are used to it and it doesn’t faze us.
Recently, one of the kids friends came, (he is a brave one and has repeatedly come back)We all were in a lengthy discussion and something interesting flashed across the screen. “Oh wow! I wonder what’s going on?” and we all began chatting over whatever appeared to be happening across the screen. After some time, I finally said, “You know, we could turn up the volume and see what is actually happening.” And it’s funny, I don’t remember what was so all important, only our excited chatter about what MIGHT be happening.
I know even thinking about that would send some in a tizzy or fit, yet for us, and the lasting people in our lives, it is as it usually is, it is the our strange normal life.
Some days we watch the blue screen. It is the background of our lives. Why do we not turn it off? Or when the DVD is done playing it will song the opening “play” scene for hours on end before someone bothers to change it or turn it off or watch the movie over. We watch the Hispanic channels, though none of us speaks Spanish, and make up stories about what is going on.
I am thinking maybe we are a little more interested in each other than what is out there in T.V. land. I am not against television in the least bit. I actually thought it was invented just for me when I was a kid. I didn’t realize folks saw the same thing as me inside of that box. I thought the performers lived only to entertain me and waited inside for me to be allowed to turn the television on. I am simply assuming that our wonder and curiosity are near as big as our imaginations. And maybe, maybe we are just weird.
Monika M. Basile
Cookies and Beans
There was a time when I was a young mother that we had very little—little enough that a church basket gave both the feeling of humiliation and utter gratefulness.
Inside the basket were your typical items; a few cans of green beans and corn, instant potatoes, gravy mix, a ham etc., and something extraordinary—a bag of Oreo cookies. Oreo’s had always been and are my favorite. I remember holding them and trying to figure out when the last time I had one was and I couldn’t recall it. I was grateful for every bit of food that was given, but I was in wonder over the kind soul who thought to put an indulgence in a donation basket. I was incredulous to think that someone actually considered that even people coming from a place of need are deserving of some indulgence and they are deserving of our best.
I am thankful I have learned that lesson early on. I am grateful too that I have witnessed this phenomenon in others.
A woman once told me a story of her father, and how her brothers and she had given him a beautiful cashmere coat for Christmas. The father saw a homeless man on the street. He pulled that coat from his shoulders and wrapped it around the man. The children were all upset; reminding him they could have gotten his old coat and given that away. The father told his children, “When we give, we are to give our best and not our cast offs. Even a man without a coat deserves the best coat to keep him warm. I can get another coat.” The woman was overcome and never forgot what her father had done that day. (I don’t know what the brothers thought about it all as I only knew the woman.)
I get it. A lot of people get it and not enough people get it. We are to give our best and even more important, we are to know that all deserve our best.
We are not to hand the cast offs from our soul to others and expect them then to kiss our shoes. What is truly amazing is that even those receiving the least from others can still be so grateful. These are the good people of the world. How can anyone not want to make a life better? To add the joy of a luxury—like Oreo’s or a beautiful coat is the extra part of remembering someone is human. Filling basic needs of another is humanity—doing so with kindness and respect and a generous spirit—is what makes the giver human.
We should be giving each person in our life the best parts of ourselves and not just the leftovers. We should be fulfilling each need that we are capable of filling. What we don’t realize is that if every human being did this—no one would be needy or lacking or doing without any of the important things.
Sometimes all we can give is our time, a kind word, a smile or a simple hello. How much sweeter it is to go through the day giving away hope than ignoring someone who needs us. And guess what? It costs nothing! It takes nothing from us in any way to give the best of ourselves. We only need to realize how much we actually have to offer and take that first step. Being generous is giving more than is needed or expected. It is opening yourself up to knowing the person next to you is just as valuable as you are no matter where they are, where they have come from or where they are going to.
Giving is not unselfish. It makes you feel better. It’s a boomerang, the more you put out into the world—the better you feel just being in the world.
I don’t quite believe the old adage of you get what you give. You don’t get exactly what you give. You get something more; you get to make a difference. You get to change one small piece of the world for the good.
You get to be the bag of Oreo’s in a life filled with canned green beans.
Monika M. Basile
Inside the basket were your typical items; a few cans of green beans and corn, instant potatoes, gravy mix, a ham etc., and something extraordinary—a bag of Oreo cookies. Oreo’s had always been and are my favorite. I remember holding them and trying to figure out when the last time I had one was and I couldn’t recall it. I was grateful for every bit of food that was given, but I was in wonder over the kind soul who thought to put an indulgence in a donation basket. I was incredulous to think that someone actually considered that even people coming from a place of need are deserving of some indulgence and they are deserving of our best.
I am thankful I have learned that lesson early on. I am grateful too that I have witnessed this phenomenon in others.
A woman once told me a story of her father, and how her brothers and she had given him a beautiful cashmere coat for Christmas. The father saw a homeless man on the street. He pulled that coat from his shoulders and wrapped it around the man. The children were all upset; reminding him they could have gotten his old coat and given that away. The father told his children, “When we give, we are to give our best and not our cast offs. Even a man without a coat deserves the best coat to keep him warm. I can get another coat.” The woman was overcome and never forgot what her father had done that day. (I don’t know what the brothers thought about it all as I only knew the woman.)
I get it. A lot of people get it and not enough people get it. We are to give our best and even more important, we are to know that all deserve our best.
We are not to hand the cast offs from our soul to others and expect them then to kiss our shoes. What is truly amazing is that even those receiving the least from others can still be so grateful. These are the good people of the world. How can anyone not want to make a life better? To add the joy of a luxury—like Oreo’s or a beautiful coat is the extra part of remembering someone is human. Filling basic needs of another is humanity—doing so with kindness and respect and a generous spirit—is what makes the giver human.
We should be giving each person in our life the best parts of ourselves and not just the leftovers. We should be fulfilling each need that we are capable of filling. What we don’t realize is that if every human being did this—no one would be needy or lacking or doing without any of the important things.
Sometimes all we can give is our time, a kind word, a smile or a simple hello. How much sweeter it is to go through the day giving away hope than ignoring someone who needs us. And guess what? It costs nothing! It takes nothing from us in any way to give the best of ourselves. We only need to realize how much we actually have to offer and take that first step. Being generous is giving more than is needed or expected. It is opening yourself up to knowing the person next to you is just as valuable as you are no matter where they are, where they have come from or where they are going to.
Giving is not unselfish. It makes you feel better. It’s a boomerang, the more you put out into the world—the better you feel just being in the world.
I don’t quite believe the old adage of you get what you give. You don’t get exactly what you give. You get something more; you get to make a difference. You get to change one small piece of the world for the good.
You get to be the bag of Oreo’s in a life filled with canned green beans.
Monika M. Basile
