Matthieu Ricard's Blog

The positive aspects of having a healthy sense of self-esteem have been explained and proven in depth by the French psychiatrist Christophe André in two of his books.

According to my good friend Christophe, self-esteem “when all is said and done, is what can enable us to make the best of what we are in the present moment, depending on our environment.” Positive self-esteem facilitates resilience and enables us to maintain our inner strength and serenity in the face of adverse life situations. It also allows us to acknowledge and be patient with our own imperfections and limitations without feeling diminished. In 1892, William James, the founder of modern psychology, wrote: “Strangely enough, our heart is extremely light once we have in all good faith accepted our own failings in a particular area.”

On the other hand, self-esteem based on an overinflated ego can only produce a false and fragile self-confidence. When the discrepancy with reality becomes too apparent, the ego becomes irritated, tenses up, and wavers. Self-confidence crumbles, and frustration, depression, and anger are all that remain.

True self-confidence t is naturally free from self-infatuation and does not depend on the promotion of an artificial self-image. Authentic self-esteem stems from a feeling of being in harmony with oneself based on a peaceful inner strength that external circumstances and inner fears cannot threaten. It is based on freedom that goes beyond fascination for one’s image and the fear of losing it.

Christophe André concludes that, “there is nothing further from positive self-esteem than pride. […] However, humility is not just a favorable condition for healthy self-esteem: it is the latter’s full essence.”

Nowadays it seems to be very fashionable to promote self-esteem. However, studies have shown that self-esteem can be counter-productive when it aims not only to help us develop self-confidence (which is an excellent thing), but also to fabricate a false self-image.

This has notably been the case in the United-States. The psychologist Roy Baumeister, author of the most complete review of research on self-esteem available today, has found that “It is doubtful whether minimal benefits justify the effort and expense schools, parents, and therapists have invested in the promotion of self-esteem […]. After all these years, I regret to say that I recommend the following: forget self-esteem and concentrate on self-control and self-discipline.”

Research shows that the development of self-control enables children to persevere in making an effort, concentrate on the right direction for a length of time, and do well in school. Teachings based on developing self-esteem have yet to show good results in these objectives. Students with better self-control have better chances to finish school and are at less risk of drinking, taking drugs, or becoming teenage parents.

However, it is important to underscore that “good” and healthy self-esteem is indispensable to leading a happy existence. Having a morbid devaluation of self can lead to deep psychological problems and intense suffering.

Wayne LaPierre, executive vice president of the National Rifle Association, said this as his response to the massacre of children at Sandy Hook elementary in Newtown, Connecticut : “The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.”

According to Jim Wallis, an evangelical Christian who dedicate himself and his organization Sojourners to address social injustice, « That statement is at the heart of the problem of gun violence in America today — not just because it is factually flawed, which of course it is, but also because it is morally mistaken, theologically dangerous, and religiously repugnant. »

Jim, with whom I had the chance to dialogue on a number of occasions, gives the following exemple : « Rev. Phil Jackson, a young dynamic street pastor from Chicago told me that Chicago had 2,400 shootings in 2012 — 505 of them resulting in death. More than 100 of them were children from elementary to high school. Almost all of the murdered ones were people and children of color — African-American and Latino. That’s more gun deaths in Chicago than American troop deaths in Afghanistan last year. One city. »

Jim Wallis, “The NRA’s Dangerous Theology”, on www.sojourners.org, 17 January, 2013.

During the conference on “Change Yourself, Change the World”, organized by Emergences in Brussels last September, Pierre Rabhi, a French thinker and pioneer in organic farming, and Matthieu Ricard discussed their views on life. Here is a selection of their answers to questions from this dialogue. You can find photos of these talks in a documentary on Pierre Rabhi that is part of the “Empreintes” TV series (available in French to be aired by France 5 in the beginning of 2013.

Forgetting the Elderly

Matthieu : I am staggered by the way Westerners treat the elderly. In Europe, 40% of old people live alone. I am shocked to see that in the West, grandparents are often abandoned in nursing homes when their role should be to give children their love and support. In Tibetan culture, grandparents are very important. They are the ones who give love and pass down their wisdom to children whose parents are often too busy working.

Pierre : Abandoning the elderly is just as unimaginable in my own culture. Grandmothers fed us, took care of us, loved us. In return to put them in nursing homes where all they have to do is watch time go by until their end comes is horrible. And to think that we have so much to gain by sharing with them! When something is important to you, you want to pass it on to those around you. If we care about the world, we should also care about the children we leave to the world.

Action in the Face of Violence :

Matthieu : We must break this vicious cycle of revenge. The Buddha said that “if hate begets hate, then hate will never end.” On the other hand, as Martin Luther King explained, the passivity of good people is just as bad as the actions of the bad. However, hate and greed are, in reality, only illnesses. They are not permanent and are not inherent to our true nature. This is actually what makes the death penalty inadmissible: it renders any transformation impossible.


I sometimes hear people say that we can’t love everyone, but look at the sun: it shines for us all. Some people get more warmth from it because they are closer, but not at others’ expense because we all enjoy its rays. Our own happiness depends on the happiness of others, we cannot be happy at the cost of others’ unhappiness. Selfish happiness is a recipe for failure. At my own humble level, I often draw strength in my hermitage in order to be as human as possible and to be able to serve others.

Pierre : I have often felt angry, wanting to rebel, but have never resorted to violence. In the choice between fighting with bombs and fighting using compost, which nourishes and maintains life, I have chosen compost! I practice organic farming for the future generations, for the world. The land is what ties me to people. The land is my mother, she nourishes me, and, as her son, I nourish her in return. She is also like my wife in the love that I have for her.


I am also fighting to support the existence of small stores and markets. They help keep the ties between people; supermarkets only produce robots pushing carts. I am tolerant regarding human beings. I feel that we all need to follow our own paths, that we all have our own conscience to uphold us, and I do not wish to judge anyone.

Excerpts from scenes taken by Vincent Feragus for a documentary that is part of the “Empreintes” collection (available in French), edited by Pascal Greboval and Lucile Vannier.

During the conference on “Change Yourself, Change the World”, organized by Emergences in Brussels last September, Pierre Rabhi, a French thinker and pioneer in organic farming, and Matthieu Ricard discussed their views on life. Here is a selection of their answers to questions from this dialogue. You can find photos of these talks in a documentary on Pierre Rabhi that is part of the “Empreintes” TV series (available in French to be aired by France 5 in the beginning of 2013.

What is the most indispensable change needed for our world today?

Matthieu : I think we have to stop our race for always having more. The crisis we are currently going through is linked to that.


We put so much effort into things that are not really important. Many people struggle at a job that they feel is of little use to themselves or humanity. It is important to seek simplicity, to try to find happiness and fulfillment without always needing more. In Europe and North America, 30% of all food and medicine produced is thrown away!


Pierre : Matthieu is right, there is no limit to the constant feeling of wanting more. The acceleration that international trade creates actually puts us in opposition to the logic of peace. It is a social fragmentation bomb.

So, our world is now very violent ?

Pierre : Our world is full of violence. This violence is not only a question of hitting one another. It is surprising that killing one person is a crime while killing one hundred is an honor.


Violence exists in other ways too: world hunger is an incredible form of violence committed by those who are fed against those who have nothing. It is untenable that we exploit and keep hungry so-called developing countries, while at the same time taking from them more that they can give us. Likewise, the way we treat animals, putting them in what amounts to concentration camps, is another form of violence.


Matthieu : Yes we can clearly speak of concentration camps where slaughterhouses are concerned and, as a matter of fact, concentration camp survivors have themselves made this comparison. Gandhi said that a civilization can be judged by the way it treats its animals.


The fundamental aspiration of all human beings is to avoid suffering. Where violence between humans is concerned we have to remember that often war is done by people who don’t know each other but kill each other, for people who know each other but don’t kill each other.

Excerpts from scenes taken by Vincent Feragus for a documentary that is part of the “Empreintes” collection (available in French), edited by Pascal Greboval and Lucile Vannier.

During the conference on “Change Yourself, Change the World”, organized by Emergences in Brussels last September, Pierre Rabhi, a French thinker and pioneer in organic farming, and Matthieu Ricard discussed their views on life. Here is a selection of their answers to questions from this dialogue. You can find photos of these talks in a documentary on Pierre Rabhi that is part of the “Empreintes” TV series (available in French to be aired by France 5 in the beginning of 2013.

Q: Are both of you… Rhabi, the Algerian living in Ardèche, in France, and Matthieu Ricard, the French Tibetan Buddhist monk…. without roots ?

Pierre Rabhi : For my part, for a long time I felt like I was in exile. I was excluded from Islam and from my own European family, and I found myself with no place to call my own, wandering for a long time. I became a man without a country, and had to create my own country. I finally felt “at home” when I bought a rocky piece of land in Ardèche. It is a tiny bit of land on the world scale, but this land I loved gave me roots.


Matthieu Ricard : My experience is different, I never felt without roots; on the contrary, I feel like I possess my own roots. I have no house and no land; I live in a retreat cabin that does not belong to me and where I shall probably spend my last days. If I am at home there it is because I find myself at the heart of what occupies me there. But my real roots are my spiritual teachers; they are with me wherever I go. It’s another life choice, just a different one. I prefer not to leave a trace.

Q: Two different paths, but with converging points?

Pierre : We are brothers in conscience. We must transcend our ties that in the end divide us and we must develop a sociology of consciences, more than a sociology of where we come from.


Matthieu : What unites us is our shared humanity. As the Dalai Lama likes to remind us, he is first and foremost a human being. He is then a Tibetan, then a Buddhist monk, and only on the fourth level is he the Dalia Lama, which, he says, has little importance. We speak with different words, but it seems that we share the same feelings. What counts is to serve, to share ideas for a better world. The future is in the hands of altruistic people willing to cooperate. If a sufficient number of similar approaches can create a critical mass, then at one point there may be a tipping point that will trigger a cultural change in society, towards deeper solidarity and benevolence.

Excerpts from scenes taken by Vincent Feragus for a documentary that is part of the “Empreintes” collection (available in French), edited by Pascal Greboval and Lucile Vannier.

The Brahmaputra estuary

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Malacca Detroit, Thailand

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I first met Fazel Abed in Vancouver during a Nobel Laureate Peace Conference with His Holiness the Dalai Lama that I was attending. I had no idea who he was. When he asked me what I did, I answered that I had founded a humanitarian organization that had built around 30 schools and 15 clinics. Without the least affectation, he replied “I have built 35,000 schools.” I felt very insignificant.

Another time, in Delhi, he told me “It’s very simple, you just have to take what you have done and multiply it by a hundred.” That is certainly what he has done.


Fazel Abed was born in eastern Pakistan (later it became Bangladesh). He first studied naval architecture at the University of Glasgow, and then, because there were very few shipyards in Eastern Pakistan, he went to London to study accounting.

When he returned to eastern Pakistan, Fazel was hired by Shell and rapidly rose in the company. He was based in London when, in 1970, a cyclone ravaged his country and left 300 000 victims.

Fazel quit his extremely well paid job and returned to Pakistan where, with a few friends, he created HELP, an organization to help those most affected on the island of Manpura, which had lost 75% of its population. Later he was forced leave eastern Pakistan during the fighting that preceded its separation from western Pakistan. He founded a NGO to support the independence of his country.

When the war for independence ended in 1971, Fazel sold his London apartment and left to help his country. It was emerging from a devastating war and 10 million people, who had taken refuge in India during the fighting, had returned. Fazel decided to start working in an isolated rural region and founded BRAC (Bangladesh Rural Advancement Committee).

Thanks to his genius at organization, BRAC has now become the world’s largest NGO. It has helped 70 million women, and a total of more than 110 million people in 69,000 villages. 80,000 volunteers and 120,000 employees work for BRAC in a continually increasing number of countries. For example in Africa, Fazel Abed found that his multilevel model – micro-financing, education, safe water management, improvement of hygiene, and so on – was extremely efficient in regions where very few other attempts to help had succeeded.

Without exaggerating, we can say that BRAC has changed the course of Bangladesh’s future. There is not one area in the countryside where the BRAC logo cannot be found on a school, a women training center, or a workshop for women and family planning.

Fazel Abed has done what he set out to do. Not only has he multiplied his activities by one hundred, he has done so by one thousand, all the while maintaining the same efficiency and quality.

One morning at the end of the 2010 session of the Davos Economic Forum, where many participants arrive by private jet and travel by helicopter or limousine, I found Fazel, sitting alone in a bus that was to take us to Zurich airport. This said a lot about his simplicity and modesty behind which burns the unquenchable determination that enabled him to accomplish such an enormous task.

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On violence in the media: “It is a trivialization of evil which suggests that what is sensational is to takeover the other. However, what is truly sensational is ordinary day to day heroism — a smile given every day to the old lady who is our neighbor, giving a hand to someone. We must rehabilitate gratuitous acts.”

On the exploitation of animals: “When the individual becomes king, he evaluates every according to his own interests and rules over the life of another sentient being.”

On the environment: “The ‘I’, by estranging itself from its environment, eventually despises everything and instrumentalizes it. To take into account all those who will be born in this world is to get out of the ‘me only’ attitude and expand the circle of my interests to embrace all sentient beings.”

On daring altruism: “Altruism is audacious precisely because it collapses the old benchmarks set by the ‘me first’ attitude. Altruism is to learn again to be truly free of alienating limitations that make us prisoners of what we believe we are.”

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Can one change: “Real change has to be led by example. Nowadays, society makes the success a purely individualistic matter.”

On the crystallization of the self: “This is a phenomenon of protection. While believing that one is protecting oneself, we create a prison that ends up feeling very stuffy.”

On cooperation: “We must show that solidarity is not only a virtue, but partakes of the very nature of existence. To cooperate is to live.”

On enlightened education: “Free parents can teach freedom. Above all we must achieve inner freedom and free ourself from all prejudices. Too often we consider freedom as a self-indulgence, or authoritarianism upon the other, while the opposite is true inner freedom. Enlightened education is rooted in the example of parents open to others, ready to help. Too often we are beggars of affection and the other becomes a means to our own ends. The other becomes instrumentalized. Education must therefore show the value of each and every life and the beauty of altruism.”

On a caring economy: “This is an economy that is shifting its perspective from the ‘I’ to the ‘we’.”