I must say that I'm somewhat upset at the current state of things around here. No one is giving me the least bit of attention and that's really unconscionable. If I were to clean the house, perhaps someone would notice me then. Maybe I should make pancakes. How about if I fill the bathtub and go swimming? I suppose I could call the cops. But then they'd just want to know why.

It just seems to me that anyone would be honored to have me living with them. After all, I could live anywhere, if I wanted to. In fact, I might come and live with you….