Good news.  Or bad.  Depending on your perspective.

I am being let out of my locked office for ten days to go on a book tour.  I’ll be visiting eight different cities.

All in support of my next treasury, which looks like this:

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The eight cities will be announced soon (Thus, the black strips over their names in the banner.  That’s to build suspense.  Are you suspended yet?)

The tour will begin April 21.  This will give all of the cities the necessary  time to obtain restraining orders.

No, that’s not true.  I can go anywhere.

Except Turkey.

But that’s a discussion for another day.  So if you were planning on a big signing in Ankara, you might want to make other plans.

At each tour stop, I’ll be showing strips, reading hate mail, and signing books.   I will not be perched atop a girl’s bicycle.

And please, someone bring beer.  Even if the bookstores tell you not to.  Because, as you can see from the photo above, I’m a rebel.