Five Fabulous Tips for Writing Fantastic Characters

1. The Chosen One. People like to read stories where the hero is born special, just like them. The most effective way to demonstrate that a character is special is to refer to local legend. A lot of really important people in history got their start in prophecy, like Napoleon and Abraham Lincoln. Remember the fantasy movie The Matrix? The main character’s name was Neo. That’s “One” spelled backwards. It’s not a coincidence.

2. Let the plot dictate the backstory. Let’s face it, backstory is boring. That’s why it’s backstory and not frontstory. Backstory is for fixing plot holes. For example, late in the game, the hero of your book steals a tank. How does he know how to drive a tank? Well, it just so happens that his father was a tank driver. (Oh my god, that’s crazy! I know!) Then later when the hero discovers some Sanskrit tablet, it turns out he reads Sanskrit because his grandmother was the most famous archeologist in the world, and she taught him to read every language from Greek to Roman to Spanish, or whatever. Boom. Backstory.

3. Tragedy builds character. We all know that adversity is the great teacher. What doesn’t kill you, makes you smarter. It’s a fact. This is why old people are really wise. Yoda was 900 years old, and he was so smart he could read minds. It works like this: you get cancer; you learn about the meaning of life. You shoot your buddy in a hunting accident; you learn about friendship. Your spouse dies in a terrorist attack; you learn everything about international politics and firearms. Dead spouses and dead children make characters really great. If at all possible, combine the two. For example, “Jack lost his pregnant wife in an elevator fire.” That tells us everything we need to know about Jack. Why is he relentless and angry and crazy good at kicking people? His wife got cooked like a turkey in an elevator shaft.

4. Love at first sight. Everybody likes a good love story, and they’re easy to add to almost any plot. Don’t overthink it, though. Nobody wants to read about the slow budding of feelings that occurs when two people reveal their inner-most desires and fears while sharing the mundane pleasures of daily life over the course of weeks and months and years. Ambien alert. All you need is two really good-looking people. Nobody knows why anybody falls in love, so don’t bother trying to explain it. If you emphasize that they’re really super attractive, the reader will fill in the blanks. Why are Jack and Angelica in love? Because Angelica can carry a potpie in her cleavage. Awesome.

5. Revenge is the only motive. Real world motives don’t work well in fiction. A real world motive is something like, “John goes to work because he doesn’t want to eat Panera dumpster bread.” Well, hurray for John. Revenge is the best motive because it’s something everyone has experience with. We all have enemies. Most of us have a room in our home dedicated to pinned up maps and highlighted articles and creepy charcoal drawings of eyes and photographs taken with a telephoto lens. Revenge is also a simple motive to maintain. No matter what happens to our hero, there’s no reevaluation of priorities. He’s never like, “Oh, it’s such a pretty day. Look at those joggers; look at those ducks. I really should stop chasing my father’s killer, and just take some time to focus on me. Maybe try hot yoga.” Catharsis requires a bloodbath. It’s like therapy. Read Othello.