Sydney Ledger's Blog

So, although I had my mind set on starting this, that or the other, I was still a bit lazy and undisciplined. Therefore, I decided to create a daily schedule plan to help me prioritize and be stricter with my routine, ie. Taking care of household duties & my family, writing my books and making sure I meet deadlines, finishing up freelance work and fulfilling promises to friends, as well as EXERCISING and grooming myself.I thought it was time to be the best ME I could possibly be, and what better way to do that than making sure I'm good on both the inside and out! I started exercising yesterday and reinstated my hair grooming techniques for healthier, better hair. It's time I do the right thing. I can't have the visions of who I want to be in my mind without actually working towards it.I recently was contacted by two persons, one for the start-up of a design company - talented fellow. He wants me to handle the 'graphic design services' aspect of the company which is great because I can work from home (apart from when I may need to meet with clients), and the other guy, wants me to act in an up-coming Sketch Comedy TV show that would be airing on one of our local channels.How amazing is it, that as I decided to make this my full-time gig, that I also get to do the other things I am passionate about; graphic design & film! Like is this real? God is sooo good to me - ain't no denying.SO today was my first official day of sticking to my schedule and I have never felt more accomplished and pumped! The exercising has me feeling a little worn out, but beyond that, I feel great. I'm getting things done and I am MAKING MOVEMENTS!In a couple days, weeks, months, I'd finally be WHO I want to BE!It's time we take responsibility and full control of who we want to be and where we want to go. No one can make the things we desire happen, but us! It is within our right and ability to start somewhere. Baby steps. Work towards what you want, and you'd be amazed at the result. Just these little movements that I decided to take has me feeling better, and much more confident in myself and my dreams. Continue on your path and nothing will ever have you feeling down - trust me.Make Movements towards whatever it is you want to achieve, push through, AND IN TIME, you will SEE the amazing changes and POSITIVE effects it reaps. THINGS will happen, but only until YOU set it in MOTION!

Humans are way more powerful than we are led to believe, and I  mean rich or poor, we are powerful, but its up to you to manifest that power. Your MIND! Yep, the most powerful tool on this Earth - in this WORLD!I mean, without our minds, there would be no advancement, technology, electronics and mechanics would have been nothing. But because of some great mind that saw it and believed it, worked towards it, and created it! Seeing is not believing, Believing is Seeing.You've got to believe in yourself and work countlessly towards that belief and then you'd see it taking form. It would soon become a reality. And that, my friend, is the Power of Believing.You may think things aren't working in your favour, but that's just not true. Things take time. If all these great inventors gave up on their first try, we'd all still be primitive. I wouldn't be on this laptop as I am right now. It's just what it is!Believe in yourself, believe in your dreams, believe in your elevation and betterment, and in time, it would be the reality. All of our greatest entertainers started off with a dream and worked hard towards it, even when it looked impossible, even when other discouraged them and told them their dreams were unrealistic, they pushed through and came out on top.Never be discouraged from your dreams and never discourage others. Push them and help be their strength - be a support. Be the positive entity you would like to see in this world. Help those in need and continue to strive for your best! In time, it'll pay off.I have never felt so positive and sure of anything in all my life, since I've made the decision to pursue my writing full time. It's a scary step but I'm excited and ready for this new journey. Nothing can break my spirit. This was just what I was meant for. The Power of Believing! If I didn't believe in myself, I'd be terrified to even start making this step. But here I am, working tirelessly towards it.I can't wait for the day when millions read these words, read from where I began and be inspired. Could you imagine that? I'm here today, believing in myself, and in due time, when my dreams are realized, others will see this and understand how hard I believed in myself and how hard I worked.So, don't stop believing.

So.... after my inexplicable vent on my last post, I have finally sought comfort in the knowledge that my cousin had bestowed upon me. Things were falling apart for me, I think maybe because I turned my back on God, and turned my back on believing or feeling, just coasting through life without any sense of direction, purpose or dedication to my craft. I was numb to everything around me, sure I wrote my book, but I really was not feeling myself at all.After some not so cool events in my life recently, I decided to give up and I became depressed and a bit negative, giving way for my recent venting. My cousin saw the vent and parted onto me some words of encouragement, 'maybe, you being unemployed is a sign that you should start following your dreams', and to be honest, at first I was like "yeah, okay", but then when it began to resonate with me, I began taking heed into what she said, and what she advised. START MY WEBSITE, BRAND MYSELF, GET MYSELF OUT THERE, PUT OUT YOUR WORK.Now this is all fine and dandy, but I have a family. Becoming a full time writer would mean that I won't have a steady income. That is something I would have to fly by with my hussy as he is sole provider at the moment. So i did. Not expecting him to agree, but without hesitation he said yes. And that boosted my confidence to another level. It was all I needed. His moral support and complete trust that I would indeed make it as a writer.I began praying again, feeling more uplifted than I had in a really long time. I began my website and myFacebook fan pagesand started really putting in a bit of work to start myself up, and the way I feel right now is unimaginable. I really feel good about this decision. Sure it would take sometime before I could start making a living off my writing, but we all have to start somewhere.I can't express enough how genuinely proud I am of myself and I haven't even released my book yet. The optimism I feel about my book and my future endeavors is surreal. I truly believe in me this time around.So, in conclusion, we must know when to look for signs of our elevation. They would look like a tumultuous series of events, it would look like no break is happening. Every thing may crumble at your feet, and maybe, just maybe, it's a sign for you to start a new chapter in your life. A sign for you to take that big leap of faith, that big chance and follow your dreams and your heart's desire. As long as it's something positive, take the shot - go for it!Never be afraid of taking risks. You never know what would be in store for you. Don't let others discourage you. For me, I was encouraged by everyone around me, which was the affirmation that I was on the right path of making this decision. I don't usually care what others think, but this one time I really needed it as a sign, and my choice was received positively by everyone.Life is funny, and God works in mysterious ways, but he never fails!I conclude, take that leap!I'm about to take this leap and I'm not even scared, I'm excited!Leave your comments, share this blog with people you think may need it and be happy! :)

Man... i think I am beginning to break. I think that things are going crazy. I think my life is falling apart. I think that the stress of things lately - stuff that I hold back inside - is eating me alive. I think I have been trying to be too strong for too long and the floor is crumbling beneath my feet. I think I feel lonely a lot of the times and try to overcompensate with the company of social media and friends. I am tired. I want to make things right and I think I am losing focus on what's right and important. The mistakes I have made and the things I have done - trying to fill a void - a void i have been ignoring. I think I may be feeling depressed and mask it with my ongoing positivity, but It's backfiring on me in ways not even I can comprehend. I have been acting a little out of character lately... feeling fed up.Not so good thoughts enter my mind. And I am trying for the life of me, to not fall into its trap. Destroying myself. At times i feel so genuinely happy and excited, but then it just slowly fades as the thoughts come. Things a little tough right now and I am trying my best to do my best and be my best, sometimes I relapse. But Im trying nonetheless. I love the people I have in my life but it just feels like its not enough. Maybe it's the stress of my inability to find a job... feeling like I'm on a treadmill. I see everyone else is moving forward and I feel like I am standing still. Everything happens for a reason, everything happens in its time. But somehow, I find it hard to shake this self loathing feeling. I'm thinking out Loud here. ‪#‎ventover‬

I am here drowning myself in a bit of fear and worry as I look through the classifieds trying to find a job, and I think to myself why are you worried??? You know how this thing goes!!!In fact... I find myself believing at times that this time at home is a blessing, considering the fact that I have to complete a short film for school and complete my book. Stop worrying!When the time comes, I will get a great paying job at a great location, if not my old job.The thing is, I'm just worried about all the upcoming events and that my family and I won't be able to afford and enjoy them. My daughter's 4th birthday is on the 31st of January... then Valentine's day... then my hubby's birthday is on the 22nd of February... and mine is on the 8th of March. I really wanted to do something special this year as last year was a total bust.I just want a bit of financial freedom for ONCE!But why am I worried? God has a way of making things work in your favour. I am grateful for the roof over my head, the food that I get to eat, the clothes on my back, my little happy family and basically every thing that I overcame thus far. I am truly grateful and despite not having luxuries... I am so happy.I just really want a job to help my hubby pay off for these appliances and to start saving so we could build our own home and to go out on a date every once in a while.I'm not worried. My blessing and financial freedom is coming soon and that's all that matters!!!! Life is great and I am thankful.Never get worried!

Man... it's been a veryyyyy long time since I've posted... which is sad really because I had received an insurmountable number of blessings between then and now.Firtsly, my landlord selling my lovely boyfriend and I brand new appliances for our apartment which we could pay over a period of time.The thing is my bf didnt have a steady job and I was still looking for one. Then, by chance, I sent my resume to this place that I wasnt expecting to pay good. Went in for the interview and bam! Got the job, started the next day and the exact salary I was hoping for. Strange twist of faith... I got my bf a job at the company as well and he was getting twice as much as my salary... so we were all set!!!!Our home was put together and everything was fine. My boss was veryyyy generous as well. He knew about my little financial hiccup and helped out.  Sad thing though, is that he is also extremelyyyy difficult to work with and with that, I ended up leaving my job a few weeks before christmas.However, I loved the job soooo much... like really loved it that i was getting severe withdrawal symptoms. Lol. I really miss my job. I am home these days. And the Operations Manager is vouching for me to return to the job as the boss now wants to fire his current employee that had replaced me after I left. So hopefully I can return.But hey, God is good and he is in control. Funny thing is, I am taking this time to complete my book. It's almost finished and I can't wait to publish it to amazon. Hopefully by next week. In The Spur of Heath is the title, so please look out for it. I promise i shall return to posting religiously on here. I was just so caught up in everything that I didn't have the time.Even though I'm not working, my bf's salary can still cover us until I get a job. So fingers crossed. God is good.I started a couple months ago with no stove - just a bed, wardrobe and fridge - and now I have everything I need in my household! The power of prayer and a positive mindset.I can never find myself worried ever again. It's strange. When you've been positive for as long as I have been and open your eyes to the secrets of life and the laws of attraction, you could never be worried again.Yes, being human, you would find yourself worried about something every once in a while, but when you catch yourself... you are like, "oh wait! What the hec am i worried about? Ive been through this before!" And then you put your mind at ease and bam! Stuff begins to work in your favour.It is the method to this madness we call living. Just follow it and you would see. It would never hurt to try.People are afraid of being let down, when in fact, their negativity is the biggest let down of all time.Dont release that energy into the Universe. Get rid of it! Think what you want. Believe in what you want. Make steps toward what you want. Even though you don't see it yet, soon enough, you will have what you want.My experiences and my faith have never failed me yet. Do good and good shall follow.With all that being said, I'd like to wish you all a very happy happy happy, prosperous, successful and faithfilled New Year.I declare, 2016 is my year!!!! Stay tuned for weekly updates and I hope I can inspire each and every one of you.Leave your comments or email me . Thank you.

So... it's been a while since I have posted anything but that's because I was busy receiving my many blessings and putting things in place for my big move! Yep, that's right - I got an apartment and moved in on Saturday (29th August).After my desperate search for an apartment in close proximity to my baby girl's preschool, I found something - not as close - but something really nice. When I first contacted the Landlord, I thought he sounded like a really nice man, then when I met him I found that I was right. Very nice guy indeed! I was so elated.My grandparents gave me the money for the first month's rent and the security deposit and I received the keys for my place. Now the next struggle was to find a baby sitter and a way to get my daughter from the sitter to school and back. Lo and behold - one of the tenants at the apartment babysits and for much cheaper than the original daycare my daughter used to go to, and that's not all - *drumroll please* - the Landlord told me not to send her to that school so far away because it would be too difficult and expensive to get a driver to carry her to her school and that I should send her to the preschool near the area (one minute's drive away) - I was blown away. I asked if he is sure I would get through as school is reopening in about a week and he said yes and carried me to the preschool - and that's not all either. When I talked to the principal and asked about fees she said it's FREE, she just got into partnership with the Government so I don't need to pay a red cent!Now please tell me being positive and holding faith doesn't work - if you do, I would never believe you! Like I said in one of my earlier posts - don't stress over stuff when it seems like things aren't working out because behind the scenes, where you can't see, things are slowly falling into place for an even greater reward. Now I have cut a significant amount of money off my budget.As for my education, my mother told me she would pay for me to go to school, so I'd be going tomorrow to register - yay! Anddddd, a friend of mine told me her friend is the Project Manager of the newly built Children's Hospital (in my country Trinidad) and that he will get a job for me! And that Hospital is really close to where I live. This is why I'm so elated. I have accomplished more than I ever could in two weeks than I did all year.With a lot of effort and faith, you really can accomplish a lot. Never get discouraged when it seems like it's not going your way because most times our way isn't as great as we think it, but God's way, indeed, is much greater. Had I tried to fight this our simply gave up, I would have never received these many blessings. Things wouldn't have worked as great as it did if it went the way I wanted.My boyfriend, daughter and I are much happier now. And of all the plans my boyfriend and I have made to gain financial freedom and success - I feel closer to it now than I ever had before.

We all have our dreams... some of our dreams are easily reachable while the rest of our dreams seem so far out of reach.We plan so intricately about what we would do in our life and how we want to reach there... mapping out everything, only to realise it is never ever that simple.So many circumstances and events occur that we go off track, lose our enthusiasm, our hope and just feel to give up. I swear these days with my circumstance, i feel to give up but then I remember all that I know. This blog has actually been quite therapeautic for me. How can i give up and I know the method to this madness? After all I've been through my 22 years of life how dare I? How unfair would it be to my sweetheart that her mummy gives up.No - I shall not give up and even though my dreams seem far - they grow closer and closer every day that you believe and work hard. When I remind myself of this, I become so content and happy with life and feel as though I have already accomplished every thing that I want. And that, my friend, is how you know you are doing the positivity thing right. You are never worried of the future because you know it is set for you.Stop trying to map out how you reach there, because it will never go as planned. You will reach, no doubt, but you just won't reach the way you want. Life isn't the easiest - in fact it's quite complicated, but with the right tools and mindset, it definitely can be better.So, if circumstances are rough, don't give up, don't throw your hands in the air, don't cry about it - think of solutions to keep going! And with determination - your dreams would be closer than they were ever before. Just because you can't see it - doesn't make it any less true. In due time, you would see it.God (or the Universe) which ever you prefer to believe in (in my case God), would always direct you to a better path, even better than the one you wanted. So once again, never give up. Trials and tribulations are there to make you better, test your faith, teach you life lessons, make you stronger or to redirect you to a better path, so never be discouraged by them!Okay, so, I hope a lot of people that need these messages see this blog because I have always felt better when I could uplift people and their spirits. I would talk like this with friends and give them so much advice and when they tell me how much I have helped them, I felt so good inside. I never thought of doing a blog, especially one like this and I feel really great about it now.

So... I'm still at my grandmother's and it has been almost a week. I am losing my mind! Between trying to find an apartment and a job within the vicinity of my daughter's school, I dont know what to do. There are some decent priced apartments around but the trouble is to find one in a reachable area to her school. I cant just tranfer her now a week before school starts. Sigh. Things are looking a bit bad sooo that means that something good is going to fall into place and I really just canot wait for it!I am content and God is great but I wont stop trying. Things will fall into place at the right time, in the right moment. That I am sure of! Nothing happens before its time and when it does it's all in favour of you. Just keep the right mind - positive, optimistic and faithfilled.I am determined to live my absolute best life now and believe me... hear me declare that I will. Change is constant and moments of bad are only temporary. Remember this - Patience is key.Things do not happen at the very moment you want them to. You have to believe with all your heart it will and also do all that is humanly possible to make it happen and just wait. In due time, all works out.I've been through a lot of seemingly impossible situations before and the pattern was the same; things fall apart, a lot of drama begins to pile up, nothing seems to happen when you're desperately trying to resolve it and just like that, when you think that it's just too impossible and nothing is happening - BAM! It just begins working itself out.You see, with this, what happens is, you send that frequency or signal out into the universe, what you want and so determined to have sets in play. The perfect circumstance and perfect set up takes time as other people have to be put in place to coincide with you. This takes time and it also is a test of faith.Don't fail, it will work out. Be blessed, not stressed. Be a victor, not a victim! Once again, need to talk, i have eyes and ears. Comment or send me an email. :)

So... here I am after posting about positivity, and suddenly an onslaught of terrible happenings enter in my life. Sigh! I was kicked out of my home by my mother (she usually does this unfortunately) and i think that i have reached my witts end!!! I am tired and ready to give up was all that I could think as tears spilled down my cheeks in what could have been a fetal position of self pity, suicidal tendencies and self hatred!!! I was so done with life!Eventually, after a few minutes of overwhelming negative emotions and loving consolations from my very caring boyfriend, I dusted myself off and discarded every bit of pessimistic energy and began to do what I always do - be happy!Now, the thing with this is, I am 22, single mother, recently unemployed and starting tertiary level education in September (2015). My mother was supposed to help me with the school fees, my bf and I were trying to save up money to build our home on a piece of land that he owns and my daughter is about to start pre school in September as well so every thing seems like it's totally falling apart. It's ridiculous!Because I have no job, I am basically a financial burden on my bf although he has told me he doesnt mind and things would get better, but we cant save shit and move forward because every cent he makes goes towards my daughter, me (to get around) and for him to reach to work. My bf also has a not-so-good living arrangement. I feel so terrible about this. So, you know every thing looks absolutely impossible right now.But as i stated in another post, just when it seems like things are at its absolute worst, is when it just magically turns around. So I cannot, will not, shall not lose my faith. I believe every thing happens for a reason to contribute positively to your growth in life and I stand by that. I know things willl turn around.So, here I am, on my grandmother's couch, declaring my faith and my happiness and I would never let this entire mess deter me from my full potential. I trust in the Lord. I will definitely upate this post and let you know how things turn out.Whatever or whoever you believe in, doesn't matter. The mere fact that you trust wholeheartedly is all that matters. Things will always work out. Hope I have inspired the lot of you. Once again, if you need an ear, I am here.