Sandy Barker's Blog

I love a good love triangle. I love reading them and watching them, and I love writing them, especially the romcom version.

Where the non-comedic love triangle will often explore deeper, darker themes of heartbreak, loss and forever wondering ‘what if?’ – not just for the person who is left alone, but also for the person who makes the choice – the romcom version allows a ‘lighter touch’, finding the humour in the situation.

In The One That I Want, book 3 in the Ever After Agency series, I had a great time exploring the love triangle trope, especially as for some time our heroine, Greta, has yet to meet one of the love interests. He’s Greta’s first match with the matchmaking agency and it’s terrific fun (for us) when she develops an attraction to a man she’s never met, based solely on a biography and a photo. With her imagination running wild, her bestie questions whether he can live up to the version of him she’s created inside her mind.

Another aspect of love triangles I enjoyed exploring was the complexity of making the ‘right’ decision – the one that will have readers cheering our heroine on and shouting, ‘Yes!’ 

Wanting to make the right decision comes with a hefty dose of conflict, as well as to-and-froing between the two love interests. And even when Greta decides which man she wants – in true romcom fashion – the path to finding love becomes even trickier, making for an even juicier read.

For those who loved Season 2 of Bridgerton (or the book it was based on, The Viscount Who Loved Me), Anthony’s internal conflict – him wanting to make the ‘right’ decision – was a battle between duty and desire. This battle was compelling – often comedic, but also leading to some of the sexiest (but not raciest) scenes of the season.

I also enjoy when the love triangle leads to the main character’s growth and development, with both love interests bringing out something special in the main character. As readers and viewers, we see this play out in one of my favourite romcom series, Bridget Jones’s Diary.

There’s Daniel Cleaver, the sexy bad boy who awakens Bridget’s sexuality, sassiness and grit – a downturn in their relationship prompts her to quit her ho-hum job and get into television. And, of course, Mark D’Arcy is the curmudgeon, who despite all outward appearances tells Bridget he likes her ‘just the way you are’ (swoon). Bridget is transformed by her relationships by both men, gaining both confidence and self-acceptance.

And if you haven’t seen the latest movie, Mad About the Boy, there’s a whole new love triangle. It’s also BRILLIANT by the way.

In The One That I Want, Greta becomes much more self-aware about what she does – and doesn’t – want from a relationship, largely from her interactions with both love interests. 

I hope you enjoy reading Greta’s romantic escapades and I’m sure you will love who she eventually chooses. I did.

Hi. If you’re new here, I’m Sandy. I’m a menopausal Gen-Xer in my mid-50s and I write romcoms.

This is the most recent photo of me (I promise) and yes, that is Sam Heughan and no, I will not stop sharing this photo

I do other things too, but the two things I want to talk about today are menopause and romcoms (but not in that order).

And if you think that mid-50s is a little old to be writing romcoms, then [spoiler alert] I’m about to blow your mind.

I know a LOT of romcom authors — a MEET CUTE of romcom authors (for that must be the collective noun, right?) — and most of the romcom authors I know are 40+, with a lot of us in our 50s and 60s – and yes, even 70s. There are a handful of 30-somethings in my (large) romcom-y circle, but guess what? They will soon be 40-somethings and very likely will still be writing romcoms.

Now why, when most romcom MCs (that’s main characters if you’re here solely for the ‘menopause’ part of today’s proceedings,) are in their 20s and 30s, are so many 40+ romcom authors doing such a brilliant job at writing romcoms people enjoy?

To address this question, I’ve prepared a list:

Because we’ve lived it. We’ve lived our 20s and 30s so we know what it’s like to be 20- or 30-something

That’s it—that’s the list. And sure, we may need to research the latest vernacular or stay abreast of pop cultural references, but writing the truth of falling in love and heartbreak and moving on and happily ever afters? We excel at that. Because we’ve lived it.

Now, this is not to disparage younger authors — NOT. AT. ALL. There are brilliant authors in their 20s and 30s writing hilarious and heartfelt romcoms and smashing it. Emily Henry is the reigning queen of romcoms for a reason — or one of them. Not playing favourites, I promise.

But back to the middle-aged romcom authors…

I started writing my first book — a romcom — when I was in my 40s. It sparked a series and in the final book A Wedding in Tuscany the main character turns 40 (which, as an aside, is a very sexy age so I wrote lots of sex into that book). By the time this book was published, I’d turned 53, but I was writing late-30s into the 40s and that felt authentic to me. I could draw on my (fairly) recent past.

Now I’m in my 50s, I’ve been asked to write 20-somethings (because most BookTokers — TikTokers who create content about books — are 20-something), which I can do, but feels less authentic. My publisher and I have settled on 30-something MCs, which suits us both. For now.

The thing is, middle-aged people want romcoms too (and we have the disposable income to buy them, but that’s a whole other post).

We want romcoms for us, about us — about finding love later in life when we’re established in our careers and know who we are and what we will and will not put up with, when we’re well travelled and financially secure, when we’re divorced or single parents, when we’re menopausal (or manopausal) and ache all the time, when we have good credit and can buy expensive things without it becoming a plot point, when our friendships are decades old and our college years are a distant memory…

And there are middle-aged people falling (hilariously) in love on our screens — Ticket to Paradise, Mother of the Bride, Shotgun Wedding…

So I really thought, this many books in, that I would get to write those romcoms, get to tell the stories of my contemporaries — become the Nora Ephron of the publishing world (I know, I know, in my dreams — maybe Nora Ephron’s second cousin, once removed’s barista).

But alas, no. Maybe one day when the BookTok juggernaut has had its moment and the Booktokers age out of romcoms solely about 20- and 30-somethings and the publishing world wants to find the next Kathy Lette or Marian Keyes.

Which (clumsy segue) bring me to my second topic of the day: menopause.

It’s a really unsexy word, I know, but there’s something incredible happening across the world right this very second. Gen-X is in MENOPAUSE! Well, not all of us, but the majority. Let’s just agree that it’s enough of us to launch a MENOPAUSE REVOLUTION.

We are here and we are menopausal and we are not shutting up about it. Naomi Watts has shared her embarrassing story about ripping of her oestrogen patch the first time she had sex with her (now husband) Billy Crudup and Halle Berry is telling everyone who will listen about her vaginal dryness journey. Halle Berry!

Gen-X is tackling menopause the same way we tackle everything: unapologetically, loudly, and head (fucking) on. We are educating ourselves, we are sharing our experiences, we are proudly being menopausal.

And to the younger generations of women who are coming up behind us, you’re welcome. You will not have to wander blindly into peri-menopause and menopause, having to decipher what the hell is happening to you and convince your doctor that you are not just imagining it. You will have knowledge and resources and support, because Gen-X is in the menopausal trenches right now and we are not putting up with society’s hush-hush-it’s-too-taboo-to-talk-about-menopause BS!

Phew, it felt good to get that off my chest.

Anyway, my contribution to the menopause revolution is that I wrote a book. It’s called What the Fuck, Menopause? The ABCs and WTFs of Menopause. It’s one of those laugh-out-loud gift books that you buy for your girlfriends and sisters and besties and work wives — and for yourself, of course.

I wrote it a couple of years ago when I was feeling particularly pissed off with the world (which definitely comes across in V1) and it’s gone through several iterations since. Now it’s an I-see-you-I-got-you-we’re-in-this-together kind of book — and it’s arguably the funniest thing I’ve ever written (although, my next romcom is fricking hilarious, so maybe second-funniest).

Since my agent started submitting it for publication, we’ve gotten close three times with three big-name publishers on three continents. All three editors saw what I see — this could be a bestselling book that launches an entire brand. And that the time is now. NOW!

The first rejected it because, while the 30-something editor LOVED it, her menopausal colleagues were squeamish about how unapologetically loud it was — so, Gen-Xers not being true to our generation. The second publisher rejected it because it was too close to something else they had in the pipeline — could have been bundled, could have be cross-promoted, but no.

And the third publisher has just rejected it because the menopause market is now crowded, which it wasn’t two years ago when we started shopping this around. Gah! They also want me to become a TikTok sensation in this space and then come back to them — maybe then they will publish it.

Oh, the irony of TikTok being such a strong influence over two different trajectories of my writing career when I have purposefully steered clear of it — and for no other reason than I simply cannot carve out the time to become good at something else when I am writing 3 books (each at various stages), marketing my backlist, and doing paid consulting work.

So, what next for this menopausal romcom author?

I will noodle on what to do with my menopause book — watch this space (but it won’t be starting a TikTok channel) — and I will continue to write heartfelt and hilarious romcoms, because (quite frankly) I’m bloody good at it.

And pssst… I’m also working on two non-romcoms, but that is another blog post as well.

Ciao, peeps. Till next time…

Thrilled to have one of my dearest author friends back on Off the Beaten Track, marking the publication of her passion project Lucky Number. And what a gorgeous cover!

Welcome back, Nina. Tell us what inspired you to write Lucky Number?

I honestly can’t remember where the idea to have a broken-hearted lottery winner came from. It’s so long ago now! I think it’s perhaps as simple as it just came to me and I loved the idea of addressing the age-old question of ‘can money buy happiness?’ It’s not inspired by personal experience sadly. However, from a practical/writing perspective, Lucky Number is probably the most important book I’ve written (to me anyway). It was the first one I ever wrote and I call it ‘my rehab book’ because I started writing it as a way of rebuilding my cognitive capabilities after a significant health event in my life. The inspiration to put fingertips to keyboard and actually write it rather than just having the idea floating around my head came about very unexpectedly. This excerpt from my Acknowledgements sums it up nicely:  

‘I wanted my life back and it felt like an impossible challenge. That was, until a conversation with an ex-boss of mine, Mel MacIntyre, during which she asked if I was using my time off sick from work to write the book I’d always wanted to write. At first, I was thrown by her question. I was far too unwell for that. But her words stayed with me and the seed that she planted grew into something special, helping me to identify what was missing from my recovery plan: ‘physio’ for my brain.  So, I started writing – just ten to fifteen minutes at a time. It was gruelingly difficult and painful to even sit at a desk, but the thing about me is that I can be a determined little bugger. I kept at it, and as I wrote, it got easier and I could write for longer – until eventually I had written my first ever novel: this book, ‘My rehab book’ or if I’m allowed to be a little dramatic, perhaps even the book that saved me. Because it didn’t just help me recover some of my cognitive capabilities, it gave me a renewed sense of self-belief when I badly needed one.’

So, while the book itself doesn’t have headline-grabbing inspiration behind it, Lucky Number has great personal meaning to me and I always wanted it out in the world. And it is now part of a two-book series (the sequel is called Another Lucky Number).

I note that you’ve gone down the independent publishing route with Lucky Number. Can you say a bit more about that?

Yes, of course. Lucky Number was originally called As Luck Would Have it – in fact, I self-published it back in 2016 (or thereabouts) and then took it down from Amazon six weeks later because I was offered representation by a literary agent (I was also querying at the time). However, despite it being the book that got me an agent, it was never bought by a publisher because it didn’t sit cleanly within any genre. I did get great feedback on it though, and that spurred me on to write more books and eventually become successful in getting traditionally published.

As the series still doesn’t have a clear genre (though there is a delicious romance thread that runs right through it), I decided to put it out there myself and have a proper stab at the indie publishing route this time. Though I love being traditionally published author and all the opportunities and learning that comes with that, I’m someone who enjoys being creative without boundaries and this independent approach allows me more of that. I’m also a doer and being in control of my own destiny quite suits me. I’ve enjoyed taking these stories in the direction I wanted them to go, managing the design of my covers and creating my promotional posts such as the one for my cover reveal. In fact, I’m currently doing the same with a children’s book I’ve written, the main characters of which are based on a couple of clay models I also made during my ‘rehab’ period. I will self-publish that too, hopefully this spring.   

It might seem like an odd move to some but it’s actually been a very deliberate one and one that has been great for my mental wellbeing and sense of fulfilment. I am by no means walking away from the traditionally published route and I guess if I were to have to put a label on my situation, I’ve gone ‘hybrid’.

What’s your most recent read that you’d like to recommend?

This is always a difficult question for me to answer. And if I’m totally honest, one that makes me feel a bit ashamed (though I know I shouldn’t). My cognitive issues, which are part of my health condition make reading difficult for me. I know, that sounds bizarre coming from an author (hence the shame), but I think it’s important to talk about these things. Writing is far easier for me and editing is also not too bad because it’s an active rather than a passive activity. I guess it must use different parts of the brain. But reading is a real challenge – I’m slow, I often struggle to take in the words and I find it difficult to concentrate if I’m not editing at the same time. I even find it challenging reading back my own work, which I’m already familiar with, so tinkering with my work as I go is really the only way to keep myself focused.

Previously, I put a lot of pressure on myself to read the books of other authors to support them and try to keep up (and I really do want to support my fellow authors) but it was creating stress for me and I was becoming over tired, and after my last covid infection I had to admit defeat. I haven’t stopped reading altogether, but I have accepted that it’s something I can’t do a lot of, especially when I’m already working with my own texts. That said, I adore stories and storytelling so I watch TV programmes and films – it’s my way of relaxing. I also recently made a great discovery. As long as I’m doing something to keep my brain active (washing dishes, cleaning, etc), I am able to listen to (and actually take in) audiobooks for short periods – and I really enjoy that.

Sorry, that really was a long way around a short cut! To finally answer your question, an audiobook that I recently listened to and really enjoyed was Mhairi McFarlane’s Between Us. Mhairi’s rise to fame coincided with the worst period of my health issues, so despite hearing great things about her books, I had never read one. And now I’m a fan, like so many others.    

What has been your author highlight over the past year?

I honestly think it’s been my shift towards taking the reins myself on some of my writing projects. It has given me such a boost.

What are you working on now?

Currently, I have a few things on the go. I’m getting Another Lucky Number ready for publication. I have the children’s book I mentioned that I am working on – the aim being to publish that this spring under a different pen name. I’m also about to start querying agents to seek representation for a non-fiction book I’ve written, and I’m working on the second book in a romance series I’m writing as well. It’s a juggling act and obviously not everything is in play at once. 

What do you hope readers will take away from Lucky Number?

I hope it will leave them wanting more because there’s a second instalment. Sorry, I had to add in a wee plug there. It’s generally a light-hearted easy read, but as with all my books, there is some poignancy and there are some more serious themes hiding in there. I think there’s an opportunity to reflect on the question of money and how important it really is to our happiness, as well as the important role of elderly people in our world and the benefits of having real experiences, not just doing everything virtually.

More about Lucky Number

Her numbers have come up, but can money really buy her happiness?

Emma is stuck in a rut. Her boss is a bully, she’s missed out on a promotion at work and her partner is a sanctimonious git – not that she knows it until he heartlessly dumps her, leaving her homeless. In an unexpected twist of fate, Emma finds herself with a winning lottery ticket. She thinks a bulging bank balance will make all her problems disappear, and the first thing she’s going to do is have some fun by living like a millionaire for a week.

With romance off the agenda for the foreseeable future, a newly carefree Emma embarks on the experience of a lifetime. But between a series of run ins with a handsome yet irritating stranger and finding herself involved in one disaster after another, her life is soon unravelling again.

Will Emma realise that money doesn’t solve everything? And can she untangle herself enough from the mess she’s in to take a chance at real love?

Order Lucky Number here My thoughts on Lucky Number

Lucky Number is Nina Kaye’s answer to the question ‘Can money really buy me happiness?’ and she does a stellar job in exploring what we think will help us achieve happiness and those aspects that actually form the foundation of happiness – relationships with loved ones.

There are lots of twists and turns as Emma discovers what really matters, wonderful supporting characters, including a very scrummy travel agent, and plenty of Nina Kaye’s trademark humour and poignancy.

About Nina Kaye

Nina Kaye writes warm, witty and uplifting reads with a deeper edge. She has previously published Stand Up Guy, Just Like That, One Night in Edinburgh, Take A Moment and The Gin Lover’s Guide to Dating. Nina lives in Edinburgh with her husband and much adored side-kick, James. In addition to writing, she enjoys swimming, gin and karaoke (preferably all together in a sunny, seaside destination).

Follow Nina

Instagram | Facebook | Website | Amazon | Bookbub

Thank you again, Nina, and huge congrats on Lucky Number.

My latest book baby is out in the world today. I Knew You Were Trouble is the 5th and final book in the Ever After Agency series, which I started writing in November 2022 for Boldwood Books. If you’ve yet to pick it up, I’d recommend starting with Book 1 Match Me If You Can, which introduces Poppy Dean, matchmaker extraordinaire, and the cast of characters who continue throughout the series.

This one is a revenge romcom, our villain a spoilt, conniving ‘trust fund baby’ who collects fiancées like he’s making a human charm bracelet. Our heroine Kate discovers this when fiancée number two’s brother, the scrummy Dutchman Willem, shows up on her London doorstep to tell her his sister is engaged to her fiancé. Follow that?

What ensues is a deliciously fun romp revealing a third fiancée who lives in Verona, jet-setting between cities to uncover, then fix this mess, a revenge plot involving Kate’s former matchmaker Poppy, and a will-they-won’t-they, it’s-really-a-bad-idea romance emerging between Kate and Willem.

I set it in London, like the rest of the series, as well as Amsterdam and Verona, inspired by my own travels and my little homage to three destinations that featured in our 2024 sabbatical.

I absolutely LOVED living in Amsterdam. We housesat for friends over the summer, giving us time to immerse ourselves in the city and providing inspiration for a setting and a love interest. It’s such a vibrant, beautiful city and many of the locations in the book are places we went to.

We also spent time in Verona, our first trip there, and I fell in love with it. I’d already planned to include it in this book, but walking the streets, eating the incredible food, engaging with the culture and history… those parts of the book practically wrote themselves.

And the revenge plot? That idea came early on, but we wanted to leave it until later in the series as Poppy is matchmaker, not a vigilante. And yes, Poppy features in this book as she does in every other book in the series, her point of view giving us insight into the love story – almost like a narrator.

I really hope you enjoy this book. And for series readers, I’ve prepared something special, an epilogue for each of the five couples. I’ll be posting it soon, or you can have a sneak peak here. WARNING! Major spoilers for this book, so don’t read it first if you don’t like spoilers.

As a pre-teen, I started sneaking my mum’s Mills & Boon novels from her bedside table. By my teen years, she was handing over Jackie Collins and Shirley Conran, and I was devouring Sweet Dreams and Sweet Valley High books, feeding a four-books-a-week reading habit.

My love of books, and particularly romance novels, was ingrained by the time I reached adulthood, and I have read widely across the genre for years, occasionally delving into writing, but not producing anything long-form or concrete until I had an epiphany in early 2013.

I was visiting my sister in London, and on her bookshelf was Lindsey Kelk’s I Heart New York. I consumed it in half-a-day, then picked up the next and the next in the series. Three days later, I’d read all five (there are now eight), and as I finished I Heart London, I knew. I wanted to write romantic fiction―specifically, travel romances.

On paper, ‘travel romance novelist’ was a perfect fit for me. I was an avid traveller and had been blogging about it for years. I was also a hopeful romantic, a lifelong romance reader, an English major, and a Drama and English teacher, so I knew about style, structure, grammar, characterisation, dialogue, and genre.

All I had to do was get to work.

My first foray into writing travel romance caught the attention of an agent here in Australia, but when I sent him the full manuscript, he replied with ‘this isn’t your first novel, it’s your fifth’. Apparently, I had too many characters, timelines, and plotlines, and I heeded his advice to ‘go away and write a single, linear narrative’.

Inspired by my real-life ‘meet cute’―meeting my partner, Ben, on a pier in Santorini, just as we were about to embark on a sailing trip around the Greek Islands―I started writing, diverging from real life by introducing a second love interest to the story, the silver fox.

On completion, I went back to the agent and he signed me, shopping my story, which he called, ‘Eat, Sail, Love’, to all the Australian publishers. But as excited as he was to introduce them to a fresh new voice in Australian romantic fiction, no one wanted my particular take on contemporary romantic comedy. My agent had reached the end of his contact list and we parted ways amicably.

Dejected, I wondered if I would ever find my publishing home, or if my manuscript was destined to sit gathering dust. It was only after we returned from another sailing trip in Greece, that I seriously considered self-publishing. Re-energised, I edited my manuscript, paid for cover art and a copy edit, and self-published at the end of 2017. My book baby was out there in the world!

And the timing was perfect. In early 2018, Ben and I embarked on a one-year international sabbatical, which gave me ample time to write the follow ups to my first book. We started the year in Bali, then moved to the US, the UK and Portugal.

When we were in the UK, I came across UKRomChat on Twitter and joined a passionate community of romance authors. It was while engaging with that community that I started considering British publishing houses.

While I self-published book two in the series and wrote book three, I queried UK publishers. After each rejection, I honed my synopses and query letters and reminded myself that I only needed one ‘yes’.

But before I knew it, I was home in Melbourne and back to ‘real life’, hunting an apartment and a job. Could I be happy returning to my profession in adult education and being a part-time novelist who self-published one or two books a year?

Despondency kicked in when I realised that I would never achieve my goal―my dream―of becoming a fulltime novelist.

Not long after, 6 years ago today in fact, I received an email from an imprint of HarperCollins in the UK. It was my one yes. With that offer on the table, I reached out to my agent of choice, Lina Langlee, and after reading my debut, she agreed to represent me (hooray!).

Since my one yes, I’ve published 12 books with 2 publishers (plus 1 audio publisher), sold more than 250,000 copies in English and have translations in 4 languages (and counting). I’ve also written Book 13 (under contract) and 2 side projects.

And I am now a fulltime writer. It really does only take one yes. Never give up on your dream.

Very excited to reveal the cover for 12 Tropes of Christmas, a Christmas romance story anthology I’ve contributed to along with 11 other romance authors. Yes, that’s 12 Christmassy romances, each based on their own trope! Read about my story below.

Battle for the Christmas Bonus (Enemies to Lovers)

Brilliant advertising creative, Sophie Christou, has an excellent idea for Thompson & Co’s annual Christmas advert, and is confident she’s got a shot at pitching the winning campaign. The only potential obstacle? Bad Boy Drew Parker, the sharp and savvy work rival Sophie has been secretly lusting after for years.

Drew, who has been taunting Sophie for years to mask his true feelings, knows his concept for the Christmas ad is a slam-dunk. But how can he convince her to be his ‘second’ on the campaign, when she can barely stand the sight of him?

When the winning campaign goes south due to an unforeseen development, how will the rivals set aside their differences – and ignore their growing attraction – to deliver a world-class Christmas advert in time?

Other authors, titles and tropes

And look at the rest of this lineup!

Ida Brady – Holly and the Bad Beau (Good Girl/Bad Boy & Second Chance)

Heidi Catherine – Ho, Ho … Whoa! (Holiday Fling)

Anna Foxkirk – Merry Hell (Jilted Bride)

Anne Freeman – Sing it Again, Carol (One Married, Twice Shy)

Louisa Duval – ‘Twas the Grump before Christmas (Grumpy/Sunshine)

Jodi Gibson – Under the Mistletoe (Friends to Lovers)

Nicola Marsh – Christmas Castaways (Brother’s Best Friend)

Megan Mayfair – Merry Quizmas (Fake Relationship)

Cassandra O’Leary – Girl in the Snow (Forced Proximity)

Davina Stone – Angel for Christmas (Sports Romance)

Sharyn Swanepoel – The Reality of Christmas (Reality TV Romance)

Pre-order your copy now!

12 Tropes of Christmas will be available in paperback and eBook through Amazon from the 1st of October. Pre-order now from only 99c.

Amazon AU | Amazon UK | Amazon US | Amazon CA | Amazon DE | Amazon NL

Hello lovely readers!

Just touching base to see if you are following me in all the places you will hear my bookish news, including price drops and new releases and cover reveals.

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Happy reading!

It’s hard to believe it’s that time again!

The end of 2023 and the time of year when I reflect on the year that was, mentally and emotionally prepare for the year to come, and absolve myself from a selection of ‘must dos’.

My theory is this: life is simply too short to get swept up in ‘must dos’, so why waste precious time torturing myself?

I started writing New Year’s Absolutions in 2011 when I absolved myself from losing a few pounds, buying a bike (I lived in Seattle at the time which is wet and hilly), reading Oprah Book Club selections (still stand by that one), checking work emails at home (of course, we all pretty much work from home now), and finishing a re-write of Chapter 7 of a book that will never see the light of day.

All good absolutions and now onto 2024’s …

Colouring my hair

Those who have been following me through 2023 will have noticed that I am no longer dark (honey) blonde. I am embracing my natural salt and pepper hair and by ’embracing’ I mean: I stopped colouring my hair in May and in September I spent 7 hours (and a LOT of $$$) at the hair salon to make me look like this:

I thought I would wait till my 60s, but the upkeep of being brunette, then light brown, then dark blonde (I’ve been going lighter over the past 5 years) was expensive and exhausting. Like many of my contemporaries, I’m jumping on the silver vixen train!

Joining TikTok (still)

This is a carry over from 2022 and 2021 and even though TikTok has spawned BookTok, which creates instant bestsellers, I’m still not getting an account. As an author, I am already on socials for hours every week. I don’t need to add another platform that requires a light ring and lipstick. Besides, most people who excel at producing content for TikTok, work so hard and do such a great job. Maybe one day when I’m writing fulltime, I’ll consider joining TikTok (or its equivalent), but until then I’m leaving it to the pros.

Keeping all my books

This is going to be a tough one, especially as I am a die-hard book lover (fiction, non-fiction, travel, cookbooks…) and I love creating little ‘vignettes’ on my bookshelves. But unless they’re my books (as in, I wrote them) or they are one of my favourite books of all time, in 2024, I will be letting a lot of my books go, free to good homes.

This is because in 2024, Ben and I will be leaving Melbourne for another round-the-world sabbatical. We will be offloading a lot of our furniture and belongings, and storing only the essentials for our return to Australia. A cookbook I was given in 2001 that I never read doesn’t make the list. And won’t it be fun to fill these shelves again when we return?

Giving up my Twitter (not X) profile

I loved Twitter once. I was an early(ish) adopter, so I was able to snag @SandyBarker as my username. I actively contributed to (mostly) writing communities. I posted daily. I built up my followers (nearing 7000), and it was my primary source of news and information.

Then Elon bought it and broke it like a snotty little brat.

Now I go on once a week or so and retweet my close network’s tweets and perhaps add one of my own. I look at that ugly black X and roll my eyes. And I never in a million years thought I would say this, but my new fave platform is Instagram (I know, right?). But I am not closing my Twitter account. I live in hope that Elon will get bored and sell it to someone who restores what was once good about it and elevates the platform, rather than stomping it into the ground, shoveling on a truckload of manure, and setting it on fire (Like Elon did).

Arguing with people online

There is so much to say about this…

First, I am now in my mid-50s and most women I know in this age bracket are over it. And by ‘it’, I mean ridiculous behaviour, entitlement, lies, stupidity and/or willful ignorance, rudeness, and just plain idiocy. (Noting that many friends and family members from other age brackets and genders are also over it, but I see a prevalence amongst my demographic).

And where are we exposed most to these behaviours? Online.

But here’s what I’ve learnt about people who behave badly online (not an exhaustive list):

They want to argue.I will never convince them they are wrong/behaving badly no matter how eloquently I make my point or how correct or salient it is.They believe that the (perceived) anonymity of their online identity entitles them to be their worst selves, even if they’d never do or say these things in person. I say ‘perceived’ because it is SO easy to find out who is behind the profile.THEY ARE NOT WORTH MY TIME OR ENERGY.

The last one is the clincher. These people can suck the joy out of anything. DO NOT ENGAGE!

IMPORTANT: This includes people who are rude or mean when reviewing my books. I’ve said it many times: I know my books are not for everyone; I don’t expect everyone to enjoy my books. I also know that, even though I am writing my 11th book (actually 13th, as I have some side projects), I have MUCH more to learn about writing books, which is why I will continue to read and study the craft as I write.

But there is no reason to be rude or mean when reviewing my books or anyone else’s.

This year, via book reviews, I’ve been accused of plagiarism, and described as a ‘green author’ and an ‘amateur author’ (separate reviews for Books 4 and 9). And one reviewer said she hated my book with a passion, explaining how she hates authors that… [list of sins here].

You know what I say online when I don’t like a book? Nothing. Nada. Nicht. Rien. Niets. I follow the ‘Rule of Thumper’.

And, as ‘arguing with people online’ might require me to say something ‘not nice’, I absolve myself from even going there.

And that’s all for 2024, everyone.

Wherever you are in the world, I wish you a safe and happy 2024, and for some of you, I will see you soon.

Sandy x

So excited to reveal the cover for my next book with Boldwood Books, Shout Out to My Ex.

Out February 14, 2024

About the book

Fashion designer, Elle Bliss, is unlucky in love.

She’s still hung up on her first love, Leo, who ended things abruptly, then mysteriously disappeared – and a decade on, no one else can measure up.

But Elle’s all-time dream of showing in Paris Fashion Week is about to become a reality, and she has no time to dwell on her dismal love life. That is until Leo – now going by Lorenzo – comes back into her life.

A celebrated up-and-coming shoe designer, ‘Lorenzo’ is nothing like the man she fell in love with. Rude, brash and with an ego the size of Paris, he’s too caught up in his own celebrity.

But as they constantly cross paths in the city of love, Elle begins to question how much of ‘Lorenzo’ is an act – a persona for the cameras. Because deep down, she can see glimpses of the man he was, and feelings from all those years ago become impossible to ignore…

Join Elle in the most romantic city in the world in this laugh out loud enemies-to-lovers romance, perfect for fans of Sophie Kinsella and Emily Henry.

Praise for the Ever After Agency series

‘…another brilliant romcom – a series set in a matchmaking agency is a match made in heaven and I am fully signed up!’ ~ Pernille Hughes

‘Sandy Barker’s books are the bookish equivalent of a perfect serve: two parts romance, one part humour with a generous dash of escapism. I can never wait to dive in!’ ~ Nina Kaye

‘Full of fun – a fast-paced, exciting new series with love, heart, friendship and joy.’ ~ Kim Nash

‘You can’t really go wrong with a Sandy Barker romcom – charm, romance and humour.’ ~ Julie Houston

‘I love Sandy’s writing and end up falling in love with all of her heroes!’ ~ Katie Ginger

‘…warm, witty and wonderfully romantic. Knowing there are more to come definitely makes me happy ever after.’ ~ Kathleen Whyman

‘This series is witty, fun and, of course, wonderfully romantic.’ ~ Anita Faulkner

Out February 14 Preorder now

I am delighted to welcome Anna to Off the Beaten Track, We’ve been connected on social media for several years and got to meet in person at a recent Romance Writers of Australia meet-up and she was so much fun to hang out with. And now to our catch-up…

Welcome Anna. Tell us what inspired you to write Alice and the Impossible Game?

The travel bug – for me, it’s chronic! A constant itch. I’m making that sound painful, but actually IMHO there’s nothing better than visiting somewhere new and experiencing life and culture away from my ‘ordinary’. I’m fortunate to have lived in a lot of amazing countries (Fiji, Kiribati, Sri Lanka, Nepal, Indonesia, Germany, France, Australia) and visited a whole lot more, so perhaps it’s not surprising that traveling and holidays are going to feature my stories. Plus, I’d already written my novella, Alice in Wanderlust (the prequel to Alice and the Impossible Game) pre-Covid as part of my Passport to Love series. During the pandemic writing and reading became even more important to me as they were my only means of escape when we were stuck in lockdown. The only problem was that there was a lot of angst in my first draft – not exactly romcom – so although I knew I wanted to write a road-trip romance, I had to throw it out and start again. The writing process has taken longer than ideal, but I can’t wait to share it with everyone on 1st March 2024, and sometimes the most challenging journeys reap the greatest rewards, don’t you think?

When did you start writing seriously?

Seriously? Most of the time, I try NOT to write ‘seriously’ or at least not to take myself and my writing too seriously. If I did, I think I’d shut down and not write anything. Long story short –  my dad was a published author and although I aspired to write from a young age, I didn’t think it was possible to become a published author. I knew how hard it had been for him. However, I’ve always loved to write even when it was a hobby and just for me.  When my husband and I made the big leap and moved to Australia ten years ago, I decided to give NANOWRIMO (National Novel Writing Month – when writers attempt to bang out 50k words in a month) a crack. I successfully wrote my first 50k (of drivel) which I thankfully then lost after lending a friend my laptop which she accidentally wiped –  talk about a blessing in disguise. But it showed me I could write more than just a bad first chapter. After that, I think the event which changed my perspective about becoming a published author was attending the Romance Writers of Australia Conference in 2016 and realising that I was no different to anybody else and my dreams were possible if I just stuck with them.

What do you love most about being an author?

The awesome writing community in Australia – there is so much strength and succour to be gained from the support and friendship of fellow authors. As I mentioned previously, I also love the escapism of writing: all the stress and responsibilities of real life fall away because I get so wrapped up in my creative world. I love that feeling…Unfortunately, my family don’t love and are long-suffering about the very late and often cremated dinners I create…

What are you working on now?

Final editing of Alice and the Impossible Game. A super exciting Christmas anthology project with 12 other AMAZING romcom authors for next year, but my lips are sealed and stapled for now. And also a new contemporary celebrity-collides- with- smalltown series called Rush to Stardom…

Nothing like juggling multiple balls to keep you on your toes!

What do you hope readers will take away from Alice and the Impossible Game?

Well, my author tagline is love, laughter and happy ever after, so those things are what I always try to bring to the page. But for this book in particular, the notion that nothing is impossible (within reason, of course – I’m never going to be a ballerina!). If you believe in yourself and commit whole-heartedly to your goals and aspirations, you’ll be amazed by what you can accomplish. That doesn’t mean we get everything we want in life, but if we keep believing and keep working hard, we get a whole lot more than if we lose faith in ourselves and give up. Who was it that said, The harder I work the luckier I get? They were bang on.

I couldn’t agree more, Anna. And I cannot wait for Alice in Wanderlust (great title, by the way) and that anthology!

More about Anna

Born in Fiji, Anna has spent most of her life trotting round the globe living in some far flung places such as the islands of Kiribati, Kathmandu in Nepal, Sri Lanka and Indonesia. Anna served as an officer in the British army for seven years, including four operational military tours in war-torn Bosnia and living in Edinburgh Castle. Anna’s love of adventure, romance and humor blaze a trail through her stories. Nowadays, when she’s not writing or reading, Anna enjoys a quiet(ish!) life teaching English and humanities to secondary school students, swimming, hanging out at the local yacht club, and sampling the many delicious wines of the beautiful Mornington Peninsula where she lives. What you probably don’t know and don’t want to know…Anna is a wannabe cowgirl and line-dancing tragic. It’s a work in progress…

Follow Anna

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About Alice and the Impossible Game

Alice’s gap year travel plans in Australia are scuppered on New Year’s Eve when her identical twin sister, Tilly, (aka Twister) bails and returns to the UK without apology or explanation. In a supreme effort to get Tilly back on board (and to find out why on earth she left), Alice reluctantly agrees to Tilly’s Impossible Game. But Alice never counted on Guy, the hot lead singer of Aussie band, RiffRaff, being part of the package.

Guy’s not interested in any sort of commitments other than his musical career and the future of his band, RIffRaff…oh, and his next musical gig which happens to be at his brother’s wedding. As well as being a key member of RiffRaff, Tilly had promised to be his plus one…Now she’s gone missing, he needs to find a substitute and fast.

Alice is in a fix. Travelling alone and compelled to follow the rules of her sister’s Six Impossible Things Game her life is spiraling out of control.

Guy needs a fix. A bandaid for his band and his fragile ego and a hostile-as-hell wedding situation…

But the Impossible Game looks like it might just play HAVOC with both of their best laid plans. And the only thing you should believe¾there is likely to be some collateral damage…

Pre-order Alice and the Impossible Game

Amazon US | Amazon AU | Amazon CA | Amazon UK

And catch up on the prequel, Alice in Wanderlust, now!

Thank you so much for joining us, Anna!