Magenta Periwinkle's Blog

I want to make or have a book trailer for my novels, so very very bad, but there are so many issues of why i don't have one yet, 1. I don't know any teens to star in it, 2. a video where my cats do the talking, just doesnt make sense. 3. music, what are the copy right laws on youtube videos 4. editing, what software to use, let alone filming or splicing the video. 5. what scene from the book to deal with 6. ok that might be all the issues i have, but seems like a lot. i wish i could have a contest for fans to make the video, but not sure how i would go about that and what the winning item would be... i need help. but i want it so bad.

I've  been thinking about this phrase, "makes life worth it" does this imply that the majority of life is crap? and that there are only a few (far in between) things that make going through all that crap worth it? if that is the case than that sucks, why do we make life so freaking hard? should it not be the other way around, "things that  make life not worth it" ? feeling all googley, I search and guess who has an article about it "psychology today" what makes life worth living.... give me a second to read it.... "Here are some possible answers to the question of what makes life worth living: (1) nothing; (2) religion; (3) happiness; (4) love, work, and play. Evidence from psychology and neuroscience supports the fourth answer." hmmmm.... that was just the first sentence, for me i work two jobs, i play little, and love, well not so sure that exists although i do suspend disbelief on a daily basis, now anxiety about "loved ones" well i guess that answers my question, those who I love, are those who i worry about. "You can have happiness without much meaning, and meaning without much happiness; so happiness is not the meaning of life." hmmm, so does that mean that finding what makes life worth it is the meaning of life, the goal, like old whats his face "samuel johnson" and the whole idea that the path to happiness is not about the destination but the path itself, that it is the search of happiness that is the happiness, that as long as you are working towards some sort of goal and it doesnt matter what that goal is, then you will feel as if you life has meaning, and that if you should attain said goal you should find a new one, because only in the quest can you be happy. that is true for me, i am most depressed when i have no goal, when i am not working on a novel, or getting another useless college degree or moving, or anything else of significance. so, if you have read the above mentioned article then you will see that he came to about the same conclusion as i did... which btw was not a new idea i just had.... wrote a whole stupid paper on it years ago.... so back to the question what makes my life worth living.... monkeys, babies, books, movies,... when does live not seem worth it? maybe just about anytime i'm not in the middle of reading a really good book.... so my answer books make life worth it. still seems like we spend a lot more time on the things that don't make life worth it, like work, obsessions, depressions, cleaning house.

Summary: Howard comes back and proclaims his love to Mackenzie but she is already dating hunter? who realizes that he likes Mackenzie more than his therapist, but then he finds Mackenzie's file, reads it and finds out about her and Alexandria, and Howard, so then he is upset, but then Mackenzie finds out that his therapist is fired for seeing hunter, and then Mackenzie is mad, then Howard finds out about hunter, and he is mad, and then Alexandria finds out about Mackenzie and Howard ( who recently left her), so she tries to be with hunter, who is trying to get revenge on both Mackenzie and Fay. Then Mackenzie's therapist suggests a group session between everyone, in which everyone leaves happy. Yeah right. Forget who's dating who, so did they. A story of twincest, love, betrayal, and a monkey, okay there's not a monkey, but there should be, every good story needs a monkey.
Is the story all told in sessions? With flashbacks? seems like the right thing to do, and end with the group session... in which hunter and Mackenzie realize they want to be together, Mackenzie and Alex repair their sisterhood, Howard and Alex make up, and Fay realizes that she should go work at the club where she can make 500 a night instead of 400. Turns out she already worked there. Alex is pregnant, and Howard realizes being a father is more important, than being an uncle/father. Hunter realizes that although Mackenzie has a troubled past, that she really is the shy good girl he is looking for. Mackenzie realizes that the only reason she wanted either Alexandria or Howard, was because she felt neglected by their parents, and wanted someone to want her more than they wanted anything in the world. Hmm should Mackenzie and Fay both be pregnant also? That would be really funny if Mackenzie, Alexandria and Fay were all carrying hunter's babies. All the babies would be born around the same time, they could all get induced at the same time, and he could run back and forth between them all. Hmmm, maybe he didn't even know that Mackenzie had a twin, and she takes Mackenzie's place after they break up, and he doesn't suspect a thing until he runs into Mackenzie while with Alexandria, and Alex acts like she is Mackenzie and like Mackenzie is really off her rocker. hmmm, where am I actually wanting this to go, it is getting stranger and stranger, is not the whole sister/therapist issues enough without complicating things, but we do know that Howard will have to come back, and somehow the whole issue with Alex will have to be resolved, maybe that is how Mackenzie forgives Alex and vice versa, maybe that's it, a switch, Alex and hunter end up together, and Mackenzie and Howard end up together, and Fay, well no one likes her, so she ends up alone. so, how would this work, hunter and Mackenzie break up, a few days later, Alex shows up, having been watching her sister from the distance, (but how does this work with the whole therapy trope) maybe that's the catch, both hunter and the reader thinks that he is still dating Mackenzie, but then they are confused why Mackenzie's therapy talks about dating Howard, (Alex know that Howard left her for Mackenzie as he tells her  that he is really in love with her sister, devastated she starts watching Mackenzie and hunter and then notices their fight, then follows him home, sees where he lives and plans to come back later, or does she wait for him outside of one of his classes? anyways she goes up to him, kisses him and begs for his forgiveness, he accepts it after she explains Mackenzie's relationship with herself (Alex) or does he promise to stop seeing his therapist and instead starts seeing the same one that Mackenzie is seeing and that is how he sees the file, not sure if that is better than him seeing it after hours, maybe Fay asks him to get her purse out of the file room and he sees Mackenzie's file lying out) hmmm not sure if they should have the fight over both things at the same time?  maybe she finds out about him first and then he finds out about her, is mad and runs into her on campus confronts her and she is more wild, outgoing and etc because she is really Alex, he doesn't think much of it although he does notice a huge change, wait is this not like that book by the author of the time travelers wife? Still not sure how he could forgive her for what she did, it won't be easy. What a mess. Maybe he forgives her when he sees what a mess she is, especially knowing what he did, and now I've lost my train of thought.

[image error]

Need I even write anything on this post, one wants me to be exclusive, and now the other wants me not to mention any information gathered from the exclusive site, well how in the world am I supposed to be able to get information on my books from any other site than the bookstore, when the bookstore won't let me sell it anywhere else, and I refuse to create a website... okay maybe that is what I should do, as we all know I can't choose between two great things. One gives me close to 3000 sales, although some were free copies, the other has given me 883 potential readers, 42 ratings, 22 reviews and other authors who I can network with.

I'm mostly writing this blog so that my last blog isn't the one that everyone sees on all the pages I have connected to it. I don't really have a reason. But tonight I have been thinking about the German word for bully, on the German amazon page for my book, the category that my book is listed under is MOBBING, now is that not a perfect word for bullying, I mean seriously if I am walking down a deserted street and I see a group of teenage boys, I am more afraid than if I were to see just one, and why is that? Because of MOB mentality, I don't trust mobs, mobs are who gang up and bully others, the ones in school who as a group tortured  those of us who were not apart of their mob. Years ago in one of my psychology classes I began thinking about the idea of "us versus them" people are more comfortable when they can divide the population into enemies and friends. That if someone is different then they are apart of the "other group" and that they should be destroyed, I guess this scares me as I have always been one of those others, and try to see people as individuals instead of as groups, although that is hard during christmas time working at the mall :), hmmm maybe that is why I don't like large groups of people. Anyways, mobbing what an interesting term.

In other news, I have both of my books listed for free on Amazon through Saturday, tomorrow for those of you who have lost track of what day it is, and the first day up the books did really well over 1000 downloads the first day, things have slowed down since then, which kinda worries me about who is downloading the books, are they actual readers or serial book downloaders, that just because a book is free that they should get a copy, that makes no sense to me, but honestly there seems a shortage of GOOD books to get for free, maybe I missed the peak and everybody already posted their books for free, or just maybe not that many people were willing to give exclusive rights in order to have their books in the program, we will see how it turns out. either way, whether people read them or not, there are now 1693 copies of my novel in existence.

1693 copies and I still feel the same as I did with 350 last month, I wonder at what point I will feel accomplished, maybe it is when I have more than two reviews on amazon, or maybe never, maybe I will see millions and still worry about whether anyone wants to read my books.

So I had little to say and ended up saying alot, that's the thing about writing, hard to get motivated to get started but when you do, it really isn't that hard.

Dear Bookstore in the Sky,

I'm very sorry, I didn't know we were exclusive, as you never put a ring on my finger. I'm sorry I didn't read your letter before I agreed to something without realizing, but now I know, and I love you, and I won't do it again, please keep selling my books, I broke up with all the other booksellers, and will keep it that way as long as you forgive me. I'll even sell my books for free for five days so that you can get more customers, and maybe then you will realize that I would have agreed to anything you offered, as I trusted you, having shopped with you since I was 16, I thought we were on the same pages, virtual pages even, but now I know, when you ask me to listen, that it is important and I should pay attention, no more clicking boxes without reading the fine print. Please believe me that I never wanted to hurt you. I love you Bookstore.

Faithfully Yours,

Magenta & Keli

So, having spent 6 hours listening to Cutting Class on my kindle, and fixing the errors on my computer, I can now say although still not perfect the book now has a lot leas typos. :) have I mentioned how much I hate editing? Or how much of a pain it is to ask your friends and family to edit your book for the billionth time?

I would gladly pay to have a professional edit it, but I have little time to figure out who provides legitimate services at reasonable prices, any suggestions?

I admit that I should have waited to publish Cutting Class until I had more than one person read the draft, but God I love the book and would rather have it judged by the world than have it sit in my closet waiting for me to die before it sees the light of day.

I like the book for the same reason that some people hate it, I like having a fine line between the brain's distinction between first and third person point of views, how even though logically you know that the stories are separate, they almost start to look alike, just how generations of families promise that they wont end up like their parents and then looking closer realize that sometimes that fate is unavoidable.

In other words some of the confusing parts of the novel are on purpose, to make you stop and think, now who was that, the father or the son?

Now when I used the wrong name, i.e. J.B. instead of P.B. well that was plain old sloppiness.

Another purposeful point I was trying to make, was the trope of the main character not having a name. I would love to disclose her name, but honestly I have no clue what her name was. "Tell me your name, tell me your name," the thought repeats in my mind, because she was always known to me as UKG, "Unknown Girl", and why should I or anyone else know her name? She represents the common outsider, not the jock, nor the cheerleader, nor even the geek but the girl or guy who walks the halls of the high school, just sort of blending in, just getting by, never noticed and yet struggling on the inside.

How many students do you think, go the whole school day without saying a single word? I know I've met many. Wallflowers- thats a name for them.

Well, she's that girl, the one, twenty years down the line at your high school reunion, that you say "oh yeah, I remember her, she's the one whose boyfriend burnt down the school, now what was her name?" and for the life of you, no names come to mind and of course she isnt in the yearbook....

For any reader who reviews one of my two novels, I would like to give a kindle copy of the opposite novel. Reader must have read the reviewed book, and write a review worth reading, good or bad. Review the first novel on either goodreads or amazon or barnes and noble, and email me (sentimental.bullshit@yahoo.com) your email address and I will send you a link to receive your own kindle copy of either Cutting Class, or Sentimental Bulls#*t.

I have been toying with a new novel, and haven't decided exactly what i want to write. I had this wild idea that I would start writing EROTICA, that I might gain more readers that way, and possibly even people who don't care if I use the wrong word, or mispell something, that if i put enough juicey stuff, the new readers wouldn't care about anything else. The problem is that I can't just write EROTICA, that would be to normal for me, instead I want to write Taboo Subject Erotica, such as, and don't freak out, as I am sure that this is more prevalent in our society than we are lead to believe, Sister Twincest, I looked on amazon and i couldn't find a single book about this, although I am sure many a porn has used the idea, it didn't appear that any books covered the subject to my satisfaction. I think the idea came to me, years ago, probably after reading the Time Traveler's Wife, when his future self or was it his past self, and does it really matter which self, came to him in his present, and they decided to mess around. What a novel idea, the idea of messing around with your self, but your self in another body. This led me to think about if I had a twin, how would I feel about her, especially if we were exactly the same, would I enjoy her company, would we fight over the same side of the bed, would we share my boyfriend, would we forget boys and forget sides of the bed, and decide to snuggle as close as possible, I mean she is my same size and smell and everything else, wouldn't it just feel like she was an extension of myself? Maybe instead of writing a novel about twincest, I would write a science fiction novel about clonning one's self and then having a romantic partnership. Hmmm, maybe both novels are a good idea... my audience is going to be so small :). Back to the twincest novel, though this may contain some spoilers for the book that is not yet complete. The two girls in my novel, the twincest one, not the clone one, grow up sharing a bed, sharing everything even the lose of their virginity as teenagers to the same guy and at the same time. The problem her is that we  know they snuggled in bed while growing up, but what if things went further than that, would my writing it make it child pornography? I don't want to go there, but I also don't think it would work to say "they never did anything until the day of their 18th birthday, wink wink" that seems like such a copout. btw I don't think my blogger application has spell check, so sorry I am the worst speller of all time, but back again to the two sisters, so say they didn't do anything until they were 18, and until they lose their virginities to the boyfriend of one of the twins, and that he fantizies about the two twins feeling each other up, and a little kissing, etc., and then the twins get the idea in their heads to fool around more, but without the male influence, and one of the twins (the one who the boyfriend does not belong to) gets jellous and possessive of her twin, and seduces the boyfriend into sleeping with her, by pretending to be her twin, but he secretly knows it is her and does it anyways, the night before his wedding, btw that is the sisters plan, to break up the wedding btwn her sister who she is in love with and the boy who was in love with her. So, sister does not sucessed in breaking up the wedding, but does find herself alienated by her whole family, and thus she seeks therapy at her university, where she meets a boy who is afraid of girls, but somehow allows his own counselor to seduce him during his weekly 45 minute appointments, and occasionally at night when no one is in the office, and one on such visits, he is left alone for a minute in the file room, where he reads the twin's file and finds out she slept with her sister, he then becomes freaked out, until the twin finds out he is sleeping with his counselor, and thus they body become extremely freaked out, and then they accept eachother's bad decisions, and they live happily ever after. So, how does that sound? Would any one read it? or how about my other idea, super sexy hot 21 year old college student is in a horrible botched robbery of a store, where he happens to be shopping, and somehow, probably trying to be a hero, he gets shot in the head, and miraculously servives but is now mentally challenged, but still super hot and sexy and 100% whiling to have sex with who ever the protagonist is, and yet she has some huch moral dilema about whether it would be wrong to seduce him, who would have done her even with full functioning of his brain, and is still 100% willing even though he doesn't understand the consequences.  Is this idea for a book wrong, or more importantly, illegal? Is it acceptable to the law  to have fiction out there that uses the idea of a handcapped male to turn on the masses of Erotica reading females? I don't want to write anything that is illegal, and I don't want to write anything that is normal, where is the middle ground?  

CUTTING CLASS


Aug 11, 2011 Kwoomac rated it [image error]
Shelves: first-reads, reviewed, young-adult  Goodreads freebie. This story was filled with tragic figures. First, we have Johnny Boy. Johnny's mother is the school librarian, who is known to all to be a whore. She was raped as a young girl by her own father. Johnny's father, unbeknownst to him, is his grandfather. His mother has protected him from this info by telling him his father was a soldier who died in Afghanistan. The father/grandfather, in addition to being a pedophile, was also an arsonist. While in prison for arson, he killed himself by setting himself on fire. This is more info Johnny Boy's mother has not shared with him. It is somewhat hard to believe that in a small town Johnny doesn't here about his grandfather from others. The story is partly told through the journal Johnny Boy's mother kept while she was in high school. I particularly liked these journal entries. They were so full of the extremes and drama typical of a teenage girl. I smiled while reading them, it was so easy to see this girl full of romantic dreams. Johnny Boy has spent 17 years in prison for arson and murder. It is not 'til the end of the book, that the reader learns the truth about the fire.
The main characters in the present time are Pony Boy (child of Johnny Boy) and a girl he goes to high school with, Pixie. Pony Boy is an angry boy, who grew up without knowing his father at all. While he did know about his father, his mother never brough in to prison to visit his father, until the week before his father was released form prison. His mother finally introduced father and son because she is dying of breast cancer. Pony Boy is seventeen. Pixie is the daughter of Meghan, another tragic figure. Meghan was a beautiful girl in high school, popular, a cheer leader. Meghan survived the fire that killed her boyfriend Ducky. She was pregnant with Pixie (birth name Calliope) at the time. She suffered major burns. Her response to this was to become a drinker. She has been married and divorced six times and spends her nights with an endless series of lovers. She pays little attention to her daughter. Pixie and Pony Boy are in the early stages of a relationship, when PB's father gets out of jail. The two stories are told alternately, with both building toward a crescendo. This is where we learn the true story of the fire Johnny Boy went to jail for. We also learn how Pony Boy will deal with everything going on in his life; his budding relationship with Pixie, his mother's dying, and his father's new role in his life.
This was a book full of lost souls. I was rooting for them to find their way. unlike 1 like · see review Aug 02, 2011 Stephanie rated it [image error]
Shelves: first-reads I won this book in a Goodreads First Reads giveaway.

I believe that this book was an advance copy, explaining the grammatical errors (incorrect words in place of the right ones, i.e. too instead of to), which was a little distracting for someone like me (I'm a teacher and those kind of things drive me crazy), but that's not relevant.

The basic premise and story line is good, but the way things tended to bounce around was distracting from the story. There was continual change in the point of view and topics, sometimes making it difficult to remember who was speaking and about what. The bold face entries made it clear when P.B.'s mom is writing about her high school experience and romance with P.B's father Johnny, but the parts of the book written in the present day were constantly changing point of views, which took away from the story.

I enjoyed the premise and story, but the way it was told kind of turned me off to it. I think if the storytelling was improved, it would make a world of difference.

Thank you for the chance to read it though! unlike 1 like · see review May 15, 2011 Magenta Periwinkle rated it [image error]  ·  (Review from the author)  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: coming-of-age, realistic-fiction, high-school, romance, wishlist, ya, teen-angst, ya-fiction, young-adult, young-adult-teen, young-adult-romance, young-adult-coming-of-age-92-user So, once again I will break the moral code and write my own review just like I did for Sentimental Bulls#*t.

Half the novel is about Johnny who doesn't talk to many people, so when he taps the shoulder of a girl in math class and asks her "Do you like monkeys?" it is a big deal. Johnny's home life sucks and all he wants is to stay out of trouble, and yet, he keeps finding himself with fighting the captain of the school football team, who used to be his best friend. The girl Johnny likes, carries around a worn copy of the Outsiders, and Johnny can't help but hide his new relationship with her.

The second part of the book is about P.B. (named after PonyBoy from the Outsiders), I wonder who his parents are?

· see review Aug 01, 2011 Kayla Baldwin rated it [image error]
Shelves: first-reads, owned I won this book as part of a Goodreads First-Reads contest.

To be honest, it did take me a while to get into this book. The viewpoint kept jumping around, and it took me a few chapters to understand the different relationships. It also started off sounding like another one of those angry teenager stories, but towards the middle there were some twists that I did not expect, and in the end, I ended up really liking the book and it was something unique. unlike 1 like · see review Oct 06, 2011 Ryan Lucero rated it [image error] I love books about teens on the edge and a little messed up. The story about the parents, fascinating.
The character development is admirable and it makes you wonder what is going on in the mind of the author that would inspire this story. unlike 1 like · see review Sep 14, 2011 Vicky rated it [image error]  ·  review of another edition Well this book is definitely an interesting read. Before i comment on the story though i just want to say that there was a lot of typos. The story is completely different to anything i expected, in a good way. What happens surprises you and its believable and intensely emotional. You feel connected to the characters and the story reads well although it is a little confusing sometimes. Overall i enjoyed it immensely and would recommend it as its not the usual sappy love story written for the YA group. SENTIMENTAL BULLS#*T Apr 20, 2011 Magenta Periwinkle rated it [image error]  ·  (Review from the author)
Shelves: young-adult, coming-of-age, romance, young-adult-romance, high-school, books-about-death, young-adult-teen, realistic-fiction, ya, ya-fiction, wishlist So, I'm sure it is very wrong to review your own book and if this were amazon it would delete my review... but let us see if I can get away with it here.

I think that Sentimental Bulls#*t is different than most of the books out there. I'm sure everyone says that about their book, but I'm sure mine is, and that is why Sentimental Bulls#*t is not for everyone.

The book starts out with Rose who is about to leave home to go to art school in New York City, where she thought she dreamed of going, but things have changed since she applied.

Rose's best friend Shade came home for Christmas Vacation and Rose couldn't have been more excited but then somehow they end up spending less time together than Rose anticipated and Rose begins spending more time with Patrick, Shade's recent ex.

Sure the same old group of friends still goes places together, but things have changed and Rose finds herself exiled from the group.

Which finds her in New York where she meets the cutest boy she has ever dared talk to Dysan.

The story alternates between her present with Dysan and her past with Shade and Patrick, until she must choose whether to stay in the past with her memories or move forward in her relationship with Dysan and New York City. Magenta Periwinkle(less) · see review Apr 26, 2011 Linda Thao marked it as to-read I can't wait to read this book!! unlike 1 like · see review Aug 19, 2011 Ronald Hopkins rated it [image error] After days of reading, I realized this book has great potential to be something special, unique, or in it's own way a classic. I believe the author has her own voice and opinions, Which she gladly displayed in the story. Though, I did find it at times average, I still believe that this book has the potential to be more then it is. I love the title(it's eye-catching) the cover is amazing and original, and the characters don't feel like your average, dull, ordinary, generic cast. Thank you so much good reads for allowing me to win this book and I hope to read more from the author and see her grow and change in her writing. If I could give this book a grade I'd say it was worthy of a 3.5/5 ^___^. (less) unlike 1 like · see review May 01, 2011 Melissa rated it [image error] I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads. unlike 1 like · see review May 01, 2011 Lisa Mathis rated it [image error]
Shelves: first-reads I Loved this book!! The author, Magenta Periwinkle, did an amazing job conveying the often conflicted thoughts and feelings of youth. Within the pages of this book are opportunities to completely submerse yourself in the memories of your own relationships with people that have since become a fixture of your past. Thank you for the chance to re-examine:
- The bond of a childhood friendship, that you will never find again.
- A betrayal so great, you will forever feel unresolved.
- The feelings of complete emptiness you feel when losing someone you love so dearly.
- And Mostly, for the strength to realize that life will go on!
I highly recommend this book to everyone who has struggled with the choices of life. (less) unlike 2 likes · see review Sep 30, 2011 •••Makenna••• marked it as to-read
Shelves: must-read One question:
Why isn't the Converse on the cover purple?!?!?! unlike 2 likes · see review May 01, 2011 ❤♏αια (My Book Diaries) marked it as to-read
Shelves: first-reads I won this from this from Goodreads. Can't wait to read this! unlike 1 like · see review May 01, 2011 Julie Harrison rated it [image error]
Shelves: first-read This book definitely keeps you guessing. I wanted to know what was going to happen next. Quite a few grammar mistakes. Very good read. unlike 1 like · see review

About Magenta Periwinkle
Magenta Periwinkle is the pseudonym for Keli Chaffin lives in Texas with her three cats and hopes to someday own a monkey. Keli has two useless bachelor's degrees, one in Photography and one in Psychology. She works in a psychologist office and thinks she has some idea about the workings of the human psyche. More about Magenta Periwinkle...